Monster Madness 2025: Round 3 Recap

SPEAKER_01 0:05

Greetings and salutations, horror hounds, monster maniacs, and lover of all things, macabre. Welcome back to the 2025 Monster Madness Tournament. If you missed it, we here at Hackerslash have traded hoops for horror, brackets for brutality, and free throws for fatal blows. While the world is locked into the March Madness basketball frenzy, we're locked into something even deadlier and even better. The battle to crown the greatest horror villain of all time. My name is Chris, I'm your friendly neighborhood slasher enthusiast. This week I'm joined by the Monster Madness Mastermind and demonic darling, Joe.

SPEAKER_00 0:41

Do you believe in miracles?

SPEAKER_01 0:43

We've officially slashed, smashed, and stabbed our way through this ulti 16, and as the dust has settled, we're left with the angry eight.

SPEAKER_00 0:52

Round three was brutal, and we knew coming into it that we were gonna have to say goodbye to some fallen fiends who have put up a good fight and really knew that people were gonna have to dig down and make some hard choices. We saw some shocking upsets. Uh, we saw some of the heavyweights still power through and remind people why they are such legacies in the horror realm. Um and we heard, again, a lot of really strong opinions from a lot of different sides about a lot of different matchups.

SPEAKER_01 1:25

Mm-hmm. Listen, there's a lot of hmm. As we go on, we remember energy in this shit. Because, folks, if you thought the salty 16 was rough, I need you to wait until we break down the matches that await us heading into the angry eight. Ugh, okay, let's get into it. Take us through round three, Chell.

SPEAKER_00 1:48

Alright. So the round three, uh, over a hundred votes were cast this time around. Uh, just absolutely rabid fans showing out for their teams, and it was incredible to see the highs and the lows because there were very few matchups that we knew right away could uh were going to be a runaway. All of them were close matches that could have been anybody's game. So unfortunately, we did have to say goodbye to some of some of the greats, but we also are seeing the cream of the crop rise to the top.

SPEAKER_01 2:23

Oh yeah. Listen, the the other thing about this, right? I made my predictions in our last episode. And I just want to point out that I only was wrong on two matchups, but also at what cost? The there were the two, there were two of the three that I cared about the most. Right. So you know what? I won at what cost.

SPEAKER_00 2:42

I I totally get that. And cost was a lot of a lot of the the conversation at what cost this time around. A lot of people, especially with our heavyweights, started talking about uh the quote unquote worst versions of these players and arguing that how strong are they compared to their worst versions? We had we had some heinous pictures coming up of terrible masks by Michael Myers and Godzilla with big cartoonish eyes. And again, the question the question really remained are any of us ever really redeemed, Chris? Yeah. Or are we only as good as our worst take?

SPEAKER_01 3:23

I think you know, you're only as strong as your weakest link. And for these franchise icons, some of those links are fucking weak.

SPEAKER_00 3:33

And that's the challenge of some of these longtime icons like Michael Myers and Jason Voorhees. They've been playing for a long time. They have a lot more to critique as opposed to uh the the Art the Clowns, who has had three movies in a row that have hit. We have Jennifer Check, who is a standout in one movie. So it really goes to show that even though legacy means endurance and strength, it also means that there are some more pitfalls and some more some more uh cuts in the armor.

SPEAKER_01 4:04

Yeah, I think that's gonna be something that's interesting as we get down into the nuance of the upcoming rounds because the challenge that awaits us is at what point do you get even more critical with your vote casting? Listen, I know I was in it for Art the Clown. All right. I was devastated to see that famed lazy guy Jason Voorhees has somehow slumped his way into the next round after sleeping for how many years now since the 2009 reboot. But the fact that he's somehow floated into the next round over Art the Clown, at least I won't have to make the hard decision between Michael and Art.

SPEAKER_00 4:44

That is very true. And we knew coming into this round that Jason was going to have to get back off of his heels uh if he wanted to fight and win against Art, and clearly he stepped up and did, but it was anybody's game. They were trading points here and there for most of the tournament, most of the round. That it it could have gone anyway, anyone's game, but that last minute twist, like any good horror movie, is what set Jason apart.

SPEAKER_01 5:14

Yeah, you know what? Listen, good luck in the next round, sir. Good luck. One thing that was hilarious to me, I was uh really fostering some dialogue here with some folks that I work with, and we're talking about the brackets and they're assuming their votes. And when I said Michael Myers versus Pinhead, one person said, Is it Michael Myers with a Brazilian blowout? Sheesh.

SPEAKER_00 5:36

Listen, we have all made bad choices with our hair. Look back at any middle school yearbook. There's plenty of choices being made. Again, I'm not sure if if we need to judge a whole monster's character on his darkest days.

SPEAKER_01 5:54

Mm-hmm. Yeah, listen, that's fair. That's fair. At least Michael in his worst days looks a little bit better than some of the other chintzy things we had here. I know that there was a photo submitted of Godzilla, who had some big, as you described it, deer headlight size.

SPEAKER_00 6:10

Yes, he clearly it was it was a young Godzilla, still fresh and new to the cinematic world. And yeah, very clearly was sorting themselves out. So very much a far cry from the the monster and the dark-eyed, just absolute king we see today.

SPEAKER_01 6:32

Yeah, bright-eyed and scaly-tailed. We got it. What were some of the closest matchups that we saw in this round?

SPEAKER_00 6:38

Gosh, I mean, going back to the Godzilla Freddy Krueger, it was it was a tight, tight race for both of them, which we knew going in, especially even before voting opened in this round, there was a lot of conversation in the Discord over uh the the fashion choices of Freddy Kruger versus again just the legacy of Godzilla and those conversations about the what Godzilla means to not just horror but cinematic culture, Japanese culture.

SPEAKER_01 7:13

Yeah, and also to Americans who really love that Taco Bell dog. Yo quiero taco bell.

SPEAKER_00 7:20

Yo quiero. Of course, we also had uh some conversation as Jennifer Czech moved on this round. She put up a fantastic fight against Frankenstein. It was probably one of the least least close matches, but it was still a good fight nonetheless.

SPEAKER_01 7:42

Yeah, talk about a Brazilian blowout. I was really proud. This is a win for women everywhere.

SPEAKER_00 7:48

Absolutely. And and lots of credit to Spooky Bitch in the Discord, who has been on the Jennifer Check train from day one, from round one, just absolutely spreading the good word about one Jennifer Check, and it's paying off. She has rallied up the Discord into quite quite the quite the fizz right now over Jennifer Check. And this was even before the conversations started coming in about Women's History Month, what this would mean for a woman, female villain to take on some of the oldest and longest legacy characters in in our horror world facing off against three classic universal monsters and winning.

SPEAKER_01 8:34

The future is female.

SPEAKER_00 8:35

The future is female, and everyone better be freaking scared.

SPEAKER_01 8:39

Yeah, but here's the other thing. This is where Jennifer is gonna run up into an interesting battle in the next round. And we'll look at these matchups in just a minute, but that's the kind of energy that I'm talking about here, right? We have these matchups. Jennifer has somehow lucked her way into getting these old dusty, crusty men in these matchups. And now you're about to go kaiju, so we'll see how she fares. And I believe in Jennifer, to be clear. Megan Fox, we out here. I get it. However, I do have a concern. I would like to report to the game warden. I believe this is rigged because there's no fucking way the house always wins.

SPEAKER_00 9:20

The house always wins. Yes, again, we were talking about who was trapped with who when we had Billy from Black Christmas on there. And clearly it was, for lack of a better term, an absolute shutout with the Amityville house. The house always wins, at least this far. Um, against the Deadites, though, I think it'll be interesting because a lot of the the power of the Deadites come from wherever they are. They are definitely creatures of their environment.

SPEAKER_01 9:50

Yeah, the Deadites can bring it to the house. Here's the thing The Amityville House, we what are we doing, folks? What are we doing? Listen, I love Amneyville horror as much as the next person. Alright, I love the original movie. Enjoy the remake, the franchise as a whole, highly fucking questionable. When Spooky Bitch mentioned the your weakest link or your worst movie, I believe it was her or perhaps someone else who shouted out Amneiville Thanksgiving. If you know, you know. Thanks for suffering that watch party with us in the Discord. But what the fuck? I love that in the 70s, and let's just presume for a second that this is all a spoof and this is all fucking just like a big con. George Lutz could never have imagined that this tale that he was spinning could have then resulted in just some random horror podcast doing a villain breakout, and then this fucking house is defeating massive horror icons. That's fucking crazy.

SPEAKER_00 10:51

The Lutz's and the Warrens are rolling over in their graves right now, realizing they left so much money on the table and not not realizing the untapped potential they had.

SPEAKER_01 11:02

Yeah, now I need to fucking see the Amneyville house in a celebrity deathmatch.

SPEAKER_00 11:07

I I I do think that needs to happen. I actually really want to see that happen.

SPEAKER_01 11:12

Yeah. Oh, put some legs on that bad boy.

SPEAKER_00 11:14

Yes. And I will say, unfortunately, we we do have to say goodbye to some impressive competitors who maybe weren't some of the top billing, but definitely fought the good fight, uh, especially Hannibal Lecter and Jigsaw. They they got this far. They just got they they got as far as anyone else in the Salty 16, but I don't think they got as much of the love in the celebration or the conversation.

SPEAKER_01 11:40

Okay, so call me crazy, and I know that what I'm about to say isn't gonna really pan out very well. Because the logic is only partially there. Michael Myers versus Pinhead. I think we all look back on Michael Myers as like a younger Michael Myers or in his prime, or maybe the latest Blumhouse trilogy, but like, you know, ageless, yes, timeless. We don't think about him as old man Myers when he's at his best, at least. Jason Voorhees, the boy who drowned in the lake, he's still a big guy, but he's undead, and is he arguably a little young? Who knows? But when you come down to Freddie Krueger, another older guy, you have Hannibal Lecter and Jigsaw. The age gap here between Freddie Jason Michael to old ass Hannibal and old ass Jigsaw. Listen, I'm not I'm not one to say that age defies everything, but I do think the consensus of how maybe perhaps how old our politicians are getting, I think people just want to see some young blood in the race.

SPEAKER_00 12:50

And that is absolutely valid. And I do, I do think uh that is demonstrated in who came to the angry eight. We talked last time about how Hannibal Lecter and Jigsaw, yes, they were very much clinging to their pasts. Their power was in their past. They had their times, their heydays, where they were top of the pile, king of the castle. Uh, but yeah, they did not have that staying power. They were, you know, we remember when they were, sort of, instead of seeing what they're doing today.

SPEAKER_01 13:25

Yes, and I believe this also comes on the heels of an article that's circulating that's saying that the latest Saw movie has been dead in the water for a long ass time.

SPEAKER_00 13:34

It was a tough week for the Saw franchise. First, first this loss and then the announcement of cancellation. Uh, we cannot confirm or deny that the jigsaw loss was uh a direct reason for the cancellation, uh, but we have yet to hear back from uh the publicists on The Truth or Not.

SPEAKER_01 13:56

You know, we just say, is it coincidence? I think not.

SPEAKER_00 14:00

Nothing is a coincidence in this game, Chris. I think it may be madness, but it's certainly not coincidences.

SPEAKER_01 14:06

Oh, for sure. Now, obviously, we have a lot ahead of us as we look into the angry eight, and this is where it's going to get highly, highly competitive. Let's start off with our first seed. We have Michael Myers and Jason Voorhees. Now, on the one hand, Titans of Horror. On the other hand, this shit has been debated since the 80s.

SPEAKER_00 14:30

This is an iconic matchup. This is as iconic as Magic Johnson and Larry Bird for all my classic basketball fans. This is something that people pay millions to watch. This is something so iconic that even the filmmakers of Freddie versus Jason couldn't imagine or fathom a Michael versus Jason movie.

SPEAKER_01 14:51

Absolutely not.

SPEAKER_00 14:52

A battle royale for the ages that we may never bear witness to again.

SPEAKER_01 14:58

Yeah, this is a tale as old as time, a song as old as rhyme. I'm gonna say that the shape is going it all the way, because Jason is a tank, Jason is a force of nature, but Myers, he's the blueprint. Billy got knocked out in the last round. Billy pioneered the slasher subgenre, and Michael Myers perfected it, and then Jason, well, Mrs. Voorhees, and then subsequently Jason, ripped it off. Jason may have more kills for body count, and we're gonna have to really go back and double check the math on this between the Halloween films and the latest entries and the fact that, you know, Jason didn't it wasn't even his own fucking movie. We we get it. But Michael Myers has survived decades of reinvention without losing the core mystique. I think he's pure unstoppable evil, and I think he's gonna take this one.

SPEAKER_00 15:43

I have to agree with you on this one. Michael has been putting in the work for years, and like we said about Jason, he's been asleep since the 2009 remake. We've seen people try to copy with In a Violent Nature, very Jason Voorhees-esque, copied but but never never duplicated. So there have been some attempts of some look-alikes, but we have not seen Jason putting in the work, putting in the mileage that Michael Myers has been doing pretty consistently for for decades. You know, there were lulls, but you always kind of knew that there was gonna be another Halloween movie coming down the track. And with Friday the 13th and Jason, we don't really know. He he's kind of been back on his heels in hibernation before coming out to to this tournament.

SPEAKER_01 16:29

Yeah, you know what? And why not just acknowledge the fact of the matter right here, right now? You know how many Halloween movies Michael Myers hasn't been the killer in? Season of the Witch. Right. Even then, his movie did play on the TV in the background. Because we also did get Corey Cunningham and Halloween ends, but Michael was still the killer in that movie, too. Oh yeah. And he fucked him right up. How many Jason how many movies has Jason not been the fucking killer in? Two. The first movie, and then when fucking Roy the ambulance guy or the fucking paramedic goes through to avenge his son that apparently he had no one knew about. So we we have that. Some of his kills were also fake simulations in space. I think Jason has been patting the body count and also writing the coattails of other people's glory.

SPEAKER_00 17:21

I said it. Hey, he if he if he is all look and all flash and no hard game, I I will not be surprised by it. I do think I I do think that Jason is gonna have his work cut out for him, and I think he's gonna have to play a game he's never played before. And yeah, I don't I don't think he comes out of this out of this matchup against Michael. Yeah. I think it's Michael's game to lose.

SPEAKER_01 17:47

Yeah, okay. One more fucking point here because now I'm just thinking about it. You put some water on Jason, he cowers, he grumbles, he fumbles. You put water on Michael Myers, he just looks like even more of a badass. And he keeps walking through you and he massacres firefighters. You don't fucking go as hard as Michael Myers on his worst day. Okay. Next matchup though, we have an interesting one. We have Apex Manipulation, Apex Hunter. We have Ghostface versus the Predator.

SPEAKER_00 18:17

Well, this isn't the first time that Ghostface has upset in the extraterrestrial matchups. Uh, there was a lot of conversation. We did not think that Ghostface was going to make it out alive against the xenomorph, and we were all forced to eat crow when they were able to pull out a win.

SPEAKER_01 18:37

Yeah, I think it's still sheer luck. I mean, even Sigorny Weaver as Ripley survived the xenomorph, mostly by escape, not by true defeat. But here's the thing Ghostface may be iconic, but ghost face is just people. Not even a single person. It's someone human, it's someone vulnerable, it's someone panicked when things go south. I think about some of the Predator movies, and I think of even Prey. And I think about someone who has really had to keep it together. So Predator against someone calm, cool, collected, sure, but we know that Ghostface is too emotional and unhinged to really hold solid ground. So while Predator can see the hit heat signature, I can see that you know he doesn't ever fucking get surprised. Ghostface can be caught off guard and tricked and easily manipulated. I think Predator is gonna adapt in spite of Ghostface's surprises.

SPEAKER_00 19:31

I think Ghostface's biggest challenge is their identity crisis. They have changed faces and strategies so many times over the years and can't seem to decide what type of game they want to play throughout these rounds. They've had matchups against Jaws and Hannibal Lector that were pretty decisive wins. And then there was ones against the xenomorph where they it seemed like they weren't putting up as much of a fight. So I think if Ghostface goes in and knows the game that it wants to play against a predator, it has a chance. But I do think that when it comes down to it in a high pressure situation, there's no way the predator doesn't come out on top because he is unfazed, unbothered.

SPEAKER_01 20:19

Yeah, I never saw Alien versus Predator, but did Predator come out on top of the xenomorph? I don't know. I don't know. Maybe it was a draw like Freddie versus Jason. Who's to say?

SPEAKER_00 20:28

Who's the real winner?

SPEAKER_01 20:29

Yeah, I think we were. Now, I I do think again, Predator Annihilates Ghostface. I think Ghostface's deception can't work on a master hunter. But what will be even more interesting than that is seeing our next seed, the kaiju versus the succubus. Who do you got?

SPEAKER_00 20:47

This is probably one of the matchups. If you'd asked me when we started this, I did not think we were going to see a matchup like this. I've said it before and I've said it again time and time. Godzilla is taking this all the way to the finals. So I do think that uh Jennifer will put up an admirable fight, but I do think Godzilla stomps her out pretty, pretty quickly, uh, without much of a much of an issue, I would say.

SPEAKER_01 21:14

Yeah, I'm going to go a little controversial here. I think Jennifer Czech is gonna pull the upset of the tournament by playing the long game on Godzilla. And I know that it sounds insane, but hear me out. She thrives on seduction, she thrives on manipulation, she thrives on taking down victims who underestimate her. And I think this whole matchup right now is her underestimation. Her whole victory lap, right, so far, is the underestimation, and I think that's gonna be Godzilla's destruction. I don't think she's ever gonna physically fight Godzilla, but I think she has the chops to get inside Godzilla's head, even on a theoretical basis, and I think the fan vote is gonna really carry her through. You know, women are behind her, we're in women's history. Month. Come on now. I think this is the power of feminism.

SPEAKER_00 22:04

And I would love to see that. I mean, Godzilla, we can put in probably that classic horror monster realm. And as we have seen with Jennifer Czech already, she has put those classic monsters from all genres on notice that she is not to be fucked with. That new versus old is going to be the name of the game. So I absolutely think that Jennifer's strength could be an outlasting Godzilla. Again, she's not going to square up against Godzilla and win uh hand to hand. But if she can evade Godzilla enough, tire Godzilla enough until Godzilla's making mistakes, I do see a path where Jennifer Czech pulls it out. But I am faithful that Godzilla, especially after just defeating uh the King of the Dream World, I think King of the Monsters versus Queen of uh Queen of the Succubi, it's it's a no-brainer for me. Godzilla wins.

SPEAKER_01 23:04

Yeah, I don't know. We'll see. We will see. Now, I think the reality is that Jennifer Check is gonna go up to the biggest motherfucker in the room and say, fuck you, I'm gonna make you my bitch. But let's talk about the second biggest thing in the room, and that is the motherfucking Amityville house. What the actual fuck?

SPEAKER_00 23:24

The dark horse. Again, even from round one, when they came from behind to uh upset Leslie Vernon, who had a sizable lead and has just been knocking down opponents since. Not in necessarily many runaway games, but putting up decent numbers and making no mistake that they are the top contender.

SPEAKER_01 23:48

Listen, this is fucking cursed humans versus cursed real estate. And I don't know that this is a round in which the Deadites don't completely obliterate the Amineyville house. Because, listen, they're a haunted house, but I think the Deadites make it a home. They're cozying up the cellar, they're making it warm.

SPEAKER_00 24:07

And Deadites feed on their location. While we talked about Billy kind of being able to maybe harness some of that power of the Amityville House, I think the Deadites are gonna be able to do what Billy couldn't and really dig into the soul and the core of what drives Amityville House and turn it on, turn it on the house real quick and making the house regret that it squared off against the Deadites.

SPEAKER_01 24:36

For sure. Because again, the Amdeville House only fucking works with its creepy and cursed energy if you step inside of it. But the Deadeites don't fucking wait, they bring hell to your door. And the other matter, listen, the Amdeville tries to play the Amdeville House tries to play the long game with like the psychological torment and making you a little bit off for days and turning the dead and the patriarch of the family into a monster. But the Deadeites turn into fucking monsters and then they're total bitches about it too. They're talking all kinds of mad shit. So I think the Deadeites absolutely fucking take one because they don't wait for you to make the mistake, they force you to make it.

SPEAKER_00 25:17

I I do think, yes, some of the heckling and getting into the headspace, there's no way Amityville is gonna be able to get into inside their heads because they're they're already tapped. There are there is nothing there for Amityville to to soil or to break. They're already broken. They are playing a null hold barred game. I mean, look at their their matchup against Pearl, another known absolutely crazy player, Thoughts of Delusion as a star, and wasn't even didn't even register to them. They are playing their own game in their own world, and whoever they happen to be up against just is the unfortunate one who gets to bear witness to the chaos.

SPEAKER_01 26:02

Yeah, honestly, I could go for seeing the cast of Space Jam going up against the Deadites, and the Deadites will still fucking slam it.

SPEAKER_00 26:09

I I I think we need that as an exhibition game next year. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 26:13

1,000%. Man, this shit is gonna be fucking crazy. But for now, there you have it, folks. We'll see if these predictions hold up, but one thing is for sure, monster madness is about to get even bloodier. Our angry matchups are locked in, but it's up to you to decide who moves on. Now I remember that voting starts at midnight on Wednesday, March 19th, and runs until noon on Friday, March 21st. You can follow the link in our show notes to cash your vote.

SPEAKER_00 26:41

And be sure to be kind to yourselves, check in on one another, because everyone is going to have to make some really tough decisions this round. And be sure to stay in touch and stay in the conversation with day-to-day minute-by-minute updates in the Monster Madness Discord. We have people fighting the good fight for their teams and really making these games interesting. And some of those games are decided, are won and lost by the conversations in those Discords. So get in there, start showing your spirit you haven't already, and let's make the Angry Eight onward some of the most iconic and incredible conversations about our favorite horror villains.

SPEAKER_01 27:27

We'll see you next time, folks. And until then, let the bloodbath ensue.

SPEAKER_00 27:31

I must break you.