204: Pet Sematary (1989)

SPEAKER_01 0:04

The most she contributed was Nutcut. Greetings and salutations, and welcome to Hackerslash. If you're joining us again, welcome back. Do you know what a graveyard really is? If this is your first time listening, welcome to the party. We are a horror movie review podcast dedicated to telling you whether a movie is a hack.

SPEAKER_00 0:26

A total joke, a waste of time, or a slash.

SPEAKER_01 0:29

Totally killer pun intended. We believe horror is for everyone, and as such, we're rating these movies for the perspective we've gained from our varying walks of life and the flavors of fear we fancy most. My name is Chris, I'm your friendly neighborhood slasher enthusiast. This week I'm joined by the gore lover Lexus, Kiss Your Own Cat, and the Super Flash Space Guy Mac.

SPEAKER_00 0:50

No, it's your cat now.

SPEAKER_01 0:52

This week we're checking out the original film adaptation of a Stephen King property we originally covered back in episode 39. Before we continue digging up the past, though, we have some follow-up.

SPEAKER_00 1:02

We recently reviewed a movie called Child's Play 3, and we wanted to know what our listeners thought about it. So 79% of them slashed the movie, and 21% hacked it.

SPEAKER_02 1:14

That's not what I expected. Not what I expected either, but I was not on that, but I definitely am gonna go watch it.

SPEAKER_00 1:21

You absolutely should. I'm surprised. I thought it was gonna be more like lukewarm, but I'm glad that pretty much the majority of folks slashed it. Got a couple of comments from our patrons. Tony says, Childsplay 3 is not my favorite Chucky film, but it is definitely not my least. We'll get there, seed. But I've actually watched it more than a few times in the last few years, especially with COVID binges, Lila binges, and to prep for your review. I can say it is aging very well. I love the opening kill. I love the use of color and fog in the third act, Susperia vibes, and I love Chucky's lines, such as don't fuck with the Chuck. Nothing like a strangulation to keep the circulation going. You've got to be fucking kidding me, and presto, you're dead. It's a slash from me, and as Lila's personal favorite Chucky film, a slash from her too.

SPEAKER_02 2:05

I love that, and Chucky just says the darnest things all the time.

SPEAKER_00 2:08

Yeah, his his one his one-liners are absolute zingers in most cases. Now Amber says, the original Child's Play franchise is nostalgic for me. I was the youngest of my cousins, all horror fans, and the first three films were very strong in rotation during sleepovers. This installment wasn't the best, but it did have its moments, and I thought it offered a graceful handoff of the old theme to the new Campier direction the franchise took in the late 90s and early 2000s. Overall, I give this a soft slash. It doesn't give off strong slash vibes, but it's a solid attempt at capturing the mean-spiritedness of the original franchise.

SPEAKER_01 2:41

That's a very generous soft slash, and I appreciate that about you, Amber. I love the picture you've painted of the first three films being in a strong rotation uh during sleepovers. Now I really just want a hacker slash sleepover. That's honestly what I want. I want us to all get into our best PJs, get some sleeping bags in the living room, pop some popcorn, and watch some shitty horror movies.

SPEAKER_00 3:02

That sounds like the ultimate like patron perk.

SPEAKER_02 3:04

And Mac and I will pillow fight.

SPEAKER_00 3:06

Yeah, we will. Alright. Matt says, honestly, guys, Child's Play 3 is just something I want to get through with so we can talk about Bride. This is definitely Chucky's most boring film, and the masculinity of boot camp in military school just makes me feel uncomfortable. Maybe that was intentional, but I prefer the 90s Camp of Bride. If Ryan hasn't seen that yet, oh poor thing.

SPEAKER_01 3:25

Oh yeah, watch out, Ryan. But yeah, the masculinity of boot camp in military school. I'm sorry that it makes you uncomfortable. Obviously, we have too much experience with it on this podcast, given our whole B-Sides dedicated to military schools.

SPEAKER_00 3:38

And you know, we had some follow-up on that uh that section of B-Sides as well. Brittany replied and said, in reference to the B-side discussions, I don't believe we have these military-driven high school and college courses in Canada. Maybe we do, but I'm not aware of them. We do have Army cadets and air cadets, which are programs for those interested in those areas. Extracurricular, totally separate from school. I was briefly an air cadet, and at the age of 12 or 13, I got the opportunity to ride in and learn the basics of flying a glider. Pretty cool. Although I'm very much not a military type now, it was an interesting experience.

SPEAKER_01 4:10

We actually do have Civil Air Patrol, which sounds like it's close to air cadets in Canada.

SPEAKER_00 4:15

Civil Air Patrol isn't just for like kids and teens, though. I think they go all the way up through adults and they're actually like actively flying, which is really awesome. I wish I didn't develop horrible vertigo at the age of 25, uh, because I probably would have been an aviator myself. Uh, but to wrap up our follow-up, we want to say hello and thank you to Craig, one of our newest patrons.

SPEAKER_01 4:34

Hi. Thank you, Craig. Thanks, Craig.

SPEAKER_00 4:36

And that's our follow-up.

SPEAKER_01 4:37

Well, in 1989, audiences were introduced to a Mary Lambert film built from a screenplay Stephen King adapted from one of his novels. The original novel is the only one of King's novels he stated that has actually scared him. Perhaps because of how deeply linked it is to his own lived experiences. The story follows the Creed family, their cat church, and the role an ancient burial site plays in their lives when tragedy befalls them. This week we're talking about Pet Cemetery. Who's seen this one before? Oh, have I seen this?

SPEAKER_02 5:07

This is an abuela movie slash uh young adult. Not even young adult, young child Alexis. I remember Pet Cemetery on a VHS in my parents, and it just terrified me. And I remember watching it, uh, along with Chucky, surprisingly enough, and the made for TV It. Those three are very iconic in my childhood. So I this movie, definitely seen it once, definitely seen it a lot throughout my life, and extremely important in my childhood.

SPEAKER_00 5:36

This was another one of those movies that I think the sci-fi channel played a bunch. I know they played the sequel a lot because I saw that movie several times. So when I was like 12 or 13 or 14 or whatever it was, it was it was one of the few movies that I had easy access to because I had a TV in my own bedroom. Um, so I've seen this, I've seen the sequel, and obviously I've seen the remake as well.

SPEAKER_01 5:56

I had never seen this movie until it came time for the remake to come out. I will never forget sitting in the theater and seeing the trailer for that remake of Pet Cemetery with the drums and Alexis' excitement and how much joy radiated from her uh the moment we learned there'd be a new Pet Cemetery movie. Now, for that episode, I decided to get acquainted with the property by reading the book and then also watching this film. I've dropped a link in the show notes to that episode. Again, it's with our older cast, so it's a very different experience than it is from now. But it was a situation where I read the book, then so closely watched this movie, and I was heavily disappointed in this movie as it compared to the book. So coming into this episode, I was really excited to see if a few years of separation could help me out and almost create a clean slate of sorts so that I could reassess this movie on its own two legs. But what were you all expecting going into this?

SPEAKER_00 6:54

My expectations were were pretty simple, just creepy Stephen King goodness without the unnecessary flash of modern movies.

SPEAKER_02 7:01

Yeah, mine is pretty simple too. You know, I was actually kind of expecting to be bored a little bit just because I've seen this so often and I felt like I actually had seen this quite often and know what goes on. I think we know iconically what happens throughout this movie, but yeah, I was just expecting just a nice easy Sunday watch for me. But did it play out to be an easy watch for you? It actually did, you know, it was surprising the pace of this movie because I felt it was so good. Because an hour in, I'm like, oh wow, we're only hitting like the major plot right now. And then there's this whole, you know, resolution of the plot within another 45 minutes, I believe, or to an hour. So I was like, wow, it didn't feel like I was bored. So I'm glad I, you know, had that expectation and that fell flat.

SPEAKER_00 7:55

Yeah, it's it's definitely not a boring watch. I also watched it on a nice casual Sunday. Um, there's a certain level of tension there for me, though, because you know that animals and people are at risk of getting hurt at any time. And usually people aren't the problem, but animals, that's a line for me. If I know it could happen, that's bothersome. Um, but thankfully the film doesn't linger too too much on those those happenings. Uh, it's able to keep your attention and you know, it's just it kind of moves with this accelerated feeling of watching a train wreck, which definitely holds attention.

SPEAKER_01 8:30

Man, I'm sad to say that I actually was bored watching this movie. So sorry. I watched this on a casual Saturday afternoon, and it was a situation where I found myself still remembering all the things that this movie didn't do well for me the first time around. I kept trying to separate it. I think I was softened a little bit in some ways, but I had a really hard time reconciling the performances in this movie with the depth that I know the characters actually possessed in the original novel. And I don't even know that it's a hundred percent a shortcoming of the screenplay. More so it was just the outcome of the performances, like the final assembly of everything. That was a huge disappointment for me, yet again. One of the best parts about the original story, and I think one of the best parts about the remake that we eventually got was how centered and calibrated the story was on Lewis. And of all the Lewis's in this franchise, this Lewis feels the worst to me. Not that I dislike this guy as an actor, but it just it felt hollow and detached, and not in the way Lewis is supposed to feel hollow and detached, if that makes sense.

SPEAKER_02 9:39

Yeah, like you kind of want it to feel like a family, and it kind of just was like, maybe if you had more running time, but also like you mentioned, if if the actors had portrayed it better.

SPEAKER_01 9:48

I yeah, and I and I do feel like this is a family. There's moments of joy in this movie that feel better than the moments of joy we get in the remake, but it's everything else. It's all the subtext that's totally missing from here. It is the way that I can still like tear up a little bit at this movie because of me understanding logistically what's happening, but not because any of the performances compelled me to cry. It's me imagining, oh, what if this happened to anybody in my family? You know what I mean? So tapping into my empathy made me feel things, but this movie itself, the performances in it didn't.

SPEAKER_02 10:26

That's interesting because I feel like one of the characters in particular, you see this kind of I don't, it's not a transformation, but you see this conflict of you know, death and how you know it's presented and explained. And I think watching this, you know, for the millionth time, not millionth, but you guys know what I mean. It's just been a lot of views, but being able to actually see that and recognize that and pick it up on this watch. But you know, I was super surprised and happy about how much I thought I knew about this movie and how much I remember, but how much more there is to this movie and how many deaths are in this movie. I only thought there was just a few, but we'll get to that later on. But I was surprised on the number because what I remember, even though I've seen this a lot, was thought it was significantly less.

SPEAKER_00 11:19

I'll say it was a weird experience for me because I think I had my memory soured um by Pet Cemetery 2 because that's the one that I saw more often than this one. And the most recent one I've seen is the remake. So, you know, I was just expecting a bunch of made-up crap that didn't need to be in the movie because that's kind of how I felt about Pet Cemetery 2. But I didn't get that. You know, I was I was very surprised by how similar this movie is to the remake. Now I don't know how they compared to the book because I didn't read them, um, but they felt like there was some consistency there in some of the major plot points, or at least the you know, the flow of the story.

SPEAKER_01 11:55

I can agree that there's some consistencies there, but one of the things that wasn't consistent is how much less I felt in terms of fear. Now, this isn't a movie that gets you a lot with jump scares or anything like that. I think the remake even was slightly more successful with that. But this one has a terrifying situation and it asks you terrifying questions, and yet it felt so hollow and empty that I couldn't be terrified by them. Even with the ways they cover certain aspects of the novel that get left out in the remake, it just felt disconnected for me. It felt like I should be scared more so of a concept, but not by anything that I actually see unfolding, which is I think is a problem. When you have a novel that Stephen King himself is afraid of or scared of because of the terrifying realities of it, but you don't make a scary movie, what are we doing here?

SPEAKER_00 12:48

Yeah, I I think the takeaway for me in terms of fear is just like being afraid of trucks and cars zooming down your street. And that and it's not really related to any of any fear in the movie itself. It's just like, man, it would really suck if someone or someone that I cared about got hit by a car or a truck.

SPEAKER_01 13:06

Ah. Pet Cemetery, a movie that can be solved by fences.

SPEAKER_00 13:09

I had the same thought while watching it.

SPEAKER_02 13:11

So obviously when I was younger, I thought this movie was terrifying. Especially a certain scene, and now to me it is the goofiest thing I've ever seen. But I don't know, maybe it's just the way I feel about death in particular, which is really gruesome to say, I guess. But it's a scary thought, in my opinion. So the fact that I see a character dealing with this, but then I also see one character just being so nonchalant about the effects certain things have. It's you know, it's not terrifying, but it is like suspenseful in that sort of sense. But honestly, this reminds me a lot of every other Stephen King. He has this aura about him that a lot of his movies seem to be the same. And the backstory behind this cemetery is very similar to a lot of movies. So was it original? I mean, it felt original for the idea, but it seemed like someone, and if anyone could have crafted this.

SPEAKER_00 14:17

Uh that okay. Wow. So I don't know that I agree.

SPEAKER_02 14:20

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 14:20

I think it's pretty darn original. I think it is kind of a monolith, especially for horror literature. I I definitely stands alone. Now, does he have common themes through many of his works? Absolutely. Uh, sometimes they come back, like comes to mind. I think it gets full of originality points.

SPEAKER_01 14:37

Okay, I would agree with that, Mac, but I'm gonna deduct a couple originality points. Uh, and it's not gonna make sense that I'm doing that specifically because it does some shit that is not in the book, and it does some shit that is a deviation from the story that I dislike. So it's not enough to make a film adaptation of this incredibly singular original novel, but to then sully it with bits and bobs that don't necessarily have a significant stake in the book, it frustrates me to no end because we lose so much of what was significant to the book and what could have made the movie feel that much more original in terms of its adaptation on screen. And that disappoints me. Now, another thing that disappoints me is this ending. It's one of the ones that it's there, it's gruesome, I get it. I think I was happy that the movie was over, but it still didn't feel like a satisfying conclusion to things. And I can't grapple with exactly why I feel that way. Maybe it by then it was just the sum of all the feelings I had watching this movie up until that point. But I will say there's a bit of good gore there that's fucking gross.

SPEAKER_02 15:48

Yeah, I will say the success of the ending was great because of the gore, but to me it was a little lackluster. It was like, oh, okay, this happens, I get it. Possibly I I think it's cool, but also there's no repercussions in this movie. I mean, there is, but not for a certain character, and like I like some character development, and I just didn't get any. And I thought I would see it at least at the end, and I didn't, so that kind of just left me with a bad taste in my mouth.

SPEAKER_00 16:18

Yeah, the the ending was meh. I mean, I heard the book was more open-ended when it comes to like the final scene, but like it it wraps up this movie effectively enough. I just don't like I don't like not having final conclusive moments of a film. I need it to be everything on screen, nothing left to the imagination, and that's because I'm boring.

SPEAKER_01 16:39

Okay, well, I will say that I did feel like based on the sound you get after the image disappears, I feel like my mind is made up on what happened. But I think any semi-positive feeling I could take from that was absolutely stomped by the remake's ending. Because it does just give this greater sense of wow, it's so horrific and it's gonna get worse even after the movie.

SPEAKER_00 17:08

And that's that's a really good ending. If you're going to leave things open, you know, it's like a zombie movie. If you're gonna kill all the zombies and humans are gonna survive, like that's fine. But if you're not gonna do it, everyone has to become a zombie. You don't have to show me that happening though. You just have to hint to it. So I think when you when you get to choose like what you're gonna show and what you're not gonna show, and what you leave to the imagination, either let my imagination explode, which this one doesn't, or absolutely seal the deal on everything, which this one doesn't exactly.

SPEAKER_01 17:37

You're right, it doesn't exactly, but it does for sure rack up some kills. So let's go ahead and start making our way to our ratings. But before we actually score this movie, Alexis, what's our body count?

SPEAKER_02 17:48

So I said I was expecting something less. So for some reason I was expecting two deaths in this movie. Clearly not. We actually have six deaths in this movie.

SPEAKER_00 17:56

That sounds right.

SPEAKER_02 17:56

More than meets the eye. But what about the animal report? That's what we're really here for. Oh, we're definitely here for that. And this wouldn't be a movie called Pet Cemetery if it wasn't bad. So fear warning to all our furry friend lovers out there. This one's a bad one.

SPEAKER_01 18:11

All right, well, let's go ahead and get into our ratings then. Pet Cemetery from 1989, the original adaptation of a Stephen King classic. Was it a hacker slash? So this is a slash.

SPEAKER_02 18:20

This movie to me just holds something near and dear to my heart. And I know all of us can relate and have those movies. I watched this as a kid, it terrified me when I was younger. And now it just holds a memory that I just love. And I love when movies can do that for you. Although the plot is very simplistic in this movie, maybe there's not too much development in the characters. I'm fine with that because I feel like it's a good watch. It's a good movie to say, hey, you should watch this if you're just getting into horror, but you're okay with some gore. Because there's a lot of gore in this, more than I remember. Every watch, I feel like I don't expect that. So I was happy about that. But damn, those makeup effects were fucking astonishing. And I can't wait to talk about that later because that was one of my favorite parts of this movie was actually seeing it, because typically it's just so chaotic when you see a death, but this you can like appreciate the death. So for that, it's getting a slash.

SPEAKER_00 19:21

I'm I'm gonna jump on board with Team Slash here, but not because of nostalgia uh in any way. I just my memories of this movie aren't as strong as they are for the sequel and the remake. Um, this movie is pretty unique in that the first two-thirds of the movie I think are far better than the last third, but it still earns a slash from me. I think, you know, by the time we get to like the climax, you've pretty much seen all the best bits of the movie, and then the climax and and beyond are um, you know, they're okay. But I think even though it's not perfect for a Stephen King movie, and I don't know that we've seen one yet, I really wish Stephen King could just wear every hat and make everything happen in a film. But alas, we don't live in a perfect world. Um I think for what we what you get in 1989, it's it's not too bad. It's better than we can expect for that era, especially when translating Stephen King's works to film. Um it's it's a good movie. It's if you looked on the like the meter for me, it's it's not close to middle, it's between middle and and and great, but not quite great. It's it's just good enough.

SPEAKER_01 20:26

Just good enough. What a glowing review. I already stated that uh I've had some ill will towards this movie. And for those who listened in episode 39, you know that I was the only one who turned out to be a fan of the remake, and I also shared in that episode that I would have hacked this movie because I hated this movie. Time has softened me a bit, for sure. Watching that movie immediately after finishing the book was such a bad move on my part, which I don't think is true for every single book and movie combination. The Shining, you know, again, I think the the book made me appreciate more elements of the movie, even though I still feel like the movie doesn't do it justice. But this one is a very singular experience in how disappointed the book made me in this film. And I think that's because the book made me cry. It was chilling, it was heavy and gripping in emotional ways. And I think walking into this time, knowing that I'm just not gonna get that, I felt like I could allow myself to have fun with this, as morbid as that sounds. But the performances were so hollow, I couldn't have fun with it. I tried getting into it and I just couldn't get into it. There's one solid performance in this, and this little gauge, little Miko Hughes. Solid child acting, absolutely brilliant. The cats who played church, absolutely brilliant. But ultimately, even on a second watch, this movie is still a hack. I don't hate it, I for sure don't hate it anymore, but it's not something I care to revisit. And with that, Pet Cemetery from 1989 has earned two slashes and one hack. Now you can find this movie streaming currently on the US version of Netflix. There's also a really dope documentary called Unearthed and Untold: The Path to Pet Cemetery that is also worth a watch. So check it out, then join us in the second half so we can get through the spoilers together. See you in a bit.

SPEAKER_00 22:24

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SPEAKER_01 23:24

Alexis, what's the gore score for this movie?

SPEAKER_02 23:26

Yeah, this score has more than I remember. A lot more. And you know, it's it's pretty bad. It's high, in my opinion. You s don't see a lot in the beginning, but once you see Victor, it he just keeps popping up and popping up. And then the kills start happening, and it's just in your face at that point.

SPEAKER_01 23:46

Man, I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 23:47

Feels real medium to me, but I respect it. Medium? Okay, I I would say light, but I was like, let me go for our viewers, what they would think. That's fair. It is sudden when you see Victor.

SPEAKER_00 23:59

You know what it's like? It's like when a recipe tells you to turn your your stove to medium high and then water boils in like 10 seconds. You're like, wait, is that medium high or is that just high?

SPEAKER_01 24:08

That's exactly what it is.

SPEAKER_02 24:10

It was just interesting. It had like the flaps hanging down, like it continuously got grosser as we watched this movie, The Gore.

SPEAKER_01 24:17

Oh yeah, with that pussy leaking eye. Disgusting.

SPEAKER_02 24:20

Yes, that was so gross. But what was your guys' favorite death?

SPEAKER_01 24:24

Okay, look. It's gotta be Judd. Achilles? Like really sliced heavily into it, then slashed in the mo mouth, and then little gauge eating him like a zombie. Ooh, it's the most theatric death.

SPEAKER_02 24:36

It was really theatric. And it that was what got me when I was a kid. When he first comes at him in the scene with it in his hand, I was like, uh it was just it's creepy when he's in the dress. It's creepy, but it's funny now. Because I'm like, why? I was just very confused at that moment.

SPEAKER_00 24:55

It's the most memorable death, that's for sure. I mean, I was trying to think of like who else even died in this movie because when you think about it, that's the one that really sticks out. I did not remember going to this movie that Rachel died, like it didn't add up when we got there.

SPEAKER_01 25:11

She deserved better.

SPEAKER_00 25:12

Yeah. You know what's so sad? Denise Crosby uh played one of the best Star Trek um The Next Generation characters called uh Natasha Yar, or maybe just Tasha Yar, I'm sorry, but uh she also had a really uncalled for death, and it was really bad that they wrote her off in that way. And it felt to me, it was like triggering. It was it was like that all over again. Like, how dare you take her out in this way? I'll say it's my favorite simply because it was very impactful, even though Judd is the clear favorite to have.

SPEAKER_01 25:44

It was absolutely devastating, though, to just think about what she saw and what she felt and all this confusion, and then she's dead. You know what I mean? How awful just having to grapple with the the aftermath of losing your little baby boy, and then all of a sudden, you got got by him. You're like, he's alive.

SPEAKER_02 26:03

No, not quite, and he's coming after me. You guys have done some great ones. I could go for, yes, Judd, iconic. I love it. It's gruesome. It hits me in places I never thought I'd get hit. But I want to give Missy some credit in this movie because she doesn't get anything. I mean, did she need to get anything though? Absolutely not. I mean, so Chris, I wonder, is the book have a little bit more explanation behind her character?

SPEAKER_01 26:30

Yeah, Alexis, it's a good question. I mean, so in the book, we have Judd's wife Norma, and in the movie she's completely removed, and Missy is her stand-in.

SPEAKER_02 26:40

Interesting. Yeah, I feel like she doesn't get any credit, but then I also feel like she's kind of thrown in. But it was just an interesting dynamic to, you know, for her to kill herself because she thought she had a cancer. And I was just wondering how this kind of tied into the movie. So to me, it was like kind of intriguing a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 26:57

I could have done without it. The most she contributed was nut that.

SPEAKER_02 27:01

She she was very topsy turvy, if I were to say anything. Like, I was like, uh, ish is this appropriate?

SPEAKER_00 27:07

She she was crass a little bit, but I felt that she was there because they were showing that the kids were having to learn about death all of a sudden. And and it was just like, here's another example, kids. You're gonna have to learn about it now, not sooner, not later, right now.

SPEAKER_02 27:22

Yeah, when you move to Connecticut, you're just there's dust surrounding you, pretty much.

SPEAKER_00 27:26

I mean, with like economically, yeah.

unknown 27:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 27:31

Well, going along with gore, my favorite visual is definitely the look of Victor and Zelda throughout this entire movie, and it is what really makes my skin crawl, and what really was memorable from my childhood. Zelda is terrifying. And the only thing I can compare her to is Twilight when Bella is dying and becoming a vampire.

SPEAKER_01 27:55

Spoiler alert. Yes. Spoiler alert. Sorry if you haven't seen Twilight.

SPEAKER_02 28:00

And that transformation is crazy, but just seeing like the actor who portrayed Zelda is just like body like composition and like theatrics with the body of movement, it was terrifying. And then just the hollowness of the face, and it to me was what stuck out in this movie. But also, you have Victor, and from the first time you see Victor, his head is like messed up, and I thought they would at least kind of cover it up a little bit, but they don't. And I like it because in certain scenes the skin is just flapping out. I'm like, this is great. And to me, it wasn't overdone, and I just was mesmerized by that, and then also the look of Rachel as well at the end with the oozing, just the amount of detail that went into that. I appreciate that visual so much of all three of those characters and their those specific, like deathly necrotic looks.

SPEAKER_01 29:01

Okay, so here's the thing I could do with less skin flaps and ooze, but this is what separates you and I. We're just built differently. I will say one of the best things about this movie visually, though, is its set design. Specifically, the Creed household and the pet cemetery itself. I absolutely love how old and worn the cemetery is. Everything from the extreme close-ups that we get in the opening credits, as you hear the kids giving their speeches to their pets, including Judd and you know his his good boy spot, to the shot that we get entering the cemetery where you have the misspelled pet cemetery up top. It is so haunting, so beautiful, and so somber. Absolutely nailed it.

SPEAKER_00 29:47

It really does go to prove Judd's point, though, that this is not supposed to be necessarily a sad place. This is supposed to be a place of rest and you know coming together with your with your fallen heroes, your your good boys. My favorite visual aspect of this movie, this one's coming out of left field for me, but it's the cinematography. It had such excellent use of slow zooms and slow pans. We got POV shots like the one we got from the coffin. Um, just like great feelings of creepiness, thanks to just really moving fluidly with characters when they're walking slowly. Um, or I don't know if you caught that one, Chris, but using subtle Dutch angles to keep things feeling kind of slightly off.

SPEAKER_01 30:30

The cinematography is not one that I felt stood out in a particularly good way. What did stand out in a good way was absolutely one single moment of Lewis's performance, and it's when he injects Gage. And it was the culmination and like the the the swelling of emotion that I would have loved to see or semi-feel leading up to this. I think the closest we get is the actual funeral. His reaction screaming no when Gage was hit. He obviously looks looks distraught, but for some reason it didn't click for me as as high quality. But in this moment when he's injecting Gage and Gage so cutely just says, no fair, no fair, and he's like drunk tumbling backwards and hitting his head and just like looking. It's so fucking sad. And little Miko, I I did tear up watching that. Um, again, excellent child actor, but the way that he looks at him, the way that Lewis looks at Gage, and his eyes are swelling with tears, and it's just horrowing. That was the best moment of his performance, and I think that made for the best scene because it's the closest I got to feeling like, yes, this is what Pet Cemetery really is.

SPEAKER_00 31:48

I'm glad you picked something that was actually very serious, you know, because I gravitated towards something that was almost like comic relief. Actually, I kind of think it was.

SPEAKER_01 31:59

Was it the casket cracking open?

SPEAKER_00 32:01

No, that was intense, of course. Um, it was it was good old Pascal traveling home with Rachel and all the little interjections along the way. You know, she's like trying to get back and they're trying to get the rental car, and he's like throwing in a line here or there, or they're gonna shut the truck door, and and you know, he has to say something before he he fades off into nothingness. Just like every step along the way that he's like having his little influence was kind of funny because it also it seems like is he actually having an influence on things, or is he just like there commenting? It kind of seems like he's just there commenting, which makes it even funnier because he's just he he gave me some major in American werewolf vibes, and I kind of enjoyed that.

SPEAKER_02 32:43

I could totally see that. I do like the comic relief of Victor, but also Ellie. You know, Ellie, this cute little innocent girl in her voice, and you know, talking about nuts, and I was like, this is so fun.

SPEAKER_00 32:56

Like so, my second favorite scene, I was almost tempted to choose this one, was like the picnic scene and how she reacts when Gage loses the kite. She like flips it.

SPEAKER_02 33:08

You have siblings, you know how it is. Start screaming at them for no reason.

SPEAKER_00 33:14

I don't even remember what she called them. She called them like a numb something or other, but it was hilarious.

SPEAKER_01 33:18

Think about that being the last thing you say about your little brother before he dies.

SPEAKER_00 33:21

That's true though. She must feel horrible.

SPEAKER_01 33:24

And oh my god, okay, I know that I've said the performances aren't great. Her performance is solid as like a lovable young but big sister. Absolutely adored her. It broke my heart when she's holding on to his picture and Judd wants to look at it, and she's like, I have to keep his things ready for him. I'm gonna sit him sit in his chair. Kids saying shit like that on screen should never fucking happen because it's just because it's just too painful. Uh but thinking about this now, right? That scene where she he looses the kite and she's just saying all this awful shit, you're absolutely right. It is the totally innocuous, like it's a totally normal moment between siblings, and she doesn't even realize what's about to happen.

SPEAKER_02 34:06

So sad. Yeah, and her, you know, grappling with her brother's death is it's it's sad. It really is. And my favorite scene is definitely have to be when Lewis and Ellie are talking about like what happens after you die. And I think because not that I'm on some spiritual thing, and I'm not gonna go into this in the podcast, but you know, sometimes like I do think about that, and I go down a deep path, and it usually leads to some not something bad, but just my head just starts spinning. You know, I know some people have different beliefs, and I feel like that's where I'm like trying to figure out where I stand. But anyway, I thought it was cool that Lewis was, you know, just acting like a parent and just putting it all the bullshit kind of aside and like telling her his opinion and not trying to sugarcoat it or anything. I mean, I don't know the appropriate age you talk to your children about this, but as someone who's older, I looked at it, I was like, oh, this might be a learning like point in my life. Like, don't try to sugarcoat it, maybe, but just say it in an appropriate way. And then, you know, you see Rachel listening in the background, and I was like, is she gonna say something? Like step in, but she, you know, she's just smiling. So seeing that interaction between that family was kind of great.

SPEAKER_01 35:19

Yeah, see, well, something that I think you're hitting at here, which is really important and which is why this movie is so disappointing for me, is because there are so many themes of that. Just that very question, what happens to you when you're gone? How do you reconcile that either with your beliefs or the reality of losing something or someone you love? Stephen King wrote 374 fucking pages exploring this idea, right? Interfering with natural order, man's attempt to play God, loss, grief, mortality, the intensity of denial we find ourselves in in the aftermath of loss, like the human tendency to spiral into obsession with death and loss, and the acceptance of loss versus the resistance to it. It's tough because the advantage that his words have written on paper over this movie is the ability to let the reader into everyone's minds, right? Uh, voiceover for characters' thoughts doesn't translate well. And I think we lost so much of that in this movie. And I think that moment is an example of that because Lewis is someone who grapples with a kind of like a stoicism. So the entire story rests on his shoulders, uh, and we're supposed to be able to like crawl through these deepest, darkest, saddest, most painful parts of his mind. And there's specifically a moment where in the book, after Gage passes away, Lewis begins working through the temptation of like resurrection in his mind. And we learn that Gage had a scare in his infancy that posed serious questions about like his potential quality of life. So he thought about, you know, I'm gonna compare what might have happened to Gage against the condition he could be in if he resurrected. And then when thinking back to that turbulent time, he asked Rachel if she thought she'd be able to love Gage, even if he had accessibility needs. She, like really emotionally, painfully, desperately, acknowledges that she would have loved him unconditionally. He would have been home with them, and that would have been enough for her. So there was like that critical point in Los in Lewis's decision making, right? It shows his process of rationalizing what was previously unthinkable in his mind, like you can't fucking resurrect people. And he runs through the logistics with a degree of separation that tricks him into believing he could handle Gage the same way he could handle any patient during his career. And that's just the depth and the richness of the story that I did not get from Lewis in this movie. Really fucking disappointing.

SPEAKER_02 37:46

Yeah, there wasn't a lot, which I don't know if that to me was a bad thing because it's just an because it's such an easy watch, but I do see if I had read the book that I would be disappointed in that. Because, you know, I don't really have much to say about the characters besides, you know, Ellie's funny. But I do have to make a comment because Paris is not on this episode, that Rachel literally has the best style in this in the any movie I've seen so far. Like very like she steps out and she has, you know, in the opening scene this polka dot dress, white sneakers, matching headband, you know, plaid blazer, you know, floral dress with a straw hat. I'm I'm I'm for this vibe right now.

SPEAKER_00 38:29

I uh the wardrobe in this movie is no game. Like I almost threw it out there as a best visual element because it's it's pretty good, especially when they get gauged that strange little outfit. I don't even know what that was, but like dude was dressed up and ready to kill.

SPEAKER_01 38:45

So he's dressed up like Zelda was in the painting. So like when kids die, they used to paint them in really fancy ways and fancy attire to like capture their memory. That's why he was wearing that. Because in the home, when Rachel is running down from Zelda's room, she runs past a painting of Zelda who developed her medical condition in her youth.

SPEAKER_00 39:08

I can definitely see how depth was missing though, overall from the film. I know it's hard, and I think we've gotten used to it now. We're kind of spoiled because we're used to seeing depth depicted more often now in films. Somehow within two hours, you're able to do like a better job of it. Um in in the 80s and 90s, it wasn't necessarily like a priority, and it wasn't necessarily easy to do, and it probably seemed like a really big ask of the viewers at the time, compared to most other most other films at least. Um, I think we did get our moments of you know, some characters going a little bit deeper, but but most of them did seem like pretty two-dimensional or or pretty shallow. I mean, especially Judd, like you don't get a lot of motivation from Judd. Even when he's saying this is why I did it, it still like makes you wonder like, but why did you do it though?

SPEAKER_02 40:00

Yeah, I have in my notes that it was just his intentions to me were not very clear at all. And I was questioning whether he was a bad or good guy.

SPEAKER_01 40:09

So the framing of this is that he's the bad angel while Pascal is the good angel, despite their outward appearances. But really, Judd's not a malicious character. And I think this is what's missing, right? We miss how fond he becomes of Ellie, and we miss his intentions and his grappling and his reasons for bringing that motive because he really did just think Ellie wasn't ready to lose her favorite cat, and he felt pity.

SPEAKER_02 40:39

So, Mac, you were talking about how you liked this dress that Gage was in. And to me, that was the worst part of this movie. I think I hit like it was a serious note my entire life. And in my most recent viewings, just to me, it's been so comical. And I don't know if it's a good comical, because to me, like it's just been a serious movie, and it still is a serious movie. So I was like, why do you have him in a dress? But Chris, you made a good point, so I'm just gonna toss this as my you know, worst part.

SPEAKER_00 41:10

And in my worst part of this movie, you could also kind of toss out, um, but it's it's it's kind of central to Pet Cemetery. Animals and kids getting hurt. Like it's obviously necessary for the story to exist and to work, but it's not an enjoyable aspect of the film.

SPEAKER_01 41:28

I agree with that wholeheartedly. And I, in fact, will raise your two gripes with one compliment. And that was the way we saw the shining in each of these characters, particularly Ellie. I know that the book and the film really alludes to the cinematic universe, right? So in the book, we have the passing of uh Rachel passes a sign for Salem's Lot, and we have a Cujo connection in both the movie and the book, but really Ellie's ability to have those dreams and have those premonitions and have this like psychic connection ties it back into Stephen King's literary universe. I do deeply appreciate that. I do want to see more of that explored. I can say definitively that I won't be watching this movie again. I will 100% watch the remake again, and I would be open to watching another version of this, and definitely the rest of the sequels.

SPEAKER_00 42:22

I think this movie, this is gonna it's not really exactly rewatch, but it kind of makes me now want to read the book.

SPEAKER_02 42:28

I totally agree with that. I mean, this movie I've been re-watching for a while, so I'm gonna continue. And I'm actually gonna give the 2019 version uh another watch.

SPEAKER_01 42:38

You know, Hackerslash is here for second chances.

SPEAKER_00 42:40

So is Alexis.

SPEAKER_01 42:42

Well, I'm glad to hear that you're gonna give the remake a second chance, but for now, let's see what other richness we can get from this adaptation with Max Factor Fiction.

SPEAKER_00 42:50

Number one, Herman Munster himself, Fred Gwynn, was excited that the role of Judd did not require him to dye his hair black, like his most famous monstrous role.

SPEAKER_02 42:59

Uh, fact.

SPEAKER_00 43:00

It's all topsy turvy. His hair is actually naturally black, at least at this point in his life, so he had to keep dying it white while shooting.

SPEAKER_02 43:07

Wow. Alright, you go, Judd.

SPEAKER_00 43:09

Number two, the scene where Pascal says, Don't make me tell you twice, had to be filmed again because they realized Dale Midkiff was too sexy sleeping shirtless in bed.

SPEAKER_02 43:18

Ah, you're you're staring at me, I don't know. Uh, it's fiction. He's not that sexy.

SPEAKER_00 43:24

I'm sorry, but this one is a fact. He was too sexy.

SPEAKER_01 43:27

Fuck, I'm messing up on all these. Okay, look, for as much shit as I talked about him, he actually is pretty handsome. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 43:34

Number three, when Zombie Gage handled the scalpel in the inning scenes, he had to be coached constantly as to not accidentally hurt himself or the other actors. The young actor broke down after one attempt at filming, so they instead switched him to a dull scalpel.

SPEAKER_02 43:47

This whole thing has me topsy turvy because I was like, why wouldn't they even give a kid a scalpel? Um, but I bet this is uh fact.

SPEAKER_00 43:56

Well, this one is fiction, but they just gave him a dull scalpel to begin with because he's a child.

SPEAKER_02 44:00

That thing didn't look that dull, by the way. Why are you like, ugh, just weird.

SPEAKER_00 44:05

No, what's really cool is the times where there was blood involved, that's when they switched him to the fake gauge so that they wouldn't like traumatize him.

SPEAKER_02 44:12

Yeah, I feel like he probably got somewhat traumatized in this movie.

SPEAKER_00 44:15

I wonder how old he was when he first got to watch himself in this film. And number four, Stephen King was a big Ramones fan and invited them over to his house when they toured New England. He gave a copy of the Pet Cemetery novel to Didi Ramon, who immediately went off and read it and came back with the lyrics for the hit Ramone song named after the book.

SPEAKER_02 44:33

Too many details, Mac. This is a fiction.

SPEAKER_00 44:37

So sorry. This one is indeed a fact. And we even got two Ramones songs in the credits, so yeah, dude is a fan.

SPEAKER_02 44:43

Clearly isn't paying attention, and what the hell, I didn't get anything right.

SPEAKER_00 44:46

Hey, Sheen is a punk rocker, and this has been Fact or Fiction.

SPEAKER_01 44:49

Well, there you have it, folks. Pet Cemetery from 1989 has earned two slashes and one hack. Now we've certainly had a robust discussion here, but it doesn't end here by any means. We want to know what you think. Where do you stand on the original Pet Cemetery? Let us know. You can join in on the conversation by hanging out with us for free in our Discord server. Now you can click the link in our show notes to sign up.

SPEAKER_00 45:11

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