239: The Return of the Living Dead (1985)

SPEAKER_04 0:04

Have you never bit somebody with love?

SPEAKER_02 0:11

Greetings and salutations, and welcome to the spooky season with Hack or Slash. If you're joining us again, welcome back. I think things are getting out of hand. If this is your first time listening, welcome to the party. We are a horror movie review podcast dedicated to telling you whether a movie is a hack. A total joke, a waste of time, or a slash.

SPEAKER_00 0:28

Totally killer, unintended.

SPEAKER_02 0:30

We believe horror is for everyone, and as such, we're rating these movies with the perspective we've gained from our varying walks of life and the flavors of fear we fancy most. My name is Chris, I'm your friendly neighborhood slasher enthusiast. This week I'm joined by the Superfly Space Guy Mac.

SPEAKER_00 0:44

Why do you eat people?

SPEAKER_02 0:46

The cowardly creeper Ryan. Christ Ethel, I don't know, and a new friend, Vero. What's up, chicken shit? This episode and the entirety of our 2022 spooky season is brought to you by our friends at Comstrips. Comstrips is helping us celebrate our 2022 theme of comfort horror. And in that spirit, today's film is a comfort pick from Vero herself. Before we snuggle up on the couch, though, we'd love for you to get to know our new friend a bit better. Vero, obviously you're a huge horror fan. I've known this about you personally, but what is your connection to the horror genre and how deep does your love of horror run?

SPEAKER_04 1:20

Um, I think it definitely is the first thing that I say when I introduce myself is uh what's up? I like horror. Uh, but I grew up in like the punk rock hardcore scene, and I think it was just like part of it, to be honest. I I don't think we talked about anything else but like straight edge, being vegan, and horror. I think that that was like the requirements for me to date you in like the 2000s. You had to be all three. Uh, but I think, you know, I just I love the art piece of it. I'm like the one that loves the gore, wants to see the bloods and guts and all that. So um I think it's just part of me, obviously. If you see what's behind me, I genuinely collect it.

SPEAKER_03 2:01

Okay, so you kind of just mentioned it, but the the most important question is what's your style of horror?

SPEAKER_04 2:07

It needs blood, guts, and gore. I think that that's a hundred percent what it requires for me to like it. I do like the comedy though. Like I need the ridiculous kind of like 80s goofy comedy. Uh I think that if I could describe like a scene in a movie, it would be the the scene of the raining blood at the end of Evil Dead, the remake. It's so unnecessary, but exactly what I need. Um, I would live in that scene forever. Just keep reining blood.

SPEAKER_00 2:37

Oh, too much blood. Too much core. I mean, I I do like that scene. You're definitely like a good counter to Chris and I who um could do without blood entirely.

SPEAKER_04 2:47

So yeah.

SPEAKER_00 2:48

I I respect that.

SPEAKER_04 2:49

On a I I want to see people die and come back to life. So they can die again. So they can die again. You're a psychopath. Yeah, I know. I said that really like seriously. I'm kidding. I don't want to see people die.

SPEAKER_00 3:01

On in movies, it's different. You know, you're allowed to like it when you watch it in in horror movies, but not real life, of course. But yeah. So I've mentioned before my favorite horror movie of all time is probably like The Exorcist. So not necessarily bloody, but pretty disgusting and oozy with you know, vomit from demons. What is your favorite horror movie?

SPEAKER_04 3:18

Dead Alive is all-time favorite. I'm wearing this shirt. It's a Peter Jackson movie, which is already pretty killer. Uh, but anything that is like funny, ridiculous, might not ever happen. Uh, but I need I need that gore. I need babies kind of like ripping their heads out and all of that stuff. I was so unprepared for that movie when we reviewed it. Oh my god. It's uh it's crazy. It's uh it has no sense whatsoever, but that's probably why I like it.

SPEAKER_02 3:47

My favorite part of this is you just saying, I need babies ripping their heads out, and then Ryan just not even acknowledging that directly and going back to Dead Alive.

SPEAKER_03 3:56

I mean, uh they're on the same, you know, those are on the same level. Those two things, Dead Alive and that happening, same exact thing.

SPEAKER_02 4:02

Okay, but Vera, have you ever seen Terrifier? No. Oh okay, you're gonna have to. Need to? Okay. Oh, you're a hot dog slice virgin. Terrifier 2 is coming out.

SPEAKER_04 4:13

Okay, okay. What year did it come out? I'm I'm like I'm 80s. Recently-ish, yeah. It was in the last seven years or so. Ryan's so uncomfortable, and I don't know why, but I'm I like it.

SPEAKER_03 4:25

You'll see. There's a thing that happens in Terrifier that has been referenced probably more than anything else on this show. I don't know if y'all agree, but the hot dog slice is infamous. It it lives on through us every week. Oh, I'm excited.

SPEAKER_04 4:40

I'm putting that on the list.

SPEAKER_02 4:42

We're gonna have to do a rewind of Terrifier for the sequel to come out. So it's gonna be good. Obviously, you're joining us now, you're part of the Hackerslash family. I think one of the most important things that we need to know to kind of calibrate what your opinion holds and how to weigh that. How do you personally define a hack and a slash?

SPEAKER_04 5:00

Okay, so for me, a hack has to like not have any type of emotion. I feel like I definitely would just sit there and not even care that it was on. So, like, not scary, not funny, not spooky or gory. And I think for me, a slash is like a knee slapper, one that like has me cringing, which is really tough to do. So it's a movie that I want to watch over and over again. And I know we're gonna talk about like comfort movies, but for me, I am somebody that repeats movies literally all the time. Like I go to sleep watching movies that I've seen already a thousand times. Chris, you've seen me like I'm just sitting in the break room, you know, watching, you know, Return of the Living Dead or something just for comfort. And I think that that's the that's the slash piece for me. It's something that you want to keep watching. Um, and you can tell and talk to people about it with just like actual comfort.

SPEAKER_02 5:56

I'd also like to point out that when I was in your home, I saw a piece of merch from Sleepaway Camp 3, Teenage Wasteland. Yes. So uh I think that's a good that's a good moniker or a good hallmark of what's to come from you. For sure. For sure.

SPEAKER_03 6:09

Okay, one more question though, specific with that. How what are your feelings about uh emotional horror? Like when it's when when they're just pulling on all your hard strings, you know, making you making you stressed out, sad, not super gory, just like a deep, deep horror movie.

SPEAKER_04 6:25

I get over things really quickly. So if it's not like right away, if you're making me think for too long or I have to figure it out and it's not within five seconds, I'm instantly and on to the next. I don't know. I don't want to be sad when I'm watching a movie. Same. I want to like leave and be like, oh, that was fun, you know? Yeah, no, I don't like the emotional ones. I'm also like not, it's tough for me to be like, I'm sorry, you know, I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. Like, I don't do any of that. So I feel like if something emotional will happen in the movie, I'd be like, okay, that happened. All right. Love's horror movies doesn't say sorry, got it. And does a lot of things to s that you should say sorry about. That's pretty much don't we all the caption.

SPEAKER_00 7:09

I am picking up a vibe. I think I've mentioned it previously when I was in college. I saw a band, an Alabama band called Cancer Slug, play in a place called the Hangnail, and I feel like that would be your scene.

SPEAKER_04 7:21

Yeah, I love all of those words. Yeah, I don't know what they are, but I love all of those words.

SPEAKER_00 7:26

They want it to be misfits, but they wanted to make it grungier and grosser. A lot of vibes.

SPEAKER_04 7:32

I'm into crust punks. I would never date crust punks, but I kind of married a crust punk, but he's clean now. He was a crust punk and now he's clean. Sorry. Is that a genre of people? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's literally this movie. This is what you would call crust punks. Oh, bless.

SPEAKER_00 7:51

I mean, when your name is trash, literally trash.

SPEAKER_02 7:54

Literally. Well, thank you so much for joining us this week, Vero, and for sharing your love of the genre and your comfort horror movie with us, and I'm so excited to dig into it. Now, to set the stage, in 1985, the undergoing audiences saw a film that was originally conceptualized as a sequel to George A. Romero's seminal 1968 classic, Night of the Living Dead, which we've covered here on the show before. But when John A. Russo and Romero parted ways after their 1968 production, they decided to move in their own directions for the sequels. So Russo would own the Living Dead series, and Romero would own the Dead series. Russo published a novel in 1978 that served as a sequel to the original film. And he also adapted a screenplay of the novel, but after the script was purchased by an independent producer, things took a turn. The man who was eventually chosen to direct the film, Dan O'Bannon, refused to direct it as it was written, and he dared not attempt a serious take on a Night of the Living Dead sequel, and instead chose to create a world in which the original exists as a movie based on true events. Now ultimately, the world experienced a film in which only loosely resembled Nrusso's novel, and instead fed us a comedic romp that popularized the notion of zombies eating brains. This film explores the aftermath of two medical supply warehouse employees accidentally releasing a deadly vapor into the air. A vapor which causes the dead to rise again. This week we're talking about the return of the living dead. Vera, why is this your comfort movie?

SPEAKER_04 9:26

Okay, so as someone that suffers from anxiety, I feel like this is something that definitely makes me calm. I know I'm a psychopath. We've established that already. Um, but I I want to be able to like a movie and the play-by-play of this movie. I know every single thing. I want to be friends with all of those crust punks. Uh I would hang out with trash and I would date Suicide or Freddy. I date any of them. Um, Tarman to me is like cute, which is really weird. And I know that I said this to Chris, but um, I don't know. I just love him. He like is the funnest zombie ever. Uh, and you kind of see his skin peel off in this movie, and all of that makes me excited. So I just watch it all over and over again. And the second one, too. I'm kind of like the entire one, like the whole thing I love.

SPEAKER_02 10:21

Awesome. Well, we'll see if it proves to be as comforting for the rest of us. But who's seen this one before?

SPEAKER_03 10:27

Do I need to answer that question? Y'all know I haven't seen this.

SPEAKER_00 10:30

I I have not seen it either. I was honestly completely unaware of that whole distinction between the dead movies and the of the dead movies. Had no idea, did not realize that this was going to be completely like unrelated. I mean slightly related, but like not a direct sequel of you know Night of the Living Dead. Had no idea.

SPEAKER_02 10:51

Yeah, I've never seen this movie in its entirety, which is disappointing because I thought I had. And as I was watching it, I realized that I've only seen uh like the iconic grave dance scene, I've seen plenty of Tarman clips, but never this whole thing start to finish. So going into this, I expected this to be a goofy, gory time while not topping my uh my my list of all-time zombie movies. I I thought it would give me plenty of charming moments, but MacRay, what were you expecting?

SPEAKER_00 11:19

I didn't watch a trailer or anything. I didn't read anything about it. I just saw the title and then I saw the year, and I expected zombies and cheese, whether it was cheesy lines or cheesy effects. I just expected it to be really cheesy.

SPEAKER_03 11:33

You know, I also was in a situation I didn't really expect anything. I was expecting a sequel to Knight of the Living Dead, which I was quite uncertain of how they would approach that. I I didn't have much, you know, zombies. I was expecting zombies in the 80s.

SPEAKER_04 11:48

I think that's the only expectation you actually should have going into this movie. I think if you expect too much, you would for sure be bummed. Like first scene, you'd be like, what is happening? But I think the reality is, is a lot of people think it's Night of the Living Dead. So if you just say, like, hey, have you seen this movie? A lot of people say yes, and then you say Tarman and they're like, wait a minute, I have no idea what you're talking about. But it's a good one. I think it's like one of the most colorful like movies that I've seen in a long time.

SPEAKER_02 12:18

I think colorful is a really interesting way to describe this movie. Man, I was like sitting down for this and thinking, okay, it's gonna be goo goofy, it's gonna be gory. And I'll admit, Barrel, like I was actually thoroughly entertained watching this and is expected really charm to like the effects, but more so the 80s music. I enjoyed that. How was this most recent watch for you after having seen this like a million times?

SPEAKER_04 12:42

So one of my favorite songs, there is a scene when a dead person is coming out of the grave and uh, do you want a party comes on like at the perfect time that the skeleton opens his mouth, so you kind of feel like he's singing the song and he's just like asking you if you want to party, which is pretty funny. The score is perfect, you know, the dancing in the graves, everything about it is very 80s. So somebody that was born in the 80s, this is like, oh, home, this is what it's like. Oh, yes, welcome back. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 13:14

Yeah. Vera, listen, I'm gonna be honest here, okay. I there's there's no hiding it, okay. 80s fun hot mess movies are not my vibe. So all of the uh all of the charming things that you've shared about how much you love uh Dead Alive and why you love it and everything, every part of my body is like, why? How could you? That's insane. You know, during this movie I thought it was really funny because about part way through, like, like when the gang of like kids roll up, I'm just I literally think I rolled my eyes. And then part way through I was like, why am I having a good time? Why am I entertained by this? So I guess my main feeling while I was watching it was being entertained and honestly just like interested to see where things were going because it we went on a journey here. There's a lot of things that happen, and it's not quite as much chaos as dead alive.

SPEAKER_04 14:09

Yeah. I feel like if you don't like fun, you wouldn't like this movie. Agreed. I'm glad you like fun, Ryan. Thanks. Because I thought you were gonna say that you didn't like fun and then I've been bummed out. I think no expectations going into this movie is definitely what you have to do. And that's just like a pro tip for life. If you have no expectations, you'll never be upset. So maybe you guys should all do that because it makes me super happy to not have any expectations. Not a bad point. I'm telling you. I don't need I don't need a hug either. I hate hugs, just so everybody's aware. Also same.

SPEAKER_00 14:45

I did not know, just like you, Ryan, I did not know that this movie was down to have fun, and it was a pleasant surprise because I came into this thinking, I don't know, it's gonna be 80s, it's gonna be cheesy, it's gonna be related perhaps to Night of the Living Dead. I'm probably gonna hate it because you know they're trying too hard and it's gonna be ridiculous. But I didn't realize that they were like deliberately trying to be ridiculous in a fun way, and so that was again a huge pleasant surprise while watching this because I was like, oh, this movie's just like we're just here to have a good time, and I'm down for that, especially when it comes to zombies. After watching 30 million seasons of The Walking Dead where everyone's just constantly upset, you need a little break from that attitude, you need to have a little fun with it.

SPEAKER_04 15:25

Yeah, uh, you also should watch this like just in a dark room because there is scenes that are like super, super dark. Um, so you miss some things if you if you don't have that, but I don't know, it makes me want to be a bad kid, and I was a bad kid, so it just makes me want to continue to be a bad kid.

SPEAKER_02 15:43

Oh, circle right back around to being a bad adult.

SPEAKER_04 15:45

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I'm like, I didn't care when I was younger, and then like as soon as I realized I could get arrested, then I I did at least did it a little bit uh more subtle. But when I was like a a kid, kid, nah man, I would I I didn't care.

SPEAKER_02 16:02

Rules, what are they? How do they work? Yeah, exactly. Mac, you mentioned uh a pleasant surprise. I think one of the most pleasant surprises for me is how I felt about the goopiness in this movie because it manages to not be too gross, which is a very delicate balance to strike, especially as someone who doesn't really like gore at all. And at some points I was actually reminded, particular, particularly from by Tarman, of the Father's Day cake short from Creep Show. And there were also like a couple moments where I winced slightly, but I spent the majority of the time smiling or laughing with the movie as opposed to at its expense. And I think the comedy actually ages really well.

SPEAKER_04 16:43

Yeah, I I think the best way for me to describe it is like all of this movie is unnecessary. Like it's it's okay if none of this ever actually happens, or if it does, either way, but it's unnecessary. There's so much mess in this movie. Um, and to be fair, this is Dan uh O'Bannon's first movie that he directed. So like he's already fun because he likes being a mess. Like to make this your first movie and already just be ridiculous and a hot mess is pretty awesome, I think.

SPEAKER_03 17:16

Yeah, this is definitely fun. And it it is good to just start out this way. And Chris, you hit exactly what I would say. I was surprised by how well the comedy bits of this aged, especially because usually when y'all tell me that a movie from the 80s is funny and silly, I'm just like, what is happening? This is the dumbest thing I've ever seen in my entire life, and like questioning why anybody would do this, you know, kinds of things. And you know, this movie doesn't really hit that muscle for me. I don't know why, but I didn't sit back the whole time and think, why are they so dumb? There's some things I asked, you know, there's some questions for sure. But the little funny bits, I mean, there's some one-liners in this movie. I think I think this movie probably has the most successful one-liners for me of any 80s hot mess movie I've ever seen. And and they still hit like 40 years later. I'm not 40. Almost.

SPEAKER_00 18:09

I think the other thing that aged really well, aside from the comedy, was I don't know what you would call it, the props, the puppets, the zombies, like anything involved that was practical in this movie was so interesting to me. There's certain things that I literally right now wonder how on earth did they do it?

SPEAKER_03 18:24

Like the little spine that does this.

SPEAKER_00 18:26

Right. Like, how do you how do you do that with practical effects and it looks so good and so real? But you know it's fake, it doesn't matter because it just looks really good, but aged truly well, and there's some that looks deliberately ridiculous, and I still enjoyed it because I am also a fan of Evil Dead stuff, but Army of Darkness was one of my favorite movies growing up, and there's literally skeletons that are just like dancing around on screen and fighting with swords, and that's ridiculous. And I feel like this hit that energy at certain points.

SPEAKER_02 18:54

You know what? It does age really well, and I think one of the things about this movie is particularly like how it looks at gore, and obviously, you have so many zombie movies that are either really bloody or just like the deterioration of the zombies is intense. I think this is one that could be could be a little delicate for someone if you're particularly squeamish, but I don't think this is something that anyone should shy away from as looking for like a starter pack zombie movie. You know what I mean? Like Night of the Living Dead is super mild. I think if you want something more serious, you can go that way. But I think I would absolutely love to introduce someone to this before putting them on like a solid uh 10 out of 10, almost perfect zombie movie for like train du Busan for me. And I think it's because this isn't scary. This is a good time. Uh, so I think there's like nothing to worry about there.

SPEAKER_04 19:49

Yeah, it's a kids' movie for sure. I would show this to my kids. It'd be like Nightmare Before Christmas and then Return of the Living Dead. Like I think they go hand in hand. Maybe Halloween Town somewhere in there too.

SPEAKER_00 20:01

I think I might wait a couple years, maybe to like early teen years to show them this. Um, but I agree, it's not it's not really a scary movie. Not that really any movie scares me, but I I think this if you were like, even if you're squeamish, I feel like you'll probably be completely fine with the lights turned off and no one's at home. You're not gonna watch this and be like, oh my gosh, there might be a zombie in the closet. No, you're gonna watch this and go, that was ridiculous. How much fun.

SPEAKER_03 20:25

Yeah, I think and that's what it's trying to be.

SPEAKER_00 20:27

But the thing it loses out on, you know, because it it's not scary, but it's like deliberately not original. So it it loses originality points, but it's a hundred percent on purpose, which adds to the originality points because it's like, yo, we're gonna reference so much and so many things, especially the big one, right? Night of the living dead, but we're doing it on purpose, and I love the whole meta thing, and they execute it well.

SPEAKER_02 20:50

I gotta disagree with you, Mac, because I feel like this is a super original take on zombies for the time. Because like this is the movie that makes everybody else shamble and say, brains. This left an indelible mark on society and the subgenre as a whole, and it's the time where you get variations of zombies. Like this this had a this had its moment.

SPEAKER_04 21:12

Also, this could totally happen. Are we not in agreement in that? Like, this is something that like really could happen, so we need to get ready. Um, so I'm I'm really confused why you guys aren't ready. But the reality is, is I think um I think it's original just because, like Chris said, there's uh so many things that you would be like, wait, why is that happening? And you've never seen it in another movie. Um, and I think that that's it's original. I wouldn't say it's like you can totally expect everything that happens in this movie. There's no like surprises. Um, there's a lot of foreshadowing the entire time. So it's really easy to know what's gonna happen. So if you're into like the ooh, I gotcha, you won't, you won't be got. In this movie.

SPEAKER_03 22:01

Yeah, I'll I'll lean towards what you guys have said for originality. I think it gets the points, especially like the brain stuff, you know, you can't take away from that. That's literally the basis of zombies at this point. And also, Vero, I am somewhat prepared. Me and one of our patrons, we've already started delegating. I'm gonna be a welder. So we do have some plans for end of the world vibes. I don't know. Do we believe that based on true story vibes, you know? I don't think we should.

SPEAKER_00 22:28

You prepared for a zombie apocalypse? What's the point? You've already said you're going out first.

SPEAKER_03 22:32

I'm not saying I prepared for it. I'm just saying that there have been jobs delegated if I do happen to be alive. You know, I I have skills.

SPEAKER_02 22:41

Okay. I I really thought you were setting this up for you to have like the least impactful jobs so that when you just give yourself up, we're not all suffering.

SPEAKER_03 22:49

As long as you guys keep the outside taken care of, I'll be on the inside welding your whatever things you need, weapons. I got you.

SPEAKER_00 22:57

I have heard that Hot Topic has a zombie apocalypse emergency preparedness plan. I I had someone, a friend of mine that used to work at one, and he said that yeah, they have like in the store what you lock down, where you go, I think you go up into like the rafters or something, but they have apparently at one point they have like a plan for each store.

SPEAKER_02 23:13

Bro, the whole government has a plan. It's on official websites.

SPEAKER_03 23:17

If you owned a company and had like to issue like emergency evacuations evacuation plans and stuff, wouldn't you also do a zombie plan just for fun? Because everything else is boring about that process.

SPEAKER_02 23:28

Okay. So realistically speaking, Hackerslash is now an LLC. I should absolutely make a zombie preparedness plan as part of the package. 100.

SPEAKER_04 23:37

Absolutely. I think the the reality is I 100% we'll get into like in the spoiler zone why this is gonna happen to all of us. But the reality is I've always had a ready-to-go bag. Uh when I married my husband, I realized that I all the things that I planned for, I was not gonna succeed. But he can like catch fish with his hands. So we're good. He just has to like come with. Um, but I think the reality too is I am definitely a psychopath because all of y'all are talking about like what you would do to stay alive. And I have like a zombie plan when I become a zombie. Like, what is the first thing that I would do as a zombie? Um, so yeah, we're very different because I'm ready to roll. I'm like, let's let's go.

SPEAKER_02 24:24

I want to know what's on your zombie plan though. Like, what is your first what is your first target?

SPEAKER_04 24:30

I would go to Costco. I would go to Costco.

SPEAKER_03 24:32

That's the first thing that I'm gonna do. But they need a membership card.

SPEAKER_04 24:36

I have one. I'm a gold member. Okay, it's not gonna match your picture when you become a zombie. Accurate, accurate. But I would do Costco for sure. That's the first place I'm going. They got everything you need. Also, I'm gonna be a very smart zombie because I know what to do.

SPEAKER_00 24:52

You're gonna get bulk macaroni and cheese so you can make it for all the humans you're gonna eat.

SPEAKER_02 24:57

Yes, side dish. Side dish. Well, I think those contingency plans are a good thing to have. I I hadn't considered obviously having one uh in case of zombie, but I do think that the plans that are placed in this movie and kind of the lack of planning by some other characters or the failure to adhere to a very simple direction actually makes for a really satisfying ending to this movie. It's I think one of my favorite parts of it. It's conclusive in the sense that it leaves no mystery to what's happened once the credits roll. But I think it is, in fact, the best way it could have possibly ended. Boom.

SPEAKER_00 25:33

Okay, so I had a major logistical question about the ending, and that was just me not suspending display for a moment, but I found it really funny in like a burn after reading kind of way. It like when you get to the very end of the movie, it just like made me chuckle more because of the way that they ended it. Love that.

SPEAKER_03 25:48

I think it's the perfect direction for this movie. Honestly. I mean, when you go through this journey, you need what you get, and then the very, very, very last bit, you need that too. Because it's it's just perfect.

SPEAKER_02 26:00

Well, let's see if the perfection of that ending can translate to some positive scores. But before we actually rate this movie, Vero, how would you describe the gore score? Uh for those who maybe sweamish.

SPEAKER_04 26:14

I know. I was trying to think of this. I actually like pondered for a really long time because I was like, okay, what if I actually were a chicken shit? Like, how would I rate this? I would say a medium gore, almost like no gore. I would hug Tarman before I hugged any of you. I'll just say that.

SPEAKER_03 26:31

And Ryan, what about the animal report? Yeah, this is one of those ones that like Pete is not stoked on, but I'm gonna I'm gonna be honest, I have no idea what I'm supposed to tell you about the animal report here. You just gotta roll with it.

SPEAKER_02 26:43

All right, well, let's go ahead and roll right into these ratings then. The return of the living dead from 1985. Was it a hack or was it a slash? And we'll start with Vero herself. Slash, brains, more brains.

SPEAKER_03 26:57

Yeah, Vero, I think that was a pretty predictable slash. You you seem to be, you know, at least a little bit of a fan of this movie. I went into this and I turned it on, and and the first five minutes I was like, oh, they got me again with another one, another movie of just nonsense. And like, could this be a more alternative group of people? Not at all. But then we go on a journey and we take some wild rides together, and honestly, it is a good time. And for me, I cannot believe I'm telling y'all, but it's a slash, and I'm not saying it's the best movie ever. I think we all know it's not the best movie ever, but it's a good time, and like it's a good time in the way that I think y'all tell me stuff is supposed to be a good time all the time. It's a good time in the way that I could not enjoy Evil Dead. So, I mean, I don't know, that's kind of significant. It's a good slash.

SPEAKER_00 27:52

I am surprised from what I anticipated you would you would actually give this, Ryan. Uh, but after we've gone through this whole conversation, I'm not surprised. So this whole this whole last 35 minutes has surprised me, I'll say that. So that's that's a positive thing for you. Um but this film is a is truly a joke, but it's not a waste of time. If you go into this realizing that the joke is on purpose, you'll have so much of a better time. It's not the type of camp that like we typically appreciate here where it's like really tongue-in-cheek and almost slapstick, really kind of like airplane. Um, but it's still this great silly meta zombie flick, and I I cannot hate it in any way. It was ridiculous, it was weird, and I had a great time watching it. It's a slash.

SPEAKER_02 28:35

Well, we are off to the races here, and let me just say that Night of the Living Dead is an all-time great to me, right? It was a very serious movie, and all of my connection to zombie lore stems from that original film and Romero's Dead series. So zombie comedies came to me much later in life, and I am actually highly upset that it took so long for me to see this movie, and I'm so mad at myself that I saw Shawn of the Dead before I saw Return of the Living Dead, because this movie is absolutely a slash. It is a great time. I think this is a movie that you could probably watch, and Vera, maybe you can confirm. I feel like you could watch this movie 70 times and still hear a new line of dialogue every time, just from the way that the characters were riffing off of each other. There are so many things scattered around the background of this movie, signs hanging up in the back, and a new detail to uncover, but it does all that while still managing to be a very simple, straightforward, comedic romp through a cemetery. And with that, the return of the living dead from 1985. Vero's pick on her debut episode heads under Universal Slash. Congratulations, Vero. Honestly. Thank you. Now you can find this movie streaming online. So go check it out. Then join us in the second half so we can break down all these spoilers together. We'll see you in a bit.

SPEAKER_03 30:09

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SPEAKER_02 31:34

Welcome back, folks. You are now entering the spoiler zone for the return of the living dead, which has earned a universal slash. Now we have a lot to unpack here, but before we get into the specifics of our ratings, Vero, take us through the kills.

SPEAKER_04 31:46

Alright, so this is obviously a zombie movie. So pretty much everybody's dead. Uh, but there's three things that really kind of split up the deaths in this movie. So it's either by gas or eaten by a zombie or nut, which are all kind of fun, right? Obviously, I think the coolest deaths are like the actual uh crust punks, which we've already established. That's her name. Suicide gets eaten by my boy Tarman, which is the best. Trash actually foreshadows her death and says that she wants to be eaten alive by all these men, which is like okay. So she gets like mutilated by all these male zombies. Then we go into the paramedics, which just get attacked and eaten by zombies so quickly that the reality is that there wasn't enough paramedics. Scuzz gets be bitten in the head by a female skeleton. Um, there's a homeless man that also gets uh bitten in the head, but it's by trash. So I I mean, obviously, you guys like trash in the beginning when she's naked and alive, but naked trash zombie is pretty fun. Walk around naked if you look like that. But she gets rowdy and she kills homeless people, which is kind of sad. But then there's some police uh which again get eaten by zombies. Everybody like thinks that they can, you know, take care of the zombies, but in reality, they all just get mutilated. Freddy, which is such a cutie with his rat tail, um, turns into a zombie, obviously, with Frank in the trioxin uh gas that explodes, and then they get cremated. So Frank gets cremated, you know. The reality is that they're dying the entire time, which I think every single scene you just see them get like more dead and more ooey and like so sweaty. They're so man, I I had so many issues with Frank's sweat pits. I don't know if everybody did.

SPEAKER_02 33:46

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 33:47

Right? It was it was too much.

SPEAKER_02 33:50

I felt bad for him. It was so disgusting, and then I also didn't realize until I was like looking back through the deaths that the point where the cadaver runs out and runs at Bert, he totally bypasses Frank and Freddie because they're already dead. Ooh. I I didn't even like that didn't even occur to me like on the first pass.

SPEAKER_04 34:09

Yeah. Okay, the cadaver's body. I like real it's like a b uh dad bod, but it's like yellowy. I don't know. When they cut his head off and he stands up and you see his like all belly, that was just a side note. But also he totally bit Bert and Bert like was hanging out like no big deal. So whatever. Police officers, all of them get uh eaten by zombies. Uh they just kind of have like a block party and kill everybody. It's pretty sick. And then here comes the nuke. So I feel like it was a little lazy to get killed by a nuke, but if you haven't seen the second one, um, Real Talk, it kind of sets it up really, really well. So uh it all makes sense. Fun fact approximately 3,994 citizens were killed by this nuke.

SPEAKER_00 34:59

See, that's the logistical issue I had with the ending was like they fired this apparent nuke or atomic bomb of some sort using artillery. It was it was a weird choice, but it was like confined to a couple city blocks as well. Also strange.

SPEAKER_03 35:14

How did y'all know it was nuclear? Because I just thought it was like a regular weapon.

SPEAKER_00 35:18

Yeah, I mean, it was an artillery shell of some sort that they fired from like a bazillion miles away, apparently.

SPEAKER_02 35:23

Yeah, it can't just be a missile. So I think also the idea of nuking something is to do something with excessive overkill. So even if it's not literally a nuclear warhead, it is at least overkill for the situation. Which maybe it wouldn't have been overkill had they done something about this earlier, like called the fucking number 14 years ago.

SPEAKER_04 35:46

I know. That was my favorite. Everybody's like, don't call the army. I'm like, uh, okay, you're all gonna die. What were some of your favorite kills? Okay, so I think trash for sure. I I was cringy, but at the same time, I'm like, fuck yeah, she got what she wanted, you know. Not in a mean way, like she actually wanted that. I, you know, I feel really bad for Freddy. So I feel like him uh wanting to eat Tina, like the love of his life. Like it's such a romantic kind of kill. So I think that's probably my favorite. Yeah, I said romantic. I felt like there is love there.

SPEAKER_03 36:22

For me, my favorite kill was suicide because I felt like his head got eaten like an apple. Like it was just like it felt like crunchy. I felt like a nice, you know, that was a crisp apple, just right into the right into the dome. It was a good one for me. And I was ready for him to go.

SPEAKER_02 36:39

Dude, he he had a nice little chomp for sure, but I think my favorite death has nothing to do with chomps, and it's undoubtedly Frank. He foreshadowed his own death when he scoffed at Ernie's favor, right? And he's like, he could work it himself. Uh, but his death was also, I thought, like a really sobering moment in the movie because in the midst of all this comedy, he hangs his wedding ring, he prays for forgiveness, and then he climbs in and burns to death. His screams are agonizing, and it's like, bro, that's a serious moment. And it gave us a break from the chuckles, and then we dove right back into the chuckles immediately after.

SPEAKER_00 37:13

I think my favorite is is trash. I think you've you've mentioned why though, but I think the the on death is what makes it so much fun. The death itself kind of sucks. Also, are they biting her? Because then when she's like back, she's completely normal and and gets away kind of scot-free aside from being dead now.

SPEAKER_03 37:29

Have you never bit somebody with love? Also, are you logicking return of the living dead?

SPEAKER_00 37:35

I it was just a logistical question. Okay, I just thought there would be bite marks.

SPEAKER_04 37:39

Listen, I it my favorite thing about this movie is to problem solve every single thing. Like, let's talk this through. Why did we do this this way? Um, but I I guess they just like bit her for fun and then just like a nice little taste, but she's fine. She's a badass. Tasty.

SPEAKER_00 37:56

They gave her some nibbles and she came out better.

SPEAKER_04 37:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:01

But I I think like the the the like the whole color change after we get into zombie mode, like that's really fun. It felt like her hair was different as well, and that was kind of fun. But she seemed to be having fun, which was the best part, because a lot of the zombies are just like, I need brains, everything hurts, but when I get brains, things feel better. And she's like, yo, I'm here to like tear the street up, and I love that.

SPEAKER_03 38:21

Okay, but how about the sobering moment of like death hurts so much? I eat brains to stop feeling the pain. Like, stop, that's so sad.

SPEAKER_04 38:31

I feel like I do that already. I eat food to not be sad. So it's normal to do it as a as a zombie, I think. For them, it's like chips, you know, you can't just eat one, you gotta eat the whole bag.

SPEAKER_02 38:45

Oh, so we're all just you know, walking bags of Pringles?

SPEAKER_04 38:48

Ugh, not Pringles, like Doritos. Spicy, the sweet and spicy Doritos.

SPEAKER_03 38:54

That means we smell like feet. Alright, so there's no getting around it here. Trash is obviously gonna be my favorite visual element of this whole movie.

SPEAKER_00 39:03

Because boobs?

SPEAKER_03 39:05

I mean, it's a whole package, really. I mean, it just it takes a lot to not overdo it takes a lot to not overdo nudity when it's someone on screen only nude. And somehow you're just like, oh well, that's just trash. That's what she does, which is how everybody else treated it too. So there's no complaints for me. That's it has to be my favorite visual element. If I didn't do it, I'd be lying.

SPEAKER_04 39:28

If you if you don't get hyped like everybody did when trash started dancing, then you don't have real friends. I feel like that's the the reality. But my um favorite visual element, I I mean there is a cemetery and a mortuary, so like that's already perfect. Um, I love the the just the sweet zombie feel of just the graves and everybody just bursting out and kind of um it just makes you feel like okay, this is badass. This is when it's actually getting started. So that's probably the dark, spooky thing that made me really, really love this.

SPEAKER_00 40:04

Oh, for me it was Tarman, a hundred percent. I love the movement of Tarman. It felt puppet-like, which I thought was really cool. And you you have a sculpture of Tarman is that a mask. I don't know what it is, but I love it. A mask. That's an amazing looking mask. So I just I don't know, the the face was so interesting because like it's kind of cartoonish in a way, with like it it looks out of place with the rest of the body, but then when he starts moving and obviously saying that he wants to eat their brains, like the whole package, that was the whole package, Ryan, was was Tarmin. The movement, the gooeiness, and then the face just poking right through everything. Brilliant. Loved seeing that on screen. Honestly, like the best zombie of the entire film.

SPEAKER_02 40:45

Oh, he absolutely is the best zombie of the entire film. He I think it was like a like a really close tied for first place in terms of like my favorite visual. The best shot, I think, in this whole movie is when shit's starting to go down, the gas is in the air, and we get that shot of the body bag moving around in the plastic bag in the freezer. Oh my gosh, that was so good. And that was a moment where even if this movie didn't take a completely comedic turn, that could have been the start of a really great, like serious, scary movie. Because that was like a chilling image, no pun intended with it being in a freezer.

SPEAKER_04 41:25

I think we talked about it before, but just the kind of elements behind the scenes, right? Like one of my favorite uh scenes, and I know we talked about this before. If you're looking at the background, there's so many details that you can kind of see. Um, and my favorite is when Freddie and Frank go into the office to call Bert and you see an eye chart in the background, and it says Bert is a slave driver and a cheap son of a bitch. And it's so classy, obviously, because I think everybody wants to say that to your boss. Um, but it's like so subtle, so you don't really know. And as a sad goth, you know, sad girl, I think that everything that you want is, you know, in this movie. There's the music. Um, you know, you feel paranoid because you're like, wait, what is actually happening? Nobody knew the entire time. Uh, so I think that it definitely brought the vibes.

SPEAKER_03 42:20

Also, one of the things that the patrons pointed out is Unita is the name of the company. You need a medical supply. Which is hilarious.

SPEAKER_02 42:29

You need it, we got it.

SPEAKER_04 42:31

That's so good.

SPEAKER_02 42:31

I didn't even know that. I also love the placement of that though, because you see that immediately after you get the title card of this is all real. Real places, real organizations, real names. This totally happened. And this is what you see immediately after, and that's absolutely hilarious. Very, you talked about what you can see in the background of these shots, and when you have them in the office about to call Bert, that's like in the midst of my absolute favorite scene in this movie. And it's the chaos of the moment, and it's them realizing that everything's coming back to life. This is the point where you know they are really thrown off by hearing a dog, they see the split dog. It's actually made me a little bit sad. Not because I mean, obviously, it's a totally fake dog. Um, it's it's in no way, you know, something that would emotionally strike you, but the sound effect of a dog being hit is not fun for me. Uh, but still, this managed to make me laugh at it. We have that, we had the butterfly wings coming to life. Those were so good. Oh, they're so good. We have so much is happening in this moment, and then you just kind of realize, oh shit, we're really getting started here. Between that and the ending, uh, really just great bookends for this movie.

SPEAKER_03 43:46

My favorite scene is probably one of the top like chaos scenes, but it happens pretty quickly. It's when that string of cops shows up, they pull up to a zombie cop who's like stopping them, right? And then Everybody just rushes the cars and pulls them out. And it's just like such a dynamic scene. I loved it. I love how the zombies had like some element of consciousness still here, which is a very different approach. I mean, we have like a couple things that happen differently. They have some consciousness, they don't seem to be able to die, like you know, through our normal methods, like hit them in the head and stuff like that. And I don't know, that scene was just so funny. And there was a moment where you're like, oh, maybe things will get a little better. And it very quickly it was clear that they weren't getting better.

SPEAKER_04 44:31

I think the cadaver, too, if you really pay attention in the scene, there is absolute madness. Like the shot is of like the back of their like legs in the middle of like the racks. You're like, wait, why don't you like go closer? Like, what are we doing here? So I don't even think they knew how they were recording it. But the fact that they're like slowly chopping his head off or sawing his head off. Um I mean, it's just it takes like 15 minutes way too long, but it was so good. Also, I don't want my skin to look like that. I'd be super bummed if it did.

SPEAKER_03 45:08

It's just because it was a cadaver. So like they do all these like really creepy things to keep cadavers preserved. And when they were cutting him open, I was like concerned that they were gonna I don't know, I was concerned there was gonna be blood. Like maybe they weren't gonna keep it true to a cadaver. And I was just thankful that they did because the whole point is that everything has been drained. But yeah, the cadavers have really gross, yellow, weird, bad colors, bad smells. You're not supposed to keep a body after it dies. That's basically the gist.

SPEAKER_00 45:38

Okay, speaking of weird bodies and death and stuff, the scene with the speaking zombie torso, one of my favorites of this whole movie. I I love the effects of the actual little like zombie puppet thing moving, wiggling its little spine as if you know it was trying to get somewhere. That was amazing. Explaining to them why it's hungry for brains, love that. But just like them deciding, oh, we can talk to this thing and having a conversation and like trying to go about it logically. That was just a brilliant point in this movie.

SPEAKER_03 46:11

That spine was so gross and so interesting at the same time, but like, why was it moving like that? And how? Ugh. Oh, I hated it.

SPEAKER_02 46:19

I love that Mac's out here trying to have a conversation with these zombies. We talked a while back when we did A Quiet Place about how Ryan would get taken out immediately because her tactic would be to tell the jade aliens a joke and she'd get killed trying to make someone laugh. And I feel like now Mac would absolutely just walk up to a zombie, try to have a reasonable conversation, say, yo, dude, are you actually sick or what's up?

SPEAKER_04 46:43

I think we established though that I we're going to, you know, still have a life after we die with as a zombie. Um, and okay, so I I I think I said it in the like spoiler-free zone, but I'll say it now. So the 245 uh trioxin gas um is actually based in real life. Uh they used it during the Vietnam War. It was part of like a um the agent orange, whatever. So they actually did use it, which means that they could totally use it. 1960 wasn't that long ago. Um, so we should all just be ready for this to actually happen. I am. I don't know if you are, but I am.

SPEAKER_02 47:24

Now I'm terrified. I also love that your plan includes what to do when you are a zombie because it's an inevitability.

SPEAKER_03 47:31

You know, speaking of surviving, I'm gonna be honest, everybody that died in this movie, I was like totally chill with it. I feel like these were cool people, they weren't the worst characters, but also I was just ready to see how they were all gonna die. Like that was the whole point of this, right?

SPEAKER_04 47:45

Yeah, talking about characters, I have a low-key crush on uh suicide. I feel like I would actually date him. Rat tail and everything, I take it. I was legit a bad kid, crust punk, you know, gross looking guy. Like I have my septum pierced, you know what I mean? So I think the reality is that I would hang out with all of these people. These are people that I would actually be friends with. So it made me feel like I was like, okay, I could be in that car. I could be doing everything that I am doing with it, every single one of them. So biffles. They were my biffles, every single one of them.

SPEAKER_00 48:20

I am kind of sad that we didn't get a scene with every single one of them as zombies. I feel like that would have been the ultimate turn of the tide is to see these cool kids that are like so alternative, like you mentioned earlier, Ryan, and to see them now as like cool bluish tinted zombies all together on the hunt for some brains.

SPEAKER_03 48:41

Yeah, like they all get back in the car, like literally 15 people in one car.

SPEAKER_00 48:45

That would have been amazing.

SPEAKER_03 48:46

Yeah, it would have been good.

SPEAKER_02 48:47

So that actually reminds me of a movie called Ah Zombies. It's a movie that kind of takes place in black and white and in color, and it's almost like a Pleasantville kind of energy to it, except it's like a really bad, independent, like B movie. And these kids accidentally ingest some radioactive shit that like makes them zombies, and you see the movie from their perspective, but that every once in a while it cuts to in color, and then you see and you find out like they're zombies the whole time. The whole time they're like, Why is everybody being mean to us? And you see them as completely normal when you're seeing it from their perspective, and it's kind of hilarious. I feel like that kind of moment in this movie with that that group of kids would have been hilarious. I found that Ernie honestly was one of my favorite characters. I absolutely loved how reasonable and skeptical he was at the very beginning when like you have this curiosity of why someone's coming in asking for this kind of favor. Obviously, it's not rabid weasels in the bag. And um, he has this like comedy that's biting right beneath the surface of all his dialogue with a really dry delivery that I just absolutely loved.

SPEAKER_00 49:53

I feel like Ernie is this the type of guy that like we all know at some point in our earlier lives thinking like, ah, this guy's like such an uncle and makes such uncle jokes. And then as we get older, we realize we're Ernie.

SPEAKER_03 50:06

Speak for yourself.

SPEAKER_04 50:07

I don't think Ernie uh pays taxes. I just feel like he doesn't. I don't know. He's super sketchy looking. I I I I don't trust Ernie. I don't know. I feel like he would tell me bad jokes or something.

SPEAKER_02 50:20

So you might not trust him because there's like this subtext of him being a former Nazi.

SPEAKER_00 50:26

Oh what?

SPEAKER_02 50:27

It's not blatant in the movie, except for the type of gun he has. I think he's listening to some kind of German music in his headphones. I was looking at some uh some research on the movie and digging into the behind the scenes, and there's a book that you can buy that's like the complete history of this movie, and they talk about that kind of being part of his backstory and his character, which frames it differently. I think there's nothing that I dislike about this movie generally. And in considering a worst part, I think that subtext would be it because I feel like it it robs me of an otherwise like hilarious character that I I had no guilt in enjoying. I'll just keep pretending you never told me that.

SPEAKER_00 51:06

Yeah, I think you should transfer your your initial like admiration for him to Frank, though, because Frank is the buffoon that we all truly are inside of us deeply. Like we're the we all would set off this canister, I think, because curiosity is just like part of who we are, and maybe we wouldn't slap it as hard as he did, but like we would probably stumble into it accidentally, drop a water bottle on it. I feel like that's something Ryan might do.

SPEAKER_02 51:30

Speak for yourself.

SPEAKER_00 51:32

Maybe that's just me. I don't know. I just I feel like Frank is kind of lovable in a way, but also kind of hateable, and so are we all.

SPEAKER_02 51:38

Sir, no. I follow instructions to the letter. I'm not touching that shit. If I that showed up in my workplace 14 years ago, I would have called the number immediately. If I get hired to that place and it's been 14 years, I'm calling the number immediately, saying, hey, guess what I found? Randomly. Ah, something appeared. Uh absolutely I'm not fucking opening that canister.

SPEAKER_00 51:57

Well, I think we are more like Freddie though. Like our first like thought would be call the number on the thing, get this taken care of. I probably would have just like snuck away at that point had he told me this whole backstory and showed me that. I would have been like, okay, I'm a pound, I'm gonna go bounce right now. I gotta pee real quick and then brought it up right in the phone.

SPEAKER_04 52:13

I know I feel it are we bad people that I wouldn't necessarily like open it, but then I'd be like, fuck it, I'm not telling anybody else. Y'all can die. I'm out of here. Like, and I would just leave. But like I, you know, I'd be like, some other dodo bird is gonna like touch this, but I'm not. Um, and then I'd probably move somewhere.

SPEAKER_02 52:33

Yeah, but I think one of the one of the other things about this movie is like even if you move, it's still gonna come because at the end you have the rain washing away stuff, right? So like it's just like a vicious cycle. It was a good cycle.

SPEAKER_03 52:46

I enjoyed that cycle, and the cycle coming back at the end was so good because what else would happen, you know? Obviously, everything but just gonna be more zombies. That's the whole point. It worked out perfectly for me.

SPEAKER_04 52:57

I know, and I feel like no character got developed because they all died. You know, everybody's like, hey, they're here, they're dying, and then they're dead. Like that's the actual okay, maybe they did. Chris, I already see it in your eyes. You're gonna be like, well, but real talk, they all fucking died. Every single one of them. She was about to hit you with a mean well. I know, dude.

SPEAKER_02 53:18

Yo, I I see it. I see it in your eyes. I I agree with you. Like, they all the everything was exterminated, everyone, everyone uh expired by the end of this movie. But I think one of the hilarious things of comedy in this movie is the fact that suicide is just out here like talking some mad deep shit the entire time. You're like, you have so much to say, sir. It's one of those where like every time he opened his mouth, it felt like a drawing experience from the rest of the movie. So even though I would say the characters weren't necessarily developed, I think they were very distinct.

SPEAKER_03 53:51

I actually am impressed with how hard it is for me to come up with the worst part. I think my worst part is like the first few minutes where I thought I was gonna take this movie seriously, and I was pissed. Like when I saw the car with like writing all over it, I was like, what when they were just saying the most like alternative anything they could say, I was just like, oh, please help me. And then this like one main chick is just dressed like a sweet little regular high school person, or I don't know. It was I there was just a moment where I was like, I could not hate this more. And then we took a turn and I was like, oh, okay, we're just going on, you know, this is a based on true events. I'm down for the lies, got it.

SPEAKER_04 54:30

If I if I'm being real, real, if I did not know that there was a second part, it would leave me like too sad. So I'd be really bummed and I'd be like, ugh, the ending is kind of lazy. But if I didn't know that there was a second part, but since I do, it's bad, but it's not like the worst. I feel like I'll get over it. Okay, I'll give you that.

SPEAKER_00 54:52

It's honestly it's hard for me to pick something. I'm gonna nitpick just because I can. I'll just say the worst part of the movie is dancing naked in a graveyard because that's just disrespectful.

SPEAKER_02 55:00

I love how uh your worst part of the movie is one of the most iconic moments in the movie. That's fantastic. But it's on principle, it's not about the moment in the movie. It's uh the idea of someone stripping down into the nude, into the birthday suit, and disrespecting graves. Look at you.

SPEAKER_00 55:15

Well, so I do me I I've mentioned before that I think most sex scenes, uh every sex scene in any movie is completely unnecessary and doesn't add anything to a movie. And I feel like in this case, it's kind of similar to the the scene in Under Siege with uh Stephen Segal, where there is a stripper that pops out of a cake and dances not realizing that nobody's in the ship because it's been taken over at that point. Uh anyway, it's so ridiculous because it's completely unnecessary and didn't need to happen. And I feel like in this movie, it's kind of the same thing. We didn't need her to dance naked in a graveyard. Like we can establish her character in other ways. We can have her get nude if you really want to in other ways. It just it's just kind of extra for the sake of being extra.

SPEAKER_03 55:56

Okay, but what's better than a character who literally has hot tits and her shtick is getting naked and dancing in public? Like that's her thing? Are you joking me? How could you know a character any better than that?

SPEAKER_04 56:07

Also, she has some killer moves. Like, if you see it, like she's legit. She's got the role. She's like takes her, like she has the legging. I don't know what clothing has to do with her moves, but it matters. She had everything, everything that you needed. She had rhythm, she was ready to go. So also, she s she tore her shirt up so classy, I think. Um, it was a very classy move.

SPEAKER_03 56:32

She was hitting all the beats that needed to be hit, like as a general thing. Not the music beats, but like the the the things you need to do if you're gonna be a chick that gets naked in public and dances and doesn't care about anybody and strips their clothes off and whatever. She hit all the things she needed to.

SPEAKER_02 56:47

Oh, yes, the beat of seduction. Absolutely. Classic. That's right.

SPEAKER_00 56:52

Missed opportunity to start dancing while naked and get bitten by a zombie in a graveyard, though. That would have been kind of a fun little scene to throw in there, just saying.

SPEAKER_04 57:00

Yeah, it's also a bummer though. She was naked with acid rain. Like she she probably suffered the most um when she put like on a vest. What like she still she had acid rain on her body.

SPEAKER_03 57:12

Can I just say how afraid of acid rain I was when I was growing up? Like I really like I thought we were really gonna have like a big impact. Like I wasn't gonna be able to go outside in the rain. And uh that's not true at all. It's just it's fine.

SPEAKER_00 57:25

Give it time.

SPEAKER_03 57:25

It has been time.

SPEAKER_00 57:27

No, give it a few more decades. We're almost there.

SPEAKER_03 57:29

I'm just saying I've known about it for a long time, and I was very concerned when I was like eight.

SPEAKER_04 57:33

Right. It's a full moon, and you just put it out in the universe. So you're literally we're gonna get acid rain in like two days. I'm not scared.

SPEAKER_02 57:42

I'm gonna be real, I've always wondered what it is because people would talk about it, and I think I just didn't ask enough questions in the moment with context, so I I don't fully understand. I'm not up to speed. It's kind of like when I missed the boat on fractions and reading analog time at elementary school. Just kind of get by, thinking that uh creating the illusion that I know what you're talking about. Science and ecosystems. Those sound like professional words.

SPEAKER_00 58:05

So you you mentioned earlier, you mentioned earlier, Veto, that the the the presence of a sequel like affects your enjoyment of this movie. And I I don't know if I could watch this one on its own again anytime soon, but it did make me want to watch the sequel. So I'll I'll agree there.

SPEAKER_04 58:21

Yeah, it's it picks up right where you need it. Like you it has the main I'm obviously already kind of hoping people to watch it, but um, without giving any spoilers, like the characters are still like little assholes. So it's it's kind of cool to see it kind of still go. Ridiculous. Um I will say that it gets I feel like they had a little bit more money on the second one. So the like actual like makeup and effects and all of that is a little bit better, like tad bit. Um, but it definitely is is awesome for sure.

SPEAKER_03 59:01

I could see wanting to watch the sequel, but I I mean, I don't know. I will watch this again at some point, but I'm not I I don't know when. I don't know when the situation would be like, dude, let's watch Return of the Living Dead, but I'm down.

SPEAKER_02 59:14

Oh yeah, this is something that I am so bummed that I missed out on this far into my life. I'm fucking 32 years old and I've been missing out this movie. This movie is four years older than me, and I had every opportunity to watch it growing up this entire time, so I will be watching this again. I cannot wait to do a double feature with this and the sequel. But uh something I'm even more excited about is hearing how things shake out with Max. Fact or fiction.

SPEAKER_00 59:39

Number one, Tom Matthews, who plays Freddy, decided to get his ear pierced for the role, since the character had a pierced ear. He found out later he could have just used a clip-on.

SPEAKER_04 59:48

Fact. Fiction. He had a rat tail.

SPEAKER_00 59:50

This one is a fact. I think that's dedication as an actor. I'll I'm gonna give him some credit for that. Number two, the bags of rabid weasels that they brought in, aka the dead moving body part thingies, those were just energizer bunnies.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:03

Well, I feel like they had a different pattern, but you know, I was thinking they could have made those look more like moving body parts. I will go fact again.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:10

Yeah, I think fact. They're we they did weird shit on this movie, so I'm gonna say fact.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:15

This one is a fiction because they use those little motorized monkey toys with symbols, and they just removed the symbols.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:21

Oh, that's kinda genius.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:22

Smart, right? Number three, the moving butterfly effect was created by applying a small electrical current through butterfly cadavers.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:30

Fiction, there's no way. Why would they do it that way?

SPEAKER_04 1:00:33

I I wanna say fiction as well. Um, because that's fucked up. Like, we just let them they already died. I don't know why I like butterfly- I you can't even catch a butterfly half of the time. Just let them lit live or die, I guess. Die.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:47

You know what, Vero? That might be exactly why it's actually true. Because it's messed up.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:53

This one is a fiction. They were printed. They literally just like printed some butterflies and cut them out and like stuck their wings out a little bit and then blew air on them off camera. That's an amazing effect, I think.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:03

Very interesting choice. I want behind the scenes on that one.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:07

And number four, Tina falling through the step. Accident, but not an accident. Dan O'Bannon had that bad set put in on a lunch break and then told the actress to do a test run, and Homegirl like literally hurt herself doing it.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:18

Oi, I will go fact here. Same z. Like you could tell that she actually got hurt.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:24

This one's a fact. You can notice that it like took her a second to get up from it. And that's been fact or fiction.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:29

Well, there you have it, folks. The Return of the Living Dead from 1985 has earned a universal slash. Now, we certainly had a lot to talk about here, but it doesn't end here by any means. We want to know what you think. Is this movie a classic for you as well? Did you enjoy having our new friend Vero hanging out with us? Let us know. You can join in on the conversation by hanging out with us for free over in our Discord. Click the link in our show notes to sign up.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:54

If you've enjoyed listening to this episode, consider becoming one of our patrons. Visit patreon.com slash hacker slash to enjoy more of the show with early access, extended episodes, bonus content, and live shows.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:05

We'll see you next time, folks. And remember, don't fool around. You're learning.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:09

Try not to think about dying too much.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:22

So this movie brings up an important question for everyone, which is are you the kind of people that would hang out in a cemetery?

SPEAKER_00 1:02:29

No, it's disrespectful. Easy answer.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:31

I knew you'd say that.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:33

Oh man, all the time. I would like go walk in a cemetery just for fun. Okay, here's the thing though. I I make up stories. Like I live in my own head. So I make up stories of people that like, I don't know. So I would literally walk around and be like, that person was probably such a good person, you know, whatever. Um, I clean up cemeteries. You have to. That's the disrespectful part if you don't go to clean it up and if they have dead flowers or whatever. But yeah, I would I would hang out all the time in cemeteries.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:04

Interesting.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:05

I know.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:06

I enjoy the idea of cemeteries. I would not mind like if we were to be kids, I'd I'd go to a cemetery, you know, it was kind of spooky, etc. Um, I did visit that mass grave site in um Baltimore area that I shared during the cutting room for our last episode. I have not been to a cemetery since I had to work like a like a military burial. So I don't know that I would frequent there now in in this stage of my life, but I'm not against it.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:35

Yeah, I I think I don't know. I f I have a weird thing about cemeteries. It's so funny, Mac, because we are normally like, you know, aliens aren't real. Well uh Ouija board is just a Ouija board. Oh sorry, sorry, sorry, ghosts aren't real. There you go. Uh, you know, Ouija board is just a cardboard, you know, placemat. You know what I mean? We're usually those people. But with cemeteries, it does feel weird for some reason, even though the truth is it's just like some rocks and some dirt and some boxes.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:06

Yeah, I mean, I I think the part that's weird to me is most of the cemeteries I ever visited growing up were military cemeteries overseas. So from like World War World War I and World War II, and it's weird to me to imagine going to one and like partying and stuff, and that's where the disrespectful part comes in for me. Uh, as an adult, the few times I've been to a cemetery have been for family members. So the idea of going to a cemetery to hang out is even more disrespectful in my mind. I love the idea of going to one and cleaning up, though. I think that's amazing. Um, I think it would be fun or interesting, not not like fun like to go party and drink beers, but like interesting to go to one from I don't know, hundreds of years ago. Like that I think would be really like I'm curious about like the style of the of the headstones and and all of the cool stonework going around. Like one from the Revolutionary War, I'm intrigued. I would go to one just to walk around and check it out.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:02

I think I'm good. I don't know, I don't know what it is about historical graves that I'm like, uh, I'm kind of bored by this. But if you go to Savannah, obviously, like they I don't know if they get paid royalties every time they say, This is a city built on its dead, you're standing on dead bodies, but that's like the whole gimmick there. So, I mean, the idea of that is kind of cool, I suppose. But I will say that when I lived in Big Sandy, Texas, a small town allegedly named after a a uh sex worker of the local house. Um, her name was Big Sandy, there was nothing to do in that town. So I remember hearing a bunch of teenagers from the local high school would hang out in the cemetery and drink and then like go cow tipping or some shit. And I'm like, oh, this feels I was like very Texas. I don't know, maybe our Texas listeners can chime in and let me know if that's just uh that has since faded since the nineties when I was there.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:56

My dad lives like around the corner from a cemetery. It's kind of old. But not I mean, I don't know. Aren't all cemeteries a little old, you know? They got dead people in them, so they gotta be somewhat old. I've run through it, like on a run, run straight through the middle, and I wouldn't do it again. It's a zero out of ten for me. I c again I could see the I could see the cleaning thing. I think that'd be cool, but I don't know. It's also just like I don't understand, I think, why people are like particularly drawn to them. It it doesn't hold like the weight for me that it holds for Mac, but I'm just like, you know, there's other places I could hang out.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:31

Okay, so when you're on your day off and you have alone time planned, right? And people disrespect that. Like know that you want to spend that time alone and are just like blowing up your phone with stupid crap, and you're like, come on, that's kind of annoying. Imagine, like, hey, I have some alone time planned for the rest of eternity, and people just like show up and throw beer cans around. That's you know, disrespect. Trying to rest here.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:53

Do you think they're there? Like, they're not hanging out watching Netflix down there. It's Netflix and die.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:59

Hey, we don't know.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:01

I do know.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:02

Mac, you don't believe in ghosts. Then why does it bother?

SPEAKER_04 1:07:05

See, I I do believe in ghosts though. I I'm like the whole brujeria thing, like the go. I like, you know, make sure that I'm like, hey, listen, I'm here, what's up? I hope you're well. But yeah, no, I I I totally believe in it. That's why I give them stories so that I feel that like I'm, you know, with them. I'm like hanging out with them. To be fair though, I haven't gotten to I I just don't hang out in cemeteries on my day off. I know I sound like a psychopath, but I'm not really a psychopath. It's just fun. I just like I rather be with dead people than uh regular people. If that makes any sense. I rather hang out with the dead than with people.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:43

The ones that were already dead.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:44

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:46

Right.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:47

This sounds like Veto belongs in the corpse bride or Coco.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:51

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:52

I wish I haven't seen that movie. Wait, you haven't?

SPEAKER_00 1:07:54

You haven't seen Coco?

SPEAKER_02 1:07:56

I have not seen Coco. I don't want to because I know it's sad. Oh yeah, you will cry. I will sob, yeah. I I'm not prepared for that.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:03

It's sad, but it's happy. It's heartwarming.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:05

I'm not prepared for this emotional devastation.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:10

What's up, chicken shit? I said that too happy. What's up, chicken shit? Chris really likes that I say chicken shit. Also, chicken shit is from Monster Squad. It's the best phrase ever.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:26

One of my favorite moments with Vero and knowing her in my life was sitting across from her as someone said thought that they were smarter than a computer. And she said, You're not that smart.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:37

And I still didn't get HR called on me, to be fair. They were like, they were like, you know, you're right. I was gonna say I agree. That's it. Mac for president.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:53

I don't know if this is uh, you know, what do we do believe?

SPEAKER_04 1:08:58

Boom. Right? That's the best way. That's how it ended. Oh, wait, that's a fucking spoiler. Yeah, god damn it. And it's literally the end of the movie. All right. Well, it's really motherfuckers. This came out in 1985. So if you didn't see it, whatever. No, no, no. That's not the rules. Flash. Brains, more brains.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:25

Do you want to say anything else, Vera? No, that's it. Just just brains. Okay. I just want to make sure I wasn't gonna cut you off.

SPEAKER_02 1:09:34

Zemed No, Zomedic. I almost said Zomedic instead of fucking comedic. Jesus. Uh zombies.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:41

It's a zombie, it's a zombie comedy, Zamedic. It's a word. What do I win? Your ability to stay. Honor. Yes. Mommy, they like me.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:53

You win bragging rights for not being like Ryan and nominating a film that you ultimately hack.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:58

That is still an honor exclusive to Ryan. I feel like I can do that though. Like a pretender. I'll pretend that I really like a movie, but then I don't.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:05

I wasn't trying to recommend 13 Ghosts, okay? I didn't say I loved it. I just said I wanted to watch it and review it, okay?

SPEAKER_02 1:10:12

I need to roll the tapes back from some of our past episodes when you're really excited about 13 Ghosts.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:19

Can you say nuke? I feel like it's like super, like, I don't know. Nuclear bomb. You can say nuke. Nuclear bomb. We're all we're all dying. I'm dying. I guess. What was the saying? I forgot the saying already.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:37

I don't even know. Wait, so Vera, what's your plan? What's your what's your dead zombie plan besides Costco?

SPEAKER_04 1:10:44

Obviously, just like be super nice to Mac. I'm gonna be like, hey, bud, we're friends. We can talk. No, but um yeah, so go to Costco. Um, I would get like a badass car, maybe like a Jeep or like something that like I could totally just I don't know, load up and go. Um, I would go everywhere that I wanted to go. Like, I don't know, the mountains, like I don't know, somewhere really fun. I've been to the mountains, but like all I want to see all the mountains. I want to go to Alaska. I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 1:11:17

Everything stopping you now is also gonna be stopping you as a zombie. No, like you still gotta buy gas.

SPEAKER_02 1:11:23

Okay, because here's the thing. I don't think capitalism has mentally prepared for zombies the way that Pharaoh has uh prepared for zombies. Uh I don't think your job is gonna have a contingency plan of, hey, I'm gonna need you to come to your shift if you're uh if you're zombified. You know what I mean? It's probably gonna be like a mandatory quarantine. You have the freedom, you don't have to worry about the financials, you just bite people for money. Yeah, I don't know. People are into it.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:48

Yeah, there's no more there's no more rent um once you become a zombie. You just do whatever you want. Um, what are they gonna do? You know, are they gonna tell me to nothing? I killed them if they say something. I will not pay rent, I will kill you. Um I love that you're getting call-outs.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:05

Um, she can't start living until she's dead.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:10

I know. I have to remind myself that I actually have to pay rent because I'm already in character, so I need to make sure that I get out of this character.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:19

Well, speaking of characters, I do love that we're like effectively going no gods, no masters, no brains.

SPEAKER_03 1:12:26

Yeah, they're just yellow it. I mean, I think that's the whole thing about the I think that's the whole thing about the zombie apocalypse is like you just have to be prepared to roll with whatever because nobody's gonna handle it well. You just gotta be like the one person that's like done a little better. And at least Vero has a plan for when she sucks at being human, she'll be a great zombie.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:45

Yeah. Um, I also am super like I can figure anything out. I feel like I my skill is problem solving, so I'll figure it out. Even if I have to, I mean, uh Chris can tell you me trying to set up this mic was be challenging, but I was like, I got zip ties. What do you need? I got zip ties, I got scissors, uh, I got velcro, but we figured it out. You know, I have every single thing color-coded as well.

SPEAKER_02 1:13:10

Honestly, it was impressive because I was missing one piece to attach the mic to the stand, and yet we still managed to rig it together with zip ties. So I believe in Vero's ability to survive after the pan after the uh apocalypse 100%. I'd bet on her before I bet on any anyone else.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:29

Yeah, I feel the reality is is that the best part of this movie was when Suicide died. I know I said I would date him, but also he would probably like beat me or something. So I actually low-key hate him. So I feel like I would want him to die. Too far?

SPEAKER_00 1:13:46

I mean, I don't know if it's I don't know if it's too far. He kinda has that he kinda has that vibe a little bit, right? You know, it's just like his attitude with his friends.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:54

Wait, wait, wait. But Vero, I have a very unfortunate thing to drop on you here. Since you've slashed this movie, you actually have to say the worst part of it. You have to do the opposite. Dang.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:05

Good luck. That's really hard. No, no, no. We all slashed it technically, so we all have to do a worse part. Okay.