377: Heart Eyes (2025)

SPEAKER_01 0:04

With eyes wide open under the moonlight with this tire I with eyes wide open over here.

SPEAKER_02 0:20

Greetings and salutations and welcome to Hacker Slash. If you're joining us again, welcome back. This holiday sucks ass. If this is your first time listening, welcome to the party. We are a horror movie review podcast dedicated to telling you whether a movie is a hack, a total joke, a waste of time, or a slash.

SPEAKER_00 0:37

Totally killer, pun intended.

SPEAKER_02 0:40

We believe horror is for everyone, and as such, we're rating these movies with a perspective we gain from our varied walks of life and the flavors of fear we fancy most. My name is Chris, I'm your friendly neighborhood slasher enthusiast. This week I'm joined by the classic horror connoisseur Sean.

SPEAKER_00 0:54

I have ultimate sexiest playlist.

SPEAKER_02 0:57

Love is in the air this week, as we're back in theaters to check out the latest Valentine's Day slasher.

SPEAKER_00 1:02

And if you support the show, you can also check out our B-side at the end of this episode where we get into some of our favorite Valentine's Day horror movies, as well as some of our guilty pleasure rom-coms, because everybody's got at least one, right?

SPEAKER_02 1:16

Before we brace for Cupid's Bow, though, we have some follow-up.

SPEAKER_00 1:19

We definitely have some follow-up, and you know, in the theme of Valentine's Day, we gotta give some warm love to our new patrons. Thank you, Trevor, Paige, and Miki. We love to see it. Thanks for joining the fam. I hope you enjoy the show.

SPEAKER_02 1:37

Absolutely. Miki's also joining us live for this recording right now, which is super exciting.

SPEAKER_00 1:43

Very true.

SPEAKER_02 1:43

Hell yeah. Welcome to the family, folks.

SPEAKER_00 1:46

And that's our follow-up.

SPEAKER_02 1:47

Well, last week we reviewed Happy Death Day to You, which was a Christopher Landon sequel that blended horror with a sci-fi Back to the Future 2 Bend. Landon also had his hand in this week's film, though, which sees director Josh Rubin put a horror spin on rom coms. The film follows a pair of coworkers who find themselves in the path of a notorious serial killer. A killer who has their eyes set on slaying romantic couples on Valentine's Day. This week we're talking about hard eyes. Who are you expecting going into this?

SPEAKER_00 2:17

I honestly I really didn't have a whole lot of expectations leading up to this movie's release. I think these holiday horror movies, especially these niche ones, like the you know, the holidays that we don't automatically think of, like Christmas, Halloween, things like that, they can pretty much go one of two ways. But as we got closer to this movie's release, I noticed that it had a surprisingly high score on Rotten Tomatoes. I think when I first checked it, it had something like 92%. And then didn't check it today, but I think the last I checked, it only dropped to an 84%, which is where I think it is, maybe now, somewhere in and around there, which is still pretty damn good for a slasher movie, right? Like I think that's pretty cool. And I was also hearing that there were a lot of crazy and creative kills in this movie, so I was starting to really anticipate to get my money's worth of kills in this slasher flick.

SPEAKER_02 3:15

Listen, I saw the trailer for this, Sean, and I thought exactly that that I'm gonna get my money's worth with a slasher. Because A, you take any fucking song that I love and you put it in a horror movie trailer, you make it sound a little bit more creepy, I'm in. It doesn't take much to get me there. And this one had can't take my eyes off of you playing over these scenes, and I I was so, so excited for it. Obviously, it looks like we had an incredible cast. We've seen our leading lady in Totally Killer, we've seen our leading man in Scream 5 and Scream 6. So my expectations going into this were just I was down to clown. It's Valentine's Day, which is already pretty fucking campy. It's a slasher, and the killer design looked incredible. So I really just expected to have a great time. What I did not expect though was it to be a blend of a slasher and a rom-com. That I had no idea we were gonna get.

SPEAKER_00 4:13

I mean, that is very, very true. I did not play into that at all either. I think that is definitely a feel of the movie that I wasn't expecting. But man, I will tell you, there's a lot of different things that this movie did, and I feel like one thing that might be a sleeper if you're not paying attention, is the soundtrack to this movie slaps.

SPEAKER_02 4:38

It really fucking does.

SPEAKER_00 4:39

It's so good with songs ranging from like Outcast to the Supremes and a solid amount of like less popular songs mixed in there as well. It really felt like the soundtrack was pulling its weight in this movie, almost like working to keep that Valentine's Day feel or setting or whatever prevalent, right?

SPEAKER_02 5:00

Sean, every single fucking song in this movie I have on a love playlist on my phone that I have custom made.

SPEAKER_00 5:06

There you go. It speaks to you.

SPEAKER_02 5:08

It does. This movie could not be cut more for me. I guess it could have been more gay. If it was more gay, it would have been more for me, I suppose. But this one is such a great blend of being a slasher and being, you know, something that can identify and have fun with a lot of the rom-com tropes. You can honestly truly make a drinking game out of this where you can call it all the rom-com references. For example, this movie takes place on one long ass night in Seattle that in itself makes it sleepless in Seattle.

SPEAKER_00 5:40

So true.

SPEAKER_02 5:41

And then you have obviously like the humiliating me cute that is further humiliating when the reveal of the cutie you ran into later turns out to be someone you work with on their first day with you.

SPEAKER_00 5:51

Of course.

SPEAKER_02 5:52

It's silly as fuck, but I'm here for it. And that's why I had so much fun watching this movie. Sean, I laughed out loud so much. Unashamed.

SPEAKER_00 6:03

Oh, for sure. We were laughing, we were pointing out, like my when I say we, my wife and I went to see it in theaters, and we were laughing, having a great time the whole time. We were pointing out shit, we were pleasantly surprised by it all. It wasn't taking itself too seriously, but it wasn't that it wasn't serious, you know. That it was serious when it needed to be, and then there were moments where like it felt campy in a very cheesy way, like it felt a little cheesier than maybe your average rom-com because it was kind of a parody of that in a way, and it just felt great. It was just a fun time to watch everything kind of blend together.

SPEAKER_02 6:40

It was about as cheesy as a dish of the melting pot, where people inevitably fucking end up on Valentine's Day.

SPEAKER_00 6:46

Terrible dates.

SPEAKER_02 6:47

I've never been to a melting pot, by the way. But it does make me think of Glee, fondue for two. If you know, you know. One thing that surprised me though is exactly what you said about it being serious in some moments, and then really comical, really fun in others. I expected one tone in this movie, but there's actually something pretty interesting that they do with this killer. Because I thought this was gonna have zero lore to it. I didn't think there would be any real buildup to it. But where this movie drops us, this killer's already famous, and it borrows a lot of things from real life that I actually think lend itself well to making this something you can be even more invested in. For example, H E K Killer. Oh, yeah. It's giving B T Killer. And when you think about the idea of a killer targeting couples, that's exactly what the Zodiac did. And we think of any really notorious serial killer often either entered home and attacked couples or son of Sam was shooting at couples in cars. So that is something that really stood out to me, and I was like, oh, I was a little caught off guard by it.

SPEAKER_00 7:54

Yeah, I mean it's a great call-out. It really does play into other things, right? It's very self-aware in a couple of ways, right? It's self-aware in the in the same sense that maybe Scream is self-aware, but it's also self-aware in the sense of like, hey, it's poking fun at not just some of your favorite horror movies, rom-com movies, whatever. It might be even poking fun at some of history's famous serial killers.

SPEAKER_02 8:20

Mm-hmm. It could. There are some moments in there, and we'll get into that in the spoiler zone, where it definitely raises that question of like, okay, what is the intention here?

SPEAKER_00 8:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 8:31

But obviously, this means that this movie isn't scary by any means.

SPEAKER_00 8:37

Yeah, I think, yeah, it's not very scary. I think this is a perfect movie, though, to take your date, right? I spe especially on Valentine's Day, obviously, because it's a movie that takes place on Valentine's Day or in and around Valentine's Day, right? So it plays heavily into the rom-com vibes without losing any of the fun slasher energy. So I think that is a really good thing. Like when you're thinking of like a good date night movie, right? I think that kind of plays both sides of the field there, which is great. It also has just enough moments that make you cringe. So you throw in a couple of decent jump scares and you got yourself a date night, folks.

SPEAKER_02 9:22

Yes, and horror always goes really well with a date night, but this is such a great option and a safe option of yeah, okay, I'll give you your rom-com, but I still want my horror movie. This feels like a great compromise for the both.

SPEAKER_00 9:37

Yeah, for sure. And here's the thing: it's not that we haven't gotten a horror comedy before, but I can't really think of another solid rom-com horror movie that really sets out to do what this movie did. Because sure, we've gotten movies like Lisa Frankenstein recently, but that to me isn't really like a slasher in the true like vein of slasher movies, I don't think. I think what this movie does really well is it pulls heavily from a lot of different movies across multiple genres. I, you know, I think it's pulling inspiration from movies like Jason Lives all the way to fucking Titanic and classics like Clueless and Romeo and Juliet, Bonnie and Clyde, all these things, right? But this this movie plays with its inspirations and I think it delivers a fun and fresh story that just feels original and fun.

SPEAKER_02 10:31

Absolutely. I agree with you a thousand percent, but I do want to take a step back because even just looking back to what we did last week, right, with Happy Death Day to You, we've seen horror do Groundhog Day, but with horror. Back to the Future, but with some kills, Freaky Friday, but with murder. And now we have a rom com but with a slasher twist. So it's exactly what you think it would be when we say put these two things together. The great thing though is that doesn't mean it's badly executed. Think of Freaky. I know Sean, you hacked that movie, but I think it still had some polish and it was well done. Happy Death Day to you, happy death day. These are movies that have done pretty well for themselves, and I have to really go back and watch them all. But I think this might have been executed a little bit better than some of those.

SPEAKER_00 11:23

Yeah, no, for sure, because I feel like there are moments that lean really heavy into this like romantic comedy vibe, but then it brings you right back into these, you know, gory little quick kill slasher type type feelings, and I think it does that really well, so you never feel like you're you're lingering too long in one feel or one genre.

SPEAKER_02 11:47

Let me tell you though, there is a moment in this movie in its third act, as it feels like it's maybe making its way towards its ending, where you might think you're heavily in the rom-com of it all. And that was the moment that the guy next to me in the theater walked out because he thought it was over.

SPEAKER_00 12:07

Hmm. Yeah, for sure. I think the ending is just as fun and and lighthearted as the rest of the movie was. I feel like we have fun revealing the antagonist in the third act, and when we get to the end, right, it leans more on the romantic comedy side of things, obviously, to your point, but I think it gives us just a fun little snippet in that post-credit scene that just really is fun.

SPEAKER_02 12:34

Yeah, the the the ending of this movie is lighthearted, it's fun, it's brutal. There is some fucked up shit that's going on in this ending, and I will say there is an element of the ending that makes it feel kind of like okay. It makes fun of something that I think is very pervasive in this moment of modern dating. And so there's that whole element of it. We'll again we'll explain that in the spoiler zone. There is a small element of it that disappointed me slightly, but I can't wait to see how we actually rate this movie. Now, before we actually score it, Sean, how would you describe the gore score?

SPEAKER_00 13:12

Yeah, I mean, this movie delivers, I feel like a really a well-balanced amount of gore mixed into its romantic comedy feel. I think it dishes out a heart stopping bouquet, if you will, of kills utilizing a variety of different weapons, as if we were opening a heart-shaped box of assorted chocolates. So whether you like something sweet or something a little more salty, there is the perfect amount of gore for everyone earning this one a medium splatter of blood and gore.

SPEAKER_02 13:45

And what about the animal report?

SPEAKER_00 13:47

Well, hard eyes is a killer that targets couples in love, and if you love animals, you can rest easy knowing that there was no harm done to our furry friends in this one.

SPEAKER_02 13:56

Let's go ahead and get into our ratings and hard eyes from 2025. Was it a hack or a slash?

SPEAKER_00 14:03

I feel like this is gonna be short and sweet. I think this movie, Hard Eyes, delivers exactly what it set out to do. We got a fun, fast-paced slasher flick with a little extra heart and maybe one or two ripped out as well. But I feel like this isn't just a horror film. It fully embraces the rom-com genre as well. I feel like you're gonna see this movie pay homage to horror movies like Scream or My Bloody Valentine, as well as things like Ten Things I I Hate About You or Nodding Hill. And I think this movie winks at the audience without ever feeling cheap, right? Like I feel like it's the self-awareness of it all, making sure it really never takes itself too seriously. And I feel like it's honestly the perfect date night movie, because whether you're cuddling up close or covering your eyes, I feel like you're bound to have a good time. You could even swoon, if you will, over all the Easter eggs we get in this movie. So it's a fun time, and I wanted to just share this little poem. Roses are red, these two genres should clash, but I guess murder is a love language because this one's a slash.

SPEAKER_02 15:15

Damn, that was good. That was good. I have my own love letter that's nowhere near as poetic as this shit, Sean. That was well done. That was exceptional. We are gathered here on as this episode publishes Valentine's Day, and I in particular am here to profess my love for this fucking movie from the rooftops. Catch me outside AMC like John Cusack with a boombox over my head, because we have been starved for good Valentine's Day horror movies. The slashers with holidays, they're getting a glow up. We had Terrifier 3 and Christmas, we had Thanksgiving recently. This is the next iteration of that. As a slasher enthusiast, I still enjoy them, but the best one by far for Valentine's Day has been the original My Bloody Valentine. Harry Warden, the minor, he deserved a better modern remake. This movie infused joy into me, which is such a difficult thing to do. This movie was violence with a touch of romance, it was dread with a serving of optimism, it was the fantasy of finding love when you least expect it, juxtaposed with the hopelessness of dating and moving on from some fucking loser who wasn't great for you in the first place. It's genuine, it's heartfelt. I laughed so much in this movie, I fell in love with the characters, and I took it exactly as seriously as the movie wanted me to, which, like you said, Sean, was not very seriously at all. This movie was made with a love of horror and a love of romance, but above all else, it was made with fun. Even when it addresses some infuriatingly real and relatable takes on the horrors of modern dating. This is the best mass appeal slasher we've gotten in a while. The kind of slasher that you can take anyone to, which is why it's a perfect slash in my book. And with that, Hard Eyes from 2025 has earned a universal slash. Now I will say, I don't think Pinks would have slashed this one. So we'll see what they have to say for themselves for NMAC in the end of your episode. You can catch this movie in theaters right now. If you're listening to this episode post its theatrical run, do let us know what you think. You can find a link to check it out online in the show notes. Now, when we return from our break, we have a lot to dissect, the rom-com of it all, the killer of it all, and I can't wait to dive into that spoiler zone territory with you in a bit.

SPEAKER_00 17:54

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SPEAKER_02 20:34

Holy shit, I loved all of them. That's my problem, John. Not a bad fucking kill in this movie. Each and every one of them was a sight to behold or served as perfect punctuation in this movie. Maybe you have a favorite that stands out to you. There are so many dramatic ones that I think are great. I'm just gonna start even just with the first kill in the movie that we truly see, which is the photographer with that fucking blade going through the camera lens into the eye. So good.

SPEAKER_00 21:05

Holy shit! So good to start the movie that way.

SPEAKER_02 21:08

As a photographer, I think I would hate for that to happen to me.

SPEAKER_00 21:12

I mean, yeah, definitely. It's it's uh it was and it happened so fast that if you blinked, you were just gonna see the aftermath. So that's definitely one like brace yourselves. If you if you're coming, if you're joining this right now and you have seen the movie, right, then you know what we're talking about. But if for some reason you're sticking around because you don't care or you just want to learn a little bit more about it before making the decision to watch it, don't blink because there are this movie just starts off and if you look away, look down, grab your popcorn, grab for your drink, whatever, you're gonna miss it.

SPEAKER_02 21:48

That was a fucking great cold open kill.

SPEAKER_00 21:51

It was a great cold open kill.

SPEAKER_02 21:54

Even just the series, like they really build up how obnoxious this fucking couple is. And bless this photographer, man. He was just like your dick.

SPEAKER_00 22:04

I did love it though. It really just you're like opening the movie, right? And there's this this couple is like doing their engagement thing, and it's so over the top, it's so cheesy, it's so you're it's cringy.

SPEAKER_02 22:17

Again, with a fucking song that I have on a playlist.

SPEAKER_00 22:20

Of course, of course, because the soundtrack is superb. But yeah, this couple, you're like, where is this movie going? Is this is this what it is? Is this gonna be like a really shitty B movie type shit that we're gonna get here? Is this gonna really completely flop? And then all of a sudden, boom, you get that kill, and you're like, oh fuck, yeah, here we go. And then the chase scene as he's trying to shoot this bitch, like it's crazy, man. It gets crazy.

SPEAKER_02 22:43

What a final girl chase at the very beginning of the movie.

SPEAKER_00 22:46

It is, right? Like right away. That's what I'm saying. It just starts going. You at first, for a split second, don't even think it's gonna, it's gonna like take off in that regard, and it does. It does go down that path.

SPEAKER_02 22:57

Mm-hmm. It escalates right into the fucking wine press.

SPEAKER_00 23:01

Yeah, the wine press. Okay. Dude, it's too good. It's too good, right? Like that whole that whole build-up to get there was amazing and just the compact, like, didn't know how they were gonna show that, right? And it was just this perfect blend of gore but campiness, but also like the eyeball popping. I mean, what is not to love about that, right? Like it's a it's a perfect example of a very serious, very gory, very brutal kill, but not taking itself seriously enough for us to like really feel the severity of that.

SPEAKER_02 23:36

It was a fun little squish.

SPEAKER_00 23:38

A little squish, a little squish, made some wine.

SPEAKER_02 23:41

I was wondering what the fuck she was in. It didn't even connect to me that she was at a fucking winery. I should have put those dots together. But she's chilling in that machine, and I'm just like, what the fuck is she in, dude?

SPEAKER_00 23:53

I'm with you. It took me a forever to figure out what that was.

SPEAKER_02 23:57

Okay, but also the way that the hard eyes killer just caresses the green button before pushing it. Excellent. It was a little touch.

SPEAKER_00 24:06

It's so good. Those are the little things too, like if you miss it, that when you rewatch it, you'll start to pull those little nuances out of the film that almost play into what we reveal later in the film, too, which I think is super great. But yeah, I didn't catch the winery thing at first either. I was like, what is going on? What is this thing?

SPEAKER_02 24:26

I thought they were just outside and it was pretty.

SPEAKER_00 24:28

Yep, I know. I thought it was just like a park or something. Had no idea we were at the vineyards, you know? Super, super good. I will say I got one of my favorites is towards the end, and it's literally when we see Detective Shaw getting stabbed in the neck with the metal straw to start. Okay. Because of course, this fucking metal straw would somehow find itself some significant meaning.

SPEAKER_02 24:54

Planet Saved.

SPEAKER_00 24:55

Planet Saved.

SPEAKER_02 24:57

And how fucking adorable and cheesy and disgusting is it? That this little rom-com fucking meat cute joke from the very beginning of the movie has circled his way back to be a murder weapon. That's the great part here. It also proves that anything can puncture anyone with enough force.

SPEAKER_00 25:17

It is true. But it's not even just the straw, because that is the thing that kicked it off, and I was like, oh, perfect. I almost called it as it was happening. I was like, it's gonna be the fucking straw, and it was the fucking straw. But then to get forced onto that statue and be like impaled through the neck and slowly like decapitated as you fall off of that, and it's a statue that's holding a severed head, or it looks like it's holding a severed like everything about that was just perfect.

SPEAKER_02 25:45

Okay. What makes it even more perfect is the first thing that I thought of when I saw her being beheaded was Mason Gooding's character in Scream 6 while they're doing like the fucking Randy speech, he's saying beheadings, and that's all I have now. I have children's hearing fucking beheadings in that whole scene.

SPEAKER_00 26:08

Oh my gosh. That's that's great.

SPEAKER_02 26:10

That's absolutely a fucking great kill. I also want to like throw it back a little bit to the drive-in. First, what a great fucking scene, what a great location. I love that we circle back to the drive-in. I love the drive-in in Salem's Lot. I think we did it even better here.

SPEAKER_00 26:28

They're playing the Philadelphia story, fantastic film, right? Come on.

SPEAKER_02 26:33

But let's also look at this. We had the homage to the Texas Chainsaw remake with a tire iron through the fucking boyfriend, then doing the Paris Hilton of it all from House of Wax, putting her head down, penetrating to fucking reveal this whole hole in her face, then zooming out from that hole. Incredible. It was like the classic van kill in Texas Chainsaw Massacre. That was a gunshot wound. This is a tire iron.

SPEAKER_00 27:02

It was so good. It like the whole moment of that happening one was brutal, and it was fucking awesome. Everything about that scene was awesome, which I'm we may even get to later. But that was a great kill, both kills back to back. But I even loved the shot that we get when they come back to get the tire iron as a weapon and pull it out.

SPEAKER_02 27:24

Like the sword and the stone.

SPEAKER_00 27:25

Like the sword and the stone. Ari said that. She was like, Is this the sword and the stone? I was like, it has to be the sword and the stone. And it's just the face, like as you're looking up in this dude's face, this hippie dude's face, is like with his eyes wide open and everything. It just is with eyes wide open.

SPEAKER_01 27:42

Under the moonlight with this tire iron with eyes wide open.

SPEAKER_00 27:51

I also think we gotta talk about Detective Hobbs and the Machete chop to the dick. The dick chop.

SPEAKER_02 27:59

Yeah, listen, we're here for it. Hot dog slice. Let's go.

SPEAKER_00 28:04

This one was like, oh yeah, you you want some chopped sausage, here we go. We're ready for you. That was absolutely great. Uh, but man, just a lot of really fun kills. Just a lot of really fun kills.

SPEAKER_02 28:17

So many. And here's the thing though. Before Detective Hobbs gets chopped in the dick, we hear what we think is Detective Shaw. But the fact that you don't see Detective Shaw immediately gives away that she's involved.

SPEAKER_00 28:32

That was definitely a moment. For some reason, I was getting those vibes early on in like the interrogation scenes that I was like, I feel like she's maybe in on it. She's acting a little sus. You know what I mean? It's very I'm getting a weird vibe here. What about was it that cop that got impaled with the flagpole and lifted in the air?

SPEAKER_02 28:54

Yeah, it was very much even reminding me of Halloween Kills when Michael Myers stabs a firefighter and lives him up.

SPEAKER_00 29:03

Yes, yeah, absolutely. So fucking good. It was too good.

SPEAKER_02 29:06

That was a great moment, but also the lead up to that moment where our main girl Allie has this flagpole, and she's like, Oh, God bless the USA. It was just like these little moments of comedy. She was so lovable.

SPEAKER_00 29:21

She was super lovable, definitely. Why did I feel like I got like the Jason Lives vibes out of Eli's death?

SPEAKER_02 29:30

Because you got exactly Jason Lives. The director was heavily inspired by Jason Lives.

SPEAKER_00 29:36

It felt like I was in a Jason Lives movie.

SPEAKER_02 29:39

Yeah, he absolutely did. There's a whole article I'll actually link in the show notes where he talks about A, his love for that movie and B, how it served as his inspiration because this is his first slasher. He's done other horror movies, but this is his first slasher. He also had the stunt actor watch Jason Lives as well.

SPEAKER_00 29:59

Yeah, everything was just so perfect. Like it net makes total sense now because I was like, holy shit, this is like really paying homage to that movie.

SPEAKER_02 30:08

And what a specific movie to pay homage to.

SPEAKER_00 30:11

Absolutely. I mean, out of all of them, this is the one we're going to, which I'm not mad at. I think it's it's fun, but like, dang, that was good. Because I think Jason Lives is one of those, one of the more atmospheric, like it has like this little this visual vibe to it, I feel like.

SPEAKER_02 30:26

But I also love just using those classic slashers in the DNA of this movie because they started there as the baseline and then they would just tweak it. Like he had the classic headcock in there, and he wanted to pay homage to Jason and then also Michael Myers. So taking a movie like this and thinking about the physicality of this role, yeah, sure, we have three different hard eyes, just like you have three different fucking ghost faces, but the stunt actor portraying this character did such a great job physically.

SPEAKER_00 30:59

Yeah, absolutely, definitely. You know, one of the things that I love the most in this movie is actually the writing. I have to say, the writing in this movie is chef's kiss. It's clever, it's witty, it's fun, it's not taking itself too seriously. It's got a lot of little nods and Easter eggs in the dialogue. The character dialogue is great. I I want to just say Philip Murphy, not for nothing, right? Like you finally nailed this one. I wasn't, obviously, we know we mentioned this earlier. Like, I wasn't the biggest fan of Freaky, although I've warmed up to it a little bit. Didn't like it's a wonderful knife too much, and Time Cut was basically a Timu totally killer. But this movie, dang, this movie was definitely it. This one was a well-balanced, well-written film.

SPEAKER_02 31:54

Okay, so I I get it. I actually watched Time Cut after I got home from the theater watching this because I just wanted more of this vibe, and it was fun. Like, I get it, it's not totally killer, but it was fun.

SPEAKER_00 32:08

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 32:10

Yeah, you know, hey. Something else that I loved though, and you know, I talked about the killer design, the mask, incredible. I loved the light up eyes and the practicality of the light up eyes. There was a reason for it.

SPEAKER_00 32:23

So good.

SPEAKER_02 32:23

All the heart accents in this movie, incredible to look at from the killer's mask to the throwing knives with the little heart cutouts. This is what the movie Valentine wishes it could have been a hundred percent.

SPEAKER_00 32:37

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 32:38

But the color grading in this movie, it's fucking beautiful. We were talking earlier about that opening chase scene when she like runs it towards the wine press. You can see blue moonlight just falling into this movie and falling into every scene. So when they take the blue, but then they blend in the red for not only the fucking gore and the violence and the blood, but the red for Valentine's Day in this romance, it is beautiful.

SPEAKER_00 33:04

Yeah, it was definitely beautiful. Visually, everything in this movie added to the film, the lighting they use, the the color grading, right? The soundtrack, the acting, all of it was fantastic. But yeah, I think that was a great shout-out for sure.

SPEAKER_02 33:22

There's so much to love here. I was just thinking about that opening scene again. Like, obviously, I was talking about how beautiful it was. It was one of the best scenes in the movie. I have like a bunch of them that just have these moments that I loved, but what a strong opening. I think this movie is as strong as I would think like the 2009 Friday the 13th reboot, where it felt like a mini Friday the 13th movie inside of a Friday the 13th movie. Granted, this movie I think has a great movie that follows its called open, but just the length of those kills of that chase.

SPEAKER_00 33:59

I mean, you're totally right. There's so many, like when you just look back at like anything I jotted down that I absolutely loved in this movie from like even just scenes or moments, there's so many little moments throughout this film that I quickly jotted down that I thought were absolutely fun, hilarious. Uh, but I know I was alluding to it before when we were talking about kills, but I gotta say, the whole scene where they are hiding in the van at the drive-in, and they get like and they get into this serious conversation, literally having this serious conversation while the hippie couple in the back are just fucking.

SPEAKER_02 34:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:37

There's moments you start to hear these like subtle groans while they're having these conversations, and then all of a sudden you hear some ball slapping sounds that were just absolutely insane. And I'm thinking to myself, is this really fucking happening? Is this movie really doing this? And yes, this movie was really doing this, and it was fucking glorious.

SPEAKER_02 34:56

It was fucking hilarious. That is such a great scene overall, even outside of just the van component of it. But what I fucking love was they filmed that section in two separate parts. So they filmed their section in the front of the car with their serious conversation on the on one day, and then on a separate stage, they did the couple fucking in the back. But while they were filming their serious conversation, they had the director in the back just doing all the crazy sounds, so they were just actually responding to something fucking hilarious.

SPEAKER_00 35:29

Oh, that's fucking great.

SPEAKER_02 35:31

It is, but oh my gosh, just that drive-in scene. We have Heart Eyes showing up on the scene, and it really felt like Michael Myers in Haddonfield on Halloween night in the 2018 sequel, when he's just like Michael Myers shows up on that street and he looks like he's just taking it all in like a fucking kid in a candy store. Yeah, and this motherfucker strolls, Valentine's Day, he's out here kill couples, and there's couples everywhere. Excellent.

SPEAKER_00 36:01

It is excellent, and I think those moments, even when you're tying it back to to Halloween, right? Like I feel like there are these moments where I feel like it's a little bit it takes you aback because when you're watching these slasher films, usually the MO, right, is for this antagonist to be kind of lurking in the shadows and just waiting for the right moment to surprise you and and kill you, right? But these moments where we're just kind of walking through this mass of people, and people are like, Oh my god, is that the hard eyes killer? Oh my god, people are starting to notice, and you're at this point where you're like, I don't give a fuck. I'm here, I'm gonna start slaughtering people.

SPEAKER_02 36:40

Yeah, okay, but there's the whispers, but then also remember in the beginning of the movie, these kids are fucking walking around with a hard ice killer mask.

SPEAKER_00 36:48

Right, right.

SPEAKER_02 36:48

So now it's like scream, and there's a glorification of it. It's like scream, but also like not for nothing. Real example, Luigi, who shot the CEO of United Health. How many people that day and later in the weeks after were A thirsting over him, but then B dressing up like him in a look-alike contest?

SPEAKER_00 37:10

Yeah, that's crazy.

SPEAKER_02 37:11

You think, oh, that's so campy, it's so far from reality, and then you see, oh, wait a second, people would probably actually do this. So for him to walk around there, it's a little bit of like, okay, people are assuming that this is just another big fan of H E K.

SPEAKER_00 37:27

Yeah, that's true. Everything stems from something. You know what I mean? Definitely. There are some lighthearted moments too that I think are really hilarious. Uh, towards the end, very small moment towards the end when the ambulance is there and the paramedic she comes up and she's like at the end and she's like, she's like, got another call. I gotta take these blankets and start taking the blankets and dips. I was like, what the fuck? I don't know if that happens in real life, but that is fucking hilarious. Like, hold on to the you've had your time with these blankets. I gotta go.

SPEAKER_02 38:05

Listen, when you cut government funding like this, you gotta just fucking you know put it all together.

SPEAKER_01 38:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 38:10

Okay. Speaking of those hilarious moments, there's a few that really stood out to me in this movie. We have Allie and Jay in her apartment, and Mickey pointed out in the chat, the apartment scene gives Scream Six in New York. Oh, yeah. But we have hard eyes being in the closet. And that felt like again, the 2018 Halloween when Vicky goes to the closet and sees Michaels Meyer there. But this bitch throws a vibrator at him, man.

SPEAKER_00 38:38

The vibrator!

SPEAKER_02 38:40

And then the fact that it starts vibrating, oh my god, it was amazing.

SPEAKER_00 38:44

The fucking vibrator. Holy shit. I was not prepared for that.

SPEAKER_02 38:49

Yeah. But again, that's just how great this movie is, it being fun and lighthearted, and then switching you right back into a fucking horror movie. Because how many times do we have these rom-coms where someone has to discreetly try to hide something that they don't want someone to see?

SPEAKER_00 39:06

All the time, right? But it's ne it's sometimes it's like we and we did play with like cleaning up the house and all of that stuff, but holy shit, when we just like honing in on the fucking vibrator that's sitting on the bedside table, and then later on it's fucking hits the floor and starts vibrating too. Like we just kept getting those moments.

SPEAKER_02 39:26

Yeah. Another move moment that I really loved, Monica and Allie in the bathroom reading the reactions to the campaign.

SPEAKER_00 39:35

Oh yes.

SPEAKER_02 39:36

First off, Monica is fucking hilarious. So we get this scene where it jumps from like the bathroom to then them out to eat, and she's talking about Jay, whatever. But when Monica is reading a comment, she says, as someone who may die someday, I find this campaign tone deaf and borderline a bliss. And it was just the level of like the high quality writing in this film really shined in that fucking moment, and then her delivery of every single line. Yeah, she doesn't have a sugar daddy because that's problematic, but she has a sponsor. And then the greatest burn I think I've ever heard. Imagine someone saying, You look like a before picture.

SPEAKER_00 40:17

That was a good one. That was a glorious quote. I had that one written down as well. Oh my gosh. Great burn for sure. Loved it. There was also a whole boardroom meeting of the whole company, and they have Tommy reading the reviews, and it's just like so negative and terrible, and he just keeps going off on like how shitty this project is and how much people disliked it was so over the top.

SPEAKER_02 40:40

I loved this whole thing where Crystal's talking about this campaign is certainly ill-timed.

SPEAKER_00 40:46

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 40:46

And it's just this reality of like how many times have you gone up the chain and gotten something approved, or it was someone else's idea, and then it all just fucking rolls back down onto you. It fucking sucks. We've all been there.

SPEAKER_00 40:58

We have, we have for sure. I mean, listen, you got a killer on the loose attacking couples, and then you're putting together a pitch for a campaign that just shows couples dying. I mean, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 41:09

It is the reality of fucking corporate marketing, it's terrible. But Crystal also saying, if you could do me a huge favor, shut the fuck up.

SPEAKER_00 41:15

Yep.

SPEAKER_02 41:16

Every character in this fucking movie has such a great place.

SPEAKER_00 41:19

Definitely. They definitely do. Oh man, remember the crossword, that crossword scene moment? Like five five-letter word for dog ending in H. Bitch. Female dog? Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_02 41:35

That does work. I think about even the supporting another supporting character. In the meet cute scene towards the beginning of the movie, we have we're well, we're meeting Allie for the first time. We get all the lore of the killer. We see the news reports, etc. But then she's there making a very complicated or waiting for an order for a very complicated drink. Jay has the same drink, and the barista is like, it's actually a very calming drink move. We're busy.

SPEAKER_00 42:03

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 42:04

They think it's something special and cute, and then he's like, get the fuck out of here. I always do hear about people's reaction when they're so fucking sick of people making these complicated ass drinks thinking they're special, but it's what everybody gets.

SPEAKER_00 42:17

Yep, yep, yep. It's so true. You get so jaded that you're just like, you can't even be happy for the person, even though that's like their one happy drink. It's so true. I've been there. I've been there. I made a lot of drinks for Starbucks back in the day.

SPEAKER_02 42:31

Oh yeah?

SPEAKER_00 42:32

I did. I was a little barista for quite some time.

SPEAKER_02 42:35

Little barista boy. Bless you. Obviously, I know we've talked a lot about these incredible scenes, but I think these scenes really come to life because of how fantastic the performances in this movie are. I think starting with Jay and Allie.

SPEAKER_00 42:49

Dude, Jay and Allie were a great couple. Even by themselves, they were great because I feel like Jay was at first so cringy good, you know what I mean? Like just way too good that you just couldn't buy into him at all.

SPEAKER_02 43:05

Yeah, he was really a like a strong red herring.

SPEAKER_00 43:09

Okay, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 43:10

Because you again, you think he's like a dream guy, he's too good to be true, he can't be real, but he gets funnier and funnier as the fucking movie goes. And I also love okay, yes, it would be too apparent if Jay was a killer because they also call him the consumer cupid. So having this double life of someone who's very financially wealthy because of Valentine's Day, and then also fucking hating Valentine's Day or killing couples, that would be interesting, but it's also just so fucking overdone and played out. And what we get instead is him and Allie being such a great balance and support for each other and a great team together.

SPEAKER_00 43:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 43:52

She was no damsel in distress this whole movie.

SPEAKER_00 43:54

Right. He was for sure. And you did kind of warm up to him as it went on, and I also I also had that moment where I was like, ooh, I think the red herring of it all got me. I'm like, ooh, it was it this guy? But let me tell you, I also had a brief moment where I kind of thought it could have been Allie and Monica.

SPEAKER_02 44:13

Oh, tell me about this.

SPEAKER_00 44:16

Well, it just there was so much dialogue of like hatred, you know what I mean? That I thought that could have even that almost served as a red herring. I feel like Allie was talking so much shit throughout this movie that I was like, hmm, maybe these maybe her or maybe her and Monica are getting together and doing these kills. But you know, as it went on, obviously it turned into something else. And then obviously, when we're jumping different cities and things like that, maybe it didn't really add up because there was no hint to them not being anywhere other than where they were.

SPEAKER_02 44:48

That's true.

SPEAKER_00 44:49

But I did think for a split second that that could have been an interesting angle.

SPEAKER_02 44:54

That could have been an interesting angle indeed, and I'm not mad at it. When they found the ring with the initials on it, I never thought that it belonged to Jay, because to his point, who the fuck has their own initials on a wedding ring? That's fucking dumb.

SPEAKER_00 45:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 45:08

But I thought, oh, is this Jay's ex? Like, is there a bitter lover or ex-lover here? And maybe she hates Valentine's Day or hevades Valentine's Day because of this being so such a big part of Jay's life, and they're out for revenge, and then they really just stalk him at his jobs. That that could have been something. But I like that it was neither of those things. I don't really love the killer options that we got. Like I mentioned earlier with the detective Shaw, it's pretty obvious that she was involved when you don't see her die in the hallway.

SPEAKER_00 45:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 45:42

But I I I like that it wasn't anything to do with Jay. I love that it was just a complete coincidence that they the killers happened to see them kiss in a fucking terrible rom-com moment.

SPEAKER_00 45:57

Right, right. They just happened to catch that, and it was like just the passion behind the kiss that they were like, ooh, we're gonna redirect our focus to this couple, as it turns out.

SPEAKER_02 46:08

Okay, so another aspect of the characters in this movie, Sean, I couldn't remember in the moment in the theater. Obviously, I knew I was looking at Jordana Breoster, she was in Fast and the Furious.

SPEAKER_00 46:22

Yep, yep.

SPEAKER_02 46:22

But Hobbes and Shaw, I didn't watch the fucking Fast and the Furious movies past like the first or the second, so that component I knew it was something, but I couldn't tell what the fuck it was.

SPEAKER_00 46:34

Yeah, it's it's true. I've watched a lot of the Fast and Furious franchise. I don't think I actually ended up watching Hobbes and Shaw, but I'm very well aware that we had the Hobbes and Shaw like spin-off type thing from the franchise. And when I heard that they were it was just a light bulb moment, just like the character. Like when when somebody tells you like I'm Detective Shaw, Detective Hobbes, you're like, Really? Hobbes and Shaw? Really? And they're like, I've never seen that movie. It's too, it's too good. It's too good. And then yes, uh, Jordana Brewster or whatever, like, great. Uh Ari was like, who is she, where is she from? I know her, I know her. I was like, that's Fast and Furious, Paul Walker.

SPEAKER_02 47:17

It's also the faculty.

SPEAKER_00 47:19

The faculty. Dang. It's such a oh man, I love that movie.

SPEAKER_02 47:24

You know, she was in some good shit. The faculty, which is apparently getting remade.

SPEAKER_00 47:28

Interesting. I don't know how I feel about that, but she looked great. I haven't seen her in something in a long time, maybe since an older Fast and Furious or something, but she looks great, man.

SPEAKER_02 47:39

She absolutely does. Who else looks great? Devin Sawa.

SPEAKER_00 47:43

Mmm.

SPEAKER_02 47:44

Detective Hobbs. Okay, sure. Sure. Good luck to him with his fucking Chucky series getting cancelled. But honestly, great performances overall from folks who have been in horror. Obviously, we have Olivia Holtz playing Allie, who was the young Pam in Totally Killer.

SPEAKER_00 48:01

Oh, that's true.

SPEAKER_02 48:03

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_00 48:04

Dang. Look at that. Look at all these connections.

SPEAKER_02 48:06

And obviously, we know Mason Gooding from Scream.

SPEAKER_00 48:10

Of course. Of course.

SPEAKER_02 48:11

Famed son of Cuba Gooding Jr.

SPEAKER_00 48:13

So many great. There's so much here. This movie is just riddled with fun little nods and tiebacks and little pathways to other things. But yeah, I mean, it is interesting that we got this whole thruple situation, right? I think Detective Shaw was definitely the one that most of us will be able to guess at one point or another along the way. Didn't really see the IT guy coming because he had such a brief moment. But maybe if I watch it back and watch that first introduction, maybe I would see a sign. They had the couple thing, and then throwing in that they had Eli or whatever. He was in love with the idea, like a mega fan. That whole thing is ridiculous.

SPEAKER_02 48:55

It is, and I do think it's for me the worst part of the movie. But I see why it's there, I just don't like it. So yeah, I think it plays and it almost like pokes fun at a couple different things. It's almost like the ethical nomogamy of it all. Every time I'm on a fucking dating app, if I go to the relationship style, fewer and fewer people are just down for monogamy.

SPEAKER_00 49:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 49:19

Now, people who this works for, like I have plenty of friends who are very much uh either poly or just like into ethical non-monogamy. Good for you, that's great. It's just not something that I think would ever really work for me, but that's what it felt like it was poking fun at. And I don't know that it worked for me.

SPEAKER_00 49:36

Gotcha, gotcha. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 49:37

You know what I mean? Like it wasn't as funny as I hoped it would be.

SPEAKER_00 49:41

I gotcha. Yeah. I'm with you. I don't think it turned out to be super funny. I think the idea is ridiculous. I don't think they played into it enough for it to be funny. Yeah. You know what I mean? It was just the reveal of it, and they kind of told it, and it was that. I don't mind the couple of it all. I don't mind that they get like got off on this. Like it was their fetish or their kink, right? Like that I kind of like, that angle is great. But that I don't know that there was a reason to add the third.

SPEAKER_02 50:10

Yeah, the sexual angle or the sexual fantasy of it all is very aligned with what we've seen with different serial killers, etc. But I do think that the couple, or at least him as the husband, having such a brief moment. I thought that was more leaning into making fun of sloshers where the killer's just sometimes this random ass person is kind of like old man Jenkins, I would have gotten away with it. It wasn't for you and your meddling dogs. So again, to your point, right? The third, I think it serves to set up the shift that we get from thinking the movie is over to then oh shit, wait, there's two more people we have to deal with. It's again the three ghost face. But I could have done with something different.

SPEAKER_00 50:54

Yeah, I get you. I do also really want to point out very quickly that I think that the CEO boss lady Crystal, she kind of looks like Steven Tyler. She kinda has a Steven Tyler look to her. Just a little bit. Just a little bit.

SPEAKER_02 51:11

You're not wrong at all.

SPEAKER_00 51:13

I just had to point that out. But yeah, it there's not a lot to dislike in this movie. I think obviously adding that third killer was kind of a little bit off-putting. And if I'm really trying to pull something out of here, I really, really, really enjoyed some of the really creative kills that we did get in this movie. And it's not that I didn't enjoy some of the quicker ones, you know, just like a little knife to the face or a knife to the gut or whatever, right? Uh passing that dude in the in the drive-in. He just happened to be a bystander. You got got. But I feel like if we maybe played in a little bit more, gave us a couple more really uh more lingering creative kills, maybe playing into the Valentine the Valentine's Day themes a bit with the weapons and whatnot, I think that could have been pretty interesting. So I don't know if not getting that is one of the worst parts, but that's just a personal opinion. Little carve of bee mine in your chest, you know.

SPEAKER_02 52:16

Ooh, cute. Mason Gooding talked about how this he thinks it could be the start of a great franchise and he would make these movies for the rest of his life because he had so much fun doing it. I would love to see more of that, to your point, in the upcoming films. But for this movie, every fucking year, hands down, inject it into my veins. I'm here for it. I can't wait to watch it again, and I particularly can't wait to watch it again to go back and catch some moments that completely just it washed over me in the moment in the theater. I was laughing with it, I loved it, but then there was so much good in this movie that I was trying to remember that I forgot some of these things. Like I'm even thinking about Monica's monologue or her rant at the end of the movie where she encourages Allie to go get Jay from the airport, and she's listing in so many rom-coms in her rant. I want to go back. I can't wait. I'm gonna go see it on Valentine's Day, and I'm gonna just like really soak in that moment and just dissect it for what it's worth.

SPEAKER_00 53:22

Damn, that is so true. There's a lot to re-watch in this movie. I wish I was seeing this movie again. I probably won't see it in theaters again because there's too many other things to go see uh that I gotta fit into the schedule, but there is so much to see with the rewatch. There's a lot of great Easter eggs and nods to so many films. It's super fun. There's little things that you could easily miss that I probably there may be a couple things that I did miss, you know what I mean? And I do want to re-watch it. I agree. I think this is a movie that we can we can definitely put into the lineup for February when you're thinking of getting into a nice Valentine's Day love type horror flick. This is the perfect one to throw in there in February. I hope I watch it before next Valentine's Day, but time will tell.

SPEAKER_02 54:13

Well, time will tell indeed. And for now, there you have the folks. Heart Eyes has earned a universal slash. Now, we certainly had a lot of love and a big robust discussion about this movie, but the conversation doesn't end here by any means.

SPEAKER_00 54:28

It sure doesn't. If you have Heart Eyes for us and want to find out how you can go further than then this episode alone, consider supporting the show by visiting patreon.com slash hackerslash where you can enjoy even more of the show, including bonus content with early access, extended episodes, movie nominations, and live shows. But listen, folks, we're a cheap date. We don't need elegant chocolates, fine dining, or expensive flowers that are just gonna die in 12 hours. Just leave us a five-star review wherever you get your podcasts, because that is the kind of shit that helps us continue to deliver great content for all you horror fiends out there. Sorry to stalk and run, but I'm trying to make this yoga class.