SPEAKER_04 0:04

How could you hate on some naked fire jumping, you know?

SPEAKER_00 0:12

Greetings and salutations, and welcome to Hackerslash. If you're joining us again, welcome back. You've come of your own free will to the appointed place, the game is over. If this is your first time listening, welcome to the party. We are a horror movie review podcast dedicated to telling you whether a movie is a hack, a total joke, a waste of time, or a slash. Totally killer pun intended. We believe horror is for everyone, and as such, we're rating these movies with the perspective we've all gained from our varying walks of life and the flavors of fear we fancy most. My name is Chris, I'm your friendly neighborhood slasher enthusiast. This week I'm joined by the gore lover Alexis. Hey everyone, the cowardly creeper Ryan, hiya, and the Scream Queen Paris.

SPEAKER_02 0:53

Phallic symbol, phallic symbol.

SPEAKER_00 0:55

It's a two-for-one special this week as we compare an iconic 70s mystery to its infamous early 2000s remake. Before we get down to business though, we have some follow-up.

SPEAKER_02 1:05

We recently reviewed a movie called Insidious here on the podcast. Uh, and to be honest, everyone, I am bad. I still have not watched this.

SPEAKER_04 1:13

It's okay, it's the uh the hope in your heart to watch it one day that matters.

SPEAKER_02 1:18

I do. It is definitely my intent to at one point watch it. We wanted to hear how our listeners felt about it, and truly it did very well. Only 14% gave it a hack, and 86% gave it a slash. But we have a comment from one of our listener, and the comments are really where you find out what's going on. Uh Marshall on Twitter said, I really enjoyed how this movie starts off by giving you a heart attack. Insidious! The full body workout without having to move is a nice bonus. Every muscle was tense for basically two hours. I knew the jump scares were coming, but they still got me quite a few times. Total slash.

SPEAKER_01 1:48

This will definitely be my summer body workout, I guess. I'll just watch the entire summer movies.

SPEAKER_02 1:53

We also have some comments from our friends on Instagram. Lance said this movie was creepy as fuck. Brian said it was hands down one of the scariest movies ever. While Aaron said it freaked me out for the entire night and I couldn't sleep. While Manny said, a really good film that I've seen multiple times. Uh so there's a lot of love for this movie out there. Um I promise I will watch this at some point. And we actually have another comment from one of our patrons, Brittany R. Hey Britney. She said, Great episode. Insidious is a slash for me, but to be honest, Darth Maul Demon makes it a softer slash because he truly looks ridiculous. The drawing Elise makes is far more terrifying than the reality. I highly encourage watching the next three movies in this franchise as they really complete the story and delve deeper into the true all-star and gem of the film, Lynn Shea. They explore some deeper themes and are so enjoyable in my opinion. I agree with Alexis and do love these characters. As an exhausted mom, Rose Byrne definitely does a fabulous job in her role. So relatable. Another favorite scene for me is in their new home with the dancing demon boy. Great jump scare when he pops out, and such ominous music. As a dance instructor, I gotta appreciate every random dancing moment.

SPEAKER_01 2:58

Yeah, that little boy, especially when you see him in one scene and then like through a window. I mean, it was just it was a great it was a great scene. And creepy as what. Dance like only the demons are watching.

SPEAKER_02 3:08

Now that we know that Britney R is a dance instructor, I have to find out if she's seen Suspiria, either the original or the remake, because that's probably a whole other perspective watching it. And that is our follow-up.

SPEAKER_00 3:19

Many moons ago in episode 102, we broke down Ari Aster's Minsumar, a film that lived at the intersection of a young woman's trauma and a village celebrating one of their longest traditions. Now what we didn't discuss in that episode, however, were the parallels it had to a 1973 film Astor took great inspiration from. A film that has been described as the citizen cane of horror movies, and was one of the earliest films to make its audiences afraid of what happens in broad daylight. Both the original film and its successor find an officer of the law traveling to a remote island in an attempt to locate a missing girl. The plots thicken, however, when he learns many of the residents claim no such girl exists, and the deeper he digs into the ongoings of the island, the more that seems to be amiss. Now despite having a script with dialogue that is largely identical to its predecessor, the 2006 remake brings a different twist to the characters and even the island itself. Ultimately, though, it proved to be a box office failure after only managing to gross $39 million after costing forty million dollars to produce.

SPEAKER_03 4:19

Oh no.

SPEAKER_00 4:19

This week we're talking about both incarnations of the Wicker Man. Who had seen either of these before?

SPEAKER_04 4:25

Y'all know who I am as a person. I've never seen these, but also I never heard of the Wicker Man, either old or new.

SPEAKER_01 4:31

I've seen the 2006 version for sure, actually, like a few times. It's been it's been a while since I watched it, but definitely not the 1973.

SPEAKER_02 4:39

Yeah, I had only heard of the remake. Uh I remember it being advertised when it came out. Since then, I think we can say some things have gone viral and I've been made aware of it the movie through that. Um, but I did not know it was a remake, so I had no idea that was a thing that we'd be doing this week.

SPEAKER_00 4:54

Oh, for sure. I actually hadn't seen either of these movies before, and I have heard quite a bit about the original over the years. I've seen stills of the Wicker Man himself, but I didn't know anything about the plot going into it. One of the folks I served with named Mel gave our Mitsumar episode a listen, and he said he was surprised that we hadn't mentioned anything about the obvious parallels there. Yeah. Now, I originally thought it was because out of the three of us, myself, Paris, and Alexis, none of us had seen it. So I'm actually really surprised to know that Alexis watched the 2006 version.

SPEAKER_01 5:23

Yeah, it was, I know we were talking about that earlier. I was like, how did I miss this? Because as soon as I put this on, I was just like, oh, it's Midsumar. Like, what? Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 5:33

I feel like we need to redo our originality segment from the Midsumar episode and come correct this time.

SPEAKER_00 5:40

My bad. Perhaps we can make up for lost time and lost knowledge later in this episode. Now we're gonna get to those parallels a little bit later, but in terms of expectations, I was really expecting the original to be great and the remake to be total trash. Uh, because that's all I've ever heard of it, right? I've heard it's unintentionally funny, largely because Nicolas Cage is so over the top and over X. Really, all I had to go on was this natural conclusion that the original would be absolutely amazing and the remake would just leave this bad taste in my mouth. But what were you folks expecting?

SPEAKER_04 6:09

I didn't really have much to expect going in because I had never even heard of them. I was just looking at the images in the TV app when I was searching for them, and I was like, why is Nicolas Cage in a scary movie? First off, I don't know, I don't know why that stands out to me as inappropriate. Um, and then in the first, you get an image with um some masks and stuff, and I was like, what are we what are we going in for here? And I can tell you, no matter what I would have expected going in, I never would have expected what we get out of these movies. It both as a whole, as two separate units, it's just all unexpected.

SPEAKER_01 6:47

Yeah, I think I was in a wild ride for the um original one. I wasn't expecting um seeing as I saw the remake, I was like, okay, well, I wonder if you know the remake was shot for shot. So I was interested to see that. But you know, it's so funny. I know we're gonna talk about this later, but in my expectations for this movie, I was like, everyone's gonna hack this 2006 version for sure. Because there's so much stuff around, yeah, like Chris mentioned, like the overacting of Nicolas Cage and just like the ridiculousness of it all, and it's like a joke. So I was like, man, everyone's gonna think that this is the case, too. And I was like, everyone's gonna hack it. So I'm interested to see how this plays out tonight for sure.

SPEAKER_02 7:27

Yeah, I was definitely expecting to hack the original. It's a movie I've never heard of from the 70s, so I was just hedging my bets there. Um, more than likely, I was gonna hate it. Uh, I figured I would enjoy the 2006 version more, but even though I had like vague awareness of the remake, I didn't have any idea what it was about. So I wrote my expectations solely based on the title. Um, so like you have wicker, which is famously very ugly furniture. That didn't sound good. And then you have man, which I was like, eh, fine. I guess we'll I guess we'll see what this will be.

SPEAKER_01 7:56

My whole bedroom set was wicker.

SPEAKER_02 7:58

A bedroom set? Oh, that's heinous. I thought it was exclusively outdoor.

SPEAKER_04 8:02

I think you're just missing the good wicker. There is good and bad wicker in the world.

SPEAKER_00 8:07

I've always we were never really allowed to have wicker things growing up because my mom was insistent not only that it was unappealing, but that like bugs would be drawn to it.

SPEAKER_02 8:17

I could see that.

SPEAKER_00 8:18

I think you guys are tainted by Florida, in your opinion, wicker.

SPEAKER_02 8:22

Quite possibly. Actually, the Rattan furniture, which is basically wicker in Animal Crossing, is actually very cute. So maybe there is good wicker out there, Ryan.

SPEAKER_04 8:30

There you go.

SPEAKER_02 8:30

But yeah, I was also expecting Nicolas Cage and bees for the remake. No idea what cohacity that would manifest in, but I knew that was gonna happen.

SPEAKER_00 8:38

Hmm. Okay. Well, that's fair. I I think I would agree that especially with Ryan, you know, we watched this together. Uh I did not expect anything close to what we actually got. And I I want to just really paint the picture for you all and drive home what this experience was like for me. I was exhausted. And before we started, I gave her a warning that if I didn't finish and I just fell asleep, that I just pick it up tomorrow morning, don't worry about me. But as the movie went on, I found myself largely bewildered by the original. And there was a ton going on that felt really bizarre, really out of place, and generally uncomfortable. A lot of looking at Ryan, like, what the hell's going on here? Uh is this really what we're experiencing right now? And not necessarily in a bad way. It was just unexpected. And it kept me so engaged the entire time that by the time we finished, I was like, okay, I guess I can start the next one. I like this movie made me not tired, which is bizarre to me. But then I watched a remake today and it just felt bland and boring, and not even remotely as funny as I would have hoped, given how outrageous people have found it over the years. So I found it less funny than people said it was, which disappointed me.

SPEAKER_02 9:49

I can echo that, Chris. I really went into the original, kind of expecting it to be bad and expecting to be bored. Um, but right off the jump, you get some like really beautiful aerial shots of like what I assume is northern Scotland. And I was like, oh, this is actually really pretty. Um and a lot of the visuals kind of were surprising me early on, and I was like, oh, at least this movie looks good. I have no idea what the hell's gonna happen. Um and as the movie progressed, I still had no idea what the hell was happening. Um so I was definitely intrigued. Um I also found myself kind of getting into the mystery of it all. Um, and I was like, okay, well, I don't know where this is going, but I'm looking forward to seeing where it ends. Uh when it came to the remake, I can agree I was it was very familiar because it was not shot for shot, but almost line for line, and it just felt like an updated version. I was a little bit surprised by some of the changes they made though, as far as like the the lore and the storytelling.

SPEAKER_01 10:43

I watched these two a day apart. It's weird that we all kind of had the same thing. Ryan and I mentioned, you know, getting a little sleepy in the 2006 version. But it was surprisingly I mean, now that everyone's talking about it, like, yeah, I guess the first one like definitely like caught my attention and was interesting enough. Lots of phallic things. Maybe that's what caught my attention. I don't know. Or maybe I was just like wondering where was this going with all of these um penis things? Like, like which which way are they gonna go? Which way are they gonna go?

SPEAKER_00 11:18

If if ever there was an episode for you, this is it. Exactly. I was it was a little much, actually.

SPEAKER_01 11:25

But yeah, I was getting a lot of vibes from Midsummer, and I was like, Yeah, surprised about all the Felix stuff. But the remake, I was just, you know, feeling I'm like, yeah, why isn't this as sexual? Uh maybe that's why it didn't keep my attention. I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 11:40

Honestly, though, you might be onto something there because I felt so overwhelmed by the nudity and the way it was done in the original. Then to go to the remake, well, again, it's just like you say next day later, I was like, well, we're just gonna go to no boobs? We're just gonna go from some too many to none. You get some.

SPEAKER_02 12:01

Ryan, what is the perfect number of boobs?

SPEAKER_04 12:04

I'm just saying it's a horror movie. Okay. There's an expectation. But the way it is done in the first is actually overwhelming. And then you get to the remake and you just really, you know, it really is a movie that could put you to sleep. Especially when you've just watched two of the again, not line for line, but two of the very similar movies. Yeah and very similar paths that they go down. So it's interesting to be saying one is too much and one is not enough. So I guess I'm Goldilocks here when it comes to boobs and horror movies. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 12:37

Yeah, I I think we can find the the sweet spot for you. That's what she said. Many folks agree with you, right? Like Robin Hardy directed the original The Wicker Man, and he part of his take on this movie was strong sexual freedom, uh connection to nature, independence, just total peace in that regard. And the remake ignored it, and it ignored quite a number of other things, but that's part of why a lot of folks felt like this movie failed at the box office. It ignored half of the identity. And granted, I don't think they could make the same movie identically in it be as good right now. Maybe that's an unpopular opinion. And then one of the other things that surprised me in terms of like things that changed, I can't quite place whether this is like a disappointment in itself. But what I found most jarring was the musical component to the original Wicker Band.

SPEAKER_03 13:29

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:29

And the songs weren't even bad. Uh I would say bad. They were bad for sure. I would say not good. I don't know, because some of the time I was like, okay.

SPEAKER_02 13:38

I liked some of the songs.

SPEAKER_00 13:40

Like it's odd. It's all odd, but they weren't bad. I love a good musical, but it's almost as if there wasn't enough to push it in one direction or the other. Like it wasn't not a musical, but it also wasn't enough like spontaneous song and dance to plant it firmly in musical territory for me. Like it wasn't it clearly wasn't Greece, clearly wasn't Rocky Horror Picture Show. You know what I mean? Uh it's kind of like in the nowhere land. So then for that to just be totally stripped alongside the you know the the sexual freedom in the remake, that was a total surprise for me as well. And some of the things that they changed are for the better. I don't think, again, they could pull off the musical choices that they made in this remake and it'd still be good. I don't want to see Nicolas Cage in a semi-musical. And again, this is another disappointment. Like the original had this really interesting take on religion, and then you totally don't get that. You get like maybe one line alluding to that into the remake.

SPEAKER_02 14:33

So I was very much surprised, like you, Chris, about the musicality of the original. Um, but the biggest surprise of it all was how I didn't hate it. I it might be because at the very beginning you have this like this um like message or like a thank you that's like we wanted to thank the people of this place for sharing their culture and traditions with us or whatever. And I was like, oh, okay, what does that mean? Um so whenever there was like song, I viewed it more as like incorporating that as like a storytelling element. Um, because some of the songs, like the lyrics were sort of giving you breadcrumbs to follow. Um, and for me it actually kind of worked. Some of the songs absolutely sucked, but a couple of them I was like, okay, I could see myself like listening to this on an old scratchy record player weeks from now. But I was I think I'm also glad that they didn't attempt to do that again in the remake because I feel like it's something that can only get a pass if it's like some old weird 70s movie.

SPEAKER_04 15:25

I think for me, my biggest surprise is just overall the way they treated the change between the original to the remake. I did not expect a line for line. I we didn't get one, but at the same time we did. It's very pr peculiar the way they chose to do this. They changed so many important parts, but then kept these specific, I mean, even specific lines, and you're like, this doesn't even apply to this movie anymore because that's from the old movie and you changed everything, so why not just come up with a new line for this? And overall, that is the thing that I was just like completely blown away by the the the choices that they made.

SPEAKER_01 16:04

Yeah, knowing what the 2006 version was about, and then watching the 1973 version, then watching the 2006 version again, and I know you guys weren't a fan, or you guys kind of thought it was very similar, but I didn't get that vibe. But there was like these strange points where I remembered that straight up line from the first one. I was like, oh wow, interesting. And it was like kind of like taking me back. I'm like, wait, are they is this like line for line, scene for scene? I was like, I'm so confused, but it kind of I like the way they took that source material.

SPEAKER_04 16:39

Yeah, I think what I don't understand is why make so many changes and then have the exact same like outcomes, you know? Okay, yeah, I get the point of changing anything.

SPEAKER_00 16:50

Yeah. Uh an episode or two ago, we talked about like covers of music, right? And like what's the like that same logic, what would be the point of like doing a new song? I actually didn't mind some of the the performance with those those original lines because it was given different context and it was given different tone. That being said, I think I would have liked seeing anybody but Nicolas Cage do it. If someone took this exact same script and treatment and it was given to a serious filmmaker with a serious cast, and they changed maybe just like a couple things about their approach, I think it'd be a way better movie.

SPEAKER_02 17:26

I feel like that's definitely true. And Alexis, I'm sure you'll agree with this, uh, but I'm curious to see if anyone else will. But I was super disappointed by the lack of like gore and death and like fear.

SPEAKER_04 17:37

I gotta agree. I feel like this isn't these aren't necessarily horror movies, these are kind of murder mysteries almost.

SPEAKER_01 17:44

I mean, you get some shocking, um I think it's more of the concept that's kind of shocking and uh not necessarily gory, but yeah, I I knew the 2006 version really wasn't, so I was like not expecting that for um the 73 version. Smart woman.

SPEAKER_00 18:01

Yeah. I mean, this movie applies fear in the time when it was scary to not be Christian, right? Like that's like the approach, like, oh, these heathens. So you have everything that was swelling around this time, right? Like, think early 70s, this is like pre-Texas Chainsaw Massacre. So you have these serial killers emerging, you have Vietnam, you have America growing up before your very eyes, and this is still a relative time of innocence in terms of cinema. And this is the time where like exploitative films started to really, really rise. And this isn't exploitation, this is mystery intention with a spiritual twist. This is just a couple years after Rosemary's baby. So it's it's horror, but it's horror in a different time for a different audience, but it's certainly not traditional horror or anything that I think I could ever be afraid of. Yep, I think we're all in agreement on that.

SPEAKER_02 18:52

We touched on this a little bit already, but I feel like all of the originality points that I gave to Mitsumar are now have to de facto go to uh Wicker Man, the original specifically.

SPEAKER_01 19:02

Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 19:04

To do that kind of like horror movie in broad daylight at that time was even more revolutionary than when I first saw Mitsumar in theaters decades later. So yeah, this is definitely getting some originality uh from me, partially because it inspired Midsumar. Uh, it also inspired one of my other favorite movies, Love Witch. Um, stylistically, there's a lot of different um like cinematic parallels. So this was sort of like uncovering an origin story for things that I'm already aware of.

SPEAKER_01 19:30

Yeah, I totally agree with that. I feel like there's a lot of movies now that I've seen this one, um, that have influences from other movies and a lot of these, you know, pagan, culty kind of, you know, movies. I'm like, oh wow, I can see a little bit um in I'm trying to think of some specifically, but Midsommar is an obvious um example. But even other ones too, I feel like they've got a lot of influence from this movie, which is surprising. So obviously this is original.

SPEAKER_04 20:01

Yeah, I mean, I of course you have to give the original the credit that it deserves. I'm I don't think that we saw anything before this that was like this, of course.

SPEAKER_00 20:11

That movie, uh the or the at least the original Wicker Man is iconic in its own right, and even though I never saw it, I think it's largely because it just falls out of the realm of horror that I'm into. It just feels very watered down. And I don't think it's any less valid, it's just not something that fills my cup, if you catch my drift. But in terms of originality, I think the remake is an interesting case because they made some decisions I'm not mad at. Like if they're gonna remake this movie, there are things that I'm disappointed they lost. But the overall approach, minus the final product you get on screen, like the decisions they made, the changes they made at the core of the film, I actually think isn't a bad way to remake this movie.

SPEAKER_02 20:48

The remake didn't feel particularly original, um, partially because we had just watched its source material.

SPEAKER_01 20:55

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 20:56

But also the original things that it did do felt also familiar. Like I don't think there's anything I saw in that movie that I'd never seen before.

SPEAKER_04 21:05

I agree. It felt very familiar aside from just the content.

SPEAKER_00 21:09

Alright, so look, maybe you folks don't give any credence to any uh any approach the remake may have done, but one of the things that the original is most iconic for, and honestly, one of the things that people remember about the remake is gonna be that ending.

SPEAKER_01 21:24

I think the twist, I already knew about it, but it definitely comes across in the first one way better, in my opinion. But um, I don't know, I I I like the ending. Um, I think the atmosphere um of the ending that the remake builds is a little bit better for me, but I don't know. I thought for what it was, um, it even though I had seen this before, it still um was surprising. So I for something that can transfer through time and you know, kind of be like Saw for me. Like Saw, I know what's going on, but I forget because there's a lot of bits and pieces in other parts of the movie. So So I applaud that part.

SPEAKER_04 22:01

I think the ending, especially having never seen either and watching the original first, I thought the ending was um honestly a great place to take the story. I I will say I knew what was coming. I knew what the twist was gonna be. Wow. Interesting. I mean, it's obvious, but I told I told Chris as we were watching, I said, Chris, it's obviously gonna be this, right? And she was like, eh, well, probably. And then I I feel like in the remake when they got to the ending, they were just like, Oh, you guys already saw the first one, right? You know what happened? I'll just give you a little brief bit of it. But it wasn't like they like it didn't have the the bite that it had in the original. It really just felt like uh, yeah, they told us we gotta do this, so we're gonna do this, and we're gonna use the same words, but you know, no big deal.

SPEAKER_01 22:44

Yeah, half of me is like, is it because we just watched it? But I feel like that that's not the reason why, though. I feel like it just don't hit the same. Yeah. It don't hit the same. I love that line.

SPEAKER_02 22:55

For me, I honestly, after such a long buildup, I needed this movie to end with explosive violence and like a lot of gore for it to be worth it. Um Ryan, I'm sure I found I I figured it out a little bit later than you, but at one point I was like, okay, it's probably this, and then it was, and I was like, okay, well, let's watch it and see how much that enjoyment I get from that. And I didn't get a lot. I was kind of underwhelmed. Um, but I have no doubt that like if I was around in the 70s and I watched this, I'd be telling everybody about it. I'd be like, oh my god, most iconic ending ever. Um but it's just like been something where I've been so desensitized over the years that like this kind of ending just isn't enough. I need more in both.

SPEAKER_00 23:35

I don't disagree in terms of like the showmanship of the ending, but I do think that the you know some of the the last images we see are pretty great. For me, the original's ending was just so unpleasant, it was almost haunting. Like it wasn't explosive violence or anything like that, but it certainly did make me feel uncomfortable. But I think that discomfort is because of how how hard they went on their religion angle. So it didn't hit the same at all in the remix ending, and it was just more disappointing. There is a little bit of a you know, with the difference that they take to the story and and the formula they use to get there, there's a little like, oh wow, even this is happening to to spark this whole thing. Uh so that was a little bit of a of a surprise, but overall I think the original had the better approach to the ending, and then the remake, I was like, oh, finally, so glad to see this happen. Wrap this shit up.

unknown 24:34

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 24:35

But the true question would be how these endings, how these approaches shake out in our scoring. But before we get there, Alexis, what's our body count for each movie?

SPEAKER_01 24:45

We have uh solo one person that dies in the original. But I know, right? But uh we do have four in the remake, so pat it a little bit. Still boo. Yeah, still boo. I know, I agree.

SPEAKER_04 25:03

But what about that animal report? Oh, let me tell you. This is 2021, not been a good year for the animal report. I take a week off, I come back, this is what I come here to. The original Wicker Man has a very, very unfortunate uh scene with animals. And you know, usually I'm here talking about the pups and the kitties, but animals are important, and on this island, uh, some bad things do happen to animals, unfortunately. The good news is in 2006 uh we have a clear animal report, nothing to worry about.

SPEAKER_00 25:35

All right then. Well, let's see how these scores shake out. Now let's start with the original, the 1973 The Wicker Man. Was it a hacker or slash?

SPEAKER_04 25:44

So this movie has so few things that interest me. And as a person who is frequently on this podcast talking about boobs, it's amazing to me that one of the things that I dislike about this movie the most is the amount of boob and sex it's sexual innuendo and uh implication in general, but it's it's just so in your face. I'm not down for the cult the sex cult vibes. It's just doesn't do it for me. And this movie is a lot of that, and then there's another side of this hyper-Christian man showing up onto an island for god only knows why. And I didn't like him either. I didn't like any of the things happening in this movie, I didn't like any of the themes happening in this movie. There were some animals that die at the end, you know. It's all it's all a little bit rough, and honestly, it's just a complete hack for me. This is not the worst movie we've had to watch on this podcast, but this is once again one of those movies. It's not hard to watch, it's not miserable, it's just not something I enjoyed. And that's my that's my hack here. Yeah, I was like, is that a hack?

SPEAKER_01 26:52

That's a hack. So funny because uh sex cults do do it for me. Um I know. Just kidding, just kidding. In all seriousness, I think it was a little oversaturated with the sexuality, but I saw that as um an app opportunity to build the themes, which y'all know I don't really pay attention to, but this is two weeks in a row that I've actually paid attention to like a little bit deeper things than uh surface level and gore stuff. But I think because there was no gore, I had to look at something else. So I I do like the themes that are going on, and you know, like you have this um sergeant that's coming in and just, you know, God this and you know, is extremely religious. So it's it's nice to see even when he at the end he's you know proclaiming some things, and I I just like that balance because you know, like whoever comes out on top at the end, which we can get into when we come up to spoilers, it's sh it's such a striking difference. So I thought that was cool. I'm not a fan of like older movies or like anything because I can't really relate, but when we watched House of Wax, I really enjoyed it, and I think this is something I'm really glad I watched because I definitely um am appreciating the source material a lot more than I had had I not seen it. So I'm giving this a slash actually. I kind of could have predicted that.

SPEAKER_02 28:13

So obviously, I expected this movie to be some bullshit and for me to not like it at all, but I actually really liked it. I am somebody who always enjoys almost every form of paganism in pop culture. Um so having so many scenes of like just beautiful women in their naked bodies, like dancing in the moonlight around a fire, like I could watch that all day. Get your life, mama. So I was super surprised how much I enjoyed this. Also visually, it was like so gorgeous. So many shots, had beautiful lighting, composition, it was very artfully done. And I feel like so many stills of this would make like beautiful like wall art. Um, I was obviously, like I said, disappointed in the ending. I wanted more violence and gore and blood. Um, but this is one where the build-up was so enjoyable that the kind of underwhelming ending didn't ruin it for me. Uh so I'm actually gonna slash this in a surprising turn of events.

SPEAKER_04 29:05

Literally, not a surprise. I would have put money on that.

SPEAKER_02 29:08

It surprised me.

SPEAKER_00 29:10

Me too.

SPEAKER_02 29:11

But if you see it now, it's like, oh, this is very much my brand.

SPEAKER_00 29:13

The second we got naked women women, I was like, oh, Paris is gonna love this. Uh-huh. So I struggle with this movie because I think I have a deep and profound respect for its place in history and and all of the influence that it has had. But again, this kind of vibe really isn't my style of horror. It's not something that I'm particularly into. What I think I I have to consider most is, you know, at the end of the day, like the themes in this movie, did they carry it enough for me to feel positively about it? And really the the thing that this movie hinges on for me is its themes of religion. And as someone who isn't even remotely religious, I really enjoy this movie's approach to balance and to see how you you have characters you know trying to assert their beliefs onto other people and judge other people and what the response is to that. So I feel like the the things I enjoyed the most about this movie are not even remotely in the horror category, save for maybe one scene. But honestly, the themes alone give it a slash for me.

SPEAKER_02 30:20

Oh wow.

SPEAKER_00 30:20

It's a bizarre experience. It's not one that I'm sure I I'll even watch again, but how about that 2006 version? Was The Wicker Man from 2006 a hackgrough slash?

SPEAKER_01 30:30

It's weird because I've seen this movie, I've seen it with my family, I've seen it with my stepdad, and I I've really enjoyed it the first few times I've watched it, but I think watching the original and then watching this just I mean, I I try to do it as a standalone, but I I just can't, honestly. And watching it this time, I was like, uh yeah, it's just not doing it for me. So I I wish there was something I could specifically say that was bad. I just didn't like the vibe. Nicolas Cage. Yeah, Nicolas Cage. I knew he was crazy in this though. But when I saw the detective or the sergeant from the first one, I was like, he was also kind of crazy. So he just Nicolas Cage is a tad bit more as freaking weird as the other guy was, but in a different way. So for the visuals, it was just they're going from the original to this one, and you have this sort of community that encapsulates these, you know, outdoor and like nature sort of vibes. It you don't get any of that. It's just focusing mostly on the characters and this mystery that's built, which I do like, but I just wish they had brought that nature element that they had in the original into this. And I think it just wasn't like standout performance from anyone except for James Franco, JK. But um, but necessarily nothing like stood out that like made this like a good movie that I would ever want to watch again, even though this is like my third time. But um, with that, it's getting a hack. Interesting.

SPEAKER_04 32:03

So I I I will point out some of the things that I think are hard to identify that make this kind of like lackluster. Thank you. Okay. So you go from this beautiful, friendly, loving, friendly not to strangers, but like this community feeling of this place that shouldn't exist the way that it does. And uh even though I didn't like the movie, there is a lot to be uh intrigued by in that original film. And then you go to this very gray place with a Nicolas Cage and watching him express emotions is like watching a table express emotions. Um, no one believes any of it. It's all real silly. So you get him, and then the characters are like kind of interesting, but at the same time, I I the matriarchy thing is completely it doesn't hit for me. Like for me, this this whole matriarchy vibe and like we just do whatever we want, it just feels like a cheaper version of the original. It's like we want to take that, but we're afraid to put boobs on screen, so let's just do it this way where the girls run the world, and it just doesn't do anything for me as a woman. Like you would think I would enjoy that. It and it just it just gets lost there. And they lose some of our interest in the story, in my opinion, by giving us more personal details and personal relations into this community, and so it really just starts to feel like a movie that you don't care about and you already know what's gonna happen because they haven't changed enough. Anyway, I'm going on and on. The point is, this is a hack, and this is a very, very bland movie, in my opinion. I can't see any reason you would need to watch this if you want to watch a movie, even though you, you know, I just disagreed with and said I it's a it's a hack for me, but you should watch the original. The remake is like an ABC family version of the original, not in content, but in quality. It's just not there.

SPEAKER_02 34:02

So this one is actually pretty tough for me. I came in to the podcast thinking I was gonna go one way, but now that we've talked more about it, I'm a little bit more on the fence. Uh I actually really enjoyed the matriarchy elements that the remake brought to the story, and I feel like there's some cultural background choices that they made that I enjoyed more than the original. Uh, and I think there's definitely a supercut of both of these movies where you take the best parts of each one and that one actually gets the biggest slash of all. But also, Nicolas Cage is truly just like an agent of chaos, and towards the end, just like really shits all over this movie and anything it tried to do. Like at one point it just gets stupid. And whenever something gets stupid, it really loses me, you know. At least I don't I don't know what what could have been different. Um So it's tough. It also had a lot of women in it that I love, like actresses that I'm a big fan of. Um did Nicolas Cage make this a hack? Uh yes, I'm not gonna recommend anybody watch this, but I will recommend they watch the original. Let's just call it a hack.

SPEAKER_01 34:59

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 35:00

Courtesy of Nicolas Cage specifically.

SPEAKER_00 35:02

Priceless, priceless. What a great place for you to land. Um he's actually very proud of his work and has defended this movie several times, which is hilarious to me.

SPEAKER_02 35:11

Well, this is the the viral thing that I was talking about. A few years ago, that video went around that was like Nicolas Cage overacting, and like half of the clips are from this movie. So I was like, wow.

SPEAKER_00 35:19

Yeah, he's like screaming, yeah. So here's the thing. This movie is infamous, it has a huge reputation. And a lot of movies, when they're so bad, they can be so good because it becomes funny to laugh at and laugh along with, but I failed to to laugh. And the first bit of overacting that I really, really felt and thought, you know what, that is the first like irr irrefutable moment that this man is acting ridiculous. He like jumps because someone knocks, but like the way that he was like, ah with his whole body, like just throws his hand up in the air, looks more like bothered, but also like he meant to seem surprised. It was just it was just a 200% on a scale where he should have been at 30%, and that is really dangerous for this movie. I a hundred percent agree, Paris, that there are a lot of things in this that you could like. And I'm not mad at the matriarchal approach of the remake, but I don't like the way it landed. I don't like the fact that it went a little bit too sinister in a lot of places because what happens is you also have thinly veiled misogyny in the remake that doesn't sit well, and I think if you took the same script and tweaked just a couple things and had some different talent in there, I think you could get one that doesn't ooze that subtext, right? I think you could do without it. But ultimately, I was looking for some maybe unintentional laughs, and I got zero. Lily Sobieski, I love, and she was probably one of the only shining moments of this movie. Also, there's like one main character that I actually enjoyed, but aside from that, it's it's a hack. I can't I have no intention of ever watching this again. I wouldn't recommend it to literally anybody ever. Even you out there listening, this person I've never met, listening to this podcast. Please don't do yourself the disservice of watching this movie.

SPEAKER_04 37:09

Agreed. And I can't believe I'm here again stopping us from another universal slash on the original.

SPEAKER_02 37:16

It's not for everybody.

SPEAKER_01 37:18

It's like the third time this year this has happened. I just mean my member my expectation was everyone's gonna hack this because of him. I was almost right. You're pretty much right.

SPEAKER_00 37:28

And there you have it, folks. Don't watch that remake because it was truly a universal hack, although its predecessor was just one vote shy of being a universal slash. But hey, Ryan's here to keep us honest. I'm trying so hard and it blows me away every time. Now you can find that original film streaming on Amazon Prime if you subscribe to their video service. Uh, but aside from that, check it out. Join us in the second half, and we'll catch up on the ridiculousness that is Nicolas Cage. See you in a bit.

SPEAKER_02 38:06

This summer, come visit Summer Isle. Located in Puget Sound and or somewhere in northern Scotland. Accommodations are kept clean, attractive, and comfortable to allow you to relax and enjoy your stay. During the day, take time to enjoy our state-of-the-art wellness facilities for facials, mud baths, and fertility treatments. At night, unwind with our guest entertainment, including nude moon bathing, fine dining, and our 24-hour communal sex grounds. We're also proud to offer free Wi-Fi and bees. Lots and lots of bees. Come get pagan on your next vacation at Summer Isle. Paid for by Summer Isle for the Gods by the women.

SPEAKER_01 39:21

For both movies, I can categorize them in the low gore section. Um, you have a few images, but not enough, I think, to make it anything other than low. And I know Paris mentioned like you wanted more gore at the end, and you said that would have been like the icing on the cake for you, or maybe the cherry on top.

SPEAKER_03 39:42

Both.

SPEAKER_01 39:43

Both? Okay, cool. But definitely there was intention, um, at least in the 1973 movie. So screenwriter Anthony Schaefer wanted this movie to be a little bit more literate um than the average horror movie. He specifically wanted a movie with minimum violence and gore. You know, he was tired of seeing these movies that just relied on uh viscera to be scary, so just scary images, like you know. So the focus of this movie was they were gonna have this abstract concept of um sacrifice, which I think that was done very fairly well. We get that end scene where it's it's it's an obvious sacrifice. So I think that just he just wanted to play on that sort of um scariness.

SPEAKER_04 40:26

Yeah, I find it really frustrating that that was such a specific intention in the original, and then in the remake, we get the scene of a girl getting hit by a bus with a really loud noise like five times, and it's like that is the cheapest sense of like scare that we could get, and that's like what they were avoiding in the original.

SPEAKER_01 40:46

Yeah, exactly. I was just like, oh, just I need a little bit more. But in the 2006 version, um, I don't know, did anyone see the uh alternate version somehow?

SPEAKER_02 40:56

Uh I saw A scene on YouTube.

SPEAKER_01 40:58

Yeah, I just saw A scene from the alternate version. Okay, so you may have been somewhat satisfied with the gore because in this alternate cut, uh, the villagers tackle and overpower Edward, viciously breaking his legs to prevent him from escaping and torturing him with these live bees. Um, which is I would like to have seen. I think we saw part of it just now, but yeah.

SPEAKER_02 41:21

It should have been kept in the main cut.

SPEAKER_00 41:23

Yeah, I think so too. I don't know. Nicholas Cage screaming, no, not the bees. It just it reminded me when I saw that one YouTube clip. It reminded me of Shrek, the gingerbread man. No, not the gum drop buttons.

SPEAKER_02 41:38

Do we think they cut it because he was doing the most?

SPEAKER_04 41:41

I I I would think so. He probably did the most then. Like all the things to cut because he was doing the most, that seems like the least offensive.

SPEAKER_02 41:50

I just uh during that same scene in like the the final cut, you hear the audio of some of it, and when he screams, my legs, I just cracked up. I was like, stop it, just stop, Nicholas.

SPEAKER_04 42:02

It was the worst. He's just like, My legs, my legs, and we're just like, Got it, they're hurting your legs. Understood, thank you.

SPEAKER_01 42:10

I know there is um kind of a lack of kills between the two. There's only five. Um so I don't know. I kind of want to talk about just and in general what you guys' thoughts were on those. Um, I know the pilot wasn't necessarily um from the 2006 version, wasn't necessarily my favorite, but I do like that I knew he had disappeared. Um, you you see Nicolas Cage go to the to the plane, and it's you know, all the contraptions are all messed up, and you know, someone clearly did not want the communication to get out. So I wasn't sure where it was going. And when I saw it, it was so shocking. It was like his fingertips were gone. Is that what we were looking at? And then his lips were like almost laced shut, but not quite. I I don't know. It was just a very jarring scene to see. I feel like he didn't deserve that feat, you know? But he'd been doing that. It literally was Nicolas Cage who put him in that predicament.

SPEAKER_04 43:08

No, I feel like it was the people because they had to get him there somehow. I feel like he had to be included. Oh, true.

SPEAKER_02 43:14

Why did they kill him if he did the thing they wanted him to do? He seemed valuable to them.

SPEAKER_00 43:18

He seemed valuable. But maybe he just wasn't in on the plan.

SPEAKER_02 43:23

Oh no, I don't think he was, but like couldn't you have just continued keeping him in the dark and having him bring you important goods?

SPEAKER_00 43:29

Except he saw Nicolas Cage, so it's like the loose end. I guess. Okay. But now this pilot is a loose end, so.

SPEAKER_02 43:36

Okay, that makes sense. And they just have to get a new pilot now.

SPEAKER_00 43:39

Poor planning. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 43:41

But I will say I I think that was like a it added to the climax in that movie. It was uh kind of necessary. It was an important part of it to add a little bit of gore where we were basically missing from having none.

SPEAKER_00 43:53

And speaking of jarring, I think the jar of like body parts was a little bit uh unappealing. Uh I thought, you know, I know it doesn't impact the gore score necessarily, but I still find it gross to see jarred pieces of people.

SPEAKER_01 44:08

The foreskins were terrifying, but the babies, because I was like, oh, is this what they do with the male babies?

SPEAKER_04 44:13

Also, technically, we saw lots of stabbing of little chocolate dolls. They a lot of them got like sliced. Well, two. There were two slices. But they took a specific bite out of one of those chocolate dolls from the crotch. She cut the legs and the belly and ate the crotch, and I was it was a small thing that was very important here.

SPEAKER_01 44:35

There was a lot of violence in this movie, too. You know, you have um Nicolas Cage punching a lot of people, like three women.

SPEAKER_02 44:45

Every time I didn't see it coming.

SPEAKER_00 44:47

I was like, wow, that's did it or did it not feel really fucking weird? Right? Like I get fighting a colony of people if you like you're in a position to do so, but also him just her making one smart ass remark hardly seems deserving of getting knocked the fuck out by Nicolas Cage.

SPEAKER_04 45:05

He's just decking women out here, this whole movie.

SPEAKER_02 45:08

Mostly unprovoked.

SPEAKER_04 45:10

I have a favorite not kill from the original, and it is the beheading of the hare. That was such an exciting scene because it it it felt like it was gonna be real. It felt like she was gonna be there. And then they were like walking through that. Um they said it what did they say? It's game of chance, basically. Everybody has to participate, and you have to stick your head in between the swords. Oh, it was so honestly, that was one of my favorite like parts of that movie, and I really did think that was gonna be a kill, and it wasn't.

SPEAKER_01 45:42

Yeah, it was interesting because I even though I had seen the 2006 version watching that, I was like, Oh, do they kill Rowan though? Like, what's going on? Imagine they did. It'd be so cool. Yeah. I mean, Lord, Lord, you know, but if they killed her, it'd be great.

SPEAKER_02 45:57

Also, what kind of game of chance is that? Do the boys decide that you're the one that they're gonna decapitate?

SPEAKER_01 46:03

I don't know. I think it when the song ends, that's kind of but you know, who ends the song? Also, I would be great at this. They wouldn't even be able they have to keep it at the same level. I I feel like that's fair.

SPEAKER_03 46:14

Oh, you're gonna use your short advantage?

SPEAKER_01 46:17

Yes. Yeah, I might duck down.

SPEAKER_00 46:18

I'm like, oh it'll sh back now. Like I love a good musical decapitation game. It's like musical chairs. That scene was for sure really tense, but I just I cannot tell you how satisfied I am by both deaths uh in like the endings of each movie. First off, I found the sergeant in the original film to be so unlikable, just so pompous, so pious. I couldn't fucking stand him. Douchey. I hated his haughty, like, have you not heard of Jesus? It's just come on, dude. Like clearly, these people are not Christian. What are you doing? So I absolutely could not stand his approach to literally anything. So to see him go at the end gave me a great sense of fulfillment. And then Nicolas Cage finally going, I do think it's a little fucked up that his daughter lit the fire. Oh, I love that. Honestly, I I just could not be more satisfied that both of them expired at the end of the movies.

SPEAKER_04 47:12

I think my beef is that in the original it felt like an eternity of watching the wicker man catch fire. I felt like we were like I knew it was happening, and I just felt like we were just there for so long.

SPEAKER_02 47:26

Yeah, just watching it in real time.

SPEAKER_04 47:27

And here's monologue. Yeah, that monologue it needed to happen. And then we got a duetted monologue where they're yelling and chanting one thing, and he's yelling and chanting from within the flames, and I'm just like, okay, I think we could be done here. However, a very beautiful sunset.

SPEAKER_02 47:45

True.

SPEAKER_04 47:45

A little golden hour lighting for that fire, so you know, no big deal.

SPEAKER_02 47:49

For me, both were just a little underwhelming. I think part of it is because they're burned alive, and I feel like that's such a lame sacrifice. Like almost all sacrifices involve blood. Like, give me a blood sacrifice. There's no blood when you burn alive. Plus, they say that it like kills all your nerve endings and it's not even that painful after a second.

SPEAKER_04 48:07

Yeah, suffocating, no big deal.

SPEAKER_02 48:09

I like the structure and like the drama and the production value of like going to all this effort to build like a 30-foot wicker man, literally the title, Q max saying, Look at this wicker man. But ultimately, like burning alive is kind of blah for me.

SPEAKER_04 48:23

Well, two things. While we were watching the movie, I said, They said the thing, they said the thing, they said the thing.

SPEAKER_02 48:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 48:29

And then also at the end of the original, the wicker man starts to fall while all the people are standing around. So it turns out no one makes it in the first one. We actually messed up the gore score.

SPEAKER_02 48:38

I was like, what if they just get like a bad downwind and like a huge chunk comes flying their way?

SPEAKER_04 48:43

They like show a bit like the head just starting to fall, and I was like, dude, that this is a dangerous situation. Y'all are on a mountainside, y'all need to run.

SPEAKER_02 48:50

It was fun that it was filled with animals.

SPEAKER_04 48:52

Fun.

SPEAKER_00 48:53

We all appreciate though that both of these men get there by plane, by air, and yet no one has seen the wicker man. So true. They've they're both so shocked at this monstrous construct, and yet they couldn't have seen it coming when they were in the sky.

SPEAKER_02 49:08

Wait, so you think it had already been built when they got there? I somehow, in my mind, they built it in the 24 hours that passed while he's there.

SPEAKER_00 49:15

That's what I thought. Oh no, that I feel like that takes way longer to build because they also had the orchid that cages and everything.

SPEAKER_02 49:21

You're right, it probably does.

SPEAKER_04 49:22

Well, I will say, in the remake, we do have the guy with the truck full of wood going up the up the mountain.

SPEAKER_01 49:29

I assume the men constructed it in the remake.

SPEAKER_00 49:33

Yeah, but not in the course of like a day. There are also very few men.

SPEAKER_02 49:36

Honestly, wait, isn't that what they do at Burning Man? I know nothing about Burning Man, but don't they actually burn like a giant male effigy?

SPEAKER_04 49:43

This had very much Burning Man vibes. Yeah. Especially because Burning Man is like very much built on your freedom.

SPEAKER_02 49:50

There we go.

SPEAKER_04 49:51

Your ability to do whatever you want to do.

SPEAKER_02 49:53

Dance naked around a fire.

SPEAKER_04 49:55

Exactly. Things are absolutely set on fire intentionally.

SPEAKER_02 49:58

Do any of us have Burning Man in our cultural zeitgeist?

SPEAKER_00 50:02

So I also looked up Burning Man, and it says that uh it has taken six days of 10 to 15 hour work sessions to build.

SPEAKER_02 50:09

Okay, in conclusion, they probably built it lying down and then erected it while he was there. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 50:15

And that was the gore you know. Um, sadly we didn't have too much, but um, hopefully next week we will have a lot more gore for you. We learned a lot.

SPEAKER_00 50:25

Sometimes we hope this, and sometimes it just doesn't happen. We just keep getting these non-gory movies on the schedule. But I will say that for as monstrous as that wicker man was, I do think it was the coolest looking thing in the film. In addition to the uh uh animal masks that we get. Very Pet Cemetery.

SPEAKER_04 50:42

So it's funny, I actually like the animal masks from the remake more because they have a very like it's weird. The masks from the remake feel like they match the aesthetic from the original movie. Huh. They they're doing a thing, but for me, it's my favorite visual element is the like flyover views that we have of the girls dancing over the fire. How could you hate on some naked fire jumping, you know, hoping to be impregnated by the flame gods or whatever they called it, you know? Like, and then once I realized what they were saying that they're hoping to, I thought it was like a ritual for fertility, not we hope to get pregnant by jumping over the fire. And when I realized that, I was like, oh, okay, this is great. This is great.

SPEAKER_01 51:25

My uh was kind of tied into it. So I really like the uh Lordship's house, it just had all these like little knickknacks and you know, just all this essentially like Victorian era like decor that I just liked looking. So also your homeboys from Lord of the Rings. So I was like, okay, of course he has all this stuff, but yeah, and then there's a nice shot um out to your favorite scene, Ryan, which I thought was really cool as well. But definitely I love the ambiance that this um house had.

SPEAKER_04 52:00

Yeah, that ambiance was so good.

SPEAKER_02 52:02

For me, the best visual element from the original just has to go to the use of lighting, especially in a lot of the low light shots. Um, I actually sent this to the group chat, but there's a screenshot I took uh of like just a naked woman like hugging and crying a over a tombstone, and it's shot at night, but it's still so like beautifully lit. Um, and really all the lighting in that like spooky graveyard orgy scene was really nice. I also really loved the kind of like Vaseline on the lens filter that they used during some of the aerial shots that you were mentioning, Ryan, of the girls dancing around the fire. Um I felt like it really added um just a quality to it that enhanced the the ambiance that they were creating in this culture on this island. So I feel like visually this is really just a blueprint for Midsommar, and I think in a lot of ways this movie did some things better.

SPEAKER_04 52:53

Yeah, the original is just so nice to look at, like from start to finish, and it has such like a natural feeling, and I think it matches what they were trying to do with the movie. And I have to say, in the remake, I felt like they took every artistic bit of visual element away and were like, let's make it orange and boring, and and I don't have a visual element that I enjoyed in the remake.

SPEAKER_01 53:18

Oh, you didn't like Sister Summer Isle's um Braveheart rendition at the end? Because that was my favorite visual. Her hair was my favorite visual element, okay?

SPEAKER_02 53:28

Her hair was good. The hair in both of these movies was actually solid.

SPEAKER_01 53:32

That was definitely my favorite, though. Love the, you know, gold and blue on the side. Definitely was getting Braveheart vibes for sure.

SPEAKER_00 53:41

You know what really stood out to me visually? And by really stood out to me, I meant looked really fucking ridiculous. Every letter, every piece of handwriting on that island in the remake is the most excessive dramatic calligraphy, and it is not realistic. Like honestly, if someone sent me that shit, I'd be like, oh, clearly someone looked up that I had a girlfriend once who left me and just, you know, typed up this letter and printed it on some thick cardstock.

SPEAKER_04 54:04

That's so unreadable. Truly. Just say you hated it, Paris. Be honest. No, I didn't.

SPEAKER_02 54:10

The remake visually, I loved how many beautiful women we got to enjoy in this, especially when we have Sister Summers Isle uh in her like glowing white bed scene. I was like, I don't know what purpose this serves, but work. I also really liked the hexagonal design of the apiary, and I feel like everything related to that would like looked really good. They got some good like uh overhead shots from there, even on the ground. I liked the way the they designed like the beekeeping costumes to give you kind of like um plague doctor vibes. Uh so I feel like those are some really solid stylistic choices.

SPEAKER_00 54:42

Would you like to know why that is?

SPEAKER_02 54:44

No. Yes, of course.

SPEAKER_00 54:47

It's because if anyone listens to or watches videos by CGB Gray on uh YouTube, it's because hexagons are the bestagons and they're the most efficient shape. I should have known that was coming.

SPEAKER_03 54:59

I did not know where we were going.

SPEAKER_00 55:01

She uses this joke once a week, and I still didn't see it coming. Hexagons are the bestagons. I will drop a link into the show notes. It's actually mind-blowing, but no, I I do appreciate the hexagonal design because it's a very big nod to Queen Bee.

SPEAKER_02 55:16

While we're talking about visuals, did anybody get vibes when we saw the Lord of Summer Isle in the original in his like May Day like lady boy guiche with the long wig? Did anybody think he kind of reminded them of Jonathan Van Ness from The New Queer Eye?

SPEAKER_04 55:32

I don't watch Queer Eye. You know your audience.

SPEAKER_02 55:35

Damn it. Someone at home is like, yes. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 55:39

Oh my gosh. He was definitely giving me um House of a Thousand Corpses, um, the brother that's in it with the hair.

SPEAKER_00 55:46

Like that's the vibes I was getting. If it's the guy that I'm thinking of from Queer Eye who has really long hair, then I would say yes, Paris, but I just don't watch enough queer eye to know with 100% confidence that's who you're talking about.

SPEAKER_02 55:59

It absolutely is because they had the same wig.

SPEAKER_00 56:02

Oh, okay. Well, great.

SPEAKER_02 56:03

And they were giving you like a gender-fluid vibe.

SPEAKER_00 56:05

Glad we had this journey together. Just taking in everything that you said about this visually, Paris, I want to go back to what you said about that woman in the graveyard hugging the tombstone, the headstone, just crying and naked. And I I think that's just a shining moment of how that whole movie is filled with a ton of memorable scenes, right? You have the classic music stopping as soon as a stranger walks into the bar. I think his his weird, almost seduced, horny virgin energy when he's doing his nighttime prayers and then is all of a sudden banging against the wall, like sweating. That was really bizarre and uncomfortable. But then to see him walk in on the public sex in that sex orgy, I just feel like I've never seen a movie full of so many moments where I'm just like, what's happening here?

SPEAKER_02 56:53

Yes, back to back, no less. It almost was unrelenting.

SPEAKER_01 56:57

Yeah, it's crazy. Like I know um Paris talked about that cemetery scene, the uh cemetery orgy, matter of fact. Um I kind of like that um scene, you know, or they go later on to he goes to explore and look for um a body, and they're going through these like headstones, and my favorite scene was that because I was reading the headstones, and like one of them says protected against ejaculation of serpents. And I said, Yes, yes. I don't know, it's just interesting. I just I kind of like the scenes like in the cemetery, especially that one to like read all those things and see how freaking ridiculous this is.

SPEAKER_04 57:37

I just want to know what that means. There were many little like nuggets, like, even I'm pretty confident that what they erase like on the chalkboard was like interesting, like everything in this movie was very intentional in the original specifically.

SPEAKER_02 57:50

One of them was like the hagstone protects us from the weird world, or something like that. And I was like, what is that lore?

SPEAKER_04 57:56

I wish I had read what he like before he erased it.

SPEAKER_02 57:59

I also wish I had a hagstone.

SPEAKER_04 58:01

I do need protection from the weird world, that's for sure. I think I pretty much already mentioned my favorite scene from the original, which is that like march, and then through the it's all like very serious and very choreographed as they're marching down, and then they go through the swords, which is like the end of that part of the ceremony, and then afterwards they, you know, after the hair is beheaded theoretically, and then they like rip off their outfits and go and like they're just like down to the beach for their party, you know, like everything's totally chill, like it's all very specific, very intentional, and then they're like, all right, time to party on the beach. And I enjoyed that a lot. It was it was one of the things that I did care about these people doing because most of the rest of it I was like, y'all are just trolling everyone. In the remake, I don't I I mean, I really don't want to be this like negative person on the podcast, but I really don't have a favorite scene. I cannot think of anything I enjoyed in this except for when Nicolas Cage finally dies and the movie's over.

SPEAKER_00 58:58

I have one because I thought it was hilarious. Okay, tell us. It's when he's running away with Rowan and then he answers the phone call, it doesn't work, so he's like, Alright, come on, let's go. And then literally one second later, he's like, Rowan, honey, slow down. Yeah, and it's just Rowan, slow down, honey. And like his voiceover carries as they transition to the next shot. And I'm like, What the fuck is this, man? You took two steps and you want her to slow down? She's right next to you.

SPEAKER_01 59:22

Yeah, and he like kept saying it, and I was like, Okay, we get it. She's running fast, and you you don't do much cardio, Nicolas Cage. You can't keep up, you know. One of my favorite scenes from the remake, and I just think because it's kind of scene for scene, was when he goes into the um school. And you know, I just like seeing that, you know, different play, like there wasn't um a bug in the desk, it was a like crow or something. Um, but I do like that. Um, I don't know, maybe I just wanted to hear like um a teacher talk about like phallic objects. I don't know, and why, you know, a poll, why it's called something, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04 1:00:00

See, that was one of those freaking cheap jump scares again, was the crow jumping out of the desk, and I was just like, come on, like give me something besides just a loud noise, because we just kept getting a car crash and a and animals making loud noises.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:14

And it's jump scare that Nicolas Cage does not know how to react to. It's as if they're on set saying, All right, loud noise, and then he's like, although there's a good moment when they finally leave that uh that little classroom, Alexis, and they go outside, and he's eventually asking, like, what happened to her? She's like, She's gonna burn to death. He's like, What'd you say? She said precisely what I meant to say. She burned to death. I don't know. I loved Sister Rose's uh energy in that scene. She seems like a really sharp-witted, doesn't take no bullshit from anyone kind of person. And honestly, you know, I I think some of the women were the best part of that remake. I think they're the only thing kind of keeping it together in any semblance.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:59

I totally agree.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:00

But see, Chris, to like go, uh not that I disagree with you there, but then if you think about the teacher from the original, and he's like, Is she in the church churchyard cemetery? And she says, No, she's not. And he's like, Where else is she? And she's like, the building connected to the ground with graves in front of it is not what we call a church. Like, okay, so yes, in the churchyard cemetery. Okay, very, very precise language. We get it.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:29

You know, and I absolutely love that. And I and whenever that moment when we were watching it, that was hilarious. And I do love her from the original. I just feel like that character in the remake is one of the only shining spots in that whole movie. It's like the only compliment I can give. I see, I see.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:44

I have to, I have to agree with you. That and Sister Summersile, that that was the only two characters that I could even give like a little bit of care about in the remake.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:53

Yeah, Sister Somersile giving her like backstory about the culture, um, and where it's kind of revealed that they made some changes to the lore. That was actually my favorite scene of the remake, just because I I was like, oh, okay, I'm a little bit down with this philosophy. You know, let the women make the choices, let them run the world, see how it goes. I think the boys have had plenty of time to show that they're not doing a great job. So I would honestly give this a good a good try.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:20

I'm sorry, you would give this a try? This community a good try?

SPEAKER_02 1:02:25

Uh absolutely, yes. Yeah, honestly.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:29

That have they don't you're not they don't care about you. You're getting your time.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:33

It's not about community. It's about the community.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:36

No, Paris, here's the thing though. It's too far to an extreme. You said the same thing about the fucking foundation. I did.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:42

I'm ready. Take me. Because what what we have happening now is not working.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:47

All things in balance. The best quote from this whole movie, right, is no, we love our men, we're just not subservient to them. But it's that message taken to an extreme, and it turns them into villains, which is not cool either, and not how you should demonstrate a matriarchal society. That's all I'm saying.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:04

I agree.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:06

The men weren't enslaved.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:08

They literally were. They literally were out hunting at the end of the movie. This matriarchy, the style of matriarchy, does not support women's growth. It defeats the whole approach of a matriarchy because it makes them villains. Exactly. It makes them do bad things. We're out hunting men.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:25

They were not villainous in my eyes at all. I was like, Yes, queens go.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:30

Because you are man and dark sided.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:33

But I gotta say, my favorite scene from the original was when Willow is just naked in her bed casting that spell and singing that song. When it first started, I was like, what the hell is happening? Because it was like the third or second song, and I was like, What is this? But then it kept going and it was like a full song and like dance sequence, and she's like going outside of his room on like every wall and like banging on it while she's like casting this like sexy little incantation. And apparently there was some drama behind the filming of that scene. This intel comes courtesy of Chris and her powerful research. But basically, the actress Britt Eklund, who played Willow, she was pregnant at the time and she didn't want to do like full nude scenes, like showing booty and everything. So she only did like the waist-up scenes, so she definitely showed boob, which I think is good for her. She had great boobs. But they used a body double secretly when she was done filming, and they like filmed all these extra scenes to make it look like she was fully nude. Um, and she was really mad about this because partially she didn't want people to see like her actual butt. She literally said, I didn't want to show my bottom, but I shot myself in the foot. They put the ugliest, biggest bottom in the world. Mine was much smaller and much nicer. I recently found out it was a stripper from Glasgow.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:43

Oh my god, can I say what a 70s thing to say about butts? Because that butt was great. That was a great butt. It had good shape.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:52

I thought it was a good butt too.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:53

It was a good butt, but back in the day, that is not the type of butt that white women were going for, okay?

SPEAKER_02 1:04:59

Apparently, also this stripper from Glasgow was supposed to like be in and out and like quick and then back to her life, but they found out like two weeks later that she was like still hanging out on set, having a good time with the crew.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:10

Uh, totally okay. She's a stripper. Yeah, exactly. What are you saying? I want to hear from her.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:16

I want to see that movie.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:17

This is part of her culture. So mine from like the remake, I mean, individually, would have to be. I like how they brought in Willow, and I know they needed a vehicle to get Nicolas Cage over. Um, but I like how they used that instead. Um, and then, you know, it gave a little bit more depth to um his character and hers, um, especially since she kind of looks like she's sad at the end for it. So, you know, I'm just like, but are you like, I don't know. Um, Lord Summer Isle from the original, um, loved the style, loved him, loved him as a character for some odd reason, loved his little getup looking like Prince. It's such a stark difference watching this. Movie because I knew the twist going in and watching the original first, I wasn't getting any of those clues that are so blatantly obvious when you watch newer movies that they're like, oh, they stop, they look another way. I mean, they look suspicious. The cast or the community in the original didn't give any clues of anything. So I really thought, I mean, they were playing the part all very well, and nothing looks suspicious. But you know, when you go to the remake, it was like, oh no, uh-uh-uh. And they're like tapping around. Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:35

It was like some Scooby-Doo. It just reminded me of Scooby-Doo a lot. No, that's totally fair. Man, okay, so that just reminds me. There's one moment that I really loved, and it's part of like I just liked Lily Sobieski in her portrayal of this. When he's having breakfast, he's like, Why store bar? Aren't you famous for your honey? She's like, I don't know. I just give what I'm giving. If you don't like it, take it up with someone else. And I just like I felt that so much. Clearly, she's not the one who manifests the fucking honey here. She's just tending to this pub.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:04

Honestly, Nicolas Cage had a lot to say to a lot of people about what they were doing.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:10

He really did.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:11

He's like, like, why aren't your shoes black? I'm like, bro, chill. I think since we're talking about characters, I want to mention an animal fact, which I don't always have interesting animal facts, but since we have a notable animal report, I felt like, you know, we can throw this in. So there are two conflicting stories about how the end of the original Wickerman went. And so Britt Eklund says some animals may have perished inside the burning Wicker Man.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:42

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:43

The same woman who didn't want her butt shown. Yes. And I gotta say, she seems a little crazy.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:48

She's spilling all the tea.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:49

So the important thing here is that the director, Robin Hardy, says that there were not animals inside the Wickerman when it was set on fire and it was all fake and nobody got hurt. Well, no animals got hurt. Um, so it's weird to have that kind of like back and forth. Like, why is that why is there even a concern? Why is it a question? There should be no fire and animals anywhere near each other. But it is interesting that uh a crazy actress from the 70s might not know what she's talking about, or she's spilling the tea.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:17

Also, Rod Stewart's girlfriend.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:19

What? Not surprising.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:21

That's so random.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:22

Yeah, he was like very insistent on trying to not get this movie released because of her being naked in it.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:27

And of course, that's Rod Stewart's place to decide.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:30

So she actually was a really interesting piece of the original. I do think I prefer her Willows to the more modern Willow, even though I do like the connection of like you know, her summoning her ex-fiance to the island and there being more of a reason for it. I did appreciate that. But I think in terms of characters for me, Lord Summerisle, the amazing Christopher Lee, yes, from Lord of the Rings, but also Count Dooku, also Willie Wonka's daddy in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, great guy, terrific stuff. He is undoubtedly the best part and the best character in that movie. I loved the humor and also how stoic he was when delivering certain lines. And I absolutely love that back and forth when Sergeant Howie's upset that these girls are jumping naked over the fire. He's like, Of course, it's much too dangerous to jump over a fire with your clothes on. Like, duh. So true. Yeah. And then yeah, Sergeant Howie is again talking to him about Jesus and Christ and uh Lord Summer Isles as himself the son of a virgin, impregnated, I believe, by a ghost. It just like he had a response for literally everything, and I just love this like tit for tat, not being super disrespectful, but also feels like he's going as aggressively as Sergeant Howie without you know taking a little bit too far. I know it sounds weird, he's charismatic, probably not the kind of person that you should like in this movie, but I think his performance was the best. And I actually love how committed he was. He did this movie for free. Oh, and for the press tour, he paid out of his own pocket so he could talk about this movie with anyone who would interview him about it. Oh wow.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:07

That's fun.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:08

I would like to note the comedy from like the troll comedy from the characters on the island in the original, absolutely worth it. And and those jokes did hit like when they would say stuff, you just like sit there for a second and then you're like, Oh, that was hilarious, but it takes a moment, you know?

SPEAKER_02 1:10:27

I totally agree. And I feel like a lot of those moments came from some of my favorite characters, obviously Willow, um, but also the teacher and like the clerk in the original were both just like very much not having this man's bullshit and being like, Well, this is the way we do things. You will need to get permission from somebody to access these documents. Um, so I like that they were being cheeky and also protective of the process.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:52

Yeah, and also uh they are absolutely right. You do need a fucking search warrant to do anything. Like, what are you doing? I loved in the remake when Sister Beach was like California business because this is Washington.

SPEAKER_02 1:11:06

We are out of your jurisdiction, Nicolas Cage.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:09

I would like to note this is not important, but I am looking through Nicolas Cage and his filmography. One, he was a part of Joe Exotic, his whole jam, which is seems very weird. Um, two, he's been on one billion different things. And three, I don't enjoy a single thing he's ever been in.

SPEAKER_02 1:11:29

Not even National Treasure?

SPEAKER_04 1:11:30

You know, Alexa said the same thing. Yeah, I don't even know if I've ever seen it.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:35

What? It's like the epitome of like a kid's movie that they're on a like a it's the only time history's ever been interesting to me.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:42

Yeah, I don't know. I think National Treasure came out when I was like more, like 14 or so. I can't remember exactly how old I was, but 2004. I don't know that I could actually enjoy it if I watched it again. Like I can't tell you with certainty that he was actually good in it.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:57

I think I saw it, and I think I have it existing somewhere parts in my brain, but everything else is like face off Conor, next Ghost Rider. Uh I did see Gone in 60 Seconds, but there's just so much bad stuff here. And there's some if you watch some old videos of uh Nicolas Cage, he's got like a completely different look and he loses it, of course, in another movie. And I actually just want to watch some of his old stuff.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:25

Yeah, it's interesting because I'm looking because I was like, there is a movie he is in that I've been wanting to see so bad. Um, and it's Mandy, which is a horror movie. So I was like interested. Has anyone seen that one? No.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:37

I haven't, but I've heard great things about it.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:39

Yeah, same. So, you know, he's probably screaming in that one, hopefully.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:43

I think he could play a good killer because he is so deranged.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:47

90% Rotten Tomatoes.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:49

Yeah, so I think the remake has a 14% of this movie.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:52

I would like to agree with the Rotten Tomatoes 14%.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:55

I enjoyed that almost all of the characters were recast as women in the remake.

SPEAKER_00 1:13:00

That's a fair assessment. Because just like Lord Summer Isle was the best part of the 1973 one for me, I think Sister Summers Isle was the best part of the 2006 remake. And the worst part of the 1973 version is going to be just Sergeant Howie's approach to life. Super big not fan.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:18

So I know you guys like the singing. Um, I that was the worst part about the original, in my opinion. And you have this like creepy, all these like creepy men in this bar talking about how they're all trying to get with the bartender, like the innkeeper's daughter. I was like, this is not right at all. That was odd.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:40

I think the thing is that's part of what they're doing, like they're doing it on purpose.

SPEAKER_02 1:13:45

They're like she did back that ass up on that big gross guy. That's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:49

She was she was a part of it. One, I don't know that they were that was actually his daughter, but if it was, that's like all that's a part of what they were doing. And I don't know, I don't know if it was only a joke for him or if that's just like how they are, but it was gross. But then when you like realize it's so forward that it had to be a troll, and then you start to pick up on all the other trolls, and it wasn't so bad, but in the moment it felt real gross. Well, that was the worst part for me.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:14

But like, I don't know, it felt gross. I didn't get that part, like I I just didn't, and then it, you know, a few scenes later or a scene um later, then she's singing in a bathtub. And I was like, oh my goodness, like it was just too much. And I was like, and I wasn't sure if this was a musical, but if there's one song, just one in a movie, it it constituted it constitutes a musical for me. And I do not like musicals at all, at all.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:41

I have to agree. A horror musical is something I did not ever need, ever.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:45

Wow, wait until we get the Rocky Horror Picture Show.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:48

I don't want it, it's different.

SPEAKER_02 1:14:49

Alexis, you actually just reminded me of the scene where in the original the cop is like going through literally everybody's house and opening every single door looking for the child, and he just like opens the door and sees like Willow in the tub, like just posed there provocatively, who's she was just like, Oops, you caught me, and then he just like walks out and leaves. That was a beautiful shot.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:09

Finally.

SPEAKER_02 1:15:10

Yeah. But the worst part of the original, I think definitely that bar scene was really rough, and I'm somebody who enjoyed the music elements. Um, but also the ending was super underwhelming, which I've said, and just the overall cop character as a protagonist. In both movies, really, I just found him to be so unlikable, and the whole time throughout each one, I was rooting for everybody else on this island except him.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:34

Yeah, I particularly hated when we get I've kind of already said this, but Nicholas Cage just keep seeing the girl get hit by a car everywhere he goes, and no additional information is given in one of those dreams. Like he dreams about that girl and daydreams about that girl like five, six, seven times.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:54

Every single one is nothing to do with the movie, like nothing, other than maybe giving his character a little bit of a backstory.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:02

That's not even a story, a quality. It's a little bit of guilt, a lot of guilt and a little bit of uh emotional unavailability.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:09

Oh we know that he understood the guilt when he was like not going back to work, taking a pill, like saying, Please don't, I don't need visitors. We got the guilt, like the first daydream. We did not need to see it so many times, and he just kept dreaming about this girl, and we were just like, Nobody cares.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:28

Wait, did they hammer out that detail because so he would they could say at the end he was the ultimate sacrifice? I don't know. Is that what they were trying to build on his character? Because I'm sure they couldn't just get some random well, I guess they were getting random dudes at the end, but well, he's tied to them because he's the father of yeah, and that's why I think that the end they said that like this is the greatest sacrifice like that we could give, because they had to give one because the year before previous there was no crop, there were no crops. Yeah, so that's the way I took it as I'm like, oh wow, this guy has a lot of grief, a lot of baggage, and now we're gonna bring it up, and now he's gonna know this is his daughter, and it's gonna be like him dying is just gonna be like not for them the worst thing, but for him the worst thing because he's like, Well, this is still my daughter, yeah. You know, she led you right to it. I still don't think we needed the daydream. Oh, we no, no, no, I don't I don't think we needed it at all because essentially that was me going very far out of my way to connect the two.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:27

Yeah, no, I don't think they're connected at all. I think the only connection there is that he because he has this guilt, he was very committed to the idea of helping another little girl that he couldn't save.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:36

I just that for me, like every time they showed it, and also I was watching with headphones on, and it was like real chill audio volume, and then a car crash every two minutes, and I was like, cool, I don't need to hear anything ever again, thank you.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:51

Truly the absurdity of a truck passing through on a ferry to run over a little girl several times. And then when he remembers it the first few times, he's remembering it as the memory of him on the ferry instead of just remembering the initial car accident in the first place.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:05

And then one time the girl is just not there and turns into bees, and you're like, okay, like what does it mean?

SPEAKER_00 1:18:12

Honestly, I think the better thing that he could have remembered was maybe perhaps, yeah, the car exploding as he's reaching for her hand through the glass. That might have made a little bit more sense. Yeah, agreed.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:24

Yeah, the damage that probably did. My favorite part I'd have to dig, and it would be the element that they have. I feel like you got a little bit more mystery per se, because there was, you know, you get this strung out, like detailed explanation of this community, and you get, you know, Willow, who's tied to Nicolas Cage and all this sort of stuff. So I like that. Um, part of it seemed a little bit more, um, but that was the only thing. I mean, nothing was like so great in this that was worth uh best part.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:00

I struggle with that too with the original.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:01

I think I can say one of my best parts is when they finally reveal that he's the sacrifice and they come running out of the cave and then they're like, Hey friend, thanks for coming here. We're really glad you made it because we were waiting for you. That was like satisfying because I saw it coming and I was um interested to see how they would handle it, and it was just, you know, Rowan running up and like, Did I do it right? It was a little uh cute, creepy moment.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:29

But was that cute, creepy moment enough to make you ever watch it again? Truly never.

SPEAKER_02 1:19:34

I would watch the original again, especially with somebody who has not seen it before. Um specifically, I have a friend who I texted about this movie to see if they have seen it because it's definitely right up their alley. Um, but I will not be watching the remake. Uh I will maybe watch the YouTube video with all the compilations of Nicolas Cage being ridiculous and punching people in the face. Um, but that's about it.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:55

Yeah, it's interesting because this uh remake I had watched a few times, but I think now watching the original source material like I previously mentioned, uh it kind of ruined it for me now. So now I would definitely watch the original, but I'm not giving the remake any time or energy or space in my life.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:13

Thank God. I can uh I can tell you that I will be watching the original one more time, and one time only that is to have my girlfriend watch it with me. And I'm never looking at Nicolas Cage in a bear costume punching women again. Not even in the compilation video. I'll watch the video of the bees, no, not the bees. That did not make it to the theatrical cut, but I have no intention of watching this full movie ever again. Oh, regardless of whether or not we'd watch either of these movies again, let's see how they fare when compared to each other. Which movie do you feel had the better visuals? OG.

SPEAKER_04 1:20:43

Original.

SPEAKER_02 1:20:44

Original.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:44

I'm gonna say original as well. It was way prettier. The white balance was far superior. What about the better story? I'll also go original.

SPEAKER_02 1:20:52

I feel like the remake, honestly, because they tied it in a little bit more with Willow. Um, I liked the culture changes that they made.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:59

Yeah, I'm definitely going with the remake for this one. I'm backing up, Ryan, on the original. I like that a lot of the changes from the remake, but I want to see them done better before I ever say it supersedes the original. And uh, I will also say that I do prefer the performances at large in the original. And that is the same for me. For sure.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:20

Oh, weird. I feel like if you like put your hand up and block Nicolas Cage out, everyone else gave a really great performance in the movie. So I'm gonna give it to the remake.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:30

Well, there we have it, folks. The original 1973 version of The Wickerman has just squeaked by as being vastly superior in every way, with the exception of a couple little elements uh regarding the story and the performances, excluding Nicolas Cage, uh, that Paris would prefer. Whether or not you watch both is entirely up to you. Now we've talked about a lot here. Obviously, the original Wicker Man was one vote shy of a universal slash, and the remake got a universal hack, but the conversation doesn't end here. There's so much more to both of these movies. I know that Festive Horror is a subgenre that we don't get to dig too deeply into besides this and perhaps Midsommar, but let us know what you think. We want to know where you stand on these. Are you one of the ones who brought the remake to cult fame because of Nicolas Cage and his unintentional humor? Now keep in mind there are a number of ways you can reach out to us, starting with our website, hackerslash.com, and on our social media accounts on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.

SPEAKER_04 1:22:28

And if you have an interesting Burning Man story or any Burning Man experience, we'd love to hear from you at our Hackerslash Hotline. You can leave us a voicemail at 757-606-0128, or visit hackerslash.com slash contact to send us an audio message. And also, if you're in a cult, you can send us an email. It's a feedback at hackerslash.com if they're okay with that kind of thing.

SPEAKER_02 1:22:50

And if you've enjoyed listening to this episode, you should definitely consider becoming one of our patrons. You can visit patreon.com slash hacker slash to earn cool perks for as low as $1 a month.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:59

We'll see you next time, folks, and remember don't respond to mysterious handwritten letters from your exes after they run away. Bye.