241: The Lost Boys (1987)

SPEAKER_02 0:04

Is he as oily as your ovaries? He was more oily than my ovaries.

SPEAKER_01 0:12

Greetings and salutations, and welcome to the spooky season with Hacker Slash. If you're joining us again, welcome back. Second Shelf is mine. That's where I keep my root beers and my double thick Oreo cookies. Nobody touches the second shelf but me. If this is your first time listening, welcome to the party. We are a horror movie review podcast dedicated to telling you whether a movie is a hack, a total joke, a waste of time, or a slash.

SPEAKER_03 0:36

Totally killer. Unintended.

SPEAKER_01 0:37

We believe horror is for everyone, and as such, we're rating these movies with a perspective we've gained from our varying walks of life and the flavors of fear we fancy most. My name is Chris, I'm your friendly neighborhood slasher enthusiast. This week I'm joined by the Superfly Space Guy Mac.

SPEAKER_03 0:51

Tell me, Michael, how could a billion Chinese people be wrong?

SPEAKER_01 0:54

And the cowardly creeper Ryan. They're only noodles, Michael. This episode in the entirety of our 2022 spooky season is brought to you by our friends at Commstrips. Commstrips is helping us celebrate our 2022 theme of comfort horror. And in that spirit, today's film is a comfort pick from the Superfly Space Guy himself. Before we cozy up on the couch, though, we have some follow-up.

SPEAKER_03 1:14

Let's follow up on a movie we recently watched on opening night, Halloween ends. Goodness, the reviews have been mixed.

SPEAKER_01 1:22

Wow. Uh really controversial stuff.

SPEAKER_03 1:24

Now, this was a really fun watch for us because we got to see it together in person in a theater with Dolby. Our heads exploded from the vibrations. It was amazing for us in person. But we asked you all what you thought, and 51% of you hacked it, and 49% slashed it.

SPEAKER_02 1:40

Honestly, from what everyone's been saying, it feels like 100% of our listeners were gonna hack it. And I'm I'm impressed that it's even 50.

SPEAKER_01 1:48

I actually found that it's a really even mix of people in my life. 100% of my family hates it, but uh beyond that, I think everyone else that I've just kind of like randomly met or come across or chat about it with or her talking, you know, at Halloween Horror Nights, etc., really enjoyed this movie or utterly hated it. Um and I've seen a couple people who are just kind of middle of the road.

SPEAKER_03 2:11

Well, our patron Matt said, I sat on the fence of Halloween Kills for a long time, probably the entire year it was out. This one isn't as polarizing. It's just dumb fun. This is a slash that doesn't really need any internal debate. Even though we don't get Michael for about the first 51 minutes, I appreciated that time spent to Lori and Allison. If only that time included passable dialogue, some of the shit they make Lori say is bonkers to me.

SPEAKER_01 2:35

You know, I some of the Lori dialogue, first off, I have no complaints about Lori, uh, but I will admit that on my second and third viewing of Halloween ends, there is a particular quote, and I did find that just a little bit odd.

SPEAKER_02 2:49

Oh, I it was odd the first time, but like uh are we watching Halloween for like excellent dialogue? Is that what we're here for?

SPEAKER_01 2:57

I am. I mean, it's the devil's eyes. The the whole Loomis monologue from 19 Okay, whatever, Brian. I I know I won't win this with you. It's famously a little corny. Oh, get out of here. But let me just say this that is a really interesting take, Matt, because I have found that Halloween Kills was more dumb fun than this. Like, this did not feel very dumb fun for me. This felt very like serious and intentional.

SPEAKER_03 3:22

Well, Alex says didn't love it, but liked it and respected it. I think I I can agree with that. You know, it doesn't have to be perfect, but you can respect it for what it is and not hate it for what it's not. Camp Springwood said, was it a good Halloween film? No, not at all. Was it a good overall movie? Yes, yes, it was. All of that coming from someone who was not a Halloween fan, except H2O, Season of the Witch, and Ram Zabby's Halloween.

SPEAKER_02 3:45

I think some of our patrons that were like very passionately against this movie didn't leave comments because these comments are all like not so bad, you know? These aren't the haters. You'll see.

SPEAKER_03 3:57

That's right. Now, Lissette says, I wish I could get back the sleep that I missed to stay up and watch it.

SPEAKER_01 4:01

Now that is some hate.

SPEAKER_03 4:03

Now, Alan said slow moving, but definitely gave some closure. I think that's pretty accurate.

SPEAKER_02 4:07

I think that's very accurate. And Alan, of course, you're always right.

SPEAKER_03 4:11

Tim said, the Jason Goes to Hell of the Halloween franchise, they undermined Michael's presence.

SPEAKER_02 4:17

There's no way. I haven't seen Jason Goes to Hell, but there's no way Jason Goes to Hell is anywhere near as good as this movie.

SPEAKER_01 4:24

You know, it's it's funny because on the one hand, it feels like a very inaccurate take in terms of like the quality pound for pound between each movie. But then on another hand, in a very particular way, Tim, you're very right about that.

SPEAKER_03 4:38

And Alejandro said it's a mess, but I enjoyed it, and it's slowly moving up in my Halloween ranking. Well, I think when we were watching it, we were definitely kind of torn on how we felt. There was a lot going on, a lot to kind of sort through. So I can kind of see how you feel that way.

SPEAKER_01 4:51

Oh yeah. And we we love a chart climber, Alejandro.

SPEAKER_03 4:54

Now, the real fun discussion for this film happened over in our Discord. There are over 140 messages from our community sharing their takes, theories, and sentiments, including this one from Nathan. I have a mixed take. I feel like I could slash this movie in a vacuum if it was a standalone film about the way hurt people hurt people, but you have to take into consideration that it's the end of a trilogy on top of a 40-year history. And in that aspect, it does not deliver the goods. For me, it's a hack when looking at its place in the series. But a light slash, if I consider this movie alone with literally no history, even with a light slash in mind, some of the character decisions are super questionable. But I somehow still found myself kind of enjoying the ride, despite its flaws.

SPEAKER_02 5:42

I think the biggest issue that people have is the legacy ending with this, and not just the movie as its own thing.

SPEAKER_03 5:49

Lastly, the new blood drive has been thriving this month, and we've had so much fun welcoming new patrons into the mix. We want to send a special thanks to Tamira, Mark, Ash, or Mr. Mr. Mia, Juliet. Thank you so much for recently joining the family. If you too want to earn our fifth anniversary poster like these folks did, visit patreon.com/slash hacker slash to sign up before November 1st. It's a really dope poster. And that's our follow-up.

SPEAKER_01 6:15

While Halloween End serves as a conclusion to an iconic franchise, this week's film is an 80s classic, which currently has a modern day reboot in development. The film follows a mother and her two sons after they moved to a new town. A town they soon realize is a vampiric haven. This week we're talking about The Lost Boys. They did the clash.

SPEAKER_00 6:36

They did the co-host clash. The co-host clash. It was a podcast smell. They did the clash. And they were talking tribes. The co-host clash. Tonight on Hack or Slash.

SPEAKER_01 6:53

Now, Mac, why is this your comfort pick for the co-host Clash?

SPEAKER_03 6:57

There is just something about this movie. I I think it's the time it came out. It reminds me of this like late 80s vibe where things can kind of be spooky, but also fantastical in a way. I've seen it probably two dozen times over the years. I mean, that's an exaggeration, but I've seen it a lot. And I think I've owned it on DVD. I've probably owned a digital copy at some point that I surely lost. Um, it's just one of those things that I've seen so many times that I can't not love it somehow. Um, but I think it's also light enough and lighthearted enough that you can just like put it on and have a good time, especially during Halloween.

SPEAKER_01 7:35

Well, I love that so much. And to celebrate Max Comfort Pick, we're thrilled to announce we're celebrating a month of Comfort Horror with a giveaway open to the entire horror community. Now, if you don't already own this film, now's your chance. 80s classics, The Lost Boys and Poltergeist revolutionized the horror movie genre with original storytelling and unmatched cinematic direction. This October, reload the fascination and fear of both on Poltergeist and the Lost Boys now on 4K Ultra HD.

SPEAKER_03 8:03

Now we have five unique bundle codes to give away to our community. Join our free Discord server, visit the giveaway channel, and click the enter button daily to earn a chance to win. Winners will be announced on October 31st.

SPEAKER_01 8:17

Good luck to all of you who enter now. Let's see if this one proves just as comforting for the rest of us. Ryan, had you seen this one before?

SPEAKER_02 8:23

Of course I haven't seen Lost Boys. Nothing about Lost Boys seems like it's something that would have been on my radar that I would have seen in my days. And, you know, time period general idea of this movie. I was fully expecting to hate it and it to be extremely like miserable dialogue, hateful characters, you know, group of teenagers roll up. I just was not, you know, and no part of me was like, oh, Lost Boys, that should be great.

SPEAKER_01 8:52

That is a really surprising because I don't think I've ever heard a single bad thing about the Lost Boys. I can't imagine what about this would have given you that impression.

SPEAKER_02 8:59

Oh, just uh completely my own preconceived notions. And I'll be honest, I don't think I've ever heard anything about Lost Boys. I just know that it is a name of a movie that exists, but it could be anything, and I'm just going off like time period really brief, like the images that I see for the movie and stuff like that. It again, it all comes from me. It has nothing to do with anyone else.

SPEAKER_01 9:20

Mac, when was the most recent time that you watched this before selecting this as your comfort pick?

SPEAKER_03 9:25

You know, it's actually been a little bit. I would say probably about five years.

SPEAKER_01 9:28

Okay, so you've definitely seen it more recently than I have. I watched this movie a few times as a kid, but I haven't seen it since I was at least maybe 16, 17 years old. It's been a hot minute, and I remember the general plot. I remember kind of like the the key points. So I was expecting going into this to really discover a lot of things for the first time. And I found that when I was watching it, I was actually very wholesomely entertained. Not so entertained that I was just like on the edge of my seat or completely enraptured by the characters, but more so that this felt like the same level of entertainment I get watching Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead. It's like a fun little 80s romp.

SPEAKER_03 10:11

It it truly is. And I think, you know, when I was going into this, I've seen it a bazillion times. I know everything that happens or whatever, but I was kind of excited because I got to watch it with my wife, and she's like, I don't think I've actually seen this before. And so that was fun for me because I'm looking forward to her getting to know the characters who are fairly quirky. Um, some of the kind of hilariously tiny but clever quips between the brothers, and really the vampires are just a lot of fun. And we don't get enough of them, honestly. But it's probably good. It's probably good. Too much of a good thing ends up being a bad thing. But um, it's just overall, I think, a fun watch and not like a super dark and and super spooky watch.

SPEAKER_02 10:54

Yeah, I have to agree. I think I was impressed by how fun this movie felt. And again, like I very often don't like things like this. It's not a surprise. I don't know. It's it's just not me. It's not my thing. Like, do I want an 80s vampire movie? No. But for some reason, this one's like a very enjoyable, I don't know, interesting ride, even though it doesn't take itself seriously at all. Maybe that's part of what's good about it is that I don't feel like I needed to take it seriously at any point. I was like trying to push the movie away, and it was like, no, baby girl, just come closer, let me hold you. You know? That's what the vampire said to me.

SPEAKER_01 11:30

You make it sound like this movie was trying to abduct you.

SPEAKER_02 11:33

I like didn't want to go. I did kind of get kidnapped by this movie. It's not wrong.

SPEAKER_01 11:38

So experiencing this for the first time as an adult, I found myself super intrigued by the cinematography. And although the effects aren't, I think, some of the greatest that we've ever seen, the vampires look really good. And by really good, I of course mean really ugly. Uh, but there are even some moments towards the beginning of the film when we kind of like start seeing some things get a little spooky, we get our first few kills of the movie, and it just feels really dramatic. And to the point where there are moments where I found myself thinking, is all this just for a dramatic entrance? You know what I mean? Like it seems very like intentional and almost like comedic for these vampires.

SPEAKER_03 12:20

Well, these vampires are are obviously drama queens. Absolutely. And I think that's one of the things that surprised me the most when I was getting into this, because I've seen it a bunch, you know, there's should be no surprises, but I forgot how much I actually enjoy the vampires. They're ridiculous. Like you said, they're they're like it's like watching a bunch of teenagers goof around and stuff, but I actually had a lot of fun with that because the other characters in the movie, they're they're goofing around, they're being silly until it's time to be serious. But the vampires, even up until the very end, seem to be all about like having a good time. And their look, like you said, is is so unique. And honestly, I think it kind of defined the way that vampires would look in movies and TV shows for probably decades afterwards.

SPEAKER_01 13:03

Okay, so call me crazy, but I don't really remember a whole lot of Buffy. But I feel like the vampires, from what I remember in Buffy, look similar to this.

SPEAKER_03 13:11

100%. And uh I think the movie came out, what was it, five years after this one.

SPEAKER_02 13:16

Listen, let me show you what's really surprising about this movie. Okay. It is being attracted to a white man with sunglasses on, long hair, and like leather jackets in the 80s, doing his whole thing that everybody does that I normally would hate. And yet in this movie, it is so chef's kiss. Like he plays this character so well, and the whole time I was like, I do not want to like this man. This man is not attractive. This man is not, we're not doing this right now. But we were doing this, and it was so surprising that I had to text Chris and say, like, what's happening to me and who am I? Where is the Ryan that we all know? The eighties of it all, like please, it is trying so hard and it it succeeded.

SPEAKER_01 14:02

Well, in keeping with that, right? Like the 80s of it all, this movie has a very erotic tone. And I think that's something that people love about it, and it definitely works for it on paper. But I actually found it pretty disappointing. It's like one of the moments that I liked the least. It felt very like Celine Dion music video, uh, or late 80s, early 90s, like dramatic ballad, uh, like sex scenes where it's just gently caressing a shoulder with billowing uh canopy beds. You know what I mean? Like it felt very dramatic.

SPEAKER_02 14:36

It was definitely dramatic. Dramatic is definitely the word I'd use.

SPEAKER_03 14:40

Dramatic, but I wouldn't say like Celine Dion dramatic, I would say like a wham music video. All that being said, I think, like I mentioned earlier, this makes for a light watch. I think you can you can get into it. You can turn the lights off, you can eat some some you know candy corn or something like that, but it's not a scary movie.

SPEAKER_02 14:57

No, I don't think it's that scary. And honestly, a lot of this movie is based around like character relationships and you know, kind of like coming of age type of stuff. So I don't think the the fear w was really ever there. I don't know. Uh did you see this like Mac way, way back like when it originally came out?

SPEAKER_03 15:13

No, because I was born shortly before this movie came out. So yeah, time. Yeah, no, but I I probably saw it in the late 90s and then a lot in the 2000s.

SPEAKER_02 15:23

Yeah, I mean, I don't know. Maybe I'm misjudging. Things definitely hit in a different way in the 80s, but I this movie doesn't seem to be about fear for me, but yeah, not scary.

SPEAKER_01 15:33

Okay, I'd actually offer a counterpoint. I think this movie would have been terrifying for mothers in a particular decade, specifically the mothers who say, Oh, if someone told you to jump off a bridge, would you? The mothers who are concerned their kids are gonna just fall in with bad groups. Obviously, I don't mean that as like a serious fear. There's not a damn thing scary about this, except for how easily people are swindled or peer-pressured into doing shit they shouldn't be doing.

SPEAKER_02 16:01

Yeah, but I mean that as part of being a teenager. And it's one of those things you gotta learn where your limits are and realize, you know, if you're jumping off the bridge because you want to or because someone else wants you to. Are you jumping off bridges, Ryan? I made several many poor decisions as a teenager because I thought it would make other people like me. That's why I'm such a strong-willed woman now.

SPEAKER_03 16:18

This this movie did show me like an interesting parenting style where she's like super laissez faire about everything. And like, hey, are we friends? You know, she's like very much like a new age mom. So that that was a bit different. I I I could see how some parents watching this would be like, not my kids.

SPEAKER_02 16:35

Yeah, especially in the 80s.

SPEAKER_01 16:37

Okay, but all jokes aside, I do think that this is one of the definitive vampire movies. Obviously, there are many things that come after it. There are a few things before it that I've seen and have enjoyed, but this feels like the good blend of, as I mentioned earlier, those 80s comedic romps. And while this movie isn't nearly as funny, like I wouldn't look at this movie and think, this is lighthearted and hilarious, has just enough of an adventurous vibe to feel like a different take on vampires.

SPEAKER_03 17:07

I agree. And I think it also started things off for a certain genre of teen-friendly vampires that culminated in, well, you know, glittering, shining vampires that you all love.

SPEAKER_02 17:21

Well, I have to say, this ending lived up to the climax that we needed for me.

SPEAKER_01 17:27

This is actually the first time in a long time that I have personally felt like the movie had a perfect ending. Like, perfect, no complaints, no notes. Perfect? Yeah, like this movie ended exactly the way that I needed it to, with a little smile on my face.

SPEAKER_03 17:42

Oh, I love that. I love hearing this so much. I mean, this is my comfort horror pick, right? And so I think from start to finish, you should have a good time. And I think it finishes on such a high note that it leaves a great taste in your mouth. You know, you think back to this movie, you think back to the end, and it of course has to end with a fun little quip, just like everything begins. So, yeah, absolutely great ending.

SPEAKER_01 18:03

Well, seemingly perfect endings aside, let's go ahead and start making our way to our ratings. Now, before we actually score this movie and see how Max Comfort Pick stacks up against the rest of them, Ryan, how would you describe the gore score?

SPEAKER_02 18:16

We've got a low gore score for this one.

SPEAKER_01 18:18

And what about the animal report?

SPEAKER_02 18:19

Yeah, the animal report is good. We got a uh a feisty animal report this week, but all good.

SPEAKER_01 18:24

Yeah, honestly, some of the best animals we've seen in a long time.

SPEAKER_03 18:26

Although I would say trigger warning for taxidermy. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 18:30

Fair Mac. Well, let's go ahead and get into our ratings then. The Lost Boys from 1987. Was it a hacker or slash?

SPEAKER_03 18:36

This this is an absolute slash. This is a movie that's very memorable to me. This is a movie I've seen many a time. This is a movie I'm excited to introduce other people to. I was really excited uh for one, my my wife to watch this with me because I thought she had seen it. And she's like, I don't think I've actually seen this. So that was a great time to be able to dive into this with somebody new and then to hear your take, making you watch this, Ryan, knowing you hadn't seen this, obviously. Um, because although this is not the time period that you enjoy, I thought this would be a vibe that you would have a lot of fun with. Now, Chris is harder to to sort out because, you know, it's not, yeah, there's vampires and she likes vampires sometimes, especially in Twilight, but it's not her typical type of flick. And so I don't, I didn't know. I don't know how things are gonna, you know, how it was gonna play out. But I just personally have a good time every single time I watch it. I feel like it's something you can put on literally like once every couple months when if you were living alone. I'm I don't live alone anymore, so I've got to stagger it every couple years. But no matter how often you watch it, it's great. You can put it on the background, you can do some laundry, you can sit down with some popcorn and still like enjoy it as if it was the first time. So absolute slash.

SPEAKER_02 19:43

Well, Mac, you were not wrong. I would say uh this is a dangerous pick, knowing that I'm gonna be the one that has to watch it, because you're right, it's not my time period, but you're also correct in expecting that I would enjoy the general vibe of this movie. I wish I had like um an elaborate and dramatic like explanation, but I really don't. Honestly, this is just a good time. And again, there's something like it doesn't take itself too seriously, and there's just enough. It's like, you know how baking is like a very specific science, and like if you put too much flour or like beat it for a little too long, like stuff goes crazy. This movie feels like it has like the perfect balance of little things that we need. A little bit of drama, a little bit of, you know, I don't know if scariness is right thing, but like suspense, a little bit of character uh development, a little bit of like fighting. There's just a little bit of everything that we needed. And honestly, I can understand why you choose this for your comfort pick. It's like it feels like a comforting movie for some odd reason. And I'm thankful that I get to say that I've seen The Lost Boys now, and I really like it. So that's a slash. And Ryan do love mullets.

SPEAKER_01 20:54

Well, things seem to be trending in the right direction here, but look, this movie is imperfect, despite me believing it has an absolutely perfect ending. In a long list of my notes, I have a few complaints, and by a few I really just mean two, because damn, this movie was a actual good time. It there's a lot happening in here that I think could work very well as a specific genre of movie that is not horror, but there's just enough horror added in to really make it speak to me. I love the look of the vampires. I love the dark comedy of the vampires, I love the terrible decisions that get made along the way, and I love the relationship between these brothers, most of all. The other element of this is enjoying how much this movie just made me smile and laugh. Sometimes with it, sometimes at it. But Mac, I think overall you picked a very inoffensive movie. That's just a real chill time. It's a slash. Look at that. Good job.

SPEAKER_03 21:55

I'm so I'm so delighted.

SPEAKER_01 21:56

And with that, folks, the Lost Boys from 1987. Max submission to the co-host Clash has earned a Universal Slash. Now you can find this movie available online, and if you participate in that giveaway that we mentioned earlier, you may even own a copy of this on digital yourself. If you haven't seen this movie in a while, go check it out and then join us in the second half so we can break down the spoilers together. We'll see you in a bit.

SPEAKER_03 22:31

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SPEAKER_02 23:56

So we get quite a few kills in this movie. We have a body count of 15. To be fair, a gang of them are, you know, some of them are in kind of groups and some of them are like more intense than others, but that's a ton of kills to go from. So hopefully you guys have some good favorites.

SPEAKER_01 24:12

I do. And it's not really because it's a great favorite, it's more so because of the dramatic moment. It's Greg and Shelly when they're snatched and eaten from the car towards the beginning. Specifically because the top of the car is being ripped off. There's dramatic red lighting. And in my heart, I'd love to think there's this little gang, and they had dramatic lighting they carry around with them to really set the mood and and you know, uh really spice things up while their victims cry. Like they have a vampire dedicated to lighting.

SPEAKER_02 24:44

I think I can definitely get on board with that. It seems like something that this gang would do, you know, for the drama. They were about it.

SPEAKER_03 24:51

I love when they take the roofs off of cars. It's like so amazing. The shots they get, like just like camera work, like leading up to the actual attack on them, is amazing. Even if it's when we're inside the car and you can like hear the sound, it's just like something so atmospheric about it. Really, really enjoyable. Even if we don't like get to see, you know, fangs going into next, it's just like a really great buildup. I think my favorite though is it's David right there at the end. That's gotta be my favorite kill. And of all the vampires that die, some of them are more spectacular, and he's probably the least explosive death. And that's what I love about it. It's so ridiculously homoerotic for this film. And and I think that's like a major theme of this movie when he's I mean, you could say that like Michael and Star obviously have a thing or whatever, and it's it seems like David's really interested in keeping Star reigned in at first, but I think David's interested in Michael. He wants to turn him. You know, initially he was gonna be food and then he wasn't. And so he gets he gets like recruited in and David's just like obsessed with this dude, and he really wants him to just become one of them, be with us. And he wants him to drink his blood. That's like a big deal, right? And so at the very end, when he ends it all, and he it's like so cathartic, and you can see like in David's eyes the release that he has, and he looks like angelic just laying there, impaled, penetrated by Michael. He he seemed like he just really got into it.

SPEAKER_02 26:17

Jesus Christ. I don't know if I took it as quite that intense of a uh I don't know, innuendo, but it's there. There's there's some vibes in this movie, you know, they're some people-seeking people, that's for sure. But my personal favorite kill is Marco because it's so straightforward, just a stake to the heart, but the the the goo that ensues from that kill is so disgusting and like um it seems horrifically sticky and also maybe a little erotic, but it's disgusting. And um, I just love that they just crawled up there and just stabbed the dude in the heart and he's just gone. Rest in peace.

SPEAKER_01 26:56

Rest in peace, indeed. Let me also just say though that uh I really enjoyed shout out bonus death to Paul for being pushed into the tub by Nanuk, the protector. Great dog. I also had a Seburin Husky by the same name when I was a small child. Rest in peace, you're a good boy. And uh this movie gave me a lot of nostalgic joy when I saw that.

SPEAKER_02 27:19

Yeah, I mean, honestly, I think we could shout out like basically all the kills in that last scene were great. Um, that being one of them, Dwayne being the other one, and of course, you know, the car being lifted off. There's just some good kills here. For the 80s, we get some quality and we see some stuff on screen that's enjoyable.

SPEAKER_03 27:35

The vampire deaths, I think, are just like really remarkable because they mention, they tell us each one is gonna be slightly different from the other, and they pretty much deliver on that. I mean, we do get that that great death is probably my second favorite, which is the stereo death with the sparking and the hands flying off and all of that. Just like it's a show. It's really dramatic, it's a lot going on, and it took a long time to film that. So I think was it worth it? Yes. But some of the other deaths that were like less remarkable are also really great because they're pretty simple. I think obviously the GUI explosion is like gross, and that's why it was so effective.

SPEAKER_01 28:14

Okay, gooey explosions are absolutely effective, and I think something else that's more effective in this movie, even more so than just the gore itself, is actually the lighting. I know I joked over earlier about these little vampires carrying around red spotlights to just like really make any scene a dramatic moment. But there's even moments where, you know, when the gang is kind of showing up as Michael is transforming and his brother is realizing what's going on. There's a a point where it seems almost like a Celine Dion music video, right? And you have these lights flashing in from outside of the outside of the house. And even in its darkest moments, even in its most dimly lit moments, like by candlelight in their kind of layer, this movie is absolutely beautiful, beginning to end.

SPEAKER_02 29:00

Yeah, I feel like this movie is shot in a way that makes it feel like an unrealistic setting. It feels like we're in like a fantasy world where vampires are real and it is a gang of teenagers that are running around and and drinking blood and like I don't know, there's just something realistic and unrealistic at the exact same time that works perfectly and like lighting, music, all of that. It really contributes to the feeling of the city.

SPEAKER_03 29:23

There's something kind of just special feeling about it. It reminds me of other 80s movies that I love. I love the movie Labyrinth, an absolute favorite of mine. I love the movie The Dark Crystal. They are 100% fantasy, and there is something, like you said, really fantasy about this movie. It's got a good balance of fantasy and comedy and horror and everything. But there's something where it's like, we know this is not real, and it's okay that it feels a bit unreal. And I think one of the most effective shots that we get a couple times in the film, my favorite visual of the film, is that like, how the hell did they nail a drone shot before drones existed? That like closing in that we get with the camera, I'm sure they used something cool like a crane or something, but it was beautiful and it was amazing and impressive. Now we would just go look at it and go, oh, somebody flew a drone in, but they didn't have that back then. And it was probably a lot more work and a lot more dangerous and a lot, a lot more like effort to achieve a really fantastic shot.

SPEAKER_02 30:16

I was thinking the exact same thing because it is one of those things that we kind of take for granted now. And I was like, man, how did they do that? Like, even a crane, that like how could you have it all moving at the right speed and everything? I don't know. Those shots are beautiful. I have two favorite visual elements. One I've already kind of touched on, so I'm just gonna say really briefly: Michael. Okay, 10 out of 10. Thank you. The other one is that shot where they're swooping in and the roof is pulled off the car. Like, it's just so cool. She looks so filled with terror. And yeah, I mean, again, it's it's it's before it's time. It just hits different, and you're like, man, that's so good. Honestly, I'd still be impressed now because I feel like I haven't seen a lot of roof ripped off, swoop in from the sky, kind of shots. Uh, it was just so good.

SPEAKER_03 31:03

You know, I think they're they're able to like let it be. Now we'd have to switch back and forth and like have 15 cuts of inside the car and then outside the car and inside the car and outside the car. And they're like, it's okay to just look at their faces from above.

SPEAKER_01 31:15

You know, you mention the roofs being torn off of the cars, and I know I talked about loving the lighting there, and it's not actually one of my favorite scenes, although it is a really great moment. My favorite scene is actually incredibly long, and it's Michael following with the gang on their motorcycles, riding through the fog, it looking like a really great continuation of Grease 2. Cool rider, who's that guy? Where did he come from? And then we get to this point where they're at the bridge, and I it's it's this really silly moment of okay, if someone told you to jump off a bridge, would you? I mean, this guy is kind of dumb, he kind of does, but I loved this this moment of them going over the edge and seeing how concerned he was, and then seeing the tension of a train coming and holding on to it for dear life. The way that that was shot, the top down, looking at these bodies just disappearing into the fog, it really added this like whimsical element to the whole mood while also really turning the what the fuck is going on meter all the way to the right.

SPEAKER_02 32:25

Yeah, I think that scene is amazing. I have hung out under railroad tracks before, and um, probably not intelligently, but like, yeah, it's just so cool the way they drop down, the way they look like bats hanging there. Freaking awesome. My favorite scene comes shortly after that, and it is Michael trying to eat his brother. And I think my favorite thing about it is obviously the way the dog shows up and and defends him. That's 10 out of 10. Love it. But also it's just like the first moment where you're like, oh no, things are not going well. Like anytime someone's trying to eat their brother, it's not been a good time. You've got some bad influences going on for you. So yeah, that was one of my favorite scenes because I think it really sets a tone for like the fact that he doesn't have control of what's going on with him.

SPEAKER_03 33:08

And it really shows that he's trying to fight these impulses that he's now feeling. It also shows that Nanook is one of the gooddest of good boys.

SPEAKER_02 33:16

Literally is such a heavenly little angel.

SPEAKER_03 33:19

Like, he doesn't kill Michael. He knows who he is a little bit, right? So he's he still just like lets him know who's boss and that he's not gonna take a shit. I think my favorite scene though is when Michael and the Lost Boys are hanging out down in the cave and they're eating Chinese food. And he's still like new to what's happening, right before he's being, you know, converted into a vampire. And he's all about like trying to fit in with these guys and kind of like being vulnerable and just kind of going with the flow, seeing where they take him. He's still not completely bought in, he's still got some fear, but he's he's rolling with it, he's trying to do his best because whatever, these guys seem cool and he wants to be one of them, even though he's pretending like he doesn't.

SPEAKER_02 34:00

That maggot scene is horror, okay? I've I've said many times how much I cannot stand maggots. Oh, it's so creepy. And like they're messing with his head like that. Oh, I hate it.

SPEAKER_03 34:12

It was funny though, because my wife's watching this with me and she was like, like, why does he think that they're maggots or whatever? And I'm like, Oh, because they glamoured him. And she's like, glamoured? What the heck does that mean? And I was like, Oh, that's like what vampires do when they hypnotize you. They glamour you. That's the thing in vampire lore now.

SPEAKER_02 34:26

Yeah, I just learned that in The Craft.

SPEAKER_03 34:28

And that's what's so fun about that scene is like they're playing with him, they're toying with him, but the entire time David has intense eye contact. It reminds me of a couple other movies, like A Most Violent Year, uh, with Oscar Isaac trying to be really intimidating, direct eye contact, long pauses, showing who's in charge, really like sizing up other people. And David's really doing that here. He's sizing up Michael, he's messing with him, but at the same time, he's like judging his reactions. And I think that's effective because Kiefer Sutherland here really delivers as David. And because, you know, we get a Michael that's still a little bit scared, but still like also like trying to prove that he's a tough guy, even though we know he's a big softie. Did you enjoy David as a vampire? Out of all the vampires you've seen, like Underworld, you know, Buffy, etc.

SPEAKER_02 35:16

I would say yes, but I mean, he doesn't like visually do it for me the way that like Michael does. The vampires here have like a certain kind of like prosthetic look that is not my favorite. I really like the way that like the 30 days of night vampires kind of look, where they don't look so much like a monster, I'd say. Um David's not the worst, but I it I wasn't like obsessed with their vampire look. I'm just obsessed with their energy as vampires.

SPEAKER_01 35:41

Okay. But did you like Michael as a vampire?

SPEAKER_02 35:45

I like Michael as in everything.

SPEAKER_01 35:47

Oh yeah, you did, you little horn dog.

SPEAKER_02 35:50

No, it's not even that. I just don't know why. He just like pulls it off so well. And like for sure, partially it's the sunglasses and the hair and whatever. I don't know. I just I wanted him to be okay. I didn't want him to hurt his family. But yeah, he he he do do it as a vampire, that's for sure.

SPEAKER_01 36:06

I think he do do it as a character overall. I really enjoyed Michael and his brother in this movie. The vampires are cool for sure. I think they're they're easily in like the top ten um in terms of like uh in terms of like prominent vampires in horror. They they fall somewhere within that category. But I think I just was so much more invested. Obviously, what you should be was like the main hero of the film, right? And thinking about like more like the protagonist side of thing. I think Max was a plot twist that we all saw coming, and I was never really surprised by it. So I think that was a kind of like a weaker spot of the movie for me. But really, what my emotional investment in in Michael did was have me wonder how the fuck are they gonna live with this the rest of their time here? You know what I mean? Like, what happens after the credits roll? And I know there have been other Lost Boys movies, uh, but I have not seen them.

SPEAKER_02 37:02

All I could think about is how is this poor child gonna live being okay with the fact that his brother tried to kill him? The trauma. Okay, and you know they weren't about therapy in the 80s.

SPEAKER_03 37:10

He didn't realize it though. He just like saw that Michael got hurt by the dog and he didn't understand why, and then he realized he was a vampire. But shortly thereafter, there wasn't like a he's trying to attack me moment. There was a oh my gosh, he's a vampire, she's gonna kill me. And then Michael's like, no, really, like I am your brother, please help me. He's like, Okay, cool.

SPEAKER_02 37:29

I mean, yes, but still, it's still there. The idea, it's still there. And then, like, you know, I wouldn't go anywhere without that dog. I need his protection.

SPEAKER_03 37:38

Okay, so that leads me to the very end. So Nanook, absolute rock star, but the grandpa, total rock star. Did you see that coming?

SPEAKER_01 37:46

Oh, I fucking loved it so much. The perfect ending, the perfect ending where he admits that he's known about the vampires all along. Such a fucking great bow to wrap this whole movie up. I love the shit out of this grandfather. One of the best grandfathers in movies for me.

SPEAKER_02 38:04

He was pretty great. I feel like he plays the like hard grandpa, you know, trying to keep people in line. But I think seeing him come out in the end was uh I wouldn't, I don't want to say it was predictable. It wasn't predictable, but I wasn't surprised. I was happy, but not surprised.

SPEAKER_01 38:17

It's because you realize he's a wily old coot.

SPEAKER_03 38:19

He really is, and he sets this tone for himself, like you mentioned, where he's like really strict and it has his rules, but he also seems kind of like a hippie. But when they take the car, he's just like, Oh, did you make sure to like fill it up? That's one of the rules here you gotta fill it up if you take the car. When in the beginning, he he seems like no one's allowed to drive this car. Absolutely not. Stays in the garage and they just steal it, and he's like, Okay, put some gas in it.

SPEAKER_02 38:42

But that's the thing with grandparents, you gotta push them, you know. They say they have rules, but then you push them and find out they're not really as tight as they as they they say they are.

SPEAKER_03 38:50

I I think it's hilarious though how much um he was like one of the boys when it was about uh, you know, talking about getting some action.

SPEAKER_02 38:58

I love we love old old men talking about getting some action.

SPEAKER_03 39:02

Putting some Windex on for uh for Cologne.

SPEAKER_02 39:04

Yeah. It was horrific.

SPEAKER_03 39:06

Okay, so one of the big quirks of this movie, 100% the Frog Brothers. I love them. I want to see a little bit more of them. I do feel like it's I don't know, I feel like it's Edgar Frog is the Frog brother, and Alan Frog is not so much that important. It's 100% Corey Feldman here.

SPEAKER_01 39:24

I mean, I'm not a crazy fan of Corey Feldman overall, but I do think this is probably my favorite role he's ever had.

SPEAKER_02 39:32

Yeah, I I I'll agree. Again, I'm it's not one that I'm like again, Corey Feldman, cool. I don't know, uh child actors always do a weird thing for me, but it's not bad. I like it here.

SPEAKER_03 39:43

I also have to say that like Diane Weist playing this like super cute mom was uh yeah, it was super cute. And I realized how old I am when I decided that at 36 I found her very attractive in this film.

SPEAKER_01 39:58

Really, what has that transformation been like for you?

SPEAKER_03 40:01

You know, when you're younger and you see her and she's like, oh, she's like the kooky, silly, you know, mom in this movie. And then now that I'm older and I'm like, oh, she's like kooky, silly, and also attractive, and I like her short hair.

SPEAKER_01 40:14

And also I would date her. I'd be a father to those children.

SPEAKER_02 40:17

I just I felt bad. Like, I don't know. I I I think like the I'm a single mom thing is always like very tough, and I just felt so guilty for her because you know it was so clear that she was dating a bad person, and he was clearly like hunting her out, kind of. And, you know, she just she just wanted to go on a nice date with somebody that treated her right, and she deserves that. Single moms have it hard out here, and especially with boys, sons, oh, it's rough.

SPEAKER_03 40:43

And that little moment at the beginning where grandpa mentions the fact that like she didn't get anything from the divorce and it was amicable and she just wanted like a clean break. And he's like, he found that surprising, and she's like, you know, it's just better for everybody because she's so kind-hearted.

SPEAKER_02 40:58

She deserved better than this man. She deserves to go on nice dates with a nice man that wants to spend life with her, okay.

SPEAKER_01 41:04

You know what else she deserves, Ryan? She deserves a son, specifically an older son, who doesn't put his dirty fucking shoes on the bed, on his sheets, nay, his pillows. Disgusting. What was this man thinking? I don't give a shit if he just came in from outside falling into the fog. No, this man was absolutely filthy. Can you imagine?

SPEAKER_03 41:28

The disrespect in this household. Is this one of the two complaints you had about this movie?

SPEAKER_01 41:33

It is. It is.

SPEAKER_03 41:34

I I do love that it's so limited. It's really hard for me to pick a worst part of this film because this is something that I have loved for so long. And it's it's like, is there anything that annoys me about this movie? Not really. Is there anything that I find ruins any of the plot of this movie? Not really. I feel like there's not anything that really tears it down for me. I don't know that I can actually contribute to the worst part. I think one of the most frustrating parts, I would say, perhaps, is the dating life with Max. And it's it's frustrating because it's like secondhand embarrassment almost. And that's I think what I what I hate watching when you watch like sitcoms, a secondhand embarrassment.

SPEAKER_02 42:15

Oh yeah, that is really fucking cringy. Yeah, I mean, again, she deserved better. This is it, it is a bit of an embarrassing moment.

SPEAKER_03 42:23

Perhaps though, even worse than that, is having a much older human being playing a teenager. The fact that her son is supposed to be how he's a teenager in this movie, right? Like Michael's supposed to be like, what, 17, 18? Maybe 16. Not 16. He can't, he's way too old for 16. And then you look at him, you're like, that's a 30-year-old man. I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_02 42:42

Yeah, but I this is the time of everyone constantly being so much older than the role that they're cast to be. That's just expected at this point. Honestly, finding a worse part of this movie is pretty tough because even the things that aren't like amazing are kind of like on par with the rest of the movie. Like, tonally, this movie sticks to its own script where it's not constantly like getting a little crazy or weird things are going on. It's all kind of along the same lines. So if something's not perfect, it still works for me. I'm just gonna go with something silly, which is the shirtless, thick boy, naked saxophone player, dancing man. At the beginning of this movie, we didn't need that. I mean, I don't know. That's such a specific thing, but it it did for a moment scare me to think, oh god, this is gonna be horrific. Because I thought we were gonna get just some, you know, some 80s nonsense. That was our only only true little bit of it. That's all I got. It's hard to find a worse part here.

SPEAKER_01 43:37

I think that's the most specific character description you've ever given on this show.

SPEAKER_02 43:41

Yeah, because he's on screen for like 10 seconds, but truly it was the first thing where I was like, oh, please, no, not this.

SPEAKER_03 43:47

And your favorite, he was very oiled up, very sweaty.

SPEAKER_02 43:50

Oh yeah. So oily and like oiled up, and and he's he's fit, but he's like 45, maybe. I don't know. It's so weird. Why and Playing a saxophone. Who is dressed like that playing a saxophone? I don't know if y'all have ever seen people play a saxophone with a shirt off. I haven't, and why?

SPEAKER_03 44:07

Because this movie is incredibly homoerotic. I've like I mentioned it earlier, but that's 100%. I'm not into it necessarily. I just find it kind of entertaining. There's always a subtext. And maybe everyone, it's not just me, maybe a lot of people read into that, but I think there's a clear subtext.

SPEAKER_01 44:24

Oh, we love a good subtext. It's all we can cling to. And it's all we all we were able to cling to for many, many decades. And you know, I think the depth of that subtext really contributes well to its rewatchability. I'm actually surprised that I, you know, considering the quality of this movie, having watched it now, I'm surprised I haven't seen it more frequently than than I have in the past. And I think I'm gonna change it. I think this will be a good, you know, every once in a while rotation for me.

SPEAKER_02 44:50

This is definitely one I wouldn't mind watching again, like very casually. Like, oh my god, let's, you know, like you guys were talking about when when you were here with Matt, Chris. You just hang out on the couch with some friends, watch a movie. This is the perfect one for that.

SPEAKER_01 45:03

Maybe in your case, you're hanging out on the couch alone in slate, no one's around. You're feeling some kind of way. Okay, I didn't say that.

SPEAKER_02 45:11

I mean, I just know you liked Michael so much, so it it was nice, but I'm not that kind of person. Um it's a horror movie, okay? Okay. Not it's vampires. I'm not a vampire girl. You are now.

SPEAKER_03 45:22

Here's where we are. Give us like six to eight months, maybe sooner, maybe sooner, right? And you're hanging out with somebody and they're doing the whole Netflix scroll garbage. What should we watch? I don't know, what should we watch? We're gonna watch The Lost Boys right now. Just make a decision and watch it with them.

SPEAKER_02 45:37

It's the perfect movie for you want to watch something, but yet you don't really want to sp to only pay attention to a movie. You kind of want it to just be in the background or you want to have a little bit more conversation with somebody than just sitting silently. This is the perfect one for it.

SPEAKER_03 45:51

And I think what adds to that rewatch value is if you are sitting, chatting, goofing off, and you're watching this, and you happen to like actually dive into a moment, you can enjoy it and like watch it for 10 minutes without speaking and then bring up your regular conversation again. Like you can get into it and then you can kind of dip out for a second.

SPEAKER_01 46:09

Well, while this movie can be dipped into and out of, let's see if Matt can dip us into some knowledge with fact or fiction.

SPEAKER_03 46:15

Number one, Kiefer Sutherland wasn't really into the idea of being in this movie until he found out who was gonna be part of the soundtrack.

SPEAKER_02 46:24

Ooh, I can't believe we didn't talk about it sooner. The soundtrack is so good for this, so I wanna say fact.

SPEAKER_03 46:30

Oh, yeah, this is a fact. So he heard that you know Joel Schumacher had NXS and Jimmy Barnes lined up, and he was like, Yeah, dog, I'm in. He hung out in Australia a little bit, he got like a taste of their music, so he was into it all of a sudden. Number two, apparently Joel Schumacher wanted Corey Feldman to watch Sylvester Stallone and Chuck Norris films leading into this movie.

SPEAKER_02 46:53

Uh, I want this to be fiction.

SPEAKER_03 46:56

Oh no, this is a fact. So he wanted his character to seem like other action stars, right? So to feel a little bit like Rambo. And I think if you watch this again, you'll see that like how serious he is and how like he's completely bought into his character, and he's really hardcore about killing vampires. He's even got the little like you know, like raspiness to his voice, and they've got the military-esque clothing going on. So yeah, he recommended that he watch it. Number three. So let's flash back. We're in the bathtub scene, right? So Paul the vampire dipping into that bathtub, grasping at the grasping at the Frog Brothers, trying to get out, and apparently he grasped so hard that he actually pinched Jamison Newlander's skin and hurt him.

SPEAKER_02 47:41

I would say it seems plausible. I'll go fact.

SPEAKER_03 47:45

Oh, he grasped at something. It was his chest hair. So he actually hurt him because at 16 years old this dude had, you know, like a rug of chest hair, apparently. And so he actually pulled on some of that chest hair, which of course hurts.

SPEAKER_01 47:59

Not the chest hair. That is absurdly disgusting.

SPEAKER_03 48:02

Nothing better than a bearskin rug. And number four, Kiefer Sutherland shedding a tear. Actually, his tears on screen.

SPEAKER_02 48:10

This feels like a fact. It's the 80s, they probably like pinched him or something.

SPEAKER_03 48:14

It's a fact, but not for the reason you'd think. They're freaking contact lenses. I don't know if you were worried about that the entire time they showed up as vampires, but while I was watching that, I knew I like I'm sitting there thinking, like, man, they had super thick contact lenses in the 80s. Anytime you had to change, seriously, what an eye looked like. And so apparently when they got to that scene, that's a real tear because those contacts grind against your eyes hardcore.

SPEAKER_02 48:37

Honestly, I have worn, you know, like cosmetic lenses in 2022 or, you know, in the past couple of years, and they're still not that comfortable. I can't imagine what they were like in the 80s. They were probably like, you know, when like contact lenses used to literally be glass. It was probably like that still. Probably not, but I don't know, close enough. I bet it was miserable.

SPEAKER_03 48:58

Well, I know that when I go into the sun, I definitely shed a tear, but that's been fact or fiction.

SPEAKER_01 49:03

Well, there you have it, folks. The Lost Boys from 1987, the comfort pick nominated by Mac for this year's co-host Clash, hasard a universal slash. Now we certainly had a lot to talk about here, but it doesn't end here by any means. We want to know what you think. You can join in on the conversation by hanging out with us for free over in our Discord and entering our giveaway to own the Lost Boys on Digital. Click the link in our show notes to learn more and sign up.

SPEAKER_03 49:26

If you've enjoyed listening to this episode, consider becoming one of our patrons. Visit patreon.com slash hacker slash to enjoy more of the show with early access, extended episodes, bonus content, and live shows.

SPEAKER_01 49:37

We'll see you next time, folks. And remember, don't ever invite a vampire into your house. It renders you powerless. Bye.

SPEAKER_02 49:54

So the question that needs to be asked, what was it like Mac and Chris being roommates for a weekend in Virginia?

SPEAKER_01 50:00

Oh my gosh, can I tell you that I have not experienced such hospitality in many a decade? At least two.

SPEAKER_02 50:07

I'm so deeply unsurprised by that because Caroline, a Mac's wife, is such a loving soul that I would expect nothing less.

SPEAKER_03 50:15

I'm I'm delighted to hear that, and I'm sure she will be too. I mean, it was it was a pleasure having Chris here. It was kind of like having a roommate. I mean, I I did work a bunch, so there's that. I was sick for a day, so there's that. Um, but it was it was lovely. We're very much like homebodies, and we like to whenever we can chill, we do. Um, usually our time off is spent, you know, cleaning, running errands, doing groceries, the boring adult stuff we all do. Um, but this time it was cool to be able to hang.

SPEAKER_01 50:43

Oh, absolutely. Not only is uh Caroline such a great host, but Mac makes a bomb pasta dish. That was thrilling. Uh, one of my favorite nights was just us uh hanging out in the living room, watching a movie, watching uh was I think there's someone in your house, I think that's what it was called on Netflix.

SPEAKER_03 51:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 51:01

And uh just eating some good food. It was a fantastic time.

SPEAKER_03 51:04

To be fair, not my recipe. I just happened to make it this time, but it is pretty good. It's like Black of Feta, bunch of tomatoes, it all you know, bakes up and you mix it all together into a sauce, and we use some some chickpea pasta, tasty stuff.

SPEAKER_02 51:19

Okay, sorry. Are we giving Mac credit for two-year-old TikTok pasta?

SPEAKER_03 51:26

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 51:26

Because that is not correct. Like, we can't be putting on his resume makes a good pasta dish when it's the one pasta dish from TikTok that everyone's tried.

SPEAKER_01 51:35

So listen here, I am not on TikTok, so it's new to me, and it was delicious, and Mac made it. So therefore, Mac gets the credit in my eyes.

SPEAKER_03 51:44

First of all, normally what I would make, I would I would saute onions, bell peppers, ground beef, that kind of stuff, right? And then that would go in with tomato sauce and just like simmer for as long as I could. Um, and then that would be the sauce. But we didn't want to blow up anybody's esophagus, so you know, we went with some a little bit a little bit fresher, a little bit tick a little bit more TikTok.

SPEAKER_02 52:07

Let me tell you how you can really spice up that that world, okay? Instead of feta, you put you guys know what borson cheese is, like the little like soft garlicky cheese that you can like dip.

SPEAKER_01 52:19

No idea. Sounds great though.

SPEAKER_02 52:21

Oh my god. Instead of putting a block of feta, you put a a chunk of boys and cheese. It's amazing, slightly creamier than the feta. It's so freaking good.

SPEAKER_03 52:31

Well, in either case, um, I do love some pasta and I love hanging out. And we also watched a movie, and technically it's a horror movie, so it's on the list eventually. Uh, but it was nice to be able to just like stream something randomly and just kind of go back and forth until we pick something. We're all all three of us are like, we don't care. Just like put whatever on until we could like come up to an agreement of some sort.

SPEAKER_01 52:52

Truly, I don't feel I don't know that I've ever felt quite as home as in like amongst my people than in Mac and Caroline's home, because it was just the perfect chill vibe. I will say though, something I have learned about myself is that I completely forgot about the period of conditioning and adapting that I had to do living in Virginia to the climate, because immediately upon getting there, and not only in like the slightly cooler weather, but then Mac, you keep your house at a very like cold temperature, which in hindsight is very refreshing considering coming from an environment with no AC. Um, but my lips were immediately chapped. Like I had to like just like figure out, oh wait, I think I do need the natural moisture that's baked into the humidity in South Florida.

SPEAKER_02 53:37

Which is funny because when we don't live in a dry climate at all, it's not dry here, and it's hardly even dry compared to Florida. It's just different. And I forget that like when I used to go back and forth from Florida all the time, my eczema on my hands would like completely change like the day you land in Florida or Virginia, like one way or the other, it's a completely different scenario.

SPEAKER_03 53:58

See, that's that's weird to me because it's like if I get into high humidity, I get really bad like eczema psoriasis stuff going on. And then if I get into no humidity, I get the same thing. But if if I'm at like a happy medium, I'm okay. So if I'm like 50, 60 percent, which is I feel like what we get up here, it's all it's all good. It's all gravy.

SPEAKER_02 54:16

But again, like humidity in Florida and Virginia, very similar, especially in the in the summer. It's just it's a funny thing.

SPEAKER_01 54:25

My skin has never felt more different. Yes, this is normal.

SPEAKER_03 54:28

Well, it's also probably from hanging out in 68 degree air conditioning all day.

SPEAKER_01 54:32

Honestly, that was amazing. I needed it after a year of no AC, that was fantastic. And I am happy to report to you, my dearest friends, to our patrons and listeners in the chat who have been on this journey with me. I now have functioning AC in my home. Wow. Ain't it something? I know. 2022, baby. Are we poor for the experience? Yes, but uh, I actually cracked open my vents and now dust and stuff is is flying out of it. But I've never been happier to see it. I love that phrase. It's great. I'm wearing a hoodie for the first time in months.

SPEAKER_03 55:01

Your sleep is going to improve so vastly.

SPEAKER_01 55:04

I'm ready for it, honestly. Oh, thank you, Zach, for the for the applause in the chat. A literal standing ovation. You know, sometimes we work hard and we try to deserve things.

SPEAKER_03 55:13

Treat yourself.

SPEAKER_01 55:16

We b sorry, motorcycles. Very loud motorcycles. Hold on. You all need to see what Ryan looks like right now.

SPEAKER_02 55:28

Yeah, obviously, I need a quote. We didn't discuss quotes at all.

SPEAKER_03 55:31

They're only noodles, Michael.

SPEAKER_02 55:34

They're only noodles, Michael? The maggots. Okay. Ryan, had you seen this one before? Well, you know that I haven't. Lost Boys doesn't even seem like something I would have seen in the world.

SPEAKER_01 55:47

Of course not. So what were you expecting?

SPEAKER_02 55:50

I was gonna go. Okay, go for it. It just I it took me a second to realize, and then I had to, you know, okay. Go for it. I'm gonna start that whole thing over.

SPEAKER_01 55:59

Thank you. Okay, so listen, Ryan has been attracted to many a man in the movies that we've watched, mostly Yahya from Candyman. But this was a different level of horn dog Ryan that I wasn't ready for.

SPEAKER_02 56:15

I mean, I don't know if I would go quite that far, but uh yeah, I just I I was not prepared for this, let me tell you. It's just not my not my jam, you know, especially the 80s of it all. Like, please, it is trying so hard and it it succeeded.

SPEAKER_01 56:33

Okay, Ryan, I need you to know that I didn't do that. Alexis did.

SPEAKER_02 56:38

I don't believe you.

SPEAKER_01 56:39

I swear to God, Alexis did this one as one of the last episodes she did.

SPEAKER_02 56:43

I don't want to tell you guys this, but Chris was also attracted to this white man, okay? Thank you so much.

SPEAKER_01 56:48

Okay, well, obviously he's objectively attractive. How can you look at that man and not think he's good looking? But um, no, but for real, because I am very OCD where the only pictures I pick for characters are pictures of them in the movie, and this was not.

SPEAKER_02 57:03

Yeah, whatever. I'd I just want to live in the world where this is the photo that you chose for his bio.

SPEAKER_01 57:08

Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure.

SPEAKER_02 57:09

That's all I want.

SPEAKER_01 57:11

Okay, look, I wasn't gonna bring up Twilight first, but now that you've done it, I will say that the motorcycles in this movie, specifically as they ride through the fog, made me think, damn, Twilight would have been better with motorcycles. Not just the motorcycle that Bella and Jacob rode.

SPEAKER_02 57:27

I just need to clarify that you all is actually not the correct thing to say here. I don't like Twilight. And so, Mac, you and I are the majority right now. It's just Chris on the outside. Twilight person, obsessed, can't leave it alone.

SPEAKER_01 57:41

Mac is talking to me and the very many patrons in the chat right now who like it too.

SPEAKER_02 57:46

And there's a bunch of patrons that are like, damn, why are we always talking about Twilight lovingly?

SPEAKER_01 57:51

You know, it's all fun in games until you find out how gross a dude a director is. I'm looking at you, Jeepers Creepers. Turns out it's most of them. I thought you had more to say based on your facial reactions, Ryan.

SPEAKER_02 58:04

Me, no, I was realizing that I don't know uh what I was gonna decide for the course course. Right before you ask me.

SPEAKER_01 58:11

Okay, got it.

SPEAKER_03 58:14

No, I think they're they're able to like let it be. Now we'd have to switch back and forth and like have 15 cuts of inside the car and then outside the car and then inside the car and outside the car, and they're like, it's okay to just look at their faces from above.

SPEAKER_01 58:26

You know, really though, it's an interesting mechanic to consider having the strength and force to be able to rip a roof off of a car, but not be so strong that you just topple the whole car over. Physics, vampire physics, doesn't make doesn't matter. Stop physicsing. Nobody asked for that. I'm just saying it's impressive. The level of precision, you know, like a really apex predator to be able to do that.

SPEAKER_03 58:52

It's about having that control, you know.

SPEAKER_01 58:55

Shy sardines in a tin. Shy hate you. One hand is usually grabbing the tin while the other hand's ripping the cover off. Not wrong.

SPEAKER_02 59:04

Try to get the try to get that can open without with just one hand, okay? What a point, Chris. What a point.

SPEAKER_01 59:11

Yeah, I will buy some and have them try it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 59:15

You you pull you apply pressure with your thumb and pull back with your finger.

SPEAKER_01 59:18

What's I don't think so. There has to be enough weight. Like, yeah, you can do that mechanic, uh, Mac, with uh like can of soda.

SPEAKER_02 59:26

I was just gonna say, at the beginning you can get that first that first bit up, but how are you gonna get it off, like fully off the top without holding it down?

SPEAKER_03 59:34

That's strong thumb pressure.

SPEAKER_02 59:35

Okay, but the thumb has to move once you're getting the the last bit away. Just hand things. This does seem like something that mothers and grandmothers could do without even considering it.

SPEAKER_01 59:47

Okay, so quick side note this reminds me in the craft episode, I thought about my food rules. Uh, I don't like cream, cream-filled things, such and such, such and such, and then I added like maggots to the end of that. At Halloween Horror Nights, there was a corn dog, another thing that I do not enjoy, despite loving hot dogs. And it was a themed food. They called it the maggot covered cheese dog. I added a photo of it in the live stream chat. Absolutely looks disgusting. So many people were eating them. I I don't understand why.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:18

I think I could eat it because if you don't have the word maggot there, you wouldn't know. But I don't know. The idea of maggots really ruins me, like as a human.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:28

It's it's pretty disgusting.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:31

I just found out who Kiefer Sutherland was. Just now. No fucking way, Ryan. From 24? I had no idea. If you would have asked me if that was his name, I would have said no. I would have bet a million dollars his name was not Kiefer Sutherland. Do you know who his father is? Senior Kiefer Sutherland. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:46

Google it. Google it now. I have to watch your face react to this when you discover this.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:53

I'm so upset.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:54

Kiefer. First off, Kiefer could not be a worse name in the entire world.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:58

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:00

Donald Sutherland.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:01

Yes. Look at that picture of him.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:03

Look at his discography of films, as you like to put it.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:06

I was gonna say you're you're waiting for me to have a realization, aside from his name. Um, from MASH. I'm just kidding. Jesus Christ. Oh, from this horrible movie that I just watched? Yes. Wait, you guys don't know that I watched this. Oh, okay, that, yeah, no. I mean, I'm not against him as a person, but holy tits, I hated that movie, Mr. Harrigan's Phone.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:28

Did you really? We looked at the trailer, it looked fun.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:30

I really did not enjoy it. It is a long journey to get to the hallway. It's a two-hour ride from your from your bedroom into your hallway. So far, it takes forever. One very slow step at a time. And then you're like, wow, all I did was make it to the hallway. That sucked.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:50

I'm really surprised you never realized that this was key for Southern the whole time. Did you enjoy David as a vampire? Out of all the vampires you've seen, like Underworld, you know, Buffy, etc.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:02

No. Um, I mean uh in like a funny way, kind of, but no. I mean, I didn't like at the end, it's kind of uh it's kind of here's a here's a vampire prosthetic on my face kind of vibes. Does that make sense? Interesting. I liked his character as a vampire, but I didn't like how he looked as a vampire.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:21

Oh, okay. Would you have preferred him without their distinct makeup with just the fangs?

SPEAKER_02 1:02:27

I really like 30 days of night vampire vibes, where they they it's still obviously vampire, but it's not like too fake. But I think that their look in this movie like matches, like his look here matches the the nature of this film being so like kind of fantastical while still realistic. But I don't know, they're not my favorite look for vampires, but I'm not hating. I like the gang more than I like David as a vampire, if that makes sense. Old Man Vampire wasn't doing it for me.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:52

Oh, you're talking about Max?

SPEAKER_02 1:02:54

Oh, yeah, I've been talking about Max the whole time. Jesus Christ. Wait a minute. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:02

David, blonde vampire. Gang leader. Jesus Christ. All right, we'll just take that back. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:08

Love interest to Michael.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:10

I'm gonna run that back.

unknown 1:03:11

God.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:12

I looked, I'm looking at the list and yeah, never mind. Um so the original question was Did I enjoy Max as a vampire?

SPEAKER_03 1:03:21

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:21

Most of what I said still does.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:23

I asked if you enjoyed David as a vampire. David as a vampire. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:27

Imagine you go on a date and a man smells like Windex.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:30

What does Windex even smell like? Chemical, I presume. It smells like blue. I think.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:37

Like blue Gatorade. That's all I got. It just just just blue. It just smells like blue. Yeah, I I I'll agree. Again, I'm it's not one that I'm like. Again, Corey Feldman, cool. I don't know. Uh child actors always do a weird thing for me, but it's not bad. I like it here. It talking is very hard tonight. I'm so sorry. I literally feel like the most blonde I've ever felt in my life.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:03

Don't say that.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:05

He's like, he found that surprising. She's like, you know, it's just better for everybody because she's so kind-hearted.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:11

I know. And then some D bag at the whatever pharmacy store. Were they at a pharmacy?

SPEAKER_03 1:04:16

They were at a video store.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:18

A video store. Even better. He was probably behind the beaded curtain right before she got there.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:21

Oh god.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:22

This is the time of beaded curtains.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:24

I mean, they show exactly what he was doing right before she got there.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:27

You know, I'm just saying, you know, before that, whatever. Wow.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:31

Got some great contributions. Yeah. Shy about star.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:34

Earlier, my f the part that I was gonna say, that's what I was looking for. I was gonna say the worst part is that friggin' shirtless dancing that was done at the beginning of the movie. Yeah. Disgusting. And Jane was like, it's a slash because of that. Um everyone in the 80s listen.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:51

Sex scene? I mean.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:52

No, I didn't hate the sex scene. You know, a little fantasy in my sex scene. I can take it.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:56

Oh, I have the worst part for you.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:58

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:58

The vampire toe is clinging onto the ceiling.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:02

No, it's it's it's vampire, you know? It's the little it's the little vats.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:07

You're trying to help you out. I'm not against that.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:10

Um I mean, I can just go for it. What's the name of the shirtless man dancing at the beginning? R rolling his little thick belly around. He's like 40 years old.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:18

Uh sexy saxophone dude? Yeah. Whatever his name is, just call him.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:21

We'll just call him sexy saxophone dude.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:23

Um I feel like I'm sad that her um her little brother was a freaking turned into a vampire, but was that her brother or just some random kid? I understood it as her brother.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:36

Nah, she treats him like a little brother, but he's just a kid. Even worse.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:41

There you go. Yeah, there we go. Oh god, that's even worse, gif. That's the worst than the one that was here earlier. Okay, cool, let's go for it.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:50

And your favorite, he was very oiled up, very sweaty.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:53

Oh, yeah. So oily. And like, is he as oily as your ovaries? He was more oily than my ovaries. That's for sure.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:03

Ashley, that is exactly right. Netflix and chill. Not wrong. Right. But has no chill. I'm just saying. Why are y'all trying to make me so sexual? You're making yourself that sexual, babes.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:13

No, I just I never said Michael was sexy. I said he's hot.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:16

Yeah, you said you like Michael's everything.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:18

Those are two different things. That's true.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:21

Whatever.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:22

I'm a fan. Billion Chinese people be wrong. That was my opening quote. Oh, god dang it. Truly, the number of brain cells I have left today.