404: Near Dark (1987)

SPEAKER_05 0:04

But also he's kind of like the Renez man of this movie. Oh boy. It is and salutations and welcome to Hacker Slash. If you're joining us again, welcome back. It almost feels like you're one of us now. If this is your first time listening, welcome to the party. We are a horror movie review podcast dedicated to telling you whether a movie is a hack, a total joke, a waste of time, or a splash. Totally killer unintended. We believe horror is for everyone, and as such, we're writing these movies with the perspective we've gained from our varying walks of life and the flavors of fear we fancy most. My name is Chris, I'm your friendly neighborhood slasher enthusiast. This week I'm joined by the classic horror connoisseur Sean.

SPEAKER_01 0:46

It's finger looking good.

SPEAKER_05 0:48

And the paranormal paramore Big. Boy, you people sure stay up late. This week we're strapping on our spurs and heading out west for an 80s vampire flick.

SPEAKER_01 0:58

And if you support the show, you'll also get to hear our B-side at the end of this episode where we talk about all the dumb shit vampires would do in 2025.

SPEAKER_05 1:06

More than 20 years before director Catherine Bigelow won Academy Awards, she set out to make a Western. But with little interest from financers, she and screenwriter Eric Redd decided to fuse their idea with something more in demand. In 1987, they brought something different to the vampire renaissance of the 1980s. Not fangs or castles, but backroads, bar fights, and the dust of the American frontier. They reimagined the American vampire myth through a gritty lens by drawing from genre influences like biker films and outlaw stories. What emerged was a film that pulled actors fresh off of aliens, merged noir with westerns, and explored the blurred lines of familiarity and monstrosity. The story follows a young man who crosses paths with a woman on the edge of town, only to find himself caught in the orbit of her brutal nomadic family. And what unfolds is a collision of Western grit and vampire lore wrapped in themes of identity, survival, and blood ties that stretch beyond the biological. Despite critical praise and occult following, a remake was scrapped in the late 2000s, thanks in part to Twilight for cornering the market on human vampire romance. While there isn't a remake in sight yet, it's time we turn to the past, because this week we're talking about Near Dark. Who's seen this one before?

SPEAKER_01 2:21

I could tell you I remember my reaction to seeing this pop up in the lineup because I remember watching this movie as a kid a long ass time ago, but I haven't seen this in probably 20 years, easily. Maybe even more. I'm not even sure. I have a faint memory of watching this movie, so I'm so excited to see how this one goes.

SPEAKER_03 2:43

Listen, selfishly, I just had been lighting a candle, praying that we would do this because I've been dying to see this movie, never seen it, definitely heard of it. And I mean, I guess in fairness, that's okay to say because it seems like this movie is so fucking hard to find, to watch anywhere. It's almost near impossible to do so.

SPEAKER_05 3:05

Yeah, I hadn't actually heard of this movie before. This movie came into the lineup because Binks and I were trying to look at our spooky preseason and spooky season, and we're just flushing some things out. And I genuinely took a book of horror movies that I have off my shelf, opened to a random page, and there was near dark. Now, looking at what the premise was, Vampires, Bill Paxton, I expected it to be really good. I didn't know what to expect when I saw the word western thrown out in there. But you know, I could get down with Western sometimes. Butch Cassidy, the Sundance Kid, Zorro, you know, I'm into it.

SPEAKER_01 3:40

All those. Yeah, yeah. I mean, listen, this is one of those cult cult classic horror movies that I think, you know, a lot of horror fans are really into. This is like a very liked movie, but it's definitely still feels like this underground film that a lot of people haven't heard of. This is a movie that was part of a new wave of modern vampire films. It's obviously we had Fright Night a couple years before this one, but The Lost Boys came during this very same summer. And so this is very much an early take on this modern resurgence of vampires at this time. So I was expecting this one to feel kind of nostalgic, but not in a way that you know the things within the movie are nostalgic. I was just thinking maybe watching the film would bring back memories of watching the film, you know what I mean? That would be nostalgic and just bring me back to all the times that I was watching this movie, maybe maybe The Lost Boys, I think I remember the most, Fright Night, of course. So I don't know. I was just expecting a really fun vampire film filled with nostalgia, but not because of the movie, but because of maybe just it would bring memories back.

SPEAKER_03 4:54

That's fair. I think when we had done that little book thing, Chris, I didn't even realize that it was a Western until you had said that part. I think I had just heard that this movie was a cult classic, like you said, and it's just that it's vampires. Really, it's the cover. I think that's what stood the test of time for me, and knowing that Bill Paxton's in it. I expected this to be really gory, almost like the intensity, the gore, the grit of a vampire film in the 80s. So I hear you when you say Lost Boys, because I guess it at the time, obviously, after watching this movie, I can see the connection. But at the time when I had heard it, and then even when we selected the movie, I was like, I didn't really put two and two together that it could even be like that. Then when I heard Western, I was like, damn, is this still gonna be gory? I just don't see that in Western films. Then again, I don't consume that genre specifically very often. But here's what I will say Catherine Bigelow. I don't know what it is about this woman, but I feel like I've got like five fun facts always stacked. One of them is that I share a birthday with Keanu Reeves. But the second one that I always tend to tell people is that Catherine Bigelow was married to James Cameron. Okay. And they got divorced in I think it was like 1999, late 90s. But the point is that she's the first female director to have ever won an Oscar. And that year in particular, she won against James Cameron for Avatar. So that was a win for women everywhere, in more ways than one.

SPEAKER_02 6:25

Oh, I love that.

SPEAKER_03 6:26

I'll have to say I expected greatness because obviously that win alone was like, goddamn, she did it. So I don't know, I feel like there's gotta be a reason, right? The filmography speaks for itself, maybe.

SPEAKER_05 6:36

Yeah, honestly, truly iconic on her part. Listen, I went into near dark hoping to be totally invested, but I found myself checking out pretty early on. And I think it's because the pacing in the first half really just dragged for me, and I didn't feel fully engaged until much later in the movie. And I feel bad saying that. But experiencing this movie, it reminded me of a couple different things, right? It reminded me of Twilight, it reminded me of Lost Boys, and then it also reminded me of A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night. Because that's again another vampiric western style. It was an interesting one that we did way back in the day. But despite how much I felt like this movie dragged, the performances, especially from Bill Paxton, helped keep it from being a total watch. And I never really hated what I was watching, but I definitely just didn't love it the way I expected to.

SPEAKER_01 7:32

Man, I honestly I don't know how you cannot have a good time anytime that Bill Paxton is on screen, because Bill Paxton as Severin was pure fucking gold in this movie. Let's face it.

SPEAKER_05 7:44

Yeah, he was, but let's also be very clear that it goes a while before you even see him, and that shouldn't drag.

SPEAKER_01 7:50

That's true. That is true. It did, it was kind of slow to build up to the Paxton of it all. But this is also aside from that, this is also a very dirty, dusty film. You know what I mean? You can feel the sweat in this film, you can feel the blood and all of that cigarette smoke that's floating around in this movie, but there's also this haunting melancholy about this film. There are those undertones that kind of seep through. And I think this movie is also kind of like dripping with sadness and longing. There's depth to the story here if you're actually, you know, watching this like story unfold. And I feel like you can feel the tragedy of immortality in this movie. I feel like, especially in May, which we can elaborate on a bit more when we get into characters, obviously in the spoiler zone. But there were there was a lot of stuff hidden beneath the surface of this film.

SPEAKER_03 8:47

Yeah, and a lot of it might have been grime, I think. I don't know. It's like you look at this movie and you can tell that they've got dirt underneath their nails for sure. But I guess that's effective, right? I feel like that's the point. I expected the grit, the gore, maybe not so much the gore when I ended up, you know, start watching the film, experiencing it. There's some, but it wasn't that. However, I still got like this dirt ambiance like it would be in a western. So I'll give it to them on that front. I think that expectation was met, most definitely. Yeah. But I agree with you, Chris. I think it's a slow burn. But maybe I'm in a new season of life where I felt like even though it was a slow burn, I wasn't fully disengaged. I was a little curious. I was wanting more Bill Paxton, but I think that's fair when everyone knows this movie, probably because of him. And he's just so enigmatic, you know, incredible actor. But I bought into the romance. I thought it was like the chemistry was there. I thought it was really good. And when it gets going, it gets going. And I think overall, like the atmosphere and how vampires work in this world is what kept me wanting to see what happens, what's gonna happen next, etc. And like one particular mechanic of vampire lore, how does it actually happen in this per in this world of near dark?

SPEAKER_05 10:08

That's a really interesting take that you got there, especially when you say about how it gets going. Because when this movie gets tough, is that right there is a moment that this movie gets going. And I will also say that one thing that really surprised me was how different this movie felt compared to other vampire stories. We talked about the Lost Boys earlier, we talked about Twilight, sure. Those really portray vampires as like seductive creatures. And you think about immortality and the lure of immortality, but this movie walks in a different direction because it's not flashy, it's not seductive. It leans into that dirty, gritty, grimy realism. So many people say that movies have texture. This is a movie that has texture, and also I don't know why I'm being struck by the reminder of Five Ul Goes West. I feel like tumbleweeds should be going in this movie, you know? Sure, sure. But the really cool thing here is that these vampires aren't charming immortals, they're like these drifters on the fringe of society, and I just didn't see that part coming. I appreciated that fresh take, but the biggest disappointment for me again was just how slow it moved. It felt like it took forever to get going. And when we got the vampires, then um, okay, all right, let's see how this is gonna play out here. It is very much that parallel of the Lost Boy. So depending on which movie you saw first, maybe you'd have a preference either way, but this was an experience to say the least.

SPEAKER_01 11:40

100% for sure. And I think it's interesting because you know, if you haven't watched this movie, if you haven't heard about it, or if you're like me and haven't watched it in over 20 years and don't read anything about it, you're just super hyped to watch something that you vaguely remember, and you just go in and watch it. You know, we've talked about at the beginning of this episode, both of these points actually, but it's definitely surprising when you do get hit with the Western side of it all, right? Because it's not often that you get that Western horror genre blending thing, right? It definitely blends the two genres together. And when we think of movies that do this, this is definitely one of the few early ones that really modernized it before movies like From Dusk Till Dawn and things like that. But you might be surprised to find that it this is not the first of its kind, folks. I mean, you're talking to the classic horror connoisseur here, so I would be remiss if I not if I were not to tell you that one of, if not the earliest known Western horror film is actually Curse of the Undead from 1959. It's a Western vampire gunslinger tale, and everyone should watch that one at least once. So put that on your list. Really fun movie. But this is, you know, we're not here to talk about that. I just want to let you know that this was not the pioneer right here that we're talking about. Near Dark was not the pioneer.

SPEAKER_05 13:00

Maybe we should have been talking about that, Sean. We should have spiked that shit into the lineup. Why not?

SPEAKER_01 13:05

Yeah, I'm sure we'll get it, we'll get it in the lineup one of these days for sure.

SPEAKER_05 13:09

Yeah. Here I am opening a random page in a book, and Sean's like, well, if I turn to the archives of my memory, I have this, the first Western vampire gunslinger. What the fuck, Sean?

SPEAKER_01 13:18

If I knew that's what we were going for, you know.

SPEAKER_05 13:21

Yeah, I mean, I can't say that Binks and I really sat down and said, fuck it, we want cowboy vampires. But now that I know that this is what we can ask for from you, we know the old liver.

SPEAKER_01 13:32

Yeah, for sure. But it's not even that. It's not even just that that I think is surprising. I think you mentioned earlier, like this was around the time that we got Aliens 1986, right? And I think it's funny. And then Binks, you're talking about James Cameron being involved with Catherine Bigelow. And you might see a fair amount of actors in here that were also in Aliens 1986, and that's because future husband of Catherine Bigelow at this time, James Cameron, suggested using some of his cast, which was indeed used. So you can see you can see a lot of those actors that you saw in Aliens. You can even see a theater showing aliens in the background of this movie at some point. So they were really like plugging in the movie within this movie, so that was kind of interesting. But aside from those two facts, let me tell you something. You know what the most surprising thing is in this movie? Maybe disappointing to some. Maybe the word vampire is never used in this movie, and there are no fangs featured in this movie. You will not see any fangs in this movie. That's not a spoiler because vampires are in this movie. But let me tell you, they don't, Rick, they do not acknowledge the term vampire and they do not show any fangs in this movie. So I thought that was very interesting and very surprising for a vampire film, and it really sets it apart from the rest of the films that were coming out around this time.

SPEAKER_03 14:53

Wow. But you know what's funny is I was gonna talk about how I don't know if it's necessarily a disappointment. It's more of a surprise, a little bit of a disappointment. I was gonna talk about how the film kind of walks you through this experience of coming, you know, around this group of vampires, right, etc. There are vampires in this world, sure. But the way that the vampires are described, the way that they act, the way that they look, you said it earlier, Chris. They're not the stereotypical vampires that we see in media. They're not sexy, alluring. They very much look like you and me. Well, I could be sexy and alluring, but you know what I mean? Like it's it's just like they look very normal. And you say that they don't have fangs and all of this. And I'm like, yeah, I guess that's kind of it, right? Like they are very good at looking very normal, surface level. You would never suspect, aside from maybe just their debauchery, sure. But then I can't help but feel like, so then what's the appeal? You know, that's a maybe the slight twinge of disappointment where it's like, why would I want to be one then in a way? If you are very much common or look common, I suppose, or don't really have that much of a I guess like an attraction, an allure, superpowers. I don't know if we even want to call it that, you know?

SPEAKER_05 16:16

It didn't seem like any of these people were doing it because they wanted to necessarily do it. Like they just, you know, they got nipped, they got bit, and so it's almost like you fall into this crowd of people, and all of a sudden the peer pressure gets you, you know? And really the peer pressure, that is the real scary shit in this movie. Say no to drugs, folks. Say no to peer pressure, say no to people trying to control you or do any other manner of thing. You don't deserve that. But apart from that, I wouldn't say this movie is even in the least bit scary. I think it can be unsettling in some ways, in a very like, be careful who you go into a bar with kind of way. But I I think where this movie also kind of falls is that the horror takes a back seat to other genre elements. It blends that in western, that noir, those tones in this way that it really like mutes the intensity of the vampires, it mutes the intensity of the horror. And while there could be a few disturbing moments, if you're coming in looking for a good scare, this is not the one that's gonna do it for you. It's gonna have you hoot and hollering in different ways, or feel like a very adult vampire story, but nothing that's going to give you like a big spook.

SPEAKER_03 17:32

I agree. No big spook here at all. I think that, like I said earlier, I was even expecting a lot of gore and blood, and sure there is that, but it's nothing that I think would make you cringe to an extreme. Like, I think you'll be just fine, even if you are someone who doesn't consume horror that much. It's just not really that's scary. And I don't even really think that I was intimidated too much by everyone, except for potentially Bill Paxton at times, but he also kind of looked just cool, right? You know? So that one's also a tough one. Again, the lost boys of it all, because I also feel that way about the vampires in that film. But there isn't too much intimidation either. So I would not be concerned about watching this movie. And you know what I will say the caveat is is that put maybe if I had seen this film in a different format, maybe I would have felt a little bit slightly differently about some of the scenes that are like more dimly lit, etc. But yeah, you'll be fine. If you don't like scary movies or you're very like, you know, scaredy cat, you'll be okay, I promise.

SPEAKER_05 18:38

I want to generate a petition. Not that there's anything wrong with key for telling, but let's have Bill Paxton as one of the vampires in the Lost Boys. I think that's the movie everybody needed.

SPEAKER_01 18:49

Man, I mean, I'm here for that 100%. No offense. No offense, but I am here for that for sure. I agree. I think this it's not like there's not a lot of traditional fright factor in this one. Let's just be honest. And it is to your point, Chris. They're blending two genres, so are they leaning heavier into the Western at times? Is it taken away from the horror of it all? There are no jump scares, there's no, you know, monsters jumping out at you per se, although we have vampires, obviously. There's no creepy ghosts, there's no haunted tropes, right? You're not getting that kind of thing from this movie. It is a dark movie, it is a like a dirty movie, right? You feel like the dirtiness of this movie, but what this movie does have going for it, I think, is the unpredictability of the vampires. I think the atmosphere does make this movie a little bit, I would say maybe creepy, not scary. It does have that vibe to it. But because it's blending those two genres, you know, it maybe takes away from the scare factor. But I think it did do a really good job at blending those two genres together. I really, really do, because you have all of the tropes of a classic Western movie with a group of bandits moving from town to town and fucking shit up, right? Like that's what you're here for in a western, and you get that in this movie. And then you get that perfect blend of just enough horror mixed in there with the whole vampire theme. It's not over the top, and I feel like it's not the it's not the formula, because the formula is, I feel like, yeah, it's not that the formula is unfamiliar, right? Like the formula is something that you can probably you've seen before, but it's the way that they tell the story, it feels fresh, especially for its time, right? We're talking about 1987. It's that blend of genres and its ability to stand out in a decade that's saturated with flashy vampire flicks. So if you can do that, I think it got some originality points for sure. I think it stands out a little bit, but the idea of blood transfusion and things like that, which we can elaborate later in the movie, like that did not come from this movie. That came from Bram Stoker. That came straight out of the book of Dracula.

SPEAKER_03 21:02

And that's on period. Just kidding. Well, not really, because you're right. Quite literally, you're right. Yeah, there's lots of particularities that, of course, come from text, but I think, like we've said already, I'm gonna give my girl some props because although I did not know that this is not a pioneer for vampire western films, it is in my world and my truth and my reality. So maybe for my generation, this is what we're thinking of at default, right? So I think that it's incredible to blend this genre. I think that at the very least, the approach of the vampires, like I said, it's not so much a disappointment as much as it is a surprise and a question mark that I kind of like because at the very least, although this is not a movie that's supposed to facilitate deep thought, I I did question. I was like, why would you really want to be one? And to your point, Chris, you're right. I hadn't considered it. It's like, I don't think anybody really does. Why? Because you're right. Why would you? You kind of Just fall upon it. You become a victim of it. And you get scared about not being it if you've been it for so long, right? So I think that's really cool because if I really were to spiral, I'd probably think, like, damn, are there people that are vampires walking around me right now?

SPEAKER_05 22:18

You got energy vampires all around you. I love what we do in the shadows. And the other thing is that these are the kind of vampires that you fucking end up cursed to live eternity with. If you're a people pleaser and you can't say no to anybody, if you can't set boundaries, these are the vampires that you're stuck with.

SPEAKER_03 22:36

My nightmare. Because yeah.

SPEAKER_05 22:39

Yeah, it's tough. But listen, I I do think near dark brings something unique to the vampire table. Sean, it's interesting to know that there are movies that predate this that maybe even go a different direction. But what I can appreciate here is the way it strips away glamour and turns characters and like these vampires into outcasts. That is interesting to me. We've seen glimpses of it in some other movies and some other vampire franchises, but we've almost seen it like they remove themselves. And you know, I'm sure these did as well. But these people in particular, and it's interesting that I even say myself, like I'm catching myself saying that they're people, but these are people who feel more like blood-addicted junkies than classic horror villains. Like this doesn't feel like Dracula. This doesn't feel like Fright Knight. I'm really running into some trouble here.

SPEAKER_03 23:31

I see it. I see it. Interesting. Damn.

SPEAKER_05 23:35

Yeah, it's something. It's something. But hey, that's neither here nor there. Let's go ahead and start making our way towards our ratings for this one. Now before we actually score it. Sean, how would you describe the gore score for this vampire flick?

SPEAKER_01 23:47

I mean, this is not over-the-top gore, but when the violence erupts in this movie, it's brutal, it's chaotic. I think it's not overly gory by today's standards, but the way the vampires kill, it's up close and personal, it's a little bit sadistic. And it's not just blood and guts that make the gore in this movie. It's also the effects of how the vampires suffer in the sun, the smoking, the blistering, the catching on fire. It's slow, it's painful. And all of this adds to the gore in this movie. But I think overall, when you mix all that together, it's still earning itself a solid medium gore score.

SPEAKER_03 24:26

And what about the animal report? We are completely safe, with the exception of a mosquito, but I'm not sure that really counts.

SPEAKER_05 24:33

Well, let's go ahead and get into our ratings then. Near dark from 1987. Was it a hack or a slash? I think I just want to rip the band-aid off here for this Western. This movie has a lot going for it. The performances are solid, it's super well directed. We all know that. There's a lot of gritty originality to how it reimagines vampire lore for sure. But I can't ignore the fact that I spent most of the runtime feeling disengaged. And I kept waiting to be pulled in. I kept waiting to be seduced by these vampires. And it didn't really happen until well past the halfway mark. And emotionally it didn't connect with me in the way that I hoped it would. If we were on our Western spin-off, Yeehaw or Naw, bro, this would land super on the scale of naw. Thanks. Don't look so sad about it. But I have to respect how much this brings to the vampire conversation. And I'm glad I watched it. It's an important piece of vampire cinema, especially when you're looking at how the genre evolved in the 1980s. I think where I land on this is it's important, but not my cup of tea. I give Near Dark a very light slash because it's a slash in the sense that I respect it and I appreciate its place in the genre, but it's not something I'm gonna be reaching for again when I want a great vampire movie.

SPEAKER_03 25:56

I just want to say that my reaction was mostly because you said our spin-off show, Yeehaw or Na, and that has to be a highlight of the year.

SPEAKER_05 26:07

I 100% agree that's why you're reacting that way.

SPEAKER_03 26:10

We need to now do a spin-off called Yeehaw or Na. It's brilliant. It's fucking brilliant. It's just incredible. Listeners, let us know if you really want the Yeehaw or Na, because at this point I will actually start watching Western films. That was too good. I listen, I I feel you, Chris, because I think that if this caught me in any other particular mood, I wouldn't have been as passive and like okay with the pacing of this film. I think that because I was actually really bought into the chemistry of our two main leads, that I was like, okay, I just kind of want to see where this goes with them. I actually really liked Caleb, who's our main actor. Well, I love the actor from Heroes, that's aside, but like I love the character. And I was like, okay, let's see what happens here. I'm I'm very interested because a male lead that isn't so enticed or compelled or wanting to be a part of the vampire community for its attractions and glamour and glitz is it's interesting and it's something that we don't really see very often. I think that what we see like in terms of vampires in present-day media, it lends itself to like this male toxicity and all of all of these like tropes for men in media. So it's like, okay, we're actually seeing something that's very different than that. It's the antithesis of that. So I loved it, right? And I thought, like, okay, that's enough to buy me in. I liked that the vampires just weren't like most vampires that I've like read or or seen in TV, with the exception of a couple things, sure. But I don't know. I think that it was like entertaining enough. I thought that it was okay. And although I watched it in a particular platform, we can say, that didn't really lend itself to like make the film look the prettiest, or uh let's say like really pump up the production value. I do know that that's because it's just a really fucking hard movie to watch anywhere. So if I owned this on DVD, I'd probably love how it looked even more visually and would have been more bought in. So I'm not gonna like downplay or rather I'm not gonna like give it negative points for that. Instead, I'm gonna give it a slash. Maybe in another time I would have felt a little bit of a stronger slash for this, like most people do about this movie. But for right now, it's still a slash. It crosses over the line. I had a good time with it. It's not like the best thing I've ever seen, but it was it was fun. It was okay.

SPEAKER_01 28:39

Man, I feel like this movie is just getting by. You know what I mean? Just slipping by on this slash train here. But let me tell you, Near Dark isn't your average vampire flick. I feel like it trades fangs for dust and diesel. It's an absolute cult classic. This is one that I know a lot of horror fans really cherish, and yet a lot of people also haven't heard of it at the same time. It's a very interesting film. The way that the way that Catherine Bigelow blends the Western and horror genres into something lean, mean, deeply tragic. I feel like it's not over the top, but when the violence hits, it hits hard. The romance bleeds tragedy. The vampires are more like backwoods predators than gothic aristocrats, right? They're not like these like really cunning vampires. They're to your point, Chris, earlier, they're just these people that are like drifters that are kind of shady characters, you know what I mean? And Bill Paxton absolutely steals the show as Severin, the bloodthirsty lunatic with a ton of swagger. Much like the violence, there isn't a ton of gore, but when there is, you definitely feel it. There's something about the way that the sunlight sizzles, it's not the easiest movie to find, to your point, Binks, but it is a hidden gem. And I think there is a lot to enjoy in this movie. And I feel like this vampire western, it does burn slow, but it bites hard and it really sinks its spurs into you. So for me, it's a throat slicing slash.

SPEAKER_05 30:18

I just want to point out that this movie is also another great candidate for He Did It All for the Nookie.

SPEAKER_02 30:23

Quite literally.

SPEAKER_05 30:24

Mm-hmm. And with that, Near Dark has earned a universal slash. If you've seen it, let us know how you'd rate it. Join the conversation for free in our Discord server. If you haven't, good luck finding it. We'll try to link a few places here in the episode description. But stick around because after the break, we're gonna enter the spoiler zone. We're gonna talk about the unforgettable massacre, the film's take on vampire mythology, and whether this outlaw family dynamic actually delivers. We'll see you in a bit.

SPEAKER_00 30:58

Well, howdy there, partner! This week's episode of Hackerslash is brought to you by The Blood Shot, the only dive bar where the beer is warm, the patrons are cold, and the windows are always blacked out. Nestled somewhere between a dust bowl and damn nation, the bloodshot is your late-night pit stop for hellraisers, hitchhikers, and god knows what else. So whether you're fresh off a highway massacre, or just trying to unwind after a long night of nekin, we've got something on tap that'll make your fangs tingle. I'd into a sticky booth. Let's severin DJ from the jukebox and enjoy our house special, the old negative old fashion. It's smoky, it's bloody, and legally questioned. And don't worry about barfights, they're encouraged, because at the blood shop, we don't judge, we don't car, and we definitely don't do daylight. The blood shop. Well, last call is just before sunrise, if you make it that way.

SPEAKER_05 32:32

Now we have a lot to unpack here, but before we get into the wild, wild west of this movie, let's go through those kills.

SPEAKER_01 32:39

Well, there's a solid 12 on-screen kills in this movie. That's pretty good. That's pretty good. Even more if you think of all the implied kills and that mention of 300 some odd people that were killed in the Great Chicago fire that was somehow started by Jesse and Severin back in 1971. I guess they're taking credit for that one. But we aren't counting that off-screen shit tonight because we're talking about the 12 that we do see on screen. And I can't wait to talk about them. So I gotta ask, which one of these kills gave you a taste for blood?

SPEAKER_03 33:14

Well, drum roll. Let's see if Chris and I have the same favorite kill. Would you like to go ahead?

SPEAKER_05 33:21

Kill? Of course it was. Go ahead. Wow. Listen, Homer, what a little punk.

SPEAKER_01 33:27

Back on track.

SPEAKER_05 33:29

The fact that this kid was about to pick up this man's little sister. Although, who am I to talk? Because it's it is Edward and Bella, just with a difference in the age, right? And they're like seven instead of fucking 17. I was so glad to see that with his like almost like this youthful mindset where you think you're just invincible. What happens when someone who's near invincible also thinks they're invincible? He gets out of the car and then combusts and then just explodes. Hell yeah. Love that. So glad he got it.

SPEAKER_03 34:05

Absolutely. I think it was also my favorite kill because again, I watched this on a format that wasn't necessarily the greatest. However, that being said, that scene in particular was probably one of the coolest and prettiest things I've seen in a bit. So yeah, my feelings aside about homework is fuck that kid. That was like a really beautiful kill.

SPEAKER_01 34:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 34:29

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01 34:30

I mean, it is. I feel like the fact that he was chasing little Sarah right into the sunlight, the slow, painful death as he slowly burns and he bursts into flames. I mean, it's tragically showing that he may be this child in appearance, but he is ancient and fucking bitter inside. And his rage and desperation, I feel like, make it clear that he would rather fucking burn than be denied control and take this fucking girl for himself.

SPEAKER_05 34:58

Yeah. Nah. No thanks, bro. So glad you expired.

SPEAKER_03 35:02

Definitely.

SPEAKER_01 35:02

Oh man.

SPEAKER_03 35:03

Uh second pick, I suppose, would be the bartender when he just like gets that boot right in the throat. That was a doozy. But that you know what it is actually, let's be honest, is like all the kills by Severin were like real hot, you know? Maybe that's it.

SPEAKER_05 35:21

Yeah. Listen, that bar massacre was so great. Minus one. And it's not even that the kill itself was bad, but I just want to get there in a second. But that whole sequence, right? It's full of tension, it's full of style, it brought energy. This was the point in the movie where I was like, okay, we're starting to get somewhere, and I'm kind of into the direction that we're going. But the part that really just like fucked me up, we had the waitress kill. Yeah. And there wasn't enough of a reaction to the fact that she just got her fucking throat slit and her blood poured into a glass. Like, I know that these guys in this bar have seen some shit, but there just wasn't enough of a reaction. And then you've got Jesse delivering this iconic line. I'm sorry. If I was in a bar trapped with Jesse, who in my mind is another alternate universe version of Jasper, if Jasper had chosen a different life instead of the one he found with Alice in Twilight, he would have ended up being Jesse because they both fought for the South. He says just a couple minutes of your time, about the same duration as the rest of your life, and then everything goes completely off the fucking rails. Holy shit, what a scene.

SPEAKER_01 36:34

It is a really great scene. The whole bar massacre scene, that whole ensemble of kills was really great. And you know, the kills in this movie, they're not really about that flashy horror spectacle, right? Like they're brutal, they're personal. It's no, it's not even so much the act of killing, but how these vampires kill that I feel like leaves a lasting impression on you. Because obviously the bar massacre as a whole was great for kills in this movie, from the throat being cut with a spur to the waitress getting killed with the throat slashing and like drained her blood into that cup for them to share. The whole thing was tense, it was sadistic, it's also darkly theatrical. It did a number for the kills in this movie. But also, I want to highlight Severin's death as well, because you know, much like Homer not wanting to fucking like give up what he really wanted and was willing to die for it, Severin was just like fuck you to the end. Like he was literally on fire. The fucking truck blows up, he's crawling out of the flames like he's still gonna fucking do something before he fucking blows up. So like at least that guy went out like a G.

SPEAKER_05 37:44

He fucking did something, and actually, I I want to zero in on something here because you're mentioning this fire, you're mentioning the explosion, and I really just want to give it out for one of the things that stood out really significantly to me in this movie, and that was the practical effects. That was also specifically just like how we got into the fire. Sean, you mentioned earlier about how this movie sizzles. Man, if ever there was a movie to have a sizzle reel, it would be this one specifically, because we get the daylight scenes that we see their skin just like crispy. It is crispy and crunchy. It feels like I have burned things in an oven. And just to see how they're fucking impacted by the sun, usually we get something that's like more of like a red burn or like a sizzle or just like immediate flames, I feel super dramatic. But we get a while, even where Caleb is just smoking underneath a jacket, and I just loved that amount of impact or like the interaction with daylight, especially in one specific scene. And it's not my favorite scene, and we'll get there in a bit, but when we have like this shootout, this classic Western shootout, and then we have bullet holes going everywhere, and now the vampires are in there having to evade little rays of sunlight, uh, it's just too good.

SPEAKER_03 39:10

Yeah, I actually was gonna highlight that too, in terms of like my favorite production element and visual aspect of this film is the like set design and the practical effects and the makeup department, like the whole freaking team I think did great. And that's where it's like, damn, seeing a remastered version of this film or like on a 4K or something would be incredible because the fire is captured so beautifully that I wish I had seen it clearer, you know, that I just wish that I could have, because it's almost like I really could have felt that heat for sure. And then as far as the people goes, it's like we've been joking, it's like, man, you can tell that they need like several fucking baths. They're just grimy. And so, sure, maybe I didn't get quite the gore that I thought I was gonna get from this movie, but I definitely got the dirt and I definitely got the Western like heat and grime and uncomfortableness, right? Like where I felt like I needed to shower. And again, I certainly would have felt even more that way if I had seen a clearer picture and cut of this film, but it's incredible the stuff that they did for this time as well. Like the costume design, too. Everything is like tattered and and even his outfit from the very beginning. He said the smoking underneath. At the time, I of course, I don't know why I didn't even fucking think of this. It's like it's called near dark, and I didn't think that they were going to lean so heavily in the whole sun aspect of it, because quite honestly, that's not really like the biggest thing when it comes to vampire films. Like it's always just at night. You know what I mean? Like we always just see them at night and we never really see them impacted by the sun. I think like we see some of that in more modern day, like right now, like sinners, like that film, right? But it's like in this particular aspect, do you feel a lot of the daylight in a vampire film where we're so used to only experiencing them at night? So I thought that that was like a really good cinematography choice as well.

SPEAKER_01 41:07

Yeah, it's always there, right? Like the whole like can't be in the daylight thing is always there, but it's not always the thing that they're worried about, right? We're used to seeing like, you know, wooden stakes or crosses and those usual tropes, and they really kind of turn that upside down in this movie because you can even see on one of I think it's Jesse's guns, has a cross on the handle, and he's just gunslinging that shit. So, like, you know what I mean? Like, it really kind of shows you that none of that typical stuff is really where it's at. It's really the sunlight that they're worried about. And this movie has a lot going on visually for sure. There is that grittiness due to how dusty and dirty this movie really does feel. But I have to take a moment to recognize the overall score and the choice of even just the licensed songs to throw in there because the soundtrack for Near Dark was composed by Tangerine Dream, a German electronic music group, the same group that brought you the scores for Risky Business, Firestarter, mind you. But the score it plays such a crucial role in setting this film's moody, dreamy, eerie tone. But man, it's not even just the score. The licensed music that they added in here was very, very thoughtful too, because songs like Fever by the Kramps help to really add a specific energy, almost grounding the vampires in this world that feels grungy and lawless and real, which really leads me to one of my favorite scenes. And I know we've already been talking about it, and it's probably somebody else's favorite scene. So I'm I maybe it's not, but I'm not gonna get into all the details. I'll let someone else share maybe what they loved about this scene. But when we go back to that bar scene, the bar massacre scene, I gotta highlight it because in this bar massacre scene, it uses music almost as a weapon. It's mixing Severin's completely unhinged energy with the cramp's sleazy, rebellious vibe, and it was a perfect mix to really bring you that everything that you needed to feel in this scene. It was just a really great pairing, and that's what this soundtrack does.

SPEAKER_05 43:24

100%, Sean. I also want to shout out the score, specifically in the opening of this film. There's like this really rhythmic, pulsing guitar in that opening scene, and it hypnotizes you. It immediately sets that tone for something a little offbeat, a little bit weird. And yeah, you absolutely nailed it. The bar scene is one of the best scenes in this movie, not just for the kills, but for the vibe. I hadn't even considered and appreciated the music of it all. It was just the energy and the chaos that really got to me because it's tense, it's gritty, it feels Finally, like the movie was fully leaning into its horror side, and it was like this perfect little microcosm of what this movie does well, which is being raw, stylish, and brutal. And I actually yeah, aside from that, I even just want to highlight one of the quieter moments. There's a scene where May and Caleb are looking up at the stars, and she gives this little monologue about the light from the stars taking a billion years to reach Earth. And it was just this brief exchange because it was the closest I got to feeling like okay, I could get into this. She says, You want to know why you've never met a girl like me before? And it's because she's gonna last, like when that fucking thing finally falls after billions of years, she's finally gonna be there. It felt like it was trying super hard to be haunting and poetic, but the execution, although it didn't land, the scene itself, like that romance, that innocence, that purity, but also impurity, it helped reinforce how far removed I think May felt from humanity, and it had this like ethereal texture to the relationship that I thought worked very well thematically.

SPEAKER_03 45:08

Both of you have like highlighted basically the scene I enjoyed the most from this movie. And I think ultimately what it comes down to is that I I feel like a lot of the film is at a really good spot and safe space where I can like grab a little bit of something from each moment for sure, whether it is a kill, obviously, or it isn't. I really enjoyed not just when Bill Paxton is on screen at any point in time, sure, but I think it is actually when we have Caleb and May, because I don't know what it is, really bought into their chemistry. And I thought they were so like opposite to each other. And it it was maybe the twilight of it all. I hate to say it, but maybe it was, you know. And I really felt like at least at the very end, you know, we've got her, you know, back. She's human again, you know, and she doesn't know what to do. And there's like this sense of fear, and in the safety that she's had is now gone because she's no longer a vampire. And what she knows, the people that she's been around are gone, you know. I can only imagine what that feels like. Because it's like when you said earlier when you're a people pleaser and you're like, well, I'm just gonna stick around with the people that I know and just keep doing the things that I know, and I'm afraid to deviate. But when you find someone that like makes you feel safe enough to kind of do that, and you just whether you've made that conscious choice for yourself or not, you f stumble upon it, you're now in a situation where you're no longer like latched onto those people. It's freeing to maybe the exterior, but it it's gonna take a while, I would imagine, in May's case, like for her to get there. So I think at the very end, when they're in the embrace and he's just like consoling her, and and there's that comfort. It feels like a nice conclusion to them in a way. I I I really liked that ending and that piece. I I thought that at the very least their character arc was like really like a little bow on on top. I thought it was sweet. Any moment with the two of them was very sweet, but in that whether it was like the bar scene or whatever, and I guess like that whole chaos would help unfold shortly thereafter. But at the very least, at the very end, I was like, dang, together forever.

SPEAKER_05 47:13

You know? Okay. I think my problem is they U-hauled, and I didn't believe their romance after one night. Motherfucker, I've been botted. I have never U-hauled in my life, so let's be clear. Don't point the finger at me because I'm the lesbian.

SPEAKER_01 47:28

It's something it was love at first bite, you know?

SPEAKER_05 47:31

Yeah, love at first bite, love at first nip, love at first sight. It's just nah. I wasn't buying them completely romantically. Like they had a very sweet moment, but the reason why I love that moment was because of like, okay, this is the excitement of meeting someone new that you're really into, and then there was a very cryptic line in here that points directly towards her immortality, and he's just unfazed. But I just I liked both of them. I think they were hot. I don't think they actually had chemistry.

SPEAKER_01 48:00

Yeah, it was an interesting dynamic for sure. But can I tell you another scene that I really enjoyed? And this one is a little more subtle, but it's the scene where Jesse is trying to check into the motel, and it's almost daylight. The sun is literally on the rise, and time is running out. And the motel clerk is going, he goes to give Jesse the keys to the room, and you can see that his hand is literally in the crosshairs of the sunlight, and somehow, you know, like Jesse has to go get those keys. So he has to cover his hand to grab it from him, and it's just such a great scene because I mean, and that's what this movie really is, right? It's just full of little subtleties like that, clever ways of depicting the fear of sunlight and shit like that. It was just a clever scene. I don't know if that stood out to anyone. It was just such a clever scene and a really nice, witty way to like kind of showcase the fear of the sunlight.

SPEAKER_05 49:02

The motel scene was super good overall. I especially love the chaos when Sarah opens the door, and then all of them are just getting crispy fried. But man, when I pull up the movie and I was looking up just images from the movie when I was like getting ready for the episode, before watching it, there's like this scene or like a still of Jesse in a car covered in a blanket, and I'm like, what is this crusty old dude? What could this possibly be? And now to finally know why that is, I'm like, oh, I get it.

SPEAKER_01 49:34

Also way out of context.

SPEAKER_05 49:36

Yeah, way out of context, way out of context. Also, them living van life with blacking out the van windows, they're living my dream. They're absolutely living my dream. Van line, van life.

SPEAKER_01 49:50

I mean, they really set the standard for van life, you know what I mean? Pioneers of van life.

SPEAKER_03 49:57

Truly. Honestly, if we thought of them in modern day and they were like on HGTV with one of those like really modern vans, like I'd be jelly. I think that they would have the time of their life, and it would be souped the fuck up for sure.

SPEAKER_01 50:13

So funny, so funny. But yeah, the van life is hilarious for sure. I gotta say though, even back to the sunlight, right? I really liked the way they use the daylight in this movie. I feel like it serves as the ultimate weapon, and the characters really help to prove that in the way that they're like deathly afraid of it. So like it's not just the that they can't stand it, right? Like, it's how they like desperately work to get to safety, and especially loved how like they use that RV as their moving coffin, Chris. Like, that was pretty dope, but like it's just like it's showcasing how they're like getting, you know, near dawn, not near dark, right? They literally, and that's probably what this movie should have fucking been called is near fucking dawn or until dawn, you know what I mean? Because the whole movie is about fucking escaping sunrise. But like yeah, but it's it's the RV, it's how they're or the car, whatever they're in. They're daylight's coming, they're blacking out the windows, or they're running across a field to beat the sunrise and all this crazy shit. It was such a cool way to kind of depict sunlight as not only a weapon, but as its own character in the movie, in a way, right? Like it was the antagonist to the antagonist.

SPEAKER_05 51:30

Sean, you're talking about daylight, and let me tell you what just popped into my brain. Sometimes when we're watching these movies and doing these episodes, I think, wow, this movie would be such a great music video for a specific song. This movie would work really well as a music video for daylight by Maroon 5.

SPEAKER_01 51:52

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_05 51:53

Because when the daylight comes, I'm gonna have to go. But tonight I'm gonna hold you so close.

SPEAKER_01 51:59

That song could have fit into this movie. It absolutely could have.

SPEAKER_05 52:03

Okay, I need to I need to do a cut. I'm gonna get I'm gonna go on YouTube, I'm gonna rip a scene pack, I'm gonna get that song. I'll see y'all on TikTok in a few days.

SPEAKER_01 52:12

And then what you do is you post it on YouTube advertising it as the full length of the movie, and then we go to play it, and then it's just a fucking mashup music video that Chris made, and he's she's just trolling us.

SPEAKER_05 52:25

Yeah, yeah. Then I get a copyright strike on YouTube from Maroon 5 and Adam Levine and this movie for sure.

SPEAKER_03 52:34

I can see it now. The biggest troll of 2025.

SPEAKER_05 52:38

You're gonna be a Rick Roll, but it's gonna be daylight.

SPEAKER_00 52:41

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_03 52:42

It's gonna be daylight, insanity.

SPEAKER_05 52:43

It's gonna be what's the exact runtime of this movie? I'm gonna loop that song with these clips that many times.

SPEAKER_01 52:50

Oh boy. Ridiculous, ridiculous.

SPEAKER_05 52:54

Yeah, but you know what else is ridiculous? Some of the uh characters in this movie. Listen, the performances they're strong across the board, but we talked about Severin. He's a clear standout, but he's also completely unhinged. He's still somehow like crazy in a way that feels grounded in that movie's like super grimy world. Like he has this unpredictability, he's violent, he's weirdly fun to watch. But some of the other ones, I don't know. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 53:24

Not so they all have personality, they have their little things, right? Like, obviously, Severin, you know, can do no wrong in this movie. I feel like he is the perfect vampire in this movie, right? Like, that's what you're expecting when you see a vampire film, you don't really get it until you see him, but everyone has their personality, right? Like, I think it's really interesting the dynamic of these characters because some of the characters don't really stand out in the way that you might expect. It's actually something that maybe if you're paying attention to the dialogue and things like that, you may pick up little snippets that make you think a little bit deeper about these characters, right? But like obviously they talk about Homer and they talk about Homer being like the old man in the kid's body, which kind of like you can kind of dismiss, right? They call him the old man, but I honestly think that he's probably the oldest vampire in this group. Maybe just the name alone leads you to believe this because who the fuck is named Homer anymore? This motherfucker could go all the way back to Roman times for all the fuck we know. And I feel like it's just it's just that subtle addition to the depth of the story and this movie, but I feel like it's so good and it's so interesting because I feel like the this poor guy, Homer. I mean, like, even he he's basically Claudia from the Vampire Chronicles, right? He basically got Claudi'd. That's what happened, if you really think about it. Like, he is the Claudia of this story, and it makes you like when you talk about like the end, like towards the end when he dies, we think of like, oh man, what an asshole. He's so like, he's just like, I gotta have this little girl, you know what I mean? But when you also think about it, there's gotta be like one little snippet about you that's like, wow, this is really tragic because he is just a kid when he turned, and he's been this kid for like hundreds and hundreds of years, probably, and like he doesn't know he's grown up, but he's stuck in this kid's body just like Claudia. It adds this different layer to the story. Maybe he probably just wanted to have someone that would relate to him a hundred years from now, and that's kind of sad.

SPEAKER_05 55:32

But also, he's kind of like the Rene of this movie.

SPEAKER_03 55:34

Oh boy, I feel like I can get what you're putting down in terms of Homer, but I can't help but think of Let the Right One In and the very big difference in their demeanor in comparison to Homer's, but also I really hate that we are like we bring up Twilight so much in this, and you know, at the end of the day, I start to think to myself, like, how many people confuse Catherine Bigelov with Catherine Hardwick, the director of Twilight?

SPEAKER_05 56:04

Okay, actually, fair question. Fuck it, let's just do it right now, Binx. I've been begging to ask you this question. I have been dying to sit here and matchmake with you because I want to know who the parallels are for you. Okay, because I feel like Severin is like the Emmett. Or I think if you want to go not directly in the Cullen family, Severin would be the James of this movie.

SPEAKER_03 56:27

He's the James, yeah. Yeah, yes, yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_05 56:30

Caleb is obviously the Bella, May is obviously the Edward. Yes, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 56:35

Well, yeah, for sure. Jesse is Jasper, but also Carlisle. Hate it, but obviously.

SPEAKER_04 56:42

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_03 56:42

Mm-hmm. Who uh but there's not enough of them. You see, this is the problem with the characters, too, is like I I wish that there was a little bit more than a lot of people.

SPEAKER_01 56:49

But is Homer Renezbe or is Homer like Dakota Fanning? You know what I mean? Oh, yeah. Whatever she was.

SPEAKER_02 56:55

Yeah, okay, Sean. Okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 57:00

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02 57:02

We need to look outside the Cullen family scope. You're right.

SPEAKER_05 57:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 57:06

That's great.

SPEAKER_05 57:07

Yeah. Yeah. And then obviously Caleb's dad is Charlie.

SPEAKER_01 57:11

Yeah, for sure. For sure.

SPEAKER_03 57:13

When you really but then I guess Bella doesn't have a sibling. Because I was gonna say, at the end of the day, like Jacob Black. There is a lot of huh?

SPEAKER_05 57:20

I mean, like the closest we would get is Jacob Black.

SPEAKER_01 57:23

Yeah, kind of. That's a little weird.

SPEAKER_05 57:25

It is, it is. Don't think too hard about it. Okay, got it. But we just okay, so Jesse's girl would be either Esme or Alice, or just a consolidation. I think that's what it is. I think I think those two are like the consolidation of Carlisle Esme, Jasper Alice put together.

SPEAKER_03 57:45

You know, I can see exactly why they were like, nah, we're not remaking this fucking movie because we already made this movie.

SPEAKER_05 57:52

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 57:53

We already made it.

SPEAKER_05 57:54

Yeah, it's all Stephanie Meyer's fault, quite frankly. If Twilight hadn't happened, if 9-11 hadn't happened, who's just gonna say that?

SPEAKER_02 58:02

I was like, wait a minute, we're about to be like, if 9-11 didn't happen.

SPEAKER_01 58:06

Ridiculous.

SPEAKER_05 58:07

If 9-11 didn't happen, we would have had a near-dark reboot in the early 2000s.

SPEAKER_02 58:14

So come on, where this cold following for this movie? Where's the uproar? I'm just saying.

SPEAKER_01 58:20

Crazy. I mean, aside from all this stuff, though, I also think that there's a really funny story, or not even funny, there's just a great story behind Jesse's character because Jesse's character, the way he pr prepared for this role, right? Like he created his backstory of being in the Civil War as a Confederate soldier. Story has it. He painted his hair black with tar and put on these fake nails or whatever, and just went around town like that in full character. Just went around town. Apparently, he scared a poor waitress at a Denny's. He picked up a hitchhiker that was like twice his size, who all also got freaked out and asked to get let out of the car at some point. Like, story has it. Like, that's the rumor of like where this guy got into character and how he like really invented himself for this movie. So, man, Jesse as a character, it goes deep. It goes deep.

SPEAKER_05 59:14

Yeah. I mean, we could have fought for the other side, but I get it. Jesse kind of sucks.

SPEAKER_01 59:19

Well, yeah, listen, you know, we're not talking about we're not talking about that, but the fact that he decided, I mean, I guess he's maybe thinking he's in the South, you know what I mean? So he's like, I'm old, I gotta fucking play the part, you know?

SPEAKER_05 59:32

Yeah, yeah, I suppose. You know, Caleb does have this interesting arc though, because we often see people who get enamored and you know, dazzled by the vampire lifestyle. And he's actually thrust into this violent world, but he also refuses to become a part of it, even though he goes along with it for 90% of the movie. I mean, I do like that he eventually, you know, stands on business, he holds his own, he doesn't give in. Even when the movie seemed like it's just building towards that inevitable ending. I wish I connected with more with him emotionally. I think he came around on me on the end, but May also had these moments of being compelling. I appreciate when she tried to like really hold on to her humanity, but the character felt a little inconsistent. This is one of the parts that really bothered me. She says she can't remember the sun because it's been so long. It's only been four years. Girl, really? It's the sun, it's four years. You just saw the sun, you've been in the sun this whole fucking time.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:37

Wow, yeah, that's true. That's true. I mean, their dynamic in a relationship was interesting too. I mean, Caleb obviously, to your point, like fighting the curse, if you will, for the most part, like he never really fully accepted it, so that was an interesting dynamic. But yeah, the relationship he had with May, I think was giving mixed signals. I think there was some romance in there for sure, but I also think there were parts where it felt like this mother-son vibe. It was kind of hard to tell at times.

SPEAKER_05 1:01:05

It felt like a lot of things. It felt like he was a pet. It felt like she didn't know how to take control of her own life, so she took control of someone else's. Nothing about their relationship feels super healthy. I'm glad that they got a cure. They're gonna go on with their lives. Guarantee you, if they get married, they're gonna end up resenting each other.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:25

You know, and maybe this says a lot about me and my need to go back to therapy because I was like, they're cutie. I'll take it. They're attractive people, but her people hurt people. They need help. Okay, that's without a doubt, of course. They're fucking vampires. Or well, one of them was temporarily. That enough is already gonna traumatize you for life, most certainly. I can't imagine being a vampire for four years, much less the others for years and years and years. The whole thing is very weird. The whole thing is very fucked. And if it when you think about it, just to get a blood transfusion, just to go back.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:01

It's kind of strange that they could just do a straight like a blood transfusion is not an easy task by any means, but the way this movie made it seem, it made it feel like it was a little too easy to transform back. Like it almost made it, which is also just an interesting dynamic for this film, right? Like it's it's no longer this eternal curse that you just can't escape from. Like it is very much reversible, apparently, right? And that is such an interesting thing.

SPEAKER_05 1:02:29

Yeah, I really want to point out here that Caleb's dad is a farmer, and Caleb's in the back of this truck looking at all these supplies that are conveniently there, and says, You ever transfused a person before? What is this farmer doing that he's transfusing things? What how does it be?

SPEAKER_01 1:02:46

You gotta save animals on the farm, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_05 1:02:49

Maybe I thought for sure, maybe a veteran veterinarian, you know what I mean? Like some kind of doctor for farm animals, but it's right, right. So he's also just made out to be a farmer. Maybe he's both, and that's fair. But it was quite the leap for his dad to just conveniently know how to transfuse people. Although, what the fuck am I talking about? I can't be mad about the transfusion. Edward sucked the venom right out of Bella in the first movie. The blood is clean.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:15

Man, you're killing it. And suddenly the blood was clean and perfectly fine. So we can't be too picky, folks. We really can't. And maybe that actually is the worst part of the movie, is like, although I'll give it to them that they go about the whole vampirism and this idea that to your point, Sean, it's not as big of a commitment as one may seem. It already doesn't seem like you've got too much of an appeal to be a vampire, but then on top of that, you just need a blood transfusion to go back. And it doesn't seem like it's entirely that difficult to do if you know how to do it. If you're a farmer, apparently you know how to do it. So I think that if I were to really think too, too, too much on it, this would probably like be a big downer for the film. So I'm gonna probably say it's the worst part of it because you catch anyone in the wrong mood and potentially like someone who's super diehard about vampirism, maybe they would raise some questions about it, or maybe not. Who knows? But it's definitely convenient. I think convenient is the key word here.

SPEAKER_05 1:04:24

Yeah, what was inconvenient was this movie's pacing and how long it wanted to outstay its welcome in the beginning of it. This movie took way too long to get to where it was going. Like there's a difference between a slow burn and a slog, and this felt in moments like it was getting towards the latter. So much of the first half is just like mood and setup. I felt what it was going for, but it didn't do enough to hold my attention, and I am so glad it managed to turn itself around. And I actually want to go back to what you're just saying, being said the vampire cure subplot, it just deflates the stakes. Vampires are fucked because of how permanent their condition is, like they're stuck that way. So that quick fix transfusion just guts the weight, it guts the consequence, and it makes the resolution feel way too clean. And it also just feels like okay, you got no skin in the game. This feels like a free trial, except like instead of ever having to pay for this service, you're gonna keep creating a new email address and just extending your trial indefinitely.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:33

Yeah. Did no one think of this before? That's what I'm wondering, because I feel like every I feel like every single doctor in history go going back to all these fucking like death plagues and diseases, the first thing they do is try to drain your blood or give you some different blood or something. I feel like that's always the thing.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:53

Sean, I want you to look at this fucking ragtap. I want you to look at this ragtag group of vampires. And tell me if you think any of them were smart enough to try a transfusion.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:03

I don't think any of them wanted to try a transfusion.

SPEAKER_05 1:06:06

I don't think any of them know how to read.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:08

I'm dead. That's crazy. Well, but hold on, because if they fought in the war, like, wasn't that to your point, Sean? Like, weren't they just doing blood transfusions left and right in terms of just like casualties of war at the very least? I just feel like, yeah, no one knows a fucking doctor that would think to do a blood transfusion. That seems odd. But then again, maybe there's also an element to like complacency of being okay with just being in the state that they're in. At some point, you just kind of don't bother to even try to go back to being a human, right?

SPEAKER_01 1:06:44

Yeah. I mean, very true. I feel like, you know, the worst part of the movie, it could be the it could be the slow burn aspect of the first half of the film. It could be the, you know, the cure that they gave us that we may not have needed in this movie. It could be all that. It could even be the title that we were talking about, right? Near Dark. Cool title, but really how the movie plays out, it definitely should have been called Near Dawn for sure. But listen, it's hard to come up with a worst part. It's a lot easier to come up with the best part. And can I tell you one of my favorite parts of this movie?

SPEAKER_05 1:07:18

Dawn.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:19

I wanna I just want to highlight the dedication that they had in this movie. The dedication that they had making this film, all the way down to the smallest details, because there is a scene, and Binx, you made a comment about it in the Animal Report. There is a scene where a mosquito bites Caleb, which does signify the start of his transformation into a vampire, which is kind of funny. But it's the fucking mosquito, man, because they actually incubated and grew their own real mosquito for this film to ensure that they could capture it without the risk of contamination.

SPEAKER_05 1:07:53

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:54

What that is dedication to the craft. Okay.

SPEAKER_05 1:07:58

So they grew their own mosquito just to kill it.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:00

I mean, essentially, yeah, they did.

SPEAKER_05 1:08:02

That's incredibly fucked up.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:05

I mean, it sucks for the mosquito, but like, listen.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:08

Did they name it? Did the mosquito have a name? Do I need to go back and change my animal report? Like, really give it some more, you know, like credit? That's crazy.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:18

Oh man, I don't know, but it's really crazy to think that they incubated this mosquito. Really strange.

SPEAKER_05 1:08:25

Incubate one single mosquito.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:27

I don't know. Maybe they had to do more, and maybe some of those were floating around out there, but I have no idea.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:33

How did this one mosquito was plucked from its family? There we go. Sacrifice.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:39

That's it. Wow. That's it. It's the horror movie within the horror movie.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:43

This is the actual fright factor.

SPEAKER_05 1:08:46

Look, I mean, that is dedication, Sean. You were absolutely right. And I wasn't planning on re-watching this movie, but now I'm still not gonna re-watch the movie, but I'm gonna remember it. I'm gonna remember it as a movie that incubated a mosquito just to not contaminate its talent. Oh, listen, okay, I'm glad I watched this movie. It's clearly influential, it does unique things with the genre, but it's just not my flavor of vampire. It's essential for vampire fans. I think you owe it to yourself to watch this as he was out there, see the other side of the Lost Boys, especially if you're interested in how horror tends to blend with other genres like Westerns or Noir. But this is not a casual rewatch. It's not something I recommend to someone unless they're already really into vampires or looking to fill in a gap. This is like a very specific kind of movie. If that sound works for you, you're probably gonna love it. But if it does not, it's gonna be a hard sell. And don't say I didn't warn you.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:51

Yeah, I will say that I am down to re-watch this movie, but God, I really do hope that when I do re-watch it, it's in an actual fucking DVD at the very least, or maybe a screening at a local theater for an anniversary at some point, or something else, something that wasn't in the way that I watched this movie, please, for God's sakes, because I think I would have maybe liked the movie a little bit more. Maybe I would have appreciated more, maybe not. Maybe I would have been like, wow, you know what? This pacing really is garbage. Whatever. The point is that I kind of want to give it another try, but certainly not in the way that I watched it this time.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:30

Yeah, that's fair. I feel like if you're gonna go out and watch this movie, try to find the best version of this movie. Try to get it on DVD if you can. You know what I mean? It's hard to find streaming. So you gotta find a good quality version of this film because it does add the to the visual aspect of the film. I think for me, it's definitely worth a rewatch. I'm actually super glad that I rewatched this one because it had been so long and I didn't remember a lot of this movie. And I have a feeling I would watch this when I'm scratching that vampire itch and maybe looking for something a little unconventional. You know what I mean? I think it's definitely one that I would definitely see myself watching again.

SPEAKER_05 1:11:09

Well, I can't wait to see how this goes when y'all rewatch it. But for now, there you have it, folks. Near dawn. Nope. Near dark has earned Universal Slash. Yeah, Sean, you really said it enough times that it got in my brain. We certainly had a robust discussion here. We've talked a lot of shit, but it doesn't end here by any means.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:28

Not at all. If you want to join this coven of gunslinging vampires from the Wild West, consider supporting the show and visiting patreon.com/slash hacker slash. This is where you can enjoy even more of the show, including bonus content with early access extended episodes with RB sides, movie nominations, and live shows.

SPEAKER_03 1:11:48

And if you loved listening to us review Twilight, I mean near dark, leave us a five star review wherever you get your podcasts. This helps us to continue to deliver great content for all you horror fiends out there.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:59

We'll see you next time, folks. And remember, the night has its price.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:04

It's time to pay the fiddler.