This week the Hack or Slash team explores the beginning of Rob Zombie’s film career by checking out his directorial debut, House of 1,000 Corpses (2003).

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Show Notes

Episode Synopsis

This week the Hack or Slash team explores the beginning of Rob Zombie’s film career by checking out his directorial debut, House of 1,000 Corpses (2003). The group debates the quality of Sheri Moon’s performance, examines its parallels with The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974), and discusses best fueling practices on road trips. This episode contains spoilers, beginning at 45:50.

Movie Details

IMDB

Title: "House of 1,000 Corpses"

Run time: 1h 29m

Release Date: April 11, 2003 (USA)


Mentioned in the Episode

Bella & Edythe - Lesbian Twilight

Rob Zombie's Great American Nightmare - Food Network


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Twitter Handles

Kris: @Rojawesome

Alexis: @HackorSlashLex

Ryan: @ryanfremeau

Mack: @mackorslash

Paris: @parisnicholson

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Music Credits

"Hack or Slash" by Daniel Stapleton

"The Dread" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)

Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

SPEAKER_04

Let's give them the old razzle dazzle. Greetings and salutations and welcome to Hacker Slash. If you're joining us again, welcome back. I can see by those fancy britches and sassy hairdos that you all ain't from around here. If this is your first time listening, welcome to the party. We are a horror movie review podcast dedicated to telling you whether a movie is a hack. A total joke, a waste of time, or a slash.

SPEAKER_09

Totally killer. Pun intended.

SPEAKER_04

We believe horror is for everyone, and as such, we're rating these movies with the perspective we've all gained from our varying walks of life and the flavors of fear we fancy most. My name is Chris, I'm your friendly neighborhood slasher enthusiast. This week I'm joined by the Superfly Space Guy Mac.

SPEAKER_09

How's 2021 going for you guys?

SPEAKER_04

The Gore Lover Alexis. Hey everyone. The Cowley Cooper Ryan. Hiya. And the Scream Queen Paris.

SPEAKER_07

Hey sweets.

SPEAKER_04

This week we're looking back at the film that started it all for none other than Rob Zombie himself. Before we get our hands dirty though, we have some follow-up.

SPEAKER_07

We do have some follow-up, Chris. We're actually going to be double dipping into the follow-up pool this week, because we have a little bit of catching up to do from the holidays. So, we recently reviewed a film called Puppet Master. If you guys recall, this was a movie where uh several psychics were called to a house to be murdered by puppets.

SPEAKER_04

How could anyone forget it's truly iconic?

SPEAKER_07

Well, honestly, yeah, I'm not so sure if these results are gonna surprise anyone else. So I was surprised to see that only 56% of our uh listeners gave it a hack while 44% gave it a slash. We have a comment from Troy on Instagram who said, The first Puppet Master has some genuinely creepy moments and had a nice doll's vibe. Heavily recommended if you have yet to see it. It gets a bit goofier as the series progresses, but who doesn't? And props to using Dan Mumford Draw's artwork, he's awesome. So Chris, I think that was a compliment to your selection in our graphic design this week.

SPEAKER_04

More compliments to the artist because that was far better than anything, any image you could pull from this movie. Yikes. He also has a lot of incredible prints from a lot of slasher movies, and they're all stunning.

SPEAKER_07

Well, we'll be sure to check those out. Um, I also feel like it's funny to say that this is a franchise that gets like goofier because I feel like it starts off in a very goofy place.

SPEAKER_03

I felt like it was um it was goofy in my opinion, but it also was trying to be serious. I don't think it was trying to be goofy at any point.

SPEAKER_07

Not even when the leech woman gagged out those leeches on that nipple.

SPEAKER_01

A little goofy. A little goofy.

SPEAKER_03

I don't know. I feel like there's a oh, I'm trying to be funny, but mostly I'm trying to show you these puppets that are like super serious.

SPEAKER_07

Well, when we watch the sequels, sometime in the future, we will all get to decide.

SPEAKER_03

Oh yeah, y'all know I will make you watch these along with Saw.

SPEAKER_07

Don't lump those two together.

SPEAKER_03

You're running out of saws for us to watch, to be honest. It's it's it's all random. It's not me picking movies.

SPEAKER_07

No, another movie that we reviewed recently was P2, the story of a voluptuous woman who gets chased around a parking garage.

SPEAKER_04

You mean buxom beauty?

SPEAKER_07

Buxom beauty, yeah. No, I was actually surprised by these results as well because 67% of our listeners gave that one a slash. They really liked it.

SPEAKER_04

It's generally a pretty good movie. I mean, it's not the most um original thing on earth, right? But it's certainly not Puppet Master.

SPEAKER_01

I really feel like the name of this movie really keeps it under the radar in a in a bad way. Like, why is it called P2? I mean, don't I know why it's called P2. It's just not a good choice for a name. I feel like more people would like this movie if it was called called what? Parking Garage. That sounds like a Parkinson Wreck rip-off. Yeah. It could be anything. This came out first. Parks and Wreck would be the ripoff. Come on. P2 is so bad. Nobody's gonna do it. Yeah, yes. Or that definitely eggplant, but go on.

SPEAKER_07

Oh, who doesn't love Wagmans? If you guys remember, we actually were talking about like what we use as self-defense when we walk into a creepy parking garage and we were really rep recommending hydro flasks. Um we have a comment from our friend Daniel, who's one of our patrons, who said, just to add on to the self-defense combo, I always carry a switchblade, pepper spray on my keychain, and a really loud emergency alarm.

SPEAKER_04

Daniel doesn't fuck around. No, he's ready. Someone's really prepared.

SPEAKER_09

That's hardcore, man. A switchblade and pepper spray.

SPEAKER_04

I feel safer with Daniel than most people I know.

SPEAKER_09

True. Proper Boy Scout. And that's our follow-up.

SPEAKER_04

Well, speaking of Boy Scouts, this week we're looking at Rob Zombie's directorial debut, a film which also saw the feature debut of his then girlfriend, Sherry Moon. This film follows the story of a group of kids on a road trip in Texas who encounter the misfortune of crossing paths with a crazed family hellbent on murder. Sound familiar? Ah, yeah, well, it should. Uh, but we're not talking about that movie. We're talking about the 2003 film, House of a Thousand Corpses. Who's seen this one before? Y'all know the vibes.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

You know I haven't seen this. Or even heard of it, really. However, I will say, this is my first Rob Zombie film. Ever? Ever really? His and mine, as it turns out. You've not seen Halloween. I have not seen the Rob Zombie Halloween because I like Chris.

SPEAKER_09

Love you. I've seen this a couple times. I saw it a couple years after it came out when it was available, I don't know, streaming DVD, Blu-ray, VHS, whatever it was in the mid-2000s that you could get.

SPEAKER_03

Well, I'm gonna tell you the short story of I actually got this movie at Blockbuster.

SPEAKER_06

Oh wow.

SPEAKER_03

Yes. So I literally had seen the cover of this movie like a million times and I was like, I need to see this shit. This is like right up my alley. And my parents went to like some party and I was like, yep. I don't even know how old I was. Enough to rent a rated R movie, but I don't think they cared back then.

SPEAKER_04

They didn't because by the time you're old enough to rent a rated R movie, I know for a fact there were no longer any blockbusters except for that one in Alaska.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, so I'm saying I might have been like 16 or 17. If that's pushing it, girl.

SPEAKER_04

I think like 13, 12, maybe. Yes.

SPEAKER_03

But I did get this at Blockbuster because I was like, oh my gosh, this is probably about to be the scariest thing I've ever seen in my entire life. And I like literally waited till my parents like went on some sort of like party. I don't even know what they did that night, but I got that and I got Willard, which is funny if you know what Willard is with the mice. Yeah, I got this and I was like, yep, I watched Rob Zombie first, this movie and watch Willard. I was like, Willard? Really?

SPEAKER_07

I'm pretty sure we also went to Willard from Blockbuster.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, that's funny. Willard was also directed by the director of the 2006 Black Christmas, so you were really setting yourself up there.

SPEAKER_06

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_03

I really was. Too bad I just saw Black Christmas this year. Not even. But yeah, clearly this holds a lot of like nostalgia for me. Like I just remember seeing this cover and being like, oh, this is intense. I have to see this. And it was honestly probably one of the besides all the movies I've seen with my abuela. Personally, something I've reached out to is probably one of the first five movies like in horror that I like reached out personally for myself and saw. I just wanted to shout out Abuela as always. Shout out to Miss Rodriguez.

SPEAKER_07

So this was a this was formative for Alexis.

SPEAKER_03

It kind of is, yeah. It's it's it's it's interesting, like that Rob Zombie isn't informative for me. If you know Alexis, this makes perfect sense.

SPEAKER_04

Yes, exactly.

SPEAKER_07

No, I actually uh watched this movie around the time that it came out, so probably like when I was in high school, um, and I never finished it. I don't know why that is, but I remember watching this movie today and I was like, oh, I've definitely seen this. And then it gets to a point where I was like, oh, I've never seen any of this, but I I've definitely seen the beginning, at least like I'd say the first 20 minutes or so before coming into this.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, that's fair. Was it a next Netflix and chill kind of night? Like maybe, or Blockbuster and Chill. In 2003? Blockbuster and chill.

SPEAKER_07

Oh, yeah, 2003. It was yeah, it was Blockbuster and Bang. I'm kidding. I was in high school.

SPEAKER_01

Blockbuster and bang.

SPEAKER_09

Wow. I was I was definitely an adult when Blockbuster was still around.

SPEAKER_01

No, no, no. I the I was at Blockbuster, but in 2003.

SPEAKER_04

I have not seen this one before. The first and only Rob Zombie film I've ever seen uh prior to this was his abysmal take on Halloween and Halloween 2. So naturally I was expecting uh more of the same. Uh I I don't even feel good saying that, but uh, I was expecting dudes with long scraggly hair and a lot of trashy dialogue and you got both. What were you expecting? Wait, sorry. So this was your first time watching this?

SPEAKER_01

This is my first time watching this.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, I didn't expect that at all for some reason.

SPEAKER_01

Well, nah, never mind. I don't know why I would want to watch this. No, I figured she had seen this first.

SPEAKER_04

If I had seen this and then I found out that Rob Zombie was directing Halloween, I would have avoided it, knowing, like, okay, this is the style that it's gonna be. I see. Although the trailers seemed a little misleading at the time. But if you watch Halloween and you know that everybody's saying, Oh, this is Rob Zombie style. Okay, cool. Long scraggly hair and vulgarity and trashy dialogue. Dope. Got it. I'm in for a ride. Right on my alley.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. Well, since I hadn't seen Halloween, I had no idea what to expect from Rob Zombie. Um for me, I went in, like all Ella really had was the art, right, for this movie, which is very throwback. Um, so I'm expecting like an 80s feeling movie, pretty much a uh a big kill count, right? A lot of bodies. I mean, a house of a thousand corpses, you know, gotta have some deaths there. There better be at least 900.

SPEAKER_04

At least.

SPEAKER_01

At least, you know. Um, the other thing I was expecting for some reason was some sort of like occult Satanism type of thing. I don't know why. You kind of get that.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, that's joke. I mean, you get a lot. You get a lot, but if if you want to keep watching this series, you get more of it.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. I don't think we'll tease it. You know, but yeah, I for some reason that's what I drew um before I went into this. And who was that surprised?

SPEAKER_07

I did a similar thing, Ryan. I was like, okay, this is called House of a Thousand Corpses. One, I'm pretty sure this is a remake. Turns out it's not. Um, but I was also like, okay, like a house with like bodies on the walls or something like that, the most literal thing you could think of.

SPEAKER_01

So imaginative.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah, like when they go in the basement in Jeepers Creepers. That's that's what I was expecting.

SPEAKER_04

I mean, that would have been better. I want to see a house built out of a thousand corpses, if that's the title we're gonna have. That's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_07

Yes, and then we can move into it. But I was also thinking, like, uh this might also be the first Rob Zombie movie I've ever seen, because the only real thing I think of when I think of Rob Zombie is like he did the soundtrack to one of the Twisted Metal games, uh, which we've talked about on the podcast before. But I'm pretty sure I know like an entire album of his just from playing that video game. So I also didn't know what to expect. It was very gross.

SPEAKER_04

And I will say, I know I give the Halloween movies a lot of shit, and and as such, I drew I avoid any Rob Zombie movie, but I will say I did see a appearance he had on Cake Wars, and he seemed like a real chill dude, seems like a good human. It was a great episode of Cake Wars. Can you drop that in the show notes? Because I want to watch that.

SPEAKER_07

I know, I'm interested.

SPEAKER_04

I will for sure do my best to find it, but he was like a guest judge. It may have been Cupcake Wars. Cupcake Wars, I think, is what it was. It's like a food network thing. Rob Zombie does a lot of stuff.

SPEAKER_01

Like, I have listened to a few podcasts with him, and he doesn't necessarily seem like this person.

SPEAKER_03

But I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. I like when I first like saw this cover, like I already talked about it, but I expected utter chaos. Utter chaos. And like for the first for the for my first watch. But like this time, like I was like, what are my expectations? I was expecting the same feeling, but I kind of got a different feeling. I kind of was like, Oh, this is interesting. This is Rob Zombie style. We're gonna tell you what it is, and we're gonna keep telling you, then we're gonna actually throw a throwback in there and tell you again. But my thing is, my expectation for this movie, I'm gonna throw in. I figured everyone's gonna hack this movie except for Paris. And I know I'm going a little bit, that was my expectation for this movie's like score. Score. Yeah.

SPEAKER_07

We shall see.

SPEAKER_03

We'll see how it goes. Well, that's a pessimistic. I just knew what kind of style it was, and I know everyone's like kind of no offense, straight laced about some gore stuff. Straight lace. But I know Paris is just like out there, yeah.

SPEAKER_04

We're straight laced. Let's go back to the hot dog style terror fire cut. I was all about that shit, as creepy as it was.

SPEAKER_07

You know, some of us here are pretty straight laced.

SPEAKER_01

I was not about that. I guess I am straight laced. I'll be the boring one.

SPEAKER_04

Well, here's here's the real burning question. How are you guys feeling while you're experiencing the House of a Thousand Corpses?

SPEAKER_07

Um, I personally felt confused. Uh during the whole intro. I was like, what am I watching? What is this? I couldn't really understand what tone they were going for at that point. And I think that may be why I never finished it when I watched it years ago. Yeah. Because the beginning's weird.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, it's a really wacky vibe, which I wasn't necessarily expecting um the first time around. And honestly, the second, or not even the second time, I've watched this probably like four or five times, but this being my most recent watch, I wasn't expecting that either. I I swear it was more of a serious tone, and I still didn't get that. Like I still got kind of this wacky vibe.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I'm kind of on the same page as Paris. I felt truly so lost during so much of this movie. And and it's not like I can't understand what happened in the movie. Like the plot, generally speaking, it's very simple, you know, people are taken by other people. You know, we've seen lots of movies where that happens, but like the way things happen in this movie and why they happen is it just it just fully escaped me. And you know, sometimes people have styles, and just because you have a style doesn't mean it's a good style. And I can see the style, I get it. And I I can't even imagine how this type of style fits into Halloween. So I don't even know if it's a sty it, it doesn't fit into Halloween, though.

SPEAKER_03

No, I mean I mean he directed us this is his debut. If you're gonna be something, like, why don't you be like 100% you? No, no, no.

SPEAKER_01

I And then be like, let me hold back on myself a little. Listen, listen, let me be clear here. I fully agree you should be you. I support everyone doing them, you know? Like, even if everybody ain't down for it, you should definitely be you. But sometimes a style is objectively much. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

Or not for everyone.

SPEAKER_01

I don't know. Just like a lot. And so anyway, the general word here for me is just lost. Like what? I said a lot of what in this movie.

SPEAKER_09

But I when I was going back to, you know, watch this for however many times I've seen it, I don't even know. But I like remembered, you know, gore, I remembered kind of insanity. What I didn't remember, and like what caught me off guard was like how much he was attempting to be like art house with it with a lot of the sequences. And that I like did not remember whatsoever. Um so what I'm watching, I was just like caught off guard and I kept focusing on those those like small scenes or uh little segments, and I was just like, what? Like if you cut that out, that would be a completely different experience for for me, like a standard, you know, lost in the middle of nowhere kind of tale. But that part I was just like, I don't is this I don't understand, maybe, but that I I wasn't confused about the story or what was going on necessarily, but I was kind of confused about some of the choices made during the filming while I was watching it.

SPEAKER_01

I agree with you, and what you're saying about those cutaways is one of the things that made me like lost.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah, I feel like it did get like abstract at times, and you were kind of like, huh?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I mean that's fair. I think the only time I've seen this in a movie and it be done well is Sinister, and I wasn't super crazy about that movie, but it's like, yeah, these are like little snuff films interlaced with the rest of the movie. So it's definitely a style, it's definitely an approach. And I'll say that the first time this is a tale of pain for me. I tried watching this the other night, and I only got three minutes in before the dialogue annoyed the shit out of me, and I turned it off.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah, they hit you pretty hard pretty quick with a couple words we don't say anymore.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, it was just it was too much too soon. This was just a lot happening. I pushed through it on my second attempt, and I found myself actually entertained throughout a lot of this movie. I'm sorry, what? Yeah, I know. I think that feeling of amusement though, uh was in large part due to a couple members of the cast that were a very pleasant surprise for me, a very pleasant surprise. I enjoyed Rain Wilson in here, right? Shout out to your boy Dwight from The Office. And it was good to see Erin Daniels in here. Last time I saw her, she was on the L word, so you know, it's some good folks in here. And I was also really surprised how much I enjoyed. And I feel like this is weird and off-brand for me to say. I feel like I was also really surprised how much I enjoyed Captain Spaulding.

SPEAKER_09

Yep, so good. That is a surprise to me. You know, Chris, that's one of the things that that surprised me was the cast going into this. I completely forgot that Rain Wilson was in this. And so when we get into the early part of the movie, I was like, oh, what? What's happening? This is cool, seeing seeing him as like a nice like you know, turn of events. But yeah, the the cast was really, I think, a good part of of the movie. And I had no idea, like going back to my memories, I just remembered, you know, crazy stuff is happening. There's some gore and some weirdness, and then I'm like looking through the IMDB page, going like, holy cow, there's actually a lot of like good people in this.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, you got your dude from The Walking Dead.

SPEAKER_09

But you're talking about the talking dead guy, Chris Hardwick?

SPEAKER_03

Yes, he's in this, and you don't even recognize him.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, he looks so different, but most importantly, Dwight, and he doesn't talk about beats.

SPEAKER_09

You know, or bears, or Battlestar Galactica.

SPEAKER_03

Like Mac, I didn't realize how much these like little interjections from Zom Rob Zombies, like, you know, these flashbacks or like kind of these like interjections were in this entire movie. Like, I I don't recall watching this the first time that it was that, and it kind of just caught me off guard. And honestly, it was kind of like honestly, kind of a disappointment for me because it threw me off guard. Like, it's like, hey, like instead of developing these people's backstories, you're giving me these like side notes and these side stories and these like scenes where it's like, oh ha ha, like here you go. This actually this this is what I just told you is a joke. This person likes necrophilia, like, here we go. Like, you know, and I'm like, okay, I could have got that without you throwing it in my face.

SPEAKER_01

It's like side scenes that don't add to it. Because if you I mean, if you tell me a movie has a bunch of side scenes about the characters, like that sounds great. And make them consistent, like, don't make them different, yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Like make them all consistent. Like maybe there's found footage that they found that they were interjecting into the movie, and make them have like value where you like care about it rather than this.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Anyway. I feel like Rob Zombie was in the post-production process of this, looking at this, like, let's give them the old razzle dazzle, and just fucking do whatever he could to spice anything up, and it was just all haphazard and uncoordinated.

SPEAKER_03

I'm pretty sure he was just and was like, you know, I want to put this like rocker style, like freaking almost like a music video at times. I think it's harder drugs. Okay, it's harder drugs.

SPEAKER_09

I think the point is that those those little segments were friction and really slowed you down.

SPEAKER_03

Like I will get one or two, but the fact that there I got multiple, and I was like, okay, this needs to be incorporated in into a bigger story, like we've seen in other movies where it's like, hey, we actually found this found footage, but this is also something this is a story, but this is found footage we found, and it kind of like meshed a little bit together. This was like, hey, let me give you this, like I don't know, it reminded me of like I some like Nickelodeon show I watched where it was like, here, let me show you this side thing, like I don't know, Ren and Stimpy or something. Or I'm trying to think of like other movies you watched, or like on Cartoon Network where you've watched it you you're watching a show, then it has a you think it's a commercial, but it's actually the still the show.

SPEAKER_04

I got it. I got it. You ready for this show?

SPEAKER_03

Yes, yes. Beavis and butthead. Yeah, yes, 100%. Yes, which maybe he got his um influence from.

SPEAKER_07

I was also pretty surprised by like uh a lot of the the art the artistic choices that were made. Um, similar to what you guys are describing, it felt to me like he had like a bunch of footage from like other stuff that never like became anything and just kind of threw it in there for for filler because it was like generic, spooky content that didn't actually drive the story forward or for me add much uh value.

SPEAKER_01

A lot of it was like what you would use for the title sequence of a scary movie, right? Like these little like scenes, you know the title. Yeah, but the title sequence is always like, you know, a pic a video of like a nail being pulled off and it's just gross. It's like that type of stuff where you're just like, okay, this is not, you know, this isn't valuable. I don't know like what's it doesn't do anything for me. Yeah. That's you know.

SPEAKER_04

Here's the here's the the shitty part though. I promise you it was intentional because he actually filmed this shit in his basement, very aware of what he was doing and what he was doing to add to the story. But it doesn't come across that way.

SPEAKER_01

I I definitely believe it was intentional, but I think it's one of those things where like the desire to be different sometimes takes you too far. Especially with art things. I don't know.

SPEAKER_03

I kinda like it. Like you know what it reminds me of? It's a cro it's across from Voyeurism and Betty Page. Like, I don't know. I get just I get and they kind of might go one like they might go together, actually. Okay, that's what it reminded me of. Pinch at least the big like the beginning sequence when you're getting all that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_09

I will say the title sequence was done better in True Blood. I want to do bad things to you. That one.

SPEAKER_04

I actually did enjoy the opening of like the Dr. Wolfenstein. I like that. I enjoy that a lot. It reminded me of the monsters.

SPEAKER_07

I saw that and I was worried. I was like, I hope this isn't it.

SPEAKER_04

It did feel like it. Uh it also reminded me of Fright Knight.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah, it reminded me of Fright Night too. I was like, please don't let this be a character that comes in later and doesn't outcome.

SPEAKER_04

Again, Paris and I are such polar opposites. We see the same thing. We are reminded of the same thing and just are on opposite ends of the spectrum of the feelings of those things.

SPEAKER_01

That's so funny. It's funny because for a second I was reminded of Creep Show.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah, that too.

SPEAKER_01

Not that it like looked like it, but I was I was like, are we gonna get like a cool no anthology?

SPEAKER_04

A house of a thousand corpses, because really it's a house that has a library with a lot of books that are horror books. Lots of books. It would be perfect.

SPEAKER_03

Sounds like a better movie. Hey, hey, hey. I don't know. The the see like the Dr. Volstein, I don't know. All of those things were kind of actually scary to me. Like, I wasn't necessarily frightened of this movie per se. Like I totally um being honest with our listeners, I live by myself right now. Probably being push shouldn't put that out to everyone, but I do. Nobody knows where you live. It's okay, so it doesn't matter, but I live by myself now, and it's like a very different vibe because my whole life I've lived with someone. So like parents, roommates, boyfriends, significant others, whatever you want to call them, more like roommates. But my thing is like now, like I so I wasn't scared of it that way, but like honestly, like some of the visuals we get, and I'll talk about this in the second half, but like the visuals we get like are kind of frightening to me. And I know watching this the first time, I was like, it wasn't as scary as I thought it'd be, but it was definitely very frightening visually, like to have this sort of like element that I'm like I've never seen something like that before, and that's fucking terrifying. Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. I think for me, the feeling that I have from it is like there are some like creepy behaviors and things, and like visually, some things are creepy in this movie, but it doesn't scare me. Oh no. Because hopefully these people don't exist.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I just find it gross.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, it's gross. Okay, Chris and Ryan seem like the perfect people to go on a road trip, and they're like, let's stop at this random ass, like amusement thing. Oh, I would. Yeah, exactly. Oh, I would not. This doesn't terrify you guys, like not terrifying but scare you a little bit.

SPEAKER_07

I think it was a bad idea that they did this. So I would not support this if it was real life.

SPEAKER_01

No one's going into it. Alexis, I have to tell you, I am the least fun person because I get really stressed out on road trips. And so I'm not trying to stop anywhere and also I've seen too many of these movies. And so, like, I'm not down to stop and explore, and like it's not gonna be like, hey, let's stop at this gas station and uh let me know if it's cool in there so we can wake the girls up and go inside. Like, no, no, no, no, no. Like, you go in, get a water or pay at the pump and let's go. Like, I got places to push it.

SPEAKER_04

So here's the thing, right? Back when we covered the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, we had a whole debate about would you or should you stop at like the roadside shacks that have barbecue? And it's a big fuck no for me, right? It's a big no.

SPEAKER_07

Oh, but the barbecue.

SPEAKER_04

Uh I don't stop at any gas stations that aren't like a chain that is part of like a formal rest stop. However, I would be the person to go on a road trip looking for spooky shit in a state, so I absolutely support their goals. I just don't support going to a place that gives you complimentary chicken from behind a gas station counter. That was sick. I was like, where's they get where are they getting this chicken from?

SPEAKER_01

Just pulling it out of nowhere. It's not chicken. I was once lost, not lost. I was once in the hills, mountains of Tennessee, riding home and uh driving a car that wasn't mine, it was a rental, and ended up about to run out of gas at the basically the top of a mountain, which is basically where there are not gas stations. And we stopped at one, we found one that was two miles before we were gonna be on E. And it was exactly what you would expect on the side of a mountain in the middle of nowhere in Tennessee. It was just like one pump, one building on the side of you know, a uh steep incline going downwards nearby. Very sketchy, no one's around. And the only time I've stopped at a sketchy gas station like that, someone pulled up to next to us, started asking us a bunch of questions, things got really weird, and we had to dip out. Got our gas and ran. Girl, I need to teach you how to road trip. I'm just saying, no, no, no. We had a great time. It was great. We just didn't prepare our gas for the mountains. But yeah, that's not road tripping efficiently. One sketchy gas station my whole life, and it was very creepy and could have easily turned into one of these movies. So I'm good.

SPEAKER_09

Okay, so first of all, why does nobody fill up when they're halfway through their tank?

SPEAKER_01

It's because we didn't know where we were going and didn't know we were gonna be running out of gas. I go down to a quarter.

SPEAKER_09

But you but you see that it's halfway and you go, Oh, now we should find a gas station.

SPEAKER_01

Here's the thing about Tennessee. We were in the middle of nowhere when we left where we were. And so, like, it's not like we had an option, and then all of a sudden we were like, uh, we're in the mountains.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, no. I I if I hit half of my tank, I am monitoring what the conditions are and I'm paying attention to mileage between gas stations, but I don't stop to fill up until it's a quarter. Filling up every half tank is so excessive and adds so much time that seems unnecessary. When you drive a Honda and your tank is 10 gallons, yeah, not doing that.

SPEAKER_09

Yeah, I have I have 14 gallons, so a little bit, just a little bit more.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, you're cool. Yes, say I might be the person that does.

SPEAKER_09

I respect that.

SPEAKER_03

Have a tank, yeah.

SPEAKER_09

I could see Chris having the entire trip planned out with a spreadsheet with like lists of of exact places to stop and when you should stop there and where you need to get gas.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, that's uh growing up in the household that I did, where if my mother finds out you're going on a road trip, she's gonna tell you which route route are you gonna take? You gotta take 75 all the way up north. Or you can take the turnpike and hit it exactly this point. I'm like, Ma, I want to listen to the fucking GPS. I'm not gonna remember any of this.

SPEAKER_01

But what you have to have is a parent that says, Have you checked your tires before you leave for a road trip? Because it's always a thing.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, my mom does that. She also just like took a look at my brake fluid yesterday, just because I mean, I'm not going anywhere. It's sitting there.

SPEAKER_09

But I was gonna say, not just your tires. When you go on a road trip, you have to check all the fluids.

SPEAKER_01

It's because you're a dad.

SPEAKER_09

I'm not a dad, but that's what I've learned from my family. All I'm learning is that I know nothing about cars. You have to go out there and you gotta check your oil, you gotta check your coolant, gotta make sure you're ready to go before you actually go. And then you have to go to the gas station, not just to fill up, but to get road snacks and stuff too.

SPEAKER_01

So, Mac, what's scarier? This movie or gas stations?

SPEAKER_09

Neither of them scare me. Uh, this one's not necessarily scary, it's grotesque. Ooh, that's such a good word.

SPEAKER_04

I think it's too much of a compliment.

SPEAKER_09

Well, per perhaps. Um there's a there's a particular thing in here that's grotesque.

SPEAKER_04

We were trying to be gross.

SPEAKER_09

Yeah, I mean, I know I I can see where they're going for. If you listen to like Rob Zombie's music, you can you can get the feeling that they want to convey. That, you know, he's he's making this movie and he wants to like translate some of like his mental imagery onto film. Um and part of that is like grotesqueries, like I get it, but it's not scary. You don't get jump scares, you don't get suspense, honestly. You just get this kind of subdued feeling that he's trying to to give you.

SPEAKER_04

There is one moment that I found was a good horror movie moment.

SPEAKER_07

I wasn't really scared during most of this, uh, especially towards the beginning. I was more like, what is this? Is this even a horror movie? Uh, but as the movie progressed, there were certain uh characters that were introduced later on, and some of their designs I thought were like very creepy and scary and very well done. And I was like, oh, this was unexpected, um, but for the most part, not very scary.

SPEAKER_04

I think where I struggle and why it's not scary for me is because it is wholly unoriginal. And it is beat for beat, just it's a an amalgamation of so many uh the intense 70s horror movies that that we see, right? And it's taking the Texas Chainsaw Massacre and combining it with the idea of like culty worship, and uh you can sit here beat for beat and just be like, Oh, okay, as soon as you see a a specific plot point in this movie, you're like, okay, shit, this is how it's gonna go down, this is how this movie's gonna end. And it doesn't it doesn't stray from that at all. It's it was honestly that's when it stopped being entertaining for me.

SPEAKER_03

I don't know. I I I can see where you're coming from where there's um all these elements of this movie that aren't necessarily original, but I think when they all come together, they are kind of original, quirky and wacky, and I appreciate that.

SPEAKER_01

See, I'm kind of on Chris's thought process here. I think I haven't seen the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre, so that isn't what it brought to mind, but what it brought to mind for me was the original Hills Have Eyes, which you know, same, same but different. And for me, this movie is like um Hills Have Eyes did a collab with like Marilyn Manson in a weird way.

SPEAKER_04

I feel that feels very right.

SPEAKER_01

It's it that's what it feels like for me. So yeah, I I have to agree. I don't feel like the originality, although I can see the original aspects of it. Um I I do think Rob Zombie tried to do things differently than what we normally see in movies. Sometimes maybe, maybe not good, maybe good. I don't know. That's up to you. But uh I can see some bits, but I think overall the story feels very familiar.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I think for me, Captain Spaulding was like the peak of originality, and everything else was just I'm gonna add a fuck here and a fuck there and a fuck here and there, and then uh, you know what? We're gonna cut somebody up and make them make them an animal, and that's about it. That's it.

SPEAKER_09

I think original is probably the wrong word. Um, you know, this this house uh pays homage to horror movies that came before it. Obviously, um The Hills Have Eyes, obviously Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Um, but it it's like filtered through Rob Zombie's mind. Um, you know, sometimes filtering is a good thing, like when you have that milk left over after eating cereal. Um that that's not original, but that milk is delicious, and people go after that, and you try to use that to bake things, and it's successful. Has its own unique taste, right? You guys not like cereal milk? It's better than a cereal sometimes.

SPEAKER_04

No, and I I get that. I don't put milk in my cereal.

unknown

Right.

SPEAKER_04

It's just a very intense psychopath way to say the word filter.

SPEAKER_09

You know, that's a good filter, cereal, which is sugary and delicious. Um, but yeah, I mean this one, it's not original. It's like we're getting the feeling that Rob Zombie had when he watched those movies. And I don't know that that's necessarily a good thing, but it's definitely not, it's not original.

SPEAKER_07

I feel that deeply. Um, do you all ever watch those videos on YouTube where it'll be like an AMV where like somebody like takes clips from a show and then mashes them up together with a song they like and makes like a fake music video? That's what it felt like Rob Zombie did with like all of the horror movies we just mentioned. It was like his fan video of like horror.

SPEAKER_03

That's kind of real. I get upset at those because I think they're real sometimes, especially when they're like trailers for movies. And I was like, Is this a new movie?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, it's not. There's an excellent one that takes uh footage from Twilight and to takes footage from some other fucking vampire show that I'm unfamiliar with, and it replaces Edward Cullen with Ed with Edith Cullen, so it's like lesbian Twilight.

SPEAKER_07

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_04

That was a great example of a successful video of that.

SPEAKER_07

Send that to the group chat.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, I will.

SPEAKER_09

Put that in the show notes. Speaking of speaking of originality, whether good or bad, um I kind of feel that the ending seemed pretty satisfactory right up until the last moment, and at which point I found it to be dip like disappointing.

SPEAKER_01

I mean, for me, the ending is exactly what I expected. Not one note off of it. The whole third act really fell apart for me.

SPEAKER_07

Really?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, yeah. It was it was so there's a point where like shit hits the fan and it's cool, but then things just kind of like drag on. But the the ending for me just feels very derivative. It's feels very like, oh, I've seen this a hundred times before, unimpressed. And I've seen it a hundred times in movies that came before it, not just movies that came after it.

SPEAKER_07

Wow. I guess I'm here once again to say the complete opposite of Chris, and I felt the third act was my favorite part. I feel like that's where a lot of things that I like really picked up, and I wish more of the movie was like that part.

SPEAKER_03

I did like the third act. Like I feel like you get to see the characters a little bit more, and you get to see the um set, which honestly is my favorite. And you I I don't know. I think it's just it goes with this wacky thing, but you're not getting the wackiness of these, like you know, side rough cut footage. You're just getting the raw data. Not the raw data. You're in the raw scenes of what this is, like how fucked up this family is.

SPEAKER_01

It's like what feels more familiar, like a like a familiar horror movie. Is like the third act feels more normal.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, it it it really does because you're not flipping between two things. You're not you're you're staying consistent with one mom, like one motive, one motto, like one like end goal, which I I I truly do. I I like the ending of this movie. I there's nothing like I don't know, we go, is this the end and is this the end? Um, I wish I didn't give too much. I wish it didn't. I have nothing to say too much. And it's like it was satisfactory to me where I don't have any complaints about it. Interesting.

SPEAKER_07

Did anybody else, when it got toward the end, hear Mac's voice say, In this, the House of a Thousand Corpses? Because that's all I heard.

SPEAKER_03

You mean he wasn't doing the intro to this movie? What?

SPEAKER_09

How will I ever escape this house of a thousand corpses? Exactly.

SPEAKER_04

It would have been better if that happened. That's totally fair, Alexis. I mean, raw can be good, right? Like raw, gritty, you're like in the style, it's fine. Sushi, raw. Love it. This feels like raw eggs where you can't really ingest it without it being mixed or cooked with something else. We're gonna keep things cooking along here, so no more raw material. Let's go ahead and start making our way into our ratings. Now, obviously, it's the house of a thousand corpses. I think it may have been better if there were actually a thousand visible corpses, but Alexis, what's our body count?

SPEAKER_03

There may have been a thousand corpses, uh, if you're considering a few scenes, but unfortunately, there's only 15 people that logically died in this movie.

SPEAKER_07

Only 15? That's still a very high number. That's a lot of dead bitches.

SPEAKER_01

And Ryan, how about that animal report? Yeah, uh honestly, most surprising part of this movie, the animal report's fine. That's really surprising. Truly surprising. When you see it, you're uh it's I had to like think back. I was like, am I missing something? Because it just seems like something that they would do. But Rob Zombie likes dogs, evidently, so we're good.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, we're pretty chill. That's fine. Let's go ahead and start getting into the actual scoring of this film, House of a Thousand Corpses in 2003, Rob Zombie's directorial debut. Was it a hacker or slash?

SPEAKER_09

Okay, I'll go first. Everyone's gonna be thoughtful. But in the end, you know, we had a pretty good cast and we had some intense grotesqueness, you know, especially dealing with all the antagonists, the several antagonists that we had in the film. But that doesn't make up for what seems to be a pointless tale of torture and suffering chopped up with an attempted arthouse zest. Well, there it is. So it's a slash Mac? No, that means it's a hack.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, interesting. Because I like the pointless gore. I like the pointless, crude comments. I I you everyone knows that's my thing. If you haven't been listening to this for over a year and a half, you clearly don't know me. But I will give you a uh lesson in Alexis. This is my shit. Um, yes, it is. I will admit watching a second time, I do have a few points that I'm not necessarily fond of watching it again. But honestly, like if I said this is my top 10, I would not. But if I said it was in my top 15, very narrow margin there. It's only but five movies, but I think like your top 10 are like soul, like in your soul. Your top 15 are like the other five are not in your soul, but they're like movies that you go to. Like, they're I don't know. Oh girl, I don't know.

SPEAKER_04

I got like top three in my soul, and everything else is like okay.

SPEAKER_03

Well, I got 10. I have a question. I have a big soul.

SPEAKER_09

Nine of the ten are they saw movies? Mostly.

SPEAKER_03

But this is like, I I think because I have a lot of background with this, and like, you know, this is like the movie I grabbed off a shelf, which one you don't even do anymore. So I think there's a like a lot of nostalgia with this. So I I clearly have to give this a slash. Um, although this might everyone might have their differing opinions. I don't know. I think it's like a very Alexis movie.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, for sure. Although I'm a little sad it's it's definitely not gonna be a universal hack now because it would have been so fun to say the house of a thousand corpses is now a house of a thousand hacks.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, wow.

SPEAKER_04

But that's not that's not our destiny tonight. You knew that wasn't gonna happen.

SPEAKER_01

So for sure. If we can get enough people to vote on our Twitter and call this a hack, we can't have wait, you cannot have a hack and just like my flash doesn't count.

SPEAKER_04

Okay. Oh, it it all it always counts. It's always there. It'll be a thousand hacks. It's a house of a thousand hacks and one slash and one slash.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, okay, I get it. I get that. Get a thousand, get a thousand hacks. Okay, this will be the thing on Twitter. If this can get a thousand hacks, and I'll do my best.

SPEAKER_01

I feel like it'll take bribery, but I'll see what I can do. So, just for the fun of it here, a lesson in Ryan since we had an a lesson in Alexis, is that I don't even have a top three in my soul. There is nothing, there are no movies in my life. You don't have a top three horror movies or movies? I don't have a top three anything. I don't even have a top one movie. I don't even have a favorite movie. Do you have a top three friends? It uh not really.

SPEAKER_05

Oh interesting.

SPEAKER_01

Damn, I'm kind of hurt. Don't be hurt. It's nothing personal. That's the best part. It there's nothing personal.

SPEAKER_04

You kind of do though, because you have pin messages on your iPhone.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, but it doesn't mind it's only based on frequency. That's it. So here are the things I feel about this movie. Very lost in the over artsiness of this, especially like in the beginning and middle. The ending, you kind of lose that a little bit. It kind of gets to, like I said, feel a little bit more familiar. But the the the the force of the artsiness, it just didn't do it for me at all. Um I think the graphic characters and like I just I just didn't find myself attached to any part of this at all, including like the victims and the perpetrators. Like, I just it just didn't bring me into anything. I don't I don't feel like I cared about anyone in this movie, maybe at all. I don't know if this is something that I have heard before, but I have this feeling that a big part of this movie was made because Rob Zombie wanted to make these effects happen. Like, I think he's pretty well known for having very intense effects.

SPEAKER_09

He's got his grittiness going on.

SPEAKER_01

Got a grittiness, but it just feels like Rob Zombie was like, dude, I really want to build a room that's like just covered in bones. And and it seems like he did that for every single part of this. Like, yeah, but he's not the first person to do that. Sure, no, he's definitely not. But it he did every single idea he's ever had in his entire life in this one movie.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, Ryan, make a horror movie, and I want to see that.

SPEAKER_01

I feel like it would be really simple, but uh that's listen, I'm not trying to say I can make a better movie than him at all.

SPEAKER_03

Sorry.

SPEAKER_01

It's not the worst movie I've ever seen, right? It it was just a little bit too much for me, and it's so funny because I don't think of myself as a very like gentle person, but this movie made me feel so overwhelmed. It was like, there's just so much. It's it's like so intense um in in many different ways, not just in like it's not just intense core, right? It's intense filming, um, it's intense characters, it's intense themes, like there's just a lot happening. Um and I just felt lost pretty much in the whole thing. I didn't feel like I was along for the ride. I felt like the train was roll going on without me, and I was just trying to hold on. Um, so it's a hack for me. I feel like that was predictable. Mac was actually the only one I wasn't sure about, and so now I do feel confident that your prediction was right, Alexis.

SPEAKER_07

So I watched this movie in part years ago, um, and I never finished it. And that was partially because like the beginning has these like really gross characters that are both obnoxious and like like not not well kept, let's say that. Um, and I don't like things like that. Uh so I got over that part and I like got into the rest of the movie, and it was a lot more of that. It was just like really gross people. Um I will say I liked like a good backwoods Barbie moment. I loved like the fried blonde wigs that we had throughout. Um, but ultimately this movie was just kind of like dumb and bad. I feel bad for hacking this since I I'm not sure why I would have slashed this. I would love to hear your theory behind that, Alexa.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, because I thought you were gonna slash it. That's why.

SPEAKER_07

Well, here's the thing. At the end, like like I was saying, the third act, I thought that movie got very good. Captain Spaulding. If we get rid of that whole thing and like that whole truck stop area, maybe this could be a movie that I would slash. But like ultimately, until we got to the end and we started like getting into like our final girl moments and seeing some of the characters that are teased throughout the whole movie, I wasn't really into it. And then I got those parts and I was like, ooh, I'm into this. Let's do more of this. Oh, there's the credits rolling, and it's a a song with just a girl sex moaning. Okay. So this is getting a hack from me.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, I'll keep this relatively brief. Obviously, Rob Zombie did not make a great impression on me with what he did to Halloween, so uh my expectations for this movie were super low. Uh yet somehow he did manage to surpass them. Which I feel like is saying a lot. Once I got past the first three minutes, I was actually entertained and it was shocking, and this is actually slash material.

SPEAKER_03

Oh my god! I live material.

SPEAKER_07

Or are you slashing it?

SPEAKER_04

No, she didn't give it a slash. Hold on. The problem is it didn't stay that way.

SPEAKER_07

There it is.

SPEAKER_04

So whereas Paris only wanted to cut out everything from the gas station, Captain Spaulding, I wanted to keep only that part. And like maybe when shit hits the fan, we get like to a very climactic point where people are endangered because the last however long of this movie feels like it lasts an eternity. It it just feels dragged out and the pacing feels really inconsistent and it doesn't match the tone of the rest of the movie for me. So I became super disinterested really fast. And then at the end, we just get a rinse repeat from another classic film. And is it had potential, it could have been doing its thing, and there are things that I do like about it, but it's still solidly a hack because this style of horror is just not for me. I will watch this again before I watch the 2006 Black Christmas remake. Alright, I'll take that. It's a very passive-aggressive compliment. And with that, House of a Thousand Corpses is a house of four hacks and one slash tonight. Now you can find this movie free just about anywhere. It's a streaming on AMC Plus, it's streaming on Tube. That should tell you enough that you can get this for free anywhere. But check it out, join us in the second half so we can break it down together. See you in a bit.

SPEAKER_08

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SPEAKER_04

Welcome back, folks. You are now entering the spoiler zone for House of a Thousand Corpses, which has earned four hacks and one slash, contrary to Alexis's prediction. Now we have a lot to unpack here. Before we get into the grittiness and all the reasons why this movie is totally unoriginal. Alexis, what's up with the Gore Score? I'll pretend like you never said that, Chris. Oh, I'm gonna revisit again in a second, so don't worry. You can forget for now, but it's coming back later.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, I'll forget for a second. So obviously, Rob Zombies directoral debut. So it's gonna be graphic. It's gonna be gory, and I'm glad it delivered. Like it's not on a like saw or hot dog level. I think we that's our standards now here at Hackerslash. Um so it's not necessarily a like that sort of level. I think like some of the language they use, some of like you you seen this gore. Like it's it's not unusual, but it's the humor, unfortunately, that they use, which I know Chris wasn't a fan of. I fucking was a fan of. Um, but like I don't know, it's crude. It's crude, so is the gore. So but yeah, it was it this movie was pretty gory for what it does, and not necessarily it's crazy, it's just encompassing of all of the movie, not just the um body count per se.

SPEAKER_04

To be fair, I was a fan of some parts of the humor. I thought Kathan Spawning was fucking hilarious after you got past the first three minutes. That's funny because I love the first three minutes, but it's okay.

SPEAKER_03

Like, clearly, we've decided that I'm not matching up on anyone on this movie. But you know, it's pretty cool because you're looking at these. I know we talked about these artsy like cuts, which are these like rough cuts that uh Ram Zobby put in the movie. Well, we talk about baby Firefly, which is Sherry Moon. So actually, those are supposed to be like more necrophilic tendencies, and um the scene where she's like kissing that skeleton and like touching your breast. Well, that was supposed to go even more hard where she's having like an orgasm and climacting through this. Well, that's a Rob Zombie film. Glad that didn't happen. I mean, nothing better than like, you know, just throwing your wife in this and be like, yo, do this.

SPEAKER_04

Throwing your girlfriend in this at the time, right? Like they they weren't even married yet. She didn't have to commit to this guy.

SPEAKER_07

That's actually so crazy.

SPEAKER_01

No, but she's she's dating Rob Zombie, right? You you agree to sort of think you do.

SPEAKER_04

Very supportive woman.

SPEAKER_03

I I like her in this movie.

SPEAKER_04

I do want to say that it just tracks because he does have a written piece of dialogue in the 2007 Halloween remake that alludes to skull fucking. So it makes sense.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, I I'm not gonna act like I've never heard that term before, but I can call. I don't know what sense I have, but like it's funny because there's actually like essentially like Rob Zombie was filming two versions of this movie. So there's like this gory version, and then there's this version that like Universal wanted to have. And like, for instance, there's this shot where the robber in the beginning um he stabbed with the axe on the floor and was shot in two ways. Well, the there's one a version with blood, and there's a version without blood. Um, several several scenes were actually shot um involving the lighting, and there's this red lighting, and you know, it's crazy how just lighting can affect sort of that sort of thing. And you know, when you're using the final cut, it's clearly with white lighting and less gore. But essentially, if you use red lighting, it's gorier, which everything seems creepier. Yeah, there you go. I love the gore in this movie. It's truly what attracted me to this movie. I was like, oh, this is about to be super gory, but essentially it wasn't as gory as I thought it would be. Like it's you you see some things, but you don't see a lot. I don't know, there's a lot of oozing, there's a lot of blood, there's just I don't know. My favorite thing is Otis wearing the dad's skin. Like, it wasn't a kill per se that was my favorite, but it was a scene that was gory that was my favorite because she's just like tormented because it's I can't even imagine someone skinning my dad and then putting his skin on and sitting it.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I think it's a pretty gory movie. It is kinda it's literally leatherface. Minus literally leatherface and body.

SPEAKER_03

It's B movie leather leatherface. No, it's it's C, but it's great.

SPEAKER_09

I was surprised by the gore, and I'm surprised that you feel so strongly about it because I actually, going back and watching it now, however many years later, think it was kind of weak compared to my memories of it. I thought it was gonna have like way more blood, way more like eyeballs and gushing and things spurting and limbs coming off and that kind of thing. And when I go back to watch it, it was almost kind of bloodless in many parts, where they're showing again grotesque things like the the skin suit that we didn't have to see happen, thankfully, on screen. Um, or the human fish that again, thankfully, we only saw some like you know, slicing with razors, but we didn't get to see like the extent that it could have been in other films where they would have been like, you know, shearing the skin off of them with a razor blade and then blood everywhere and like the tissue underneath. A lot of I think movies would would go for that. We just get to see like a little bit here and there.

SPEAKER_01

I think I'm concerned for y'all's threshold of of gore. Well, it was a lot off-screen, it really was.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Here's the thing, Ryan, like it could have been so much worse. I think looking at the result we get, like for me, this is high. Yeah, this is just like uh more than I want. But even when I look at the first kills that we get of the people trying to rob the gas station, one of them is like hit in the head. Even that isn't the goriest I've ever seen. So looking at the 2007 Halloween remake and all the blood, like the excessive blood that's in that movie, I was actually expecting there to be more. I'm not mad there wasn't more. This was about as much as I could stomach. I'll tell you what was really gory though, all their fucking teeth.

SPEAKER_06

Ew.

SPEAKER_04

All disgusting.

SPEAKER_03

Yes, especially Grandpa Fly. His was like so nasty.

SPEAKER_07

There was honestly a lot of like gross mouth stuff happening in this movie, and for me that was like the part that I like couldn't really stomach. Like, specifically when Tiny is like eating out of that dog food bowl, and he's eating like let's say it, it looks like poop, and just like watching his mouth like put that in there. I was like, I couldn't look at the screen. I was like, that's very disgusting.

SPEAKER_01

The spoon was just like at his mouth, like it was Yeah, he was just like mushing it into his face.

SPEAKER_04

In his mouth. I'm sorry guys, I hate to be that weakling. I'm gagging right now hearing this. We gotta keep pushing. It's like I'm having to fight my gag reflex thinking about that scene. It's the different kind of gore.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah, that kind of gore never does it for me because I'm like, it's more gross than scary. You know what I mean? It's not like I'm afraid that's gonna happen to me. It's like, no, you have bad hygiene.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I think I agree. Uh the the thing about the gore is that a lot of what is the worst part of it is like the circumstances. Agree, yeah. It's not the kills, it's not like it's like it's not just that he's wearing skin, it's he's wearing her dad's skin. And like um, one that stands out for me is like the the chase down um when one of them gets away, and she's like, Oh, I'll go get him. And then she chases him down, and then just like the way she stabs him, like, like it's it's not even a a question of whether or not he's gonna make it right. Like, she's just going ham and having fun. And it's like the the fun feeling of the killers that makes it so like stressful.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, it is all these extra elements, like you know, when she's dropped down into this like abyss, I don't even know what you call it, and then there's all these like I don't know what they are, but they're grabbing at her. And what are they? Yeah, and then when the police officers or like sheriffs come in and they see all these bodies. I mean, okay, I'm gonna be honest, they look hella fake. But the thing is, the fact that like she's strung there, it it kind of just like evokes some emotion in me that I was like, oh, this is more sickening than it is grotesque, yeah, in my opinion.

SPEAKER_07

I feel like the the peak of the gore for me came at the end where we have Chris Hardwick getting open brain surgery from Dr. Satan. Yeah, I feel like like that was so insane, but I also feel like the way they designed Dr. Satan as a character was like very scary, very well done. And I was like, get the fuck out of here, like uh, because you could see he was like doing his experiments and stuff, and I was like, that is a very scary character, and I want to see that move because that's spooky as fuck.

SPEAKER_01

See, that's the exact moment where I feel like Rob Zombie was like, dude, I've always wanted to do this, so like let me figure out a way to make this character happen.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, he did it great, he made this lore of this, like Dr. Satan, and it started from the beginning, which was the reason why they even ended up at the house, which I thought was great, but like, give me more. Don't just give me that. I agree.

SPEAKER_07

If the whole movie had been that, that would have been great.

SPEAKER_04

Does it make sense? Sure. Did I need to see it? Nah. I look at this and you guys are like, yeah, I that I want to see more of that. And for me, that was like, God, can this be over already? I want to go back to the humans being fucking scarecrows, jumping these guys when they're trying to leave the property. That's the shit I want.

SPEAKER_07

That was spooky.

SPEAKER_04

That was awesome.

SPEAKER_07

But wait, not even like his assistant with that gross mouth, and then he like spews all that goop.

SPEAKER_04

Nah, um, that did nothing for me. It did nothing for me.

SPEAKER_09

I mean, I like toast too.

SPEAKER_01

It's the best way to describe it, honestly.

SPEAKER_09

Yeah, I was not a fan of that part either. But uh, you know, I think for in terms of brains, Hannibal does it better. So if you haven't watched it yet, you know, it's especially since we did Silence of the Lambs recently, you should go watch that because there's a much better brain scene in Hannibal and much gorier. I I still think, yeah, I think it's context that makes this movie gory because I don't think the actual gore that we get is as bad as we've seen in other films, especially films that we've reviewed on this podcast. I was watching a Netflix action movie earlier today that had more realistic and more like bloodier gunshots and wounds and stuff, and it was an action movie. So I I don't think it was that bad, but I think the context is really what adds to it.

SPEAKER_04

Can I share my favorite kill though? Yes, it's gotta be Fishboy.

SPEAKER_09

It's gotta be Fish Boy.

SPEAKER_04

Fishboy. I mean, I've never seen anything quite like a merman in a horror movie that is supposed to be the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, but we got it as a fucking fish boy.

SPEAKER_09

Wrong, Michael. I love that I love that they had Rain Wilson do that one. Like I just feel like it matches with him so well.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, for sure. I guess if I like The Office, I don't know. I I was a fan in Captain Spaulding's like stories, like you know, you have Ed Gean, and I think I I listened to a lot of podcasts on true crime, and I've heard all these. So, like, and then I'm like, oh, they threw in in the story of Dr. Satan, you know what I mean? So I thought that was really cool, and I I kind of love that scene. Like, and it honestly reminds me of the first time I went to a haunted house. Guys, I've been to a haunted house, and it was all fake, just like this uh little museum. It literally was just like this museum, and I was freaking terrified, so it kind of like also like was hit-home for me because I was like, Oh, this is like something I've been through, and got me so terrified I'll never go to another haunthouse.

SPEAKER_09

So, were your favorite kill that would be the kills described by Captain Spaulding?

SPEAKER_03

All those kills are amazing. I think you get to use your imagination. And I mean, Ed Gean, he is crazy as F. I'm not even gonna say it because I'm afraid he's gonna come back to life and kill me or something. I have no idea. Ed Gean is crazy if you've ever read about him. He's uh absolutely ridiculous, and then after that you have Dr. C and you don't even know like what he's gonna look like describing him, and then you see him and you're like, oh hell. And he's got this mouth that I don't even want to describe to you. But like, yeah, those kills that those are top-notch, like describing those.

SPEAKER_09

What about one on screen? Because I I have a favorite, um, and that's just killer Carl, like right off the bat. Uh, sticking up the wrong joint gets you got, and he stuck up the wrong joint. Because I mean, Captain Spaulding is obviously out there, and you're gonna come in here and try to rob him. First of all, how much cash do you think this dude actually has on hand? Because I don't think he's I think he's got like three quarters. Um, and then he and his friend like show no fear and don't give two F's. At that point, you should probably back out and get away. If you if you go to stick up that kind of place and ask for their dough and they don't even care and they laugh at you, it's probably time to leave. And you you just you made a mistake.

SPEAKER_04

With your masks that don't conceal your face or your jaw at all.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, I mentioned mine before, so mine's definitely like dawns because like you have Otis wearing his skin, and I I I I like that idea. It reminds me of you know Texas Chainsaw Massacre, it reminds me of Silence of the Lambs, and I just love those odes. To me, they were odes to like old horror movies, but I I I I love those.

SPEAKER_09

That was that was sad for me because that actor played the old version of Private Ryan in Saving Private Ryan. Uh when he comes back years later to the no one's seen this. Okay, that's fine.

SPEAKER_01

Anyway, he just anything other than horror movies I have seen pre- Saving Private Ryan because my dad lied to me for a very long time and said that's what I was named after.

SPEAKER_09

Oh, that's amazing.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, nice.

SPEAKER_09

Well, that that actor, like he's he shows up at the end of that and he plays like an old version of one of the characters. Um, and so when I'm watching this the entire time, I just I was just like, oh no, don't hurt him. You can't do that. He's like grandpa, you can't do that. And you know, of course, he gets got.

SPEAKER_01

They all get got in the end.

SPEAKER_09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

I'll be honest, I don't really have much of a favorite kill here because I found so many of them to just, I don't know, not sit right with me. And I realize I'm reviewing horror movies, right? Like I I shouldn't be like sensitive to the kills. I don't know, but for some reason, these I just from the very beginning of the movie, I just didn't feel into it. And so none of the kills were like, okay, I like that one. Um they were all, they were all a lot. It was a lot overall.

SPEAKER_07

It's also hard to pick a kill in a movie where you don't see a lot of the killing. You just kind of like see somebody get got, and then you're presented with like what becomes of them later on.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, you see a post-kill.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah, so my favorite one of those was actually when the cop opens up the shed and there's like all the dead cheerleaders there. Um, I feel like that was a really nice, like little vignette that could have been like maybe a like a short story. I would have liked to see more of how that went down and like how the like cheerleaders like got into this mess in the first place. Um I feel like that one had like a good bit of backstory for me, and it was like pretty good gore to look at.

SPEAKER_04

I did feel bad for those cheerleaders, especially. I mean, one of the things that I appreciated about it was how they just have they're discussing it in the background, on the news, on the radio. Just hear that I don't know, it kind of puts this interesting take of like, you know, we all sit here and read the news and we hear these stories of people who are missing, and when you stop to think about the true horrors they could be experiencing, right? Like, you know, Alexis, you're from Cleveland, the girls who were missing in Cleveland and kept in a basement. Things like that. Like it's just like this exactly. You never want to stop and think about it too long. Because it's scary, because it's terrifying, and to know it's just someone like next door. Yeah. Another one of the strengths of this movie, at least for me, was its lighting. The red lighting, um I in some parts I wasn't a fan of, like in the last part of the film, I find red lighting to be very soothing and relaxing. It reminds me of bedtime, but there was a specifically a shot at the gas station where it focuses on like Captain Spaulding's like neon blue roadside sign, and then it's like a sweeping shot down to the green lines up of like the carport portion of the gas station. That was just beautiful to me. And I was like, okay, this is gonna be slightly better, slightly better than I anticipated. And then this, you know, the lighting that we get in those rain scenes outdoors. I just I I thought there were there actually were parts of this movie that were pretty in a fucked up way.

SPEAKER_01

I have actually uh not necessarily a favorite scene visually to speak about, but something that really surprised me in this movie is how it wasn't shot as if it was set as far back as it was. I found it to be like so modern feeling in the way it was shot, even though it was set in this, like in like 77, right? I mean, uh we get, I guess, grimy, but I was expecting like that, that we're going for a 70s, 80s feeling. And you you don't really get that, in my opinion. Like you really get a a 2000s version of hey, this was in the 70s, but they basically just tell us that, right? Like it doesn't look like it.

SPEAKER_04

In some parts, it even reminded me of the level of filmmaking that we get with Terrifier, yeah. In some parts, so it it still feels very fresh. It doesn't feel like you know, because you guys know I don't like the early 2000s aesthetic. Yeah, and this was a void of that. Like there were still plenty of things in here that were aesthetically pleasing.

SPEAKER_01

Yes, it wasn't 2000s in a bad way. Yeah, I just was so surprised that it didn't have that old feeling that I expected when it was set so far back, you know?

SPEAKER_03

No, I get that, and I I see where you guys are coming from because you could be, you know, in the collector edition of this movie, which I think would have been so bad. So, like this raw, edgy. I mean, you guys are saying it's edgy, it's raw, it's but like in a good way, in my opinion. Yeah, I don't know. I think my favorite like visual element of this movie is definitely like I don't know what it is about Captain Spaulding and his place. It's my scene, it's my favorite visual element, but like nothing like a stucky pushing you behind, and you just think it's normal. Like this guy pushing you through an attraction. I don't know. I like that.

SPEAKER_07

That man looked like Quentin Tarantino, a murder ride, yeah.

SPEAKER_03

That's the kind of shit I want to see. Exactly. And you know what I thought about? Like, I was like, I'm like, we would all do this, and I'd be like, guys, let's just go to the next place. But I'd be like, oh, totally, let's just do it. I wouldn't do this. Oh, okay. So we'd be clear. So boring.

SPEAKER_04

I would want to do it. Ryan would become a Lexus who refuses to go to a haunted house. I would go as long as it's not scary.

SPEAKER_01

Wait, no, this reminds me of Captain Spaulding. Fuck yeah, let's go die. Dude, I'm all in until something feels wrong. And when something feels wrong, suddenly I'm gonna do whatever I want to do and not what y'all want. Let me tell you. You ain't getting me in there. If I've I'm like, I'm not sure. There's no one that can convince me. That's funny.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, it's just like I not that I have this familiarity with like any roadside attractions, but that's what it reminds me of. I literally don't. And if I do, I would be the person like, let's try that, let's try that. I would literally make a like five-hour road trip into like seven.

SPEAKER_09

Let me talk about one of my least favorite things about this visually. The collection of shots that we get that are like inverted, slowed down, you get flash with random graphic imagery. That kind of crap, I just like it was so hard to stomach, it was kind of a dizzying nuisance. The other, the other things we get thrown in are like home videos. Um, and so that's a little bit different, right? And so those, I just think it was editing that made them out seem out of place. I think it was a choice of like when they were inserted, but the ones that we get that are just like, you know, the dad driving up with the cops, and it's like the color is inverted and it's weird, and then suddenly like fades to normal at the end there. I was like, could you not just show us them showing up normally? Why did we have to like invert it and crap?

SPEAKER_04

It's gotta be artsy. You didn't like Predator Vision?

SPEAKER_09

Yeah, that's really that's we should just go back and retroactively uh edit this episode to say Predator Vision, because that's the issue I had with this film was the Predator Vision. Not the only issue, but obviously, but yeah, like there's just all these random shots of like like you mentioned before, someone like ripping nails out or whatever, you know, just like kind of intersperse into the film, and and that's what was visually annoying for me. The rest of the film, like you mentioned, Chris, like it doesn't have that typical 2000. Grittiness vibe, which is which is good, but I don't know that I have anything in favor of it visually.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah, visually, Mac, you're totally right. I feel like they made a lot of choices where they were just like, let's use this effect just because we can. And they used like every generic effect that like a video editing software comes pre-installed with.

SPEAKER_04

The Star Wipe.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_09

There's there's one shot in particular. I don't know if you caught this Paris, but when he's killing the last deputy, and it just lingers for like 45 minutes with him just pointing the gun at him before he shoots him.

SPEAKER_01

Everyone caught it.

SPEAKER_09

Yeah, I thought something happened. I was like, I thought the movie stopped playing.

SPEAKER_01

And that was 100%. I mean, that's one of those arts, artsy things that he was trying to do. Like, let's sit on this moment for a while. And for me, it was just like, did I pause the movie accidentally? Is that what happened?

SPEAKER_07

But like Chris was saying, I did like a lot of the lighting in some of the scenes. Um, like there's a scene where everyone's like walking out into like the blue foggy night with uh the prisoners in tow and they all have these different like costumes on. I was like, oh, this is kind of like a fun little, again, very like music video vibe. Uh, but there was also a shot that I really appreciated where we have Denise crawling out from the earth. Uh, and they use this like, I'm sure they like dug a hole or something, but then there was all this hay everywhere. So it like really gave you the feeling that she was like coming up from the bowels of hell, which she just escaped. So I like that scene.

SPEAKER_01

What I thought in that moment was so she just like found a spot to just like crawl up through the ground because I'm a horrible person.

SPEAKER_07

A spot that was just hay.

SPEAKER_01

Like that's oh, okay, there's just a hole there with hay covering it, she'll be fine. And it was just like nothing around her fell, right? She just like perfectly popped out of this spot. And I, you know, you know me, I can never suspend my disbelief. I'm always like, oh, that doesn't make sense.

SPEAKER_04

I also want to give a shout out to the whole reason she was able to escape and crawl her way out of the earth, and that was the world worst antagonist who caused the own collapse on himself.

SPEAKER_01

I'm sorry. Please don't ruin my favorite scene of the whole entire movie, which is where one hit ruined the entire infrastructure of an underground tunnel. Okay.

SPEAKER_09

You're talking about knockoff Bane?

SPEAKER_01

Yes. And one beam, one beam got hit, and everything came tumbling down.

SPEAKER_07

Listen, corpses don't have the most structural integrity.

SPEAKER_01

I'm just saying, man. I'm just saying. I was like, oh, okay, well, that's the end of that. That was an easy solution there. We didn't even need to do much work.

SPEAKER_09

Alexis stole my favorite scene already, but I have an easy backup scene, and that's when the cops were interviewing Captain Spaulding. That was also a fantastic scene, and we got to see him being funny and being entertaining, and his facial expressions were amazing.

SPEAKER_04

He is funny. I enjoyed Captain Spaulding in the very, very beginning, after they're talking about the guy who likes to masturbate a lot, like immediately after that bit of dialogue, every other moment for him, except for the no, like a big girl likes more cushion for the pushing. I could have done without that segment. But everything else I found absolutely hilarious.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, that was my favorite part of this movie. Like I um kind of obsessed, like the dark humor in this movie, and I feel kind of bad for it because sometimes I'm like, nah, I should not be laughing. But like honestly, Captain Spaulding makes the movie. Otis his humor's kind of like degrading, kind of doesn't transfer into like now, but like Captain Spaulding is just like his one-liners are like freaking amazing. And I love it. And I'm glad they're not cheesy clown ones either. I will take that.

SPEAKER_09

Was Otis funny? No. Did I miss that? I never thought so. Okay, did you?

SPEAKER_03

Otis made jokes, but Otis made jokes like if we were in an awkward situation, we made a joke. Like, not necessarily everyone would think it's funny, it's just maybe you.

SPEAKER_09

He seems he seemed like the kind of guy that you would be alone in a really scary environment and he would make a joke about harming you and then be like, Why aren't you laughing?

SPEAKER_07

Yeah, and you're like, not sure if it's serious. Right, right.

SPEAKER_02

But you want to choke me? Uh um, but is it funny?

SPEAKER_07

Okay, I've got a favorite scene for you. How about this one? Uh the scene where we have baby doing a musical number for really no reason at all in that evening gown with that like terrible makeup. I thought that scene started off pretty well because I was like, okay, now this is bizarre. This is something else entirely. Um, but then it kind of ended really poorly with like a character totally overreacting to a woman really just performing a song. Um, and she's like, hey, get off my man, and then they like fight, but then baby has a fun line where she threatens to like cut her fucking tits off and shove them down her throat, which I thought was a funny thing for one character to say to another.

SPEAKER_04

So yeah, that feels very on brand for your humor.

SPEAKER_07

I was like just the logistics of like cutting off a boob and like feeding it to someone.

SPEAKER_03

Sounds complicated.

SPEAKER_09

Do you think this is the point in the movie where they could have turned things around if they had just like let her do her number and they were like, well, you know, thanks. We're uh we'll go to go ahead and get out of here since our cross is red. Do you think they'd have been like, well, those were nice folks, we won't kill them?

SPEAKER_04

Uh no. I think there are multiple points where they could have just been a little less offensive and a little less on the high on the pedestal, and they may have made it out a little bit better.

SPEAKER_07

I didn't see that ever happening.

SPEAKER_01

I feel like it was just gonna be this way. This is there's a reason they set this all up, you know?

SPEAKER_07

Yeah, they have a thousand bodies for their mercy.

SPEAKER_04

Well, they could have also just not picked her up, so a theoretical thousand bodies. You know, I mentioned this earlier, but my absolute favorite scene is just that moment where everything goes to shit before the rest of the movie actually goes to shit, in my opinion. I think that's actually one of the best parts. It's the dynamics of the hierarchy of this weird fucking family and just the logistics of they are prepared and ready on the scarecrows. Like they devised a plan for this. It's like, all right, guys, we're gonna try uh, you know, let's go ahead and execute order 73. I want you guys up on the scarecrows, you guys out back. I want you to go ahead and just put on a new tire on this car. We're gonna make it real elaborate and very theatrical. So here's the thing, right? Like the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, only a couple people, right? It's a father, a couple sons, and then a grandfather. It's there's not a lot there, right? But this is an overwhelming amount of people in this movie. And I think it's one of the only things that worked in its favor.

SPEAKER_09

How did none of them get killed, though? That's what upsets me.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_09

Like so many antagonists, and not one of them gets killed on screen.

SPEAKER_04

Well, I mean, the guy who, you know, had that building c the the earth collapse on him.

SPEAKER_09

Yeah, he wasn't part of the family though. He was just the hired goon. Also, I'm pretty sure he was already dead. Right. He's undead.

SPEAKER_01

And I actually thought he came back at the end, so I don't know anything.

SPEAKER_07

I feel like he got he might be he may be dead.

SPEAKER_04

I mean, it's a Rob Zombie film, right? There's gotta be some undead in there. Is that a pun? It's a bad one. I got it.

SPEAKER_03

For me, the worst part, which is a good majority of the movie, are these clips, these homemade documentaries. And I think I don't recall that from the beginning. And I know we've kind of talked about through the through the um podcast on this and how it's surprising, and it it's it it does it for some people and it doesn't for other for others. And to me, it was just like kind of this cheesy. I was like, I needed one or two less, or I needed them to be consistent with like if they found a footage and this was like the footage they found, and like give me like some sort of backstory on that, where there would be some context to why he's randomly throwing this into the film.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I agree with you for sure. I think we've talked a lot about like those little cutscenes. We do this silly thing here on the podcast where I have to say a best part of a movie that I hacked, and I find that so difficult. I gotta be nice sometimes. I gotta be nice sometimes. It's so funny because there are some movies where I don't have any trouble, even though I'll give it a hack. I I know there's this and this and this that I love. Um, I will say something that I talked about earlier that feels very over the top and very um intense, but I actually enjoy it separate from enjoying the movie is the the makeup and the effects that we get. I think we have some really incredible characters built in this movie, and a lot of it, a lot of it is based on like special effects or makeup and stuff like that. And although I did not enjoy maybe how they were in the movie or the characters that they played in the movie visually, you can't take off the the value that they give for to this movie, and I would say they are the best part.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, it's kind of iconic, right?

SPEAKER_01

It is. I will say it is, even though I don't like the movie, I will say that the the makeup and the effects, which I think is a very important part of this, are very intense and and great.

SPEAKER_09

I can roll right off of that because I think the best part was the cast, including, of course, Sid Haig as Captain Spaulding. Uh I I think the cast really gave it some major points. And I think had we had lesser known people, I mean, at least lesser known to us now, or completely B movie actors, I don't think any of us would be even considering this slash material. I think we would have thought this was a total joke, and at least one of us doesn't. So that's that's a good sign.

SPEAKER_03

At least one.

SPEAKER_07

Honestly, when it comes to the cast, there were a few standouts for me as well as part of my base my best part, um, because I was kind of checked out of the movie mostly during the beginning, and then we're introduced to Baby Firefly in her like really like swampy, like hitchhiker look, kind of looking like a backwoods Faith Hill. And I was like, Okay, who is this? Let's let's learn more about what's happening here. When she started acting, I was I my first reaction was like, Oh, is she like dating Rob Zombie? Is that why she's in this? Um, so it's very funny to find out that yes, that is the case. Uh but in the end, I feel like she actually gave a pretty solid performance. And her, in combination with um like the mom in the family, uh, I felt like they had a really good like dynamic. Those are two characters that I enjoyed seeing on the screen the most, and they they're what kept me in it when I was starting to kind of feel bored.

SPEAKER_04

That's very interesting, and I can I can respect that. It's funny that you say a you mention her hitchhiker look because her hitchhiker look feels now like that's where Rob Zombie got the inspiration for what Michael Myers looks like in Halloween 2. Um Shania Twitch with a hood. Yeah, it's all weird. It's all weird. We will get to it at some point against my my soul's desire. But it's funny because Sherry Moon, the the only thing I've ever seen her in is the 2007 Halloween movie, and I think she was one of the better elements of that. She plays Michael Myers' mother, and I thought she had a really great performance in that movie, and I was like, man, what a coincidence that he found you know hit that his wife is such a phenomenal actress. And then I saw this movie, and she doesn't have a bad performance, but her voice is so unnerving to me, and I can't take it seriously. It's so high up there, and it's it's a it's a 20 when I needed it to be a six, and uh I just I couldn't jive with it. And I feel like she actually had one of the weaker moments for me in the in the cast.

SPEAKER_01

I gotta agree with you and mention that I feel like something we haven't really talked about here, and I don't know, maybe it just stood out to me, but like some of the sounds that we get in this movie go incredibly loud and incredibly high. And I would say like audibly, this is not necessarily the most enjoyable movie to to watch or listen to. But for me, the only character that I feel anything about, and it it's kind of like small and means nothing, which is also a pun, you'll see in a second. Um, is like a tiny. For some reason, Tiny reminded me of like Michael Berryman from The Hills Have Eyes, where he's just like there. You almost you almost care about him, you almost enjoy him a little bit. I don't know.

SPEAKER_07

Tiny was cool. The scene where he's um with Denise and her, she's like tied to that bed dressed like a baby doll, and he's just kind of like doing his thing while she escapes. And then she like leaves, she's like, I'm gonna leave now, I'm going home. And then he just kind of like waves her off. He's like, Yeah, that's fine, you go. Okay, don't care.

SPEAKER_04

And then Otis looks back at him and he just shrugs.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

He's like when he pulls the straps off and he's just like, Oh, I mean, all you have to do was ask. Here you go. Like, she's like, please let me free. And he's like, Oh, okay, whatever. Nobody's gonna be like if only that worked most of the time.

SPEAKER_04

If only it were so simple. He seems like a great human trapped in bad circumstances.

SPEAKER_09

I don't think a lot of the characters are really given a chance to show us all they've got. You know, some of them I think feel kind of lived in, kind of human, kind of gritty, uh, but they are they're restrained, they're held back, and a lot of the other characters are not, and they're really two-dimensional. Um, so you know, like Tiny, for instance, very interesting. Love that little moment of comedy. That was great, but that's like all you get from him.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, I wish there was more. Did you get anything from Otis? And I think I like Otis because I follow Bill Mosley like on Instagram. So I'm like, okay, cool. Like, I see all these, like I know it's Ryan's laughing at me. I really do. You could, but it's way before this. So I'm like, what made me so eager to follow him? And I'm sure it was this movie. Yeah, it had to have been this movie. Fucking scraggly hair. He he posts really weird things, I have to tell you. So just a random, like, what would an actor in Rob Zombies movies post and be like a random thing? Like, here's my dinner. Yeah, I can imagine weird things, to be honest.

SPEAKER_09

So for Otis, I I we did get a good bit of two-dimensional uh character development. And the thing I think was lacking from this entire thing was motivation for this family. Um, because they're really playing at the whole like cult leader thing, right?

SPEAKER_03

But it's like at the end, I feel like they just started playing that.

SPEAKER_09

Even the videos with the cheerleaders, you know, of him like complaining that they're not getting what he's trying to do. It's just like, well, what is what is it you're trying to do?

SPEAKER_01

I needed motivation, yeah.

SPEAKER_09

Right. And it's like, is there something that they're angry about? You know, like in the Hills Have Eyes, the remake, we get a little bit of that from the uh like the brainy act here. You get a little bit of that motivation, but from here it's just kind of like you guys just enjoy torturing and killing. Right. Um, but it seemed like they were playing at something more, and so I I think they kind of dropped the ball there.

SPEAKER_01

It's like, what are they doing experiments for? What do they like need these people for? Why do they bring things? Like, there's just so it's so intricate, and the story is so unintricate. That's not a word, but we're gonna go with it. It's so simple, it's just oh, we just kidnap people, but like y'all do a lot, y'all do a lot to kidnap some people. There are easier ways, I'm sure.

SPEAKER_09

Right, because if it's all about Dr. Satan in the end, like that, you know, that should come up.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_09

Um, where they're just kind of like playing him off the entire film, like, ah, whatever, it's just Dr. Satan, like, don't believe everything you're told. But in the end, they deliver them to him. So if if that's what they're about, like giving him more flesh to experiment on, like show us that that's what they're all about.

SPEAKER_04

Right, exactly. So it sounds like we have some moments, right, where the cast and and and the characters feel pretty substantial, and they feel like they could be a pretty high point for this movie, and then there's a lot that's left to be desired. But the real question is, how does all that play out? How does it even out? Despite having four hacks for this movie, and you know, obviously, this is one of Lexus will probably undoubtedly watch many times in her life. Would you guys actually watch this again?

SPEAKER_01

Here's the thing this is bad, and for me, it's just not me. It's the type of movie that I never want to see again, and also, you know, it may I this is the kind of movie that makes me I might not show up to the podcast again, you know? Like I'm done, you know, I might quit, it might be over.

SPEAKER_09

Wow, wow.

SPEAKER_01

I'm being dramatic, of course, but this is when we watch these movies, you know, sometimes things just aren't your jam. And I respect that it's your jam, Alexis, but it is not my jam. And so I I feel a weight when I have to watch these movies, and therefore I would never watch this again.

SPEAKER_03

I definitely watch it, and I'm not and I love you for it.

SPEAKER_01

That's what matters.

SPEAKER_03

And I think it's just I like this, and there's a s there's two sequels, I think, at this point. Um, so like I love that idea. Um these characters are wacky. I I don't think it'd be something I'm like, hey, to someone I just met or someone This isn't like a general watch, right? You don't watch this on like the first date. You guys wanna throw on House of a Thousand Corpses? One the title is uh like assuming for sure. Like so, but I don't I don't know. I I definitely obviously watch this again.

SPEAKER_09

Well, this counts as a rewatch for me since I've already seen it, right? So uh done. I rewatched it. Uh but no, I would not re-watch it again. I wouldn't seek it out. Like if it's you know, if it's gonna be part of something where I have to watch it, sure. But it's also not really up my alley, and so it's it's not something that I would add to any list. Same. This is a hard pass.

SPEAKER_04

Mm-hmm. It's a big hell no for me. But I uh like I did say earlier, if someone put a gun to my head and made me pick between this and the Black Christmas 2006, this would win. Um because that other one was just that bad for me. But clearly the majority of us never want to hear about this movie again. However, we do have to hear about it a little bit longer with Max Factor Fiction.

SPEAKER_09

That's right. Let's start out with number one. Rob Zombie stated the film is not his best, but holds a special place in his heart due to it being his first feature film, and how much he enjoyed getting to work with his then girlfriend, Sherry Moon Zombie.

SPEAKER_01

Fiction. I feel like he's very proud of this.

SPEAKER_07

I'm also gonna say fiction. I feel like oh no, wait. No, I'm gonna say fact because everything in that made sense to me. Sorry.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, I'm gonna say fact.

SPEAKER_09

So depending on how you interpreted what I said, that's fine. But it's a fiction. He actually said the film was a calamitous mess.

SPEAKER_01

Oh.

SPEAKER_09

Stating, all I see is flaw upon flaw upon flaw upon flaw.

SPEAKER_01

I was right, but judged his character completely wrong.

SPEAKER_09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Interesting.

SPEAKER_09

So he would hack it. Yeah, he would he probably would hack it. Um, there are a few posters about missing boys posted in the film, but those aren't shots of child actors. Those are pictures of Rob Zombie and his brother Spider One as children.

SPEAKER_01

I'm sorry, the child's name is Spider One?

SPEAKER_09

His brother's name is is Spider One, he's the uh lead singer of Powerman 5000.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, not actually his name. Got it. Uh a fact I have no idea.

SPEAKER_09

Um This sounds factual.

SPEAKER_01

I'm gonna say fiction.

SPEAKER_09

Well, you shouldn't have because it was a fact.

SPEAKER_03

Oh shit.

SPEAKER_09

Yep, that was the two of the two of them as kids, and yeah, so his his brother's, I guess, stage name is is indeed Spider One. And I mean, when worlds collide, have you not heard that track?

SPEAKER_04

No. Oh my goodness. I mean, maybe, but there are better. I've heard nothing except for whatever was in Twiz and Metal now that I know that that's a thing.

SPEAKER_09

Alright, number three, talk about full circle. Zombie got the idea for this film while designing a haunted house attraction for Universal Studios Hollywood. Later, a haunted house based on the film was made for Universal's Halloween horror nights.

SPEAKER_01

I'm going with fiction because of the first part.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah, I feel like I feel like Mac got like a haunted house vibe from this, because I kind of did too, and then made this question up completely.

SPEAKER_03

Uh, it's definitely fact. I mean, I don't know, but I'm saying it's you You do know this is a this is indeed a fact. Exactly. Sorry.

SPEAKER_09

The haunted house inspired, movie-inspired haunted houses were a thing in 2010 and 2019.

SPEAKER_04

Ryan, you literally said Rob Zombie's like, I want to make a room like this. Yeah, I realize that now.

SPEAKER_09

Zombie code time. I was in the office of the head of the production or something, and he asked me if I had any movie ideas, and I pitched him corpses, which was very rough at the time because I wasn't ready and I made it up on the spot. He liked it. I went home, wrote a 12-page treatment, and met up with them. Two months later, we're shooting.

SPEAKER_04

Yep, it seems that way. I believe that completely. I got an idea. Let's do Checks' chainsaw massacre, except for the gas station with fried chicken in the beginning. That's it. Yeah, he had just seen The Hills Have Eyes the night before.

SPEAKER_09

Number four. The seemingly random home movie segments in which Otis and Baby show us how truly weird they are, were based on Rob Zombie and his brother Spider-One's own home videos as children, as they experimented with filming, acting, and performing music.

SPEAKER_01

I'm just gonna go fiction even though I know it's wrong.

SPEAKER_07

That sounds like a fact. This feels like it felt like he was taking like old projects that he had done and kind of just giving them a purpose and sticking them in here.

SPEAKER_03

I wouldn't say necessarily a parish said, but yeah, I agree that it's fact.

SPEAKER_09

This is fiction. So those home videos that they took were actually based off of the Manson family's supposed home movies.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Hills Have Eyes and the Mansons.

SPEAKER_09

Well, number five. Zombie has stated that he hoped for there to be more comedy in the film, wishing to channel campy horror films from the 1980s.

SPEAKER_01

Oh go fact there.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah, I'm also gonna go fact. It felt like they were really trying to be funny.

SPEAKER_01

Fact.

SPEAKER_09

It's fiction. Reverse, reverse. Zombie didn't intend for there to be black comedy. He said, turned out a little wackier and campier than I originally intended. But as we were shooting, that's the tone it was turning out to be. Movies sometimes dictate their own course, so I just went with it.

SPEAKER_01

I mean, I mean that works. You can tell the movie what to do. You can you can direct it, I guess. Literally.

SPEAKER_04

How hilarious is it that you try so hard to channel these gritty, intense horror movies from the 70s that you end up making an 80s slasher.

SPEAKER_09

Wow. And that's factor fiction.

SPEAKER_04

What an educational time we are all a little bit better for it, even if we're not a little bit better for having watched this movie, because the overwhelming majority of us have given House of a Thousand Corpses in 2003 four hacks and one slash. This movie has a huge following. It's considered a cult classic, even if Rob Zombie calls it a calamitous mess. Naturally, we are sure there are millions of people out there who vibe so much with Alexis and are so mad at the rest of us for hacking this movie, and we want to know your thoughts. And if you agree with the rest of us, please back us up here too. You can find this movie streaming online, so give it a watch, then hit us up. There are a number of ways you can reach out to us, starting with our website, hackerslash.com.

SPEAKER_03

And if you agree with me, I'd love to hear it on our social media accounts on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.

SPEAKER_01

You can also reach out to our hackerslash hotline. You can leave us a voicemail at 757 606 0128, or visit hackerslash.com slash contact to send us an audio message, especially if you're international.

SPEAKER_09

Or if you're currently stranded in some sort of house made out of a thousand corpses, you can send Send us an email at the feedback at hackerslash.com.

SPEAKER_07

And if you've enjoyed listening to this podcast, consider becoming one of our patrons. Visit patreon.com/slash hacker slash to earn cool perks for as low as one dollar a month.

SPEAKER_04

We'll see you next time. Bye.